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OfflineTron
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Registered: 09/29/03
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Last seen: 20 years, 7 months
FedEx or UPS?
    #1963624 - 09/29/03 06:03 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

Lets say, hypothetically, i wanted to send someone a quarter pound of portobello mushrooms in the mail, across the states, and these portobello mushrooms might be mistaken for something illegeal. Now, im not about to break the law, but i dont want anyone fucking with/smelling/ or xraying my package of gourmet mushrooms.

Now this may sound like risky buisness, im sure it is, but thats not going to stop me...

Im here to ask my like-minded peers about there experiences in using the mail to send large quantities of portobello mushrooms,

-what precautions you used
-any bad experiences and how to avoid them
-what third party service you used
-how you packaged your exports
-any inside knowledge of the mail scanning system

any wisdom would be greatly appriciated, and
dont tell me im stupid, its risky but completely possible
this is hypothetical

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Invisibleluvdemshrooms
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Tron]
    #1963632 - 09/29/03 06:10 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

It's stupid and risky.


--------------------
You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity. What one person receives without working for another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for that my dear friend is the beginning of the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it. ~ Adrian Rogers

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InvisibleAhab McBathsalts
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Tron]
    #1963731 - 09/29/03 06:43 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

hypothetically, its not worth it.


--------------------
"Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everybody's going to die."

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OfflineSeussA
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Ahab McBathsalts]
    #1963749 - 09/29/03 06:49 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

I know for fact that they have busted people for sending certain hemp plant parts via fedex. I would assume ups is similiar. I hate to be a copy-cat, but LDS said it best:

> It's stupid and risky.


--------------------
Just another spore in the wind.

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OfflineMadtowntripper
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Seuss]
    #1964306 - 09/29/03 10:04 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

Heh. I can tell you right now, its not risky in the LEAST. I work for UPS, at one of the busiest hubs in the country. I *personally* handle over 5000 boxes every day. There isnt an X-ray machine in the whole company, I 100% guarantee it.

Nobody cares what you ship. We get everything from live animals, to plants, to cars. We will ship ANYTHING. If anyone wants to give any REASONS it might be risky, I'll be glad to discount them. I would ship anything UPS in a second. Its probably 10X times safer than driving it across the country yourself. How are they going to find out? You think they're going through your packages? Its a private company. That would be ILLEGAL.


--------------------
After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus

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OfflineTron
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #1964522 - 09/29/03 10:58 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

Thanks Madtowntripper, I know people at UPS and they feel the same way...

For the rest of you...
I know its risky and stupid, i said that, its a federal offense. duh.

Neither Fedex or UPS scan packages with exrays or use dogs. They ship and recieve hundreds of thousands of packages a day. Residential to residential shipments arent suspect for a moment.

I was just wondering if anyone had any suggestion about how i could conduct myself safetly, like for instance

how might i prevent any whiff of smell escaping?
because that seems like the only give away, and with fungus its minimal compared to marijuana...

regardless of the package being found, the only way you can be charged is if your name is on the package or if you sign for it, so my suggestion to anyone trying to ship something illeagal is to sign a fake name to the UPS man and then bounce out your backdoor before you get rolled up on... or sit around whatever

this is all hypothetical and whatnot

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OfflineChiefThunderbong
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Tron]
    #1964986 - 09/30/03 02:06 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

As far as I know, and I believe there was a post on this sometime ago, no drug dogs are trained to smell mushrooms. There are far too many species of mushrooms for dogs to be able to pinpoint the hallucinogenic variety, and I don't think mushrooms are that huge a problem either (although if you read that microgram I think shrooms are gonna be moving up in priority). Now sending marijuana would be a completely different ballgame....I know people who have done it, and gotten away with it, but it's a lot more risky. I think sending mushrooms, acid, or pills would be basically undetectable....I'd use ups personally, I use them for any package I send just cause I have found their service to be the quickest and most reliable.


--------------------
Yeah spinnin' around again
yea caught in a tailspin

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Invisibletheseeker
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Tron]
    #1971551 - 10/02/03 12:16 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

Funny a UPS worker posted here. I work for FedEx Ground and I can tell you first hand - all we care about is getting your package off the belt without hurting our back. If you package your item PROPERLY so that it will not break open when thrown or kicked (the UPS guys do it to, so don't try to tell me different) then you have nothing to worry about. If they're ground up, even less to worry about; personally I'd take this extra step. Just package it safely against moisture and make sure it can take a reasonable beating.

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InvisibleZippoZM
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: theseeker]
    #1971647 - 10/02/03 01:06 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

heres what you do, take the portabellos and put them in a ziploc bag, squeese out the extra air and seal it, now duct tape the entire top, so that no air can get in. now take another bag and put about 4-6 dryer sheets in it and put the mushroom bag in it, squeeze the air out and seal with tape.
now you should have a bag of dryer sheets with a ag of shrooms in it. both taped shut with duct tape.
now get some coffee beans and grind them up, they have to be fresh ground, and put them in a third bag, place the doubble bag inside, squeeze the air out and tape shit.
you will now have 3 layers of protection which won't bust.
then spray the box youll be shippnig with with some nasty ass cologne and ship it off.
also if you realy want to be snezky, from what i remember x-rays cant see through wood, so you could put it in a wood box, or inbetween some decently thick boards, before shipping if you were woried about the x ray thing.



