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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: stratocast]
#21799653 - 06/12/15 09:19 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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What does blue balls feel like?
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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Psychonautica
Cuddly Wuddly Fuccboi


Registered: 04/20/15
Posts: 10,854
Loc: Free Soul & IISkuNkII
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Bitter Cactus]
#21799662 - 06/12/15 09:22 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Bitter Cactus said: What does blue balls feel like?
Quote:
Bitter Cactus said: What does blue balls
-------------------- The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one 3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother. Sheekle said: yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica

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memes
Blessed



Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 27,785
Loc: In a Tree
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Psilosopherr]
#21799705 - 06/12/15 09:33 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
lifeiswhatyoumake said: So, I have major blue balls. What do I do???? I don't want to jack it. I don't want to have sex with this girl yet, either. How can I get the pain of blue balls to go away another way?

Quote:
rbalzer said: I'm having the same fucking problem.
All I want to do is ask my ex if she wants to have sex. But I also don't want to be rude to her.
I'm so desperate I made a craigslist ad. I know your pain
no, rblazer. you're thirsty.
OP has blue balls.
the latter is a physically painful sensation. a literal, painful, miserable experience. i had a girl give them to me once in HS and once in college. my god, i wish taht on no one. gotta rub one out. just gotta get that nut
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occollegeboi
MushroomSpaceGod



Registered: 04/10/11
Posts: 2,857
Last seen: 5 years, 4 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: memes]
#21800170 - 06/12/15 11:38 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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You need to just jack off and RELEASE it. God gave you hands for a reason, to jack yourself off when you get too horny to handle it. A man needs to bust a few times a week or he will EXPLODE. After you jack off you will be horny again in a day or two. Jacking off and cumming helps you to stay focused and it is mentally healthy.
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Psychonautica
Cuddly Wuddly Fuccboi


Registered: 04/20/15
Posts: 10,854
Loc: Free Soul & IISkuNkII
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: occollegeboi] 1
#21800460 - 06/13/15 01:39 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Do this,
Fast forward to three minutes
-------------------- The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one 3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother. Sheekle said: yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica

Edited by Psychonautica (06/13/15 01:41 AM)
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Detached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 14 days
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Psychonautica]
#21800574 - 06/13/15 02:51 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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... remember ladies... you're actually losing weight while you suck his dick.. 
She makes some very frightening sounds while swallowing that fake cock...
Edited by Detached (06/13/15 02:52 AM)
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Psychonautica
Cuddly Wuddly Fuccboi


Registered: 04/20/15
Posts: 10,854
Loc: Free Soul & IISkuNkII
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Detached]
#21800604 - 06/13/15 03:09 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Detached said: ... remember ladies... you're actually losing weight while you suck his dick.. 
She makes some very frightening sounds while swallowing that fake cock...
That's the best part, you could use those sounds as effects in a horror game.
If a bitch made those noises on my dick I'll either laughjaculate, or laugh my boner away
-------------------- The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one 3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother. Sheekle said: yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica

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Enjoywho
Rags to Bitches



Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Detached]
#21800635 - 06/13/15 03:28 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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You got your own spot? You know how to semi cook?
Just ask a girl hey I got a real comfy bed and I'll cook for you. We can watch a movie (which the 3 girls I've already had slide through in a week I've had my new place) we never even started the movie. 
I've just started being incredibly up front. The last girl I fucked we started kissing and I didn't even take her clothes off. Oh is that how it is. Ya Know Why your here. Let's not play games.
So easy loving it.
-------------------- "I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." "In the days of kings and queens I was a jester." "And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies "Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"
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Enjoywho
Rags to Bitches



Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Enjoywho]
#21800642 - 06/13/15 03:31 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Take your clothes off. Oh your a demanding boy I like that. They know why they're sliding through. Trust me they want it just as much. Sex is fun.
-------------------- "I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." "In the days of kings and queens I was a jester." "And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies "Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"
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r00tuuu123
Now I'm just really piseed



Registered: 04/20/12
Posts: 8,507
Loc: I'll be there in a minute
Last seen: 7 years, 10 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Enjoywho]
#21800721 - 06/13/15 04:20 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Op slam your nutsack in the bathroom door then you'll have black and blue balls and maybe a bit of red if you do it hard enough.
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Please report me to a Mod for hurting your punk ass hippie feelings And all time Champion thread killer.
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Psychonautica
Cuddly Wuddly Fuccboi


