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OfflineLisergiko
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Is my granny a schizophrenic?
    #19649077 - 03/04/14 10:25 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Mom's mother has always had paranoid thoughts, since before I was born (19 today). She always doubts on her loved, she accuses us about attempted murder with poisons. She says my grandad(80) does oral sex with the neighbor. He has diabetes-driven depression, he always runs mad when they confront each other (They live divided in rooms in the same apartment). She has accused me of being a junky, well ok, I became later but this is the only thing that she has gotten right :P
Anyways they're both dieing of anxiety, heart diseases, diabetes..and I thought I'd could end all of this. The impact of an entheogen trip could possibly "cure" her, in this case which one ?


--------------------
Love Sex Drugs


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Lisergiko]
    #19649222 - 03/04/14 11:13 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

but this is the only thing that she has gotten right :P




How do you know?  :satan:

Quote:

and I thought I'd could end all of this. The impact of an entheogen trip could possibly "cure" her




No


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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OfflineFishOilTheKid
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Lisergiko] * 1
    #19649304 - 03/04/14 11:48 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Its one thing that I think all people of earth should experience at some point in their life if not incorporate IT ritually somehow(?) :zomgzomgzomg:

But people seem so fragile an unadventurous and suspicious.  It could possibly send her to the psych ward and her delusions might build on one another into a crescendo of acute breakdown.  Then meds and labels and all that entails.

But, IME that's not all bad news.  Exposing yourself to the chaos of your own mind (and the medical community's response) and its potential for better or worse is progress regardless if you can make it to the other side of sanity.  I just don't know if unstable people that have been battling for so long need to be thrown into further turmoil as some learning feat of temporary enlightenment.:sad:

Perhaps the light of Truth will reveal itself if she chews it over with em.  Dunno.


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OfflineSse
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Registered: 12/28/12
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Lisergiko]
    #19652620 - 03/05/14 12:13 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

old hearts no joke. many variables
ask a doctor
maybe something gentle like kanna with breaks? slow small dosages, maybe a 20x or something that dissolves easily in water, measured.


--------------------
"Springs of water welling from the fire"

"Life may seem to flee in a moment, but when the mind is freed of the veil of ignorance, and illusion that comes between the mind and the truth, life and death are only opposite sides of the same coin - "water welling from the fire."


"Within us, we carry the world of no-birth and no-death. But we never touch it, because we live only with our notions."
-Thich Nhat Hanh
instant
"Experience always goes beyond ideas"


Edited by Sse (03/05/14 12:15 AM)


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InvisibleRahz
Alive Again
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19652677 - 03/05/14 12:28 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MushroomTrip said: No


:thumbup:


--------------------
rahz

comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace


“I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car."


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OfflineXUL
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Rahz]
    #19653820 - 03/05/14 11:18 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Rahz said:
Quote:

MushroomTrip said: No


:thumbup:




--------------------
TRUMP 2020


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OfflineLion
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Lisergiko] * 1
    #19653824 - 03/05/14 11:18 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

I really think entheogens are only valuable when people research them, seek them out, and use them in an appropriate environment.  If you are a mentally unstable elderly person who knows nothing about them, and you are being given these substances by a relative in an uncontrolled environment, nothing good is going to come from the experience; and as others have said, it could be bad for her stability.  They are simply not a cure-all.

It's sad that LSD, psilocybin, et al. have not become naturally accepted into the psychiatric and therapeutic world.  They were making a natural progression towards acceptance in the United States and Western Europe based on many very positive, detailed results, but all of that was derailed by the DEA and subsequent pressure by the U.S. government for its European allies to adhere to its regime of banning all such substances.  There is evidence that LSD, administered in low doses in a therapeutic setting, has brought about strengthening psychological changes in very young, troubled children, elderly people, and every age group in between.  Unfortunately, that research was never built upon, and it would be unwise to assume that as a recreational user of these substances you would be qualified to help someone gain insight through such an experience.


--------------------
“Strengthened by contemplation and study,
I will not fear my passions like a coward.
My body I will give to pleasures,
to diversions that I’ve dreamed of,
to the most daring erotic desires,
to the lustful impulses of my blood, without
any fear at all, for whenever I will—
and I will have the will, strengthened
as I’ll be with contemplation and study—
at the crucial moments I’ll recover
my spirit as was before: ascetic.”


