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OfflineLUCYINTHESKYY
Stranger
Registered: 01/10/14
Posts: 4
Last seen: 4 years, 6 months
HAS LSD SENT ME DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE FOR GOOD
    #19398816 - 01/10/14 12:34 PM (10 years, 1 month ago)

Hello new to the shroomery and just made an account for this post.
Im going to go into depth of the last few years of my life and how lsd has impacted me,
Im 16 from london and have experimented with, LSD, ketamine, mdma, pills, salvia, mushrooms, weed, ritalin, 2ce and 2ci.

I've always been interested in substances and have also respected them and never taken them too fuck me up, I was brought up in a stable home although my parents did split up.
From the age of 14 I was experimenting with mdma and was very eager to try acid, one night in the summer i went to a psytrance free party in london, I took a pill and half a tab of acid. At the time I was around 15, the trip lasted a good 25 hours and was extremely intense people mutating into down syndromes there were some really heavy visuals. When me and my friend went back to mine he stopped tripping and went to sleep, this really freaked me out and intensified my trip, I then panicked and started searching up how long acid trips were supposed to last and convinced myself I was in a permanent trip and turning skits, the next morning when I woke up sane I was very grateful.

That experience really scared me and showed me the full powers of psychedelics but nothing could prepare me for what was to come....
the next few years went very down hill for me, I was doing surprisingly well at school with (10A*s) and hopefully heading to uni but I got kicked out of my house for drug relate issues and had to move into my dads. This was a very dark time for me, I turned against my parents and was extremely emotionally closed up and confused, I moved back into my mums house and was weekly going to free party's (squat party's) where I was taking mdma, ketamine, NOS and smoking weed but steering clear of psychedelics.

A few months ago I was round a friends house who had ordered a shroom growing kit, we was going to take the shrooms but we both vouched for acid instead seen as they seemed very bruised. That night I took a Hoffman tab and my two friends took 2 each as well, we decided to stay out all night and trip in London city, visiting places like Soho and tower bridge. When the acid started to kick in, I started feeling very excited with the visual ls coming on, but for some reason I felt like the trip was not going to get any more intense so dropped another tab. Within an hour I was tripping so hard that I could nt even talk and all i could see where large blobs of colour and my friends all took on very cartoon characteristics. This was the point in the night when I started thinking my two friends were talking about me, I began thinking they'd told the police id taken acid and then everywhere I looked police cars started appearing, I believed this so much that I even threw away some K which I had in my bag. As the morning approached I still had nt spoken to my friends and they were growing increasingly concerned of me, whenever they started saying 'I think hes loosing it' my trip intensified X100 and It was as if everything went matrix slow and I could nt feel my arms or legs.

We then went back to my friends house and once again they all stopped tripping but my trip was showing no signs of stopping, it had been 15 hours since I dropped the last tab and I was still definitely peaking. My mum had text me as Id been gone for a few days, this made me try to slow down my trip but it did the complete opposite. There were points when I would be sitting there and having no idea what to do with myself, I had no recollection of what I do normally when Im chilling then id stand up and forgot I stood up and just fall over so i started punching myself in the face convinced id gone crazy (I later discovered this was an ego death) This trip lasted a good 26 hours but the next day I returned to sanity.

This was a good 6 months ago and since then I've touched nothing at all, I believe that day really scarred me and i often find myself sitting in my room loosing touch with reality, At this point in time im extremely emotionally unstable and believe I may have a personality disorder. The thought of psychosis and schizophrenia send shivers down my spine and when I read symptoms I feel as if my brain convinces myself I have some of these symptoms, I felt like I've lost grip with reality Im failing to build meaningful relationships with others and am constantly trying to gain attention from others.

Sorry for the long post but felt like I really needed to get this off my chest, dont really know whats going on tbh, hopefully its a phase that Ill grow out of but Im getting worried I may have some sort of mental or personality disorder, thoughts?


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InvisibleJvells
Unity
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Registered: 11/05/09
Posts: 3,031
Loc: East coast Flag
Re: HAS LSD SENT ME DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE FOR GOOD [Re: LUCYINTHESKYY]
    #19398872 - 01/10/14 12:46 PM (10 years, 1 month ago)

No you're not, I had the same shit happen to me. In high school i was obsessed with psychedelics and my friends didn't know jack shit about them but always seemed interested so I'd let them try small amounts...anyways i would do high doses because I knew they were extremely safe but them seeing me so far out would get worried and ruin my trip ending with us both sharing those negative vibes after a little while and then I would feel as if I actually was losing it. You said you haven't took anything since right? Here's what worked for me, take a low dose of L...a hit just to remind you and show you that ultimately it's YOUR consciousness to control and not the drugs. Once you realize this you'll want more again and will be right back on your old travels except with newfound knowledge.

It's one of the first hurdles you have to jump over when you start tripping, you have to push past what fiction and what's not. Sure MAYBE some people will go psychotic but I feel that if you treat them with respect they won't harm you much at all...and if they do it'll only benefit you later on. In a year or two you might read this post again and laugh at yourself much like I have. Relax, you only gain control of your conscious by telling yourself you have control. Exactly like how the more you smile and tell yourself you're happy the happier you are, it's all about self control and just DOING IT. Stop letting your thoughts battle and just tell yourself "NO, I AM HAPPY" end of story and move on or else it'll only get worse. It's your minds natural response to strange chemicals and vibes, " ARE YOU SURE YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO ME??" haha.

Try that low dose of L though if you feel up to it:heart: much love brother


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InvisibleModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
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Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
Re: HAS LSD SENT ME DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE FOR GOOD [Re: LUCYINTHESKYY]
    #19398873 - 01/10/14 12:46 PM (10 years, 1 month ago)

you may very well be schiz. Go see a psychiatrist


--------------------
Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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OfflinepsilocybinjunkieM
relaxin
Male

Registered: 03/17/01
Posts: 14,532
Last seen: 1 day, 29 minutes
Re: HAS LSD SENT ME DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE FOR GOOD [Re: LUCYINTHESKYY]
    #19398936 - 01/10/14 12:46 PM (10 years, 1 month ago)

This thread has been closed.

Reason:
See this is why children shouldn't do drugs/psychedelics. This is an 18 and over forum, so i'm locking this. User had an intense trip and is just giving it entirely too much though. Wither way I hope he gets over it, but this is an 18 and over site so...


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