Registered: 04/20/15
Posts: 10,854
Loc: Free Soul & IISkuNkII
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: r00tuuu123]
#21800731 - 06/13/15 04:27 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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For OP since you don't want to fap. Prostate Orgasms!
Quote:
1. Prep For It
Anytime butt play is involved, it’s important to take the right precautions. Things have a tendency of getting messy when this region of the body is involved, but an easy routine can help sexual participants avoid embarrassing incidents. For the man looking to achieve a prostate-assisted orgasm, douching is probably a good idea. The process flushes your body of all junk so you don’t have to worry about it coming out during sex. It wouldn’t hurt to follow up with a shower.
The penetrator should also take some polite measures to maximize his or her partner’s experience. The skin around the anus is sensitive, and can tear easily, so trim nails, and clean hands are a must. Couples may want to arm themselves with paper towels, and rubber gloves (for those who aren’t fluid-bonded with their partners).
2. Lube Up, Warm Up
Unlike a vagina, the anus isn’t designed for penetration. So lots of lube is welcome, and should be continuously applied throughout your rendezvous. For those who aren’t accustomed to being penetrated, a little warmup can go a long way. Prepare your partner for penetration by grazing the butt cheeks, stroking the shaft and massaging the anus (which is loaded with as many nerve endings as your erogenous zones). Other notoriously sensual areas are the nipples and the ears, but everyone is different. The best way to figure out where your partner wants to be caressed is by asking.
3. Diamonds are a Guy’s Best Friend: Finding Your Target
Finding the prostate may be a bit of a puzzle for those who haven’t done it before. But it’s not so hard. Because the prostate swells when aroused, it’s best to start the process when already aroused. The prostate can be located externally via the perineum (the diamond-shaped area between the scrotum and the anus). It’s possible for your partner to reach orgasm simply by applying pressure to the area and administering a generous massage. But for those who prefer a more direct approach, penetration is the way to go. The prostate is located about two inches below the rectum toward the scrotum. After inserting a finger (or two if you’re feeling comfortable) you should feel a chestnut-sized ball. Moving the finger(s) in a “come hither” motion toward his navel can stimulate the prostate to the point of orgasm.
4. Use Your Muscles
We’ve all heard of Kegels, but what most people don’t realize is that both sexes can benefit from this kind of exercise. The Pubococcygeus (PC) muscles not only help men maintain control over urination and blood flow to the penis, but can help them during orgasm as well. Much like the female G-spot orgasm, prostate-assisted orgasms are achieved and maintained through a series of muscle contractions, so strengthening this area is key. There are a bunch of different ways you can help do this, but one of the most effective seems to be clenching your butt cheeks and anus (we all know how to hold in a fart, right?). The more control you have over these muscles the longer your orgasm can last.
5. Don’t Forget About The Toys!
Sure, it’s great to have a partner who can lend a hand (literally). But there’s a whole market for people who go at it solo. The Aneros Progasm Prostate Massager seems to be leading the way when it comes to prostate-assisted orgasms. The Aneros is a relatively small (3.5 inches), wavy-shaped device that users can easily insert into the anus. It comes equipped with a finger loop for easy removal and a “p-tab” that nestles up against the perineum for extra pleasure. By clenching their butt cheeks, users pivot the device forward, allowing for contact with the prostate. When the muscles relax, the device reverts back to its stationary position. This stroking motion is what stimulates the “p-spot” and allows for hands-free, toe-curling orgasms. And you don’t have to sto
-------------------- The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one 3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother. Sheekle said: yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica

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r00tuuu123
Now I'm just really piseed



Registered: 04/20/12
Posts: 8,507
Loc: I'll be there in a minute
Last seen: 7 years, 10 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Psychonautica]
#21800765 - 06/13/15 04:45 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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So if I jam my fist up your ass and use your dick as a pastry bag to write Happy Birthday on a cake then Ive done my part?
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Please report me to a Mod for hurting your punk ass hippie feelings And all time Champion thread killer.
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Psychonautica
Cuddly Wuddly Fuccboi


Registered: 04/20/15
Posts: 10,854
Loc: Free Soul & IISkuNkII
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: r00tuuu123]
#21800782 - 06/13/15 04:51 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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I'm not the one who doesn't want to jack off, you'd have to ask OP
-------------------- The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one 3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother. Sheekle said: yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica

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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Psychonautica]
#21803466 - 06/13/15 06:49 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Do your balls get swollen or turn blue when you get blue balls? Does blue balls physically/ emotionally hurt?
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Bitter Cactus]
#21803483 - 06/13/15 06:53 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Mine have never turned blue but that shit hurts like an ice pick in your knee cap. It makes you act different too. I almost tried to seal the deal with some random milf in the grocery store because she looked at me and then didnt look away. She wanted THIS DICK!!
..but I punked out.
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Orange clock, pencil "They threw me off the hay truck about noon..."
*Mark 15:34  Gam zeh ya’avor...
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Bitter Cactus]
#21803488 - 06/13/15 06:55 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Have you seriously not gotten so sexually excited that your balls started to hurt? Either you get laid swiftly or you aren't as passionate as you should be.
It takes about two to four hours of strong erotic excitement for me to get blueballs.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Amanita86]
#21803489 - 06/13/15 06:55 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Do your balls ever just explode once they get to a certain point?
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Bitter Cactus]
#21803496 - 06/13/15 06:58 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Naa you'll usually catch a wet dream before that happens, but it really does feel like someone punched you in the sack and you get stomach aches etc.. bad news.
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Orange clock, pencil "They threw me off the hay truck about noon..."
*Mark 15:34  Gam zeh ya’avor...
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Psychonautica
Cuddly Wuddly Fuccboi


Registered: 04/20/15
Posts: 10,854
Loc: Free Soul & IISkuNkII
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Amanita86]
#21803506 - 06/13/15 07:00 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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It makes my kidneys hurt too. Like basically all the feelings you get from being kicked in the nuts, only they don't go away.
Also if you've ever had to urinate so bad, your lower back and kidneys and shit start to hurt that's what it feels like.
Like someone putting your balls in a vice and tightening the vice more and more, slowly.
-------------------- The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one 3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother. Sheekle said: yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica

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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: I have a serious case of blue balls [Re: Amanita86]
#21803510 - 06/13/15 07:01 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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What is preventing you from just fapping and blowing your load?
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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