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OfflineSse
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Lisergiko]
    #19654297 - 03/05/14 01:41 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

http://www.sceletium.org/

Contraindications

There have been no confirmed reports of drug interactions, However, because of the nero-receptor activities of Sceletium there may be interactions with other pharmacokinetiv drugs. People taking any psychiatric drug (including all anti-anxiety drugs, sedatives, hypnotics, antidepressants and anti-psychotics and so-called designer or recreational drugs) or any cardiac medications, are advised not to take Sceletium-containing products.

As with most supplements and modern drugs, safety in pregnancy has not been established.

Sceletium is used to rebalance the brain and nervous system and thereby relieve symptoms of depression. Combined with other well known herbs, this formulation has been proven to be extremely effective and safe.


--------------------
"Springs of water welling from the fire"

"Life may seem to flee in a moment, but when the mind is freed of the veil of ignorance, and illusion that comes between the mind and the truth, life and death are only opposite sides of the same coin - "water welling from the fire."


"Within us, we carry the world of no-birth and no-death. But we never touch it, because we live only with our notions."
-Thich Nhat Hanh
instant
"Experience always goes beyond ideas"


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OfflineFishOilTheKid
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Sse]
    #19655385 - 03/05/14 05:27 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)



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Offlinecircastes
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: FishOilTheKid]
    #19658080 - 03/06/14 05:18 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Terminal patients taking LSD: "Oh shit I am a divine being, this universe is sacred, God alone exists, and it all extends well beyond what I think is some kind of death. GIVE ME MORE YOU NURSE SHITBAG GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE *patient is gobbling LSD and has not become a turkey*"


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE


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Offlinecircastes
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19658200 - 03/06/14 07:20 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

I had this feeling shrooms might be some kind of cure or something for schizophrenia, what I actually found was if you are in a certain state shrooms will catalyse astonishing physiological regeneration including the brain. Schizophrenia is some abnormality in the physiology of the brain and on some level you know about it, where it is, what it's doing, how it can be fixed. If you disintegrate cultural values and understanding which limits what you believe is possible, and allow a biological harmoniousness, and trust your body to itself, it will undergo this regenerative process.

Relying on science alone for our salvation isn't the right approach. Look to abnormal states of consciousness which show all we know to be a mere 'good story' and go off on your own to see what is possible.


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Registered: 12/02/05
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19658208 - 03/06/14 07:28 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

What does relying in science alone even mean?
What do you understand by this?


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Offlineviktor
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Lisergiko]
    #19658239 - 03/06/14 07:58 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Suffering is the state that arises from the division of the false and true selves.

Schizophrenia arises when one becomes aware of this division. It persists until the false self is laid to rest.

That is all.


--------------------
"They consider me insane but I know that I am a hero living under the eyes of the gods."


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: viktor]
    #19658266 - 03/06/14 08:17 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

viktor said:
Suffering is the state that arises from the division of the false and true selves.





I;m not buying that. Can you please elaborate?


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Offlineviktor
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19658431 - 03/06/14 09:59 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

I'd rather you suffered :awesomenod:


--------------------
"They consider me insane but I know that I am a hero living under the eyes of the gods."


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19658626 - 03/06/14 11:26 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

circastes said:
I had this feeling shrooms might be some kind of cure or something for schizophrenia, what I actually found was if you are in a certain state shrooms will catalyse astonishing physiological regeneration including the brain. Schizophrenia is some abnormality in the physiology of the brain and on some level you know about it, where it is, what it's doing, how it can be fixed. If you disintegrate cultural values and understanding which limits what you believe is possible, and allow a biological harmoniousness, and trust your body to itself, it will undergo this regenerative process.

Relying on science alone for our salvation isn't the right approach. Look to abnormal states of consciousness which show all we know to be a mere 'good story' and go off on your own to see what is possible.




I'm amazed at how often you pitch this idea of regeneration still. Id have thought you'd notice aging by now.


