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OfflineDeviate
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Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4,497
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
The joy and the pain of living consciously
    #19408390 - 01/12/14 01:33 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

So I have recently gone through a spiritual awakening of sorts. Not enlightenment, I am still very far from enlightened but I am spiritually awake now, I am no longer going through life in a semi conscious trance like most people, just a consumer of entertainment in my spare time.

You'd think this would be a good thing and in many ways it is a good thing. I feel much more alive now, much more present and the world appears much more beautiful. But the downside is that conscious living means confronting all your faults and problems and all the unpleasant truths about life that you've been avoiding and facing them. I am finding this immensely painful and often I find myself missing the days before my awakening when I could simply flip on the TV and forget my problems by entering into a semi conscious trance in front of the tube.

I long for an end to suffering, for true enlightenment and I know that no matter what I do, I will never find true rest until I reach that state. But for now, there doesn't seem to be anything I can do but put up with the pain of being conscious and awake in a world I'd almost rather sleep through.


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Invisiblelessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate] * 2
    #19408413 - 01/12/14 01:40 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

We are the creators of our own joy and suffering


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OfflineHardTrippin
The Ambivalent
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Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: lessismore]
    #19408435 - 01/12/14 01:47 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

Suffering cannot be avoided, all you can do to help it is accept it. I like to project forward to when I am dead. Being fully conscious of your impending death makes it hard to be bugged by much. All there is to do is appreciate the continuous moment that is your existence.


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OfflineDeviate
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Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4,497
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: lessismore]
    #19408512 - 01/12/14 02:06 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

mio said:
We are the creators of our own joy and suffering




Hence the need for self mastery. Becoming more conscious is a step in that direction.


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Invisiblelessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate]
    #19408573 - 01/12/14 02:19 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

I dont need to obtain anything I got everything I need

how can I say I am not conscious of my own consciousness/reality?

only if I believe my thoughts, but in reality I got it all

self mastery is our nature :-)
it is natural to be happy, it is natural to have good overview of thought, it is natural to see nature/everything as having soul/being sacred

as long as we dont do anything against ourselves

if we have done anything against ourselves we must first undo it, learn from mistakes

it seems you are on the path, the only thing you need to is not to worry
and not to regret


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InvisiblezZZz
jesus
I'm a teapot User Gallery

Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate]
    #19408609 - 01/12/14 02:29 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

could true enlightenment mean confronting suffering with the utmost conscience?.. i wonder


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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
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Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate]
    #19408755 - 01/12/14 03:08 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Deviate said:
So I have recently gone through a spiritual awakening of sorts. Not enlightenment, I am still very far from enlightened but I am spiritually awake now, I am no longer going through life in a semi conscious trance like most people, just a consumer of entertainment in my spare time.

You'd think this would be a good thing and in many ways it is a good thing. I feel much more alive now, much more present and the world appears much more beautiful. But the downside is that conscious living means confronting all your faults and problems and all the unpleasant truths about life that you've been avoiding and facing them. I am finding this immensely painful and often I find myself missing the days before my awakening when I could simply flip on the TV and forget my problems by entering into a semi conscious trance in front of the tube.

I long for an end to suffering, for true enlightenment and I know that no matter what I do, I will never find true rest until I reach that state. But for now, there doesn't seem to be anything I can do but put up with the pain of being conscious and awake in a world I'd almost rather sleep through.





I've been awake for a long time. You'll get used to it. You might want to check into nootropics.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


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OfflineDeviate
newbie
Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4,497
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: zZZz]
    #19408782 - 01/12/14 03:14 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

zZZz said:
could true enlightenment mean confronting suffering with the utmost conscience?.. i wonder





Do you mean conscience or consciousness? Either way though, in my opinion the answer would be no. No doubt it is a good practice to confront suffering with full awareness and full acceptance and this can lead to great peace amidst great suffering but in my understanding this is not the same as enlightenment because it's still in the realm of duality. There is you, confronting something else in a certain way. Enlightenment is going beyond duality, so there is no longer anyone that needs to confront suffering in any particular way after enlightenment, suffering just happens.

