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Anonymous #1

How do I make my farts enjoyable and smell nicer
    #19448442 - 01/20/14 04:21 PM (10 years, 9 days ago)

I did this nasty fart at work. It smelled like a mixture of rotten eggs, dead animals and spoilt fish and I smelled of stale body odour because I hadn't showered in three months. I forgot to shower...I was really busy with college and work. Anyway I was fixing the bulbs when my assistant appeared. He said "hello!" stood under the ladder and held it for me just after I had farted and immediately began sniffing and coughing like he was about to puke or something and mumbled uunder his breathe "OMG" . He looked so disgusted and angry and dreaded that very moment. He excused himself and went to the bathroom obviously to gather his thoughts and inhale fresh air. I didn't expect him to appear so suddenly after I farted. He was so repulsed by my body odour and stinky fart. I think he almost died or puked


Should I wait next time to fart? How do I avoid farting?  How can I make my farts enjoyable and smell better? please help


Edited by Anonymous (01/20/14 04:31 PM)


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Anonymous #2

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #19448455 - 01/20/14 04:24 PM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Nope.. do what you will. He didnt die, did he? Furthermore, there are plenty of people in the world.. wouldnt matter if a few died..


Edited by Anonymous (01/20/14 04:25 PM)


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Anonymous #1

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #19448470 - 01/20/14 04:26 PM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
Nope.. do what you will. He didnt die, did he? Furthermore, there are plenty of people in the world.. wouldnt matter if a few died..



No but he could have died from inhaling vomit or suffocation. It was very humid and stinky in that tiny office room. He looked appalled. The smell must have overwhelmed him. I felt some nausea after smelling it


Edited by Anonymous (01/20/14 04:33 PM)


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Anonymous #3

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #19448582 - 01/20/14 04:51 PM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Get the fart filtering underwear: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/24/fart-filtering-underwear_n_4156400.html

Or become a vegetarian, what makes your farts stink is meat and shit food.


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Anonymous #4

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #19450259 - 01/20/14 10:23 PM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Yeah, broccoli and cabbage farts smell just lovely..


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Anonymous #5

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #19450388 - 01/20/14 10:46 PM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Try to fart in crowed areas or a elevator, defiantly not in a place where it can be blamed on you. Also lay off the vegetables and baked beans.


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Anonymous #2

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #5] * 1
    #19451014 - 01/21/14 01:14 AM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Yeah.. eat canned meat instead... that will smell like death itself..

My advice would be eating things like rocks and grawel.. then your farts will not smell so bad..


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Anonymous #5

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #19451038 - 01/21/14 01:24 AM (10 years, 9 days ago)

How about you shove one of those air fresheners in the back of your underpants or invest in a set of these ?

http://myshreddies.com/


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Anonymous #2

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #19451053 - 01/21/14 01:29 AM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Put some weed in your pants?


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Anonymous #5

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #19451069 - 01/21/14 01:33 AM (10 years, 9 days ago)

Rub some Vegemite on your underwear.


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Anonymous #6

Re: My fart almost killed a man at work [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #19454482 - 01/21/14 07:16 PM (10 years, 8 days ago)

Make a stir fry with LOTS of onion, garlic, and use lots of oil. You see, the potency of the garlic absorbs the smell from your intestinal gas and combined they both work to neutralize each other because of the natural ph of the garlic.


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Anonymous #7

Re: How do I make my farts enjoyable and smell nicer [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #19454881 - 01/21/14 08:57 PM (10 years, 8 days ago)

I think they make underwear that makes your farts either not smell or smell nice.

Also ask a girl how they manage to hold em in all day :wink:


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Anonymous #8

Re: How do I make my farts enjoyable and smell nicer [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #19454899 - 01/21/14 09:01 PM (10 years, 8 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
I did this nasty fart at work. It smelled like a mixture of rotten eggs, dead animals and spoilt fish and I smelled of stale body odour because I hadn't showered in three months. I forgot to shower...I was really busy with college and work. Anyway I was fixing the bulbs when my assistant appeared. He said "hello!" stood under the ladder and held it for me just after I had farted and immediately began sniffing and coughing like he was about to puke or something and mumbled uunder his breathe "OMG" . He looked so disgusted and angry and dreaded that very moment. He excused himself and went to the bathroom obviously to gather his thoughts and inhale fresh air. I didn't expect him to appear so suddenly after I farted. He was so repulsed by my body odour and stinky fart. I think he almost died or puked


Should I wait next time to fart? How do I avoid farting?  How can I make my farts enjoyable and smell better? please help



Eat fabric softener sheets.. They taste like sunshiny days, and

Shit smells like daisies. Every now and then you collapse,s but it's worth it in the end.


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Anonymous #9

Re: How do I make my farts enjoyable and smell nicer [Re: Anonymous #8]
    #19464430 - 01/23/14 07:48 PM (10 years, 6 days ago)

After I eat a lot of spicy mexican food, it always smells interesting.


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Anonymous #10

Re: How do I make my farts enjoyable and smell nicer [Re: Anonymous #9]
    #19464461 - 01/23/14 07:54 PM (10 years, 6 days ago)

Fart filtering undies. Or make some adjustments to your diet


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