--------------------
Being unable to make what is just strong,
we have made what is strong just. -- Pascal

Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: viktor]
    #19658812 - 03/06/14 12:11 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

viktor said:
I'd rather you suffered :awesomenod:




'cuz you can't sustain your bs? funny little boy! :lol:


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Offlineviktor
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19659962 - 03/06/14 06:32 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

:facepalm:


--------------------
"They consider me insane but I know that I am a hero living under the eyes of the gods."


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: viktor]
    #19660140 - 03/06/14 07:24 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)



--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Offlinecircastes
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Kickle]
    #19661299 - 03/07/14 12:40 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Kickle said:
Quote:

circastes said:
I had this feeling shrooms might be some kind of cure or something for schizophrenia, what I actually found was if you are in a certain state shrooms will catalyse astonishing physiological regeneration including the brain. Schizophrenia is some abnormality in the physiology of the brain and on some level you know about it, where it is, what it's doing, how it can be fixed. If you disintegrate cultural values and understanding which limits what you believe is possible, and allow a biological harmoniousness, and trust your body to itself, it will undergo this regenerative process.

Relying on science alone for our salvation isn't the right approach. Look to abnormal states of consciousness which show all we know to be a mere 'good story' and go off on your own to see what is possible.




I'm amazed at how often you pitch this idea of regeneration still. Id have thought you'd notice aging by now.



The lines across my forehead have almost completely disappeared. My psychiatrist and case manager have noticed but they haven't confronted me on it yet. It has been gradual, sometimes quick, a kind of tickle across the skin, used to happen primarily in sleep paralysis and dream like experiences but now is the norm for me during the day.

I used to be a lot older. I also used to be a lot more brain damaged from TBI and schizophrenia.

I wouldn't keep pitching this idea if I didn't think I was right and that other freethinking individuals should know about it.

Take McKenna's position that you have yourself, your mind, your surroundings, your family/friends, the rest is unconfirmable rumor, probably lies. TAKE THIS VERY SERIOUSLY! What are you waiting for? Everyone feels a malaise in their life, everyone wants some adventure, this is why most of us here trip. Well this can be your life. The culture provides you with nothing. Learn to operate the nervous system.


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19662609 - 03/07/14 11:23 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

The problem is that you are the uncomfortable rumor for me.

If you've seen improvements I think its great. Everyone deserves to strive for betterment and in some degree achieve it imo. And while I don't enjoy being a decaying mass of flesh that is hardly a rumor I heard about. It is what I found firsthand. Removing self-inflicted wounds has been my approach since that point. E.g, not bringing excess stress, eating well, exercising, diversifying experience, etc. Not to reverse decay but to live well while I can.

I rarely get sick at this point, even when I sleep in the same bed as someone who is. I do not take this as having reversed sickness, but I have done my part to limit its ability to set in. That means I am healthier now than when I was younger and more stressed. So I could make that into whatever dream I want. I'm not aging, I'm getting healthier right? Nah. I am maturing. Doing less damage to myself, thank goodness.

When I was a young lad I remember being really reckless when skiing. I loved speed and I loved air. It led to a lot of injuries but all minor. One time I landed wrong and the right ski dug straight into the snow. My body kept moving. As I finally came to a stop I could not move. My right leg was what had stopped me. But in that process it had been twisted all the way around. People who saw were disgusted by the sight. Ski patrol came, in tandem lifted my body and leg straight up, and put me on a sled. Everyone thought for sure my leg was broke.

@ the ski patrol hut they found out I was almost completely unharmed. They splinted my leg, told me to keep it elevated, and sent me on my way. I recovered fully in less than a week.

But you know what? As I aged the falls left longer and longer lasting consequences. I wasn't as bendy anymore. So while I developed skills when I was younger and still enjoy catching big air and going fast, I no longer push for more. I've peaked as far as that is concerned. The consequences of bending my leg around on itself now are steep compared to when I was 7 or 8. Now the goal is to fall well, if I'm going to fall. Whereas then it was what limit can I push? That is maturity. That is what keeps me living well.

Is this just a rumor? Its my experience.