And maybe this is why enlightenment can be said to be the end of suffering. There is no longer anyone left to suffer. The body can still feel pain and the mind can still feel sadness but to the enlightened person, these things only appear as images in an ocean of bliss and they don't appear for anyone, so when you add the immense bliss of enlightenment combined with the fact that there is no one left to suffer, suffering ceases to exist or at least ceases to have any power.

Of course that's all just speculation because I am not enlightened yet. If I become enlightened I will let you know how it actually is.


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Invisiblelessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate]
    #19409247 - 01/12/14 05:15 PM (10 years, 18 days ago)

The path cannot be read/philosophized it can only be walked

it is possible to walk the path of the enlightened if you try your best to do the right thing always
the way is in the heart

enlightenment is probably never reached, life is learning

I used to know a few Christians who sailed on a ship, missionaries, to try and spread the message of God with gospel/worship songs on guitar etc.
they didnt have any problems, and their love radiated to everyone around them

if always trying ones best that is the best one can do

surrender, either to God, or to the divine in all
that is a pretty nice way to live without suffering, live in gods name i.e.
cant see how it would be possible to be unhappy then, unless the people around you are
but then you would try to make them happy

the choice is yours ultimately

I prefer to call it awakened

if you know truth, you must live the truth

but no textbook shall dictate my life,
I just follow the truth that I know, do what I love
maybe read the bible when I get old, because I realize there is a lot of truth in it...

100% in control of my own life, unhappiness is self created, that is being awake for me


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InvisibleSleepwalker
Overshoes

Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: lessismore]
    #19411321 - 01/13/14 05:53 AM (10 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

mio said:
I used to know a few Christians who sailed on a ship, missionaries, to try and spread the message of God with gospel/worship songs on guitar etc.
they didnt have any problems




Excuse my skepticism.


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OfflineFishOilTheKid
Ascended
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Registered: 11/14/10
Posts: 5,401
Last seen: 2 days, 36 minutes
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #19411444 - 01/13/14 07:16 AM (10 years, 18 days ago)

:lol:

Quote:

I long for an end to suffering, for true enlightenment and I know that no matter what I do, I will never find true rest until I reach that state.




So is 'true enlightenment' the end to suffering then?

To me the word itself refers to the light of Truth.

Enlightenment to me more involves entering into space with the demons and angels of Christianity.  Baphomet.  The function of deity if you can call them one/it.

To me that is awakening.  You are awakened to another level of reality.  You have become enlightened in a way.  One with the representatives of the teachings.  The spirits.

So as for rest...??  They have no need for sleep and they are not human.  This kind of enlightenment through the use of psychs and dare I say Jesus and Lucifer is exhausting because you become a host to an invasion of your perceived sovereignty.


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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Male


Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #19411685 - 01/13/14 09:13 AM (10 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Sleepwalker said:
Quote:

mio said:
I used to know a few Christians who sailed on a ship, missionaries, to try and spread the message of God with gospel/worship songs on guitar etc.
they didnt have any problems




Excuse my skepticism.




--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


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InvisibleChronic7
Registered: 05/08/04
Posts: 13,679
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate]
    #19411914 - 01/13/14 10:50 AM (10 years, 18 days ago)

I used to think I missed being able to watch crap on TV, but I really didn't, I just thought I did

Sitting in silence, disinterested in everything, I would think 'this is boring' but it wasn't, i just thought it was

Beyond these thoughts is Silence, which is never boring, as it's beyond time


--------------------


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OfflineSse
Saṃsāra

Registered: 12/28/12
Posts: 2,769
Loc: Interdependent Co-arising
Last seen: 6 years, 8 months
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate]
    #19412074 - 01/13/14 11:36 AM (10 years, 18 days ago)

fookin concepts :heart:

grows with virtue:skillful, beneficial, wholesome, self-compassionate

suffering is a virtue
patience is a virtue
compassion/self-love is a virtue
acceptance is a virtue
equanimity is a virtue

no idea

Erase me



"something that I dreamed of"


--------------------
"Springs of water welling from the fire"

"Life may seem to flee in a moment, but when the mind is freed of the veil of ignorance, and illusion that comes between the mind and the truth, life and death are only opposite sides of the same coin - "water welling from the fire."


