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OfflineHellogoodbyedeath

Registered: 03/24/12
Posts: 2,904
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19626475 - 02/27/14 02:22 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MushroomTrip said:
Why and why?




It was odd. I went to a private Catholic high school in which very many people were sexually active (so much for good ol' Christian principles, huh? :lol:) and for a while, I thought I was missing out on something. And then there was a time where I would place myself above others because I believed I was somehow superior to them for not having given it away so easily.


Edited by Hellogoodbyedeath (02/28/14 07:14 PM)


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OfflineCelestica
Stranger

Registered: 01/06/14
Posts: 63
Last seen: 8 years, 8 months
Re: Virginity [Re: Hellogoodbyedeath]
    #19631778 - 02/28/14 06:31 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Well, Never been proud over it, sometimes when I was about 14-15 i was ashamed and would probably have given it away if I had the possibility quite easy. I was the nerd and everyone kinda knew in a way, so. The hot popular girls in my class kind of hit on me, sometimes sat in my lap, but it was just a bullyish joke and all knew it, including me. Then I lost it  when I was sixteen to my ex-girlfriend and that was that.


--------------------
Currently growing:
Lophophora Williamsii, different variations
Trichocereus Peruvianus
Trichocereus Pachanoi
Trichocereus Bridgesii
Silene Capensis
Acacia Maidenii
Mimosa Hostilis
Lithops, Euphorbias and lots of different non psychoactive Cactus species. Chinese pepper tree. All grown indoors and most are still babies.


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InvisibledeCypher
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Registered: 02/10/08
Posts: 56,232
Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19631790 - 02/28/14 06:35 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MushroomTrip said:
Were you proud of yours when you had it?




Well, before puberty I really didn't care either way.  I thought it was weird how influenced post-puberty humans were by sexual desire, and I remember seeing a porn video back when I was 6 or 7 and just thinking that it was odd--no feelings of revulsion or attraction.  :shrug:

After puberty, however.... I was always more of the nerdy type.  I kept my virginity until I was 17 going on 18, and admittedly I always did feel a bit jealous of the kids who lost their virginity earlier.  But in retrospect, I'm glad I waited till I was ready.  It enabled me to emotionally mature to a better standpoint of being able to handle it, honestly.


--------------------
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
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Re: Virginity [Re: deCypher]
    #19631804 - 02/28/14 06:38 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

It enabled me to emotionally mature to a better standpoint of being able to handle it, honestly.




What do you think the difference would have been in how you handled it, had you lost your virginity earlier?


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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InvisibledeCypher
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Registered: 02/10/08
Posts: 56,232
Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19668237 - 03/08/14 03:58 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

MushroomTrip said:
Quote:

It enabled me to emotionally mature to a better standpoint of being able to handle it, honestly.




What do you think the difference would have been in how you handled it, had you lost your virginity earlier?




Well, perhaps I would have deflated the high level of importance that I (as well as most nerdy, virgin boys) tend to ascribe to the sexual experience.  This might have been a positive thing, but I fear this in turn could have led to increased promiscuity on my part, more one-night stands with minimal emotional attachment, more broken hearts as a result of said one-night stands, increased risk of having to deal with girls freaked out about possible pregnancy, me freaking out about possible STDs, etcetera etc.

That isn't to say that this series of events wouldn't help with character growth, but IMO waiting for as long as I did gave me the opportunity to see the potentially negative repercussions of early sexual exploration/wilful hedonistic abandonment with usual slim care for the consequences (most teenagers in high school don't have fully developed frontal lobes, which is probably why they make rash decisions without even thinking about potential detrimental results).

Overall, perhaps I missed out on some fun times by not losing my virginity earlier, but I don't think I would have been as ready to deal with the smorgasbord of potentially bad things that can issue from said event.  :shrug:  Of course, this hypothetical scenario I just constructed could be utterly wrong, and I could missed my chance to become the Alpha Stud on Campus with two bitches on each arm while my phone blows up constantly with California dimes desperate to blow me.  :pimpslap: :lol:

In reality, however, I'd probably end up getting the first bitch I fuck at, say, 14 pregnant, and with my luck it would turn out that she comes from a really Catholic family who forbids her to get an abortion.  As a result, I now have to take care of a kid I don't even really want, am forced to pay child support for 18 more years, and in general have just now pretty much ruined my life.  So yeah, I'm glad I waited.  High school freshmen are not typically, on the whole, emotionally mature enough to deal with sex and the myriad of issues it can cause IMO.


--------------------
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.


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InvisibleJack yo Self foo
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Registered: 06/28/08
Posts: 3,096
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19668295 - 03/08/14 04:13 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

You don't what you've got till it's gone.

Except when it comes to virginity.


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You learn something new everyday, so be sure you learn something from it.


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InvisiblePenelope_Tree
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19668972 - 03/08/14 07:02 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

I had no sense of value attributed to my virginity, and so I let go it quickly and easily in hopes of fast gains in the pleasure department. Now, I am rather embarrassed at my sexual haste (that continued for another 10 years, also to my current dismay).  I'm finally coming to terms with it after being hit hard and realizing that I emotionally can't (and don't want to) deal with the casualness of my previous M.O. anymore. It also helps me to realize there was a pathological element to it all.