--------------------
Being unable to make what is just strong,
we have made what is strong just. -- Pascal

Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: Rahz]
    #19665810 - 03/08/14 02:07 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MushroomTrip said:

Quote:

and I thought I'd could end all of this. The impact of an entheogen trip could possibly "cure" her




No




:thumbup::thumbup:

Do you think you know something that none of the mental health professionals do from 60 years of experimentation (including us vintage Shroomerite mental health professions)? Psychedelics do not "cure" schizophrenia. In a schizophrenic individual the likelihood is that psychedelics will trigger an acute psychotic episode, quite likely resulting in self-injury, injury to others, arrest, incarceration in a psych ward, legal and financial consequences, or worse!. :nono:


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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Offlinecircastes
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #19665988 - 03/08/14 03:14 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

I've got schizophrenia in the family, and I was psychotic for a few years. I take shrooms and I'm fine. :justdontknow:


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19666360 - 03/08/14 06:59 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

circastes said:
I've got schizophrenia in the family, and I was psychotic for a few years. I take shrooms and I'm fine. :justdontknow:




I'm sure that beats the hell out of years of empirical evidence. :rolleyes:


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Offlineviktor
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #19666399 - 03/08/14 07:21 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MarkostheGnostic said:
Do you think you know something that none of the mental health professionals do from 60 years of experimentation (including us vintage Shroomerite mental health professions)?




:whacker:


--------------------
"They consider me insane but I know that I am a hero living under the eyes of the gods."


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Offlinecircastes
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: viktor]
    #19666573 - 03/08/14 09:11 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

There has only been ONE study on psilocybin and schizophrenia, where it exacerbated symptoms. It involved two patients. That's all the empirical evidence there is...

You might find a few shroomerites and other drug boards where people said they got worse when they took drugs. You will also find schizophrenics tripping and saying they're doing fine. Not exactly evidence in either case.

So yeah.

Psychedelics as being psychotomimetic fell out of favour in the scientific community a long time ago.


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE


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Offlineviktor
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19666632 - 03/08/14 09:45 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

The blind are leading the blind on this question.

I don't doubt that the shroomz can put you at peace. What you think when they wear off, of course, is your decision.


--------------------
"They consider me insane but I know that I am a hero living under the eyes of the gods."


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: viktor]
    #19667425 - 03/08/14 02:13 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

viktor said:
Quote:

MarkostheGnostic said:
Do you think you know something that none of the mental health professionals do from 60 years of experimentation (including us vintage Shroomerite mental health professions)?




:whacker:




I usually recline when masturbating. Still, your response is just someone else's animation, which means you've got nothing to say.


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #19667429 - 03/08/14 02:14 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

or to masturbate! :lol:


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19667433 - 03/08/14 02:14 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

circastes said:
I've got schizophrenia in the family, and I was psychotic for a few years. I take shrooms and I'm fine. :justdontknow:




Either you're an anomaly, or you're overdue for a real surprise. I hope it's the former.


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19667477 - 03/08/14 02:23 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MushroomTrip said:
or to masturbate! :lol:




:lol:  I hope nobody around here thinks it would be helpful to dose an unwitting, possibly schizophrenic granny with a psychedelic. :eek: Even a stable but inexperienced person would wig out.


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #19667543 - 03/08/14 02:46 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

It would be a great dark comedy movie idea :wink:


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19667708 - 03/08/14 03:36 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MushroomTrip said:
It would be a great dark comedy movie idea :wink:




'The Grannie: Reloaded.'


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Offlinecircastes
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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #19668529 - 03/08/14 07:15 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

What's there to say a schizophrenic or genetically loaded individual can't take shrooms? There are no studies.


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19668833 - 03/08/14 08:22 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

circastes said:
What's there to say a schizophrenic or genetically loaded individual can't take shrooms? There are no studies.




Perhaps not, but I've known individuals, even diagnosed one myself as schizophrenic, paranoid type, and warned him not to take psychedelics. He didn't listen, had a psychotic break, fired off a shotgun in his uncle's store, and got locked up for a time. He showed up at my house some years ago (like he did as an adolescent), and had just gotten out of jail again. He was decompensated, filthy, and living with a 64 year old crack addict he said. He would've gotten to this disheveled place eventually, but the acid quickened the process it seemed.