"Within us, we carry the world of no-birth and no-death. But we never touch it, because we live only with our notions."
-Thich Nhat Hanh
instant
"Experience always goes beyond ideas"


Edited by Sse (01/13/14 02:13 PM)


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OfflineSse
Saṃsāra

Registered: 12/28/12
Posts: 2,769
Loc: Interdependent Co-arising
Last seen: 6 years, 8 months
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Sse]
    #19412503 - 01/13/14 01:41 PM (10 years, 17 days ago)

"we need the mud to grow the lotus" - thich nhat hanh


Nature's way


--------------------
"Springs of water welling from the fire"

"Life may seem to flee in a moment, but when the mind is freed of the veil of ignorance, and illusion that comes between the mind and the truth, life and death are only opposite sides of the same coin - "water welling from the fire."


"Within us, we carry the world of no-birth and no-death. But we never touch it, because we live only with our notions."
-Thich Nhat Hanh
instant
"Experience always goes beyond ideas"


Edited by Sse (01/13/14 02:46 PM)


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Invisibler72rock
Maybe so. Maybe not.
Male


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 01/06/09
Posts: 1,327
Loc: Chicago Flag
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate] * 1
    #19413224 - 01/13/14 04:40 PM (10 years, 17 days ago)

Quote:

Deviate said:
I long for an end to suffering, for true enlightenment and I know that no matter what I do, I will never find true rest until I reach that state. But for now, there doesn't seem to be anything I can do but put up with the pain of being conscious and awake in a world I'd almost rather sleep through.




I think this longing for an end to all suffering is what creates the most suffering from my experience. YMMV


--------------------
Current favorite candy: Peanut Butter Kisses


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OfflineDeviate
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Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4,497
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: r72rock]
    #19414213 - 01/13/14 08:16 PM (10 years, 17 days ago)

Enlightenment is the realization that there is nothing to get worked up about and seeking enlightenment is getting all worked up about the need to realize there is nothing to get worked up about.


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InvisibleForest Sprite
fuck you
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Registered: 01/12/14
Posts: 817
Loc: asdf
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Deviate]
    #19414332 - 01/13/14 08:37 PM (10 years, 17 days ago)

"The little flower knew that in order to grow she had to be dropped in dirt, covered in darkness, and struggle to reach the light." -can't remember where this quote is from but I always remembered it because it relates to everyone's spiritual path.

I don't use the word enlightenment anymore. I used to, but then I became enlightened. Just kidding... I can't stand when someone says they're enlightened. Anyway.. I think everyone who tries to live more consciously is going to experience periods of extreme happiness but also times of sadness and pain. We can't unsee the things we've come to learn about humanity and the world and ourselves.

For me personally, I go through cycles I guess. Like I'll just kinda go into a semi-conscious state for a while, if you wanna call it that. Where I'll just not meditate at all, I eat junk food all the time, I don't exercise, etc... just basically not living up to what I know I can. And it saddens me since I know I can do much better

Then there are the better times, when I get back into meditation, eating healthy, exercising, ceasing or limiting pot usage which is otherwise sky high and makes me more contempt with being in shitty situations.

Right now I'm in one of my lazy, semi-conscious cycles. Work has just been fucking with me (nighshift) and my whole body is out of balance and I'm just kinda in a haze right now. I'll get out of it eventually tho and get on top of things.