--------------------
PEACE

:mushroom2:zippoz:mushroom2:



"in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption"

"People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."

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OfflineSeussA
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: ZippoZ]
    #1972044 - 10/02/03 06:55 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

> I work for FedEx Ground and I can tell you first hand

We had a story in the local paper here a month or two ago where they busted a FedEx driver for smuggling cannabis. Somebody elsewhere in the world would FedEx a brick to a phony address on his route, which he would then deliver to whoever sells it. They discovered the package somewhere before it got to him and called the police. The DEA replaced the real cannabis with something fake and a tracking device and waited to see where it ended up. When it ended up in the trunk of the deliver guy, they busted him. I don't know if our local paper is large enough to be online or not... I will try to find a url to the story and post it.

Edit: http://www.virginislandsdailynews.com/index.pl/article_home?id=2042716

Quote:


Officers from the High Intensity Drug Task Force and U.S. Customs were notified Wednesday by FedEx in San Juan that a package containing approximately 14 pounds of suspected marijuana had been intercepted, according to police.





--------------------
Just another spore in the wind.

Edited by Seuss (10/02/03 07:01 AM)

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OfflineMadtowntripper
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: theseeker]
    #1972340 - 10/02/03 09:47 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

if you package your item PROPERLY so that it will not break open when thrown or kicked (the UPS guys do it to, so don't try to tell me different)




Hell yeah we do! And if you put a fragile sticker on it, your just ASKING to have it kicked. But yeah, its getting to be a wet time of year, so TAPE your box. As long as it doesnt bust open, I dont care whats inside...Although, be forewarned, if 10 keys of coke fall out, I'm quitting on the spot, and I hope you insured your package.


--------------------
After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus

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OfflineSeussA
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #1972348 - 10/02/03 09:49 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

> Although, be forewarned, if 10 keys of coke fall out, I'm quitting on the spot, and I hope you insured your package.

*laugh*  :lol:


--------------------
Just another spore in the wind.

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Anonymous #1

Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Seuss]
    #1972356 - 10/02/03 09:54 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

n/a

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OfflineMadtowntripper
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: ]
    #1972385 - 10/02/03 10:02 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

You just hate it 'cause *I* work there...

Hater.


--------------------
After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus

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Anonymous #1

Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #1972394 - 10/02/03 10:07 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

n/a

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Invisibletheseeker
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #1972719 - 10/02/03 12:19 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Hell yeah we do! And if you put a fragile sticker on it, your just ASKING to have it kicked. But yeah, its getting to be a wet time of year, so TAPE your box. As long as it doesnt bust open, I dont care whats inside...Although, be forewarned, if 10 keys of coke fall out, I'm quitting on the spot, and I hope you insured your package.



Yeah man, we don't take instructions from goddamn packages!  A little "Please handle with care" goes a long way, it acknowledges that a human being is handling the package so maybe I'll be nice if it looks like someone is thinking.

Oh, and for those writing in cursive, I'm going to throw it as hard as I can into the back of the truck until I have time to figure out what the address says.  High probability of the same for people who use lowercase or obscure abbreviations.

There's a way to have your package not get on the wrong truck, get left at the end of the belt, or smashed by a 50 lb. box of bromide.  Get a printed label in all caps, so the package handler can read it as they're wiping the sweat from their eyes.  If you're really cool, circle the zip code in colored crayon, like green or something not too distracting.  The zip code is how we know what truck it goes on.  Don't worry about the Zip+4, that's strictly a USPS thing.  Oh if you've taken the extra minute to do all this, you're going to be everyone that touches your package's (get your mind out of the gutter) favorite person in the world, which goes a long way to safe package handling. :smile:   

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InvisibleTinMan
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Tron]
    #1972820 - 10/02/03 12:58 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

With FedEX and UPS, you pretty much have 0 mail rights. They could open any packages they please with no reason.

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InvisibleCow Shit Collector
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: TinMan]
    #1973106 - 10/02/03 02:26 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

A friend of mine who works for UPS said they ship ANYTHING. He recalled someone shipping a bear hyde that wasn't even taxadermized, said it reeked of holy hell when it busted open. He also recalled packages smelling strongly of gasoline and they would keep them going to their destination. I took from that, they dont care what the hell you shipping.


--------------------
_______________________________________
CSC


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~Joe Dirt

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OfflineMadtowntripper
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: TinMan]
    #1973221 - 10/02/03 03:03 PM (20 years, 7 months ago)

I've worked here a long time, seen 100's of thousands of packages, and have never seen anyone say "Open that and see whats in there." I guarantee if I did I'd have the police called...Dont spread misinformation. :frown:


--------------------
After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus

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OfflineSeussA
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Re: FedEx or UPS? [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #1975323 - 10/03/03 07:02 AM (20 years, 7 months ago)

> With FedEX and UPS, you pretty much have 0 mail rights. They could open any packages they please with no reason.

> Dont spread misinformation

It isn't misinformation. What he is saying is that in the US only US Postal Mail is protected under the law as Postal Mail. Anything shipped by any other service is not Postal Mail and is not protected under the law the way postal mail is. It is illegal for the US Postal mail carrier to open a package under US law. It is not illegal for a UPS/FedEx carrier to open a package under US law. That isn't to say a UPS/FedEx carrier wouldn't be fired on the spot, but it isn't illegal the way it is with postal mail.


--------------------
Just another spore in the wind.

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