I saw 'acid casualties' even in high school (1967-71), and have read enough case studies to be fairly confident that 'ego death' under these circumstances, do not permit blissful transpersonal realms to expand into conscious awareness as much as pre-personal unconscious contents to flood consciousness in an unrelenting torrent, causing psychic overload. I adhere to my own model for categorizing what goes on, and I feel that the model has a good degree of predictive power depending upon anecdotal reports of a pre-psychedelic subject. I mean, preponderance of paranoid ideation is not going to set the mind-set for a good trip.


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #19669425 - 03/08/14 10:45 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Well I'll take some doses in 2 months when our season starts and tell you what happens.  :cookiemonster:

My attitude is basically that of the cookie monster in life.

May even end up living in a trash can at this rate.


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19669748 - 03/08/14 11:55 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

I'll keep my fingers crossed (well, not for 2 months, but you know what I mean).


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #19670676 - 03/09/14 08:21 AM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Honestly, we don't know squat - SQUAT - about what this is. There is no pretension in that statement, if you think it's a kind of phase or an entertaining idea but that we do actually know something, you don't understand and need to reassess.

I'll go around in my life playing computer games, visiting places, taking coffee, but all the while there is this depression that sets in if I'm denying the sheer mystery of all this. It is a consuming experience.

You can of course take this in a superficial way and sort of project some mystery into the world, but this is not what I'm talking about. This is the real deal.

So how can someone like me not have a vested interest in fungi that are said to induce a sacred experience? I don't want to know more, I HAVE to know more. It is becoming my life to explore the sheer unrevealed present, and so psilocybin has my name written all over it. ALL OVER IT.

This is no hedonistic urge, it's a spiritual quest, it's part of who I am, to see deeper into all this.

The risk is nothing compared to all this...


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes]
    #19671252 - 03/09/14 01:26 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

Something I realised a few years back was that I was going to have to put up with being told what my experience was about by people who had no fucking idea at all, but whom had accumulated a lot of knowledge about what it might be from the perspective of people who also had no fucking idea at all.


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: viktor]
    #19671264 - 03/09/14 01:31 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

So, a late bloomer, eh?


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All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19671308 - 03/09/14 01:50 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

You'll have to explain that one, sorry.


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Re: Is my granny a schizophrenic? [Re: circastes] * 1
    #19671436 - 03/09/14 02:28 PM (7 years, 10 months ago)

I respect the quest and I revere The Mystery. The Mystery is ALL that I revere, not doctrines, dogmas, creeds, or formulaic professions of faith. The experiences that result is insight, understanding, unity, and the coveted theological notion of 'assurance' (inner certitude of the eternality of one's Essential Awareness) are collectively referred to as Gnosis. But just like mountaineering, the quest for peak experience is fraught with danger, and for some, there is greater risk of one sort or another. Your's is apparently psychosis. Your post reminds me of the hand-written 'last will and testament' I wrote on the eve of my first LSD trip on Windowpane, (which must have been a solid 300 mcg of very clean acid). I still have that page. It was written after midnight and dated July 1, 1972. That attitude, that I HAVE to Know, has remained with me to the present, even after checking my heightened blood pressure during the height of the trip (my own particular danger is heart attack/stroke).

I support your quest and I am not telling you what to do. Only you can assess the dangers, and if my cardiologist told me not to raise my blood pressure precipitously (another mountain metaphor), I don't know if I'd listen. I tell people that I'd like to trip when I am dying (but how can one be sure when one is within hours of death except for a attending physician's diagnosis?), for which I've saved a couple of vintage sugar cube doses. BUT, dying when it is unexpected while tripping is just a trick on the controlling ego. It actually IS the same thing - tripping while dying and dying while tripping, but it is like voluntarily retiring and getting fired. We seem to desire retirement on the one hand, but when I had my job taken from me, I panicked! Yet here I am, retired, and the panic has passed (fuck you Great God Pan). Perhaps if I die on a trip, the initial panic will subside, and hopefully I will not panic when confronted by the Clear Light of Reality, but embrace it, merge with it as having recognized it as the real me. As for a psychotic break, it is like surviving a heart attack in that it leaves permanent damage. Spiritual seekers can sustain grave injuries, and I wish the both of us good cheer on our respective paths. :peace:


Edited by MarkostheGnostic (03/09/14 02:41 PM)


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