I notice that when I stop smoking pot that I am more able to live in alignment with my goals and whatnot and everything falls into place. Not blaming pot. I'm just a weirdo


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Invisiblelessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Forest Sprite]
    #19414728 - 01/13/14 09:58 PM (10 years, 17 days ago)

Cycles of happiness and sadness is bipolar :wink:

no suffering with acceptance

too bad we have to learn acceptance over and over again all our lives

thought create suffering said Buddha

everything is what we think it is, think positively

acceptance and action (learn from mistakes)

btw I quit pot too long ago, I dont regret, dont want to go back, dont miss it
my mood got much better after quitting it, better in control of my thoughts/actions too
would never smoke everyday again, dont even like the taste anymore
I do what I love, and I didnt love smoking pot/cigs everyday ;-)


Edited by lessismore (01/13/14 10:11 PM)


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OfflineDeviate
newbie
Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4,497
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: The joy and the pain of living consciously [Re: Forest Sprite]
    #19414931 - 01/13/14 10:41 PM (10 years, 17 days ago)

Quote:

Forest Sprite said:
"The little flower knew that in order to grow she had to be dropped in dirt, covered in darkness, and struggle to reach the light." -can't remember where this quote is from but I always remembered it because it relates to everyone's spiritual path.

I don't use the word enlightenment anymore. I used to, but then I became enlightened. Just kidding... I can't stand when someone says they're enlightened. Anyway.. I think everyone who tries to live more consciously is going to experience periods of extreme happiness but also times of sadness and pain. We can't unsee the things we've come to learn about humanity and the world and ourselves.

For me personally, I go through cycles I guess. Like I'll just kinda go into a semi-conscious state for a while, if you wanna call it that. Where I'll just not meditate at all, I eat junk food all the time, I don't exercise, etc... just basically not living up to what I know I can. And it saddens me since I know I can do much better

Then there are the better times, when I get back into meditation, eating healthy, exercising, ceasing or limiting pot usage which is otherwise sky high and makes me more contempt with being in shitty situations.

Right now I'm in one of my lazy, semi-conscious cycles. Work has just been fucking with me (nighshift) and my whole body is out of balance and I'm just kinda in a haze right now. I'll get out of it eventually tho and get on top of things.

I notice that when I stop smoking pot that I am more able to live in alignment with my goals and whatnot and everything falls into place. Not blaming pot. I'm just a weirdo




For me it is the opposite, only by smoking pot am I able to live in allignment with my goals. I have evolved beyond the need for it now but it used to be that I just had no motivation to do my sadhana (spiritual practcie). It seemed like it would be years before I got any results and so rather than work hard for years with very little reward, I would constantly give into temptation and for an instant gratification type endeavor.

Now, when I would the cannabis bud all this would instantly change. Suddenly my attention would turn inward, on meself and instantly I would realize that seeking happiness, through the aquisition of things was useless. I would see that there was bliss (ananda) deep within me and sometimes while high on marijuana I would feel large amounts of bliss flowing through me. These experiences lead me to keep on seeking happiness within me even after sobering up from the marijuana plant. Of course I would often lose motivation again but then I would simply smoke more of the marijuana plant and then I would instantly get drawn within again. After a while I no longer needed the marijuana plant to focus inward. I find it sad and unfortunate that so few other marijuana users seem to experience this phenomenon.

What exactly do you do after you smoke your marijuana plant? Not only does this inward focusing I am speaking of lead to spiritual awakening but it also greatly improves the enjoyability of the high that can be obtained from the marijuana plant. States of pure ecstasy can be reached fairly easily when one knows how to meditate in conjunction with the effects of the marijuana plant. So if you truly want to enjoy your marijuana plant, I encourage you to learn how to focus your attention while you are stoned/high. In my opinion cannabis is the greatest drug to ever make an appearance on the face of the earth.


Edited by Deviate (01/13/14 10:44 PM)


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