--------------------
full blown human


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Virginity [Re: Penelope_Tree]
    #19672022 - 03/09/14 03:08 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

What was pathological about it?


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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InvisiblePenelope_Tree
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19673676 - 03/09/14 09:42 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

mmm.. that's debatable, sure. I guess the biggest reason is that I look at that period in my life now and am in disbelief of how I lived. I felt gross about myself many times, but sought to ignore/numb/distract myself from what I was doing instead of face the demon and understand it. I would say that a lot of the time I was on autopilot and reacting to/manipulating my environment. Putting myself in a position where I was raped on many different occasions and never thinking I should stop doing that or that it was concerning.. It's just weird and I'm still figuring out if it's something I need/want to talk about with people I let get close to me. The older I get, the more I lean towards "no," yet here I am talking about it, so there's some inconsistency.


--------------------
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InvisibleSalomon
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Registered: 01/17/09
Posts: 25,128
Loc: America, FUCK YEAH Flag
Re: Virginity [Re: Penelope_Tree]
    #19675874 - 03/10/14 12:38 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

never have, quite possibly won't. i'm indifferent to it really:shrug:

but hey i'm pretty quiet and that dosen't make relations with people easy, of any kind, much less sex.

so i suppose it'd be a more personal than casual experience.


i'd rather just hook up electrodes to my nerves and force orgasms with the push of a button


--------------------
EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT



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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Virginity [Re: Penelope_Tree] * 1
    #19676137 - 03/10/14 01:36 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Penelope_Tree said:
Putting myself in a position where I was raped on many different occasions and never thinking I should stop doing that or that it was concerning.. It's just weird and I'm still figuring out if it's something I need/want to talk about with people I let get close to me. The older I get, the more I lean towards "no," yet here I am talking about it, so there's some inconsistency.




Do I understand right that you consider your actions to be rape inviting? Because if this is so, it might just be part of the unprocessed trauma you're dealing with, which often times includes blaming oneself... It is very true we live in a world where some take certain behaviors as an invitation to rape, but that's just the psychopathic fucked-up rapist mentality. Believing in it might harm you just as much as a rape... Maybe this inconsistency in your needs, which you mention here, is still part of a trauma that needs to be addressed and resolved.


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Offlinecircastes
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Registered: 01/14/10
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19676633 - 03/10/14 03:30 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

I was really embarrassed. I'm not even part of the culture that's supposed to be out there, but you seem like a bit of a stupid boy still if you can't even get laid and come into your adulthood as a human being.


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE


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InvisibleTropism
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Registered: 09/12/09
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Re: Virginity [Re: circastes]
    #19676643 - 03/10/14 03:32 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Did that drive you to do it?


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OfflineGrapefruit
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19676835 - 03/10/14 04:18 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

I don't really understand why you'd be proud or ashamed of virginity.


--------------------
Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. 

"Chat your fraff
Chat your fraff
Just chat your fraff
Chat your fraff"


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Virginity [Re: Grapefruit]
    #19676873 - 03/10/14 04:28 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

me either, but there it is


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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InvisiblePenelope_Tree
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Registered: 07/31/09
Posts: 8,535
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19677457 - 03/10/14 06:34 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Yeah, you read me right. I think I also need a different job so that I'm not confronted by these same issues in other people everyday. That quickly becomes emotionally draining. Still figuring out if that's avoidance or simply taking care of myself... I'm leaning towards the latter.


--------------------
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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
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Re: Virginity [Re: Penelope_Tree]
    #19677535 - 03/10/14 06:50 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Avoidance is a method of taking care of yourself, at least until you're ready for facing something. But how did you come to the conclusion that your actions were rape inviting?


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Offlinecircastes
Big Questions Small Head
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Registered: 01/14/10
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Re: Virginity [Re: Tropism]
    #19677621 - 03/10/14 07:05 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Tropism said:
Did that drive you to do it?



Yeah. I'm not even part of the culture and if I met someone that was 23 and a virgin like I was at that age, I'd involuntarily think less of them. It's just how it seems to go, why over think it.

I was mentally ill though, that's why I couldn't talk to chicks or really have interest in sex enough to get laid. In fact it was difficult to maintain boner during that first time.

It really changes what you think about girls / how you approach them. If you've never had your sprinkle inside one you act like a bitch around them.


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE


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InvisiblePenelope_Tree
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Re: Virginity [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #19678099 - 03/10/14 08:23 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

Some philosophical dude once said something like, "If monkeys drank beer and experienced a hangover, they'd never touch beer again. Humans, on the other hand..." If it had only happened one time, I could chalk it up to bad luck, bad person, etc.. but the repeat offenses make it seem as if the problem was primarily my behavior. IDK. I get it - that still doesn't excuse the other party. I just feel stupid and like I contributed to the situation. Glad to be out of that period in my life.


IDK how I went off on this tangent.. Sorry to hijack the thread. :onfire:


--------------------
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Offlineelev8d
Stoner
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Registered: 12/14/13
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Re: Virginity [Re: Penelope_Tree]
    #19678991 - 03/10/14 11:52 PM (9 years, 10 months ago)

I was ashamed before I had lost it. Even in middle school lmao. I finally lost it to someone special, and realized how over hyped it was and it didn't even seem cool at that point-but I think it's good to wait for the right person/til you can hold responsibility, or it's sketchy/awkward


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I can do anything I want and so can you


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