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Anonymous #1
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was she cheating? *DELETED*
#19357897 - 01/02/14 10:56 AM (10 years, 29 days ago) |
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Post deleted by AnonymousReason for deletion: Doesn't matter now
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Anonymous #2
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Could text her ex and say "So <your gf's name> told me yal have been hanging out" and see what he says. This could come back on you, if they really aren't hanging out, and he tells her. But short of just blind trust, there's not much more you can really do at this point.
Only thing I could think to do that doesn't involve straight up confronting her or stalking her, both of which I don't really recommend.
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Anonymous #1
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Yeah Idk if I want to do that. I feel like if she actually did cheat she would deny them hanging out then message him right after. She would message him either way so I feel like it's a lose lose situation.should I just ask why she was googling stds? Should I ask if she cheated on me then tell her why I might think that? Cause I'm going to her house probably in a couple hours and I want to at least say something. It also socks cause my new years resolution was to quit cigarettes. Bought a pack last night and have been chain smoking. I've never felt so much in security and anxiety/stress in a long time :/ felt I was just going up and up hill till last night.
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Anonymous #1
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Feel like the universe is just fu cking with me
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Anonymous #3
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Why would you want to be with a girl you can't trust. Liars are liars man, if she's already lied about screwing the guy, who's to say she wouldn't again. I'd find a girl that you don't gotta worry about, this stressin out over girls is a young man's game.
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Anonymous #4
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Yeah you both sound kinda crazy, not to be rude.
Dump her do your own thing go to school, work, eat breakfast and just do yo own thang. You're young, kid. Do you want your dick to fall off?
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Anonymous #5
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Look man, half the women around a lyres. Don't let it bother you; it's their way of caring for your feelings. If you dump her for lying then you're just setting your future self up for a world of disappointment. Don't tell her you looked through her messages. Only insecure people do that. You're going to have to work on that by the way. Start talking to other women, not through text, but in person, and openly. Act like it's no big deal, they're ordinary friends, and while being in a relationship that's all they should be.
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Anonymous #6
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Anonymous #7
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Damn this is a difficult situation. You could trust her and possibly let her get away with the cheating, or you could choose not to trust her and accuse her of something. If you do the latter, all trust is gone immediately whether she did something or not. I did this with an ex who I later found out never did cheat on me, but it just killed the relationship
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Anonymous #8
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Here's what you do:
Hang out with her, act as if all is cool.
When she least expects it, look her square in the eyes and ask if she has ever cheated on you. This is important, because it might not be him that she's worried about getting the STD from.
You will see everything you need to know in her eyes, for about 2 seconds before she gains conscious composure and responds verbally.
An innocent person will have upset or angry eyes, in that case explain to her that you saw the STD thing on her phone and yadda yadda yadda.
A guilty person will have sorrowful or shocked eyes. In that case, walk the fuck out and don't talk to her again. Break up via text. Don't trust anything that she tells you.
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Anonymous #9
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You want some real advice? Don't beat around the bush. Don't play games and have her guess what's wrong. Don't draw it out. Lay out your cards and be a man about it. You have reasonable suspicion. Don't do anything drastic. Don't stalk her don't ask around and text him.
Here's where she fucked up. Why would she google that std thing? If she was your first, she wouldn't have to worry about kind of stuff because you would be clean. The only reason for her to be looking up information like that AT ALL would be because she is double dippin'.
Just talk to her. Why hasn't anyone given this advice in the first place????
JUST TALK TO HER!!! What's the worst that could happen? You find out? You already know dude. Don't drag it on and bet all your sheckles on the one pony you know is going to lose. You'll end up hurting yourself more in the long run.
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Anonymous #5
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Quote:
Anonymous #9 said: Here's where she fucked up. Why would she google that std thing? If she was your first, she wouldn't have to worry about kind of stuff because you would be clean. The only reason for her to be looking up information like that AT ALL would be because she is double dippin'
This isn't really true. People get confused easily with all the information out there, some of it contradicting. I for example have predominant ectopic sebaceous glands on my penis due to acne when i was teen. Back then i was a virgin, i had no idea what the fuck they were. I was very self conscious and concerned about having sex because i thought i'd somehow contracted herpes from a public toilet seat or something. Thank fuck i was seeing a dermatologist at the time about my acne, and had the guts to ask him about my cock. It was so awkward, getting out my penis for a man, and a person i didn't know. It was a big relief though when he told me what i had was normal.
Point is, people easily get confused when they don't know what their facing. A girl with thrush for the first time could easily think she'd caught something some how. I'm not saying the girl hasn't cheated, i'm just saying that we are only hearing the story from the Op's point of view, and that there could be unknown details that give the girl perfectly good reason. As wyatt woodsmall once said. 'we all only see life through our own lenses'.
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Anonymous #10
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You dated a girl for 3 years and had sex 2 times??? 
Dump this bitch and find a girl that will fuck, this one is a waste of time.
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Anonymous #9
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Quote:
Anonymous #5 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #9 said: Here's where she fucked up. Why would she google that std thing? If she was your first, she wouldn't have to worry about kind of stuff because you would be clean. The only reason for her to be looking up information like that AT ALL would be because she is double dippin'
This isn't really true. People get confused easily with all the information out there, some of it contradicting. I for example have predominant ectopic sebaceous glands on my penis due to acne when i was teen. Back then i was a virgin, i had no idea what the fuck they were. I was very self conscious and concerned about having sex because i thought i'd somehow contracted herpes from a public toilet seat or something. Thank fuck i was seeing a dermatologist at the time about my acne, and had the guts to ask him about my cock. It was so awkward, getting out my penis for a man, and a person i didn't know. It was a big relief though when he told me what i had was normal.
Point is, people easily get confused when they don't know what their facing. A girl with thrush for the first time could easily think she'd caught something some how. I'm not saying the girl hasn't cheated, i'm just saying that we are only hearing the story from the Op's point of view, and that there could be unknown details that give the girl perfectly good reason. As wyatt woodsmall once said. 'we all only see life through our own lenses'.
You're right. Certain things from OPs story really stuck out and I sort of just jumped to conclusion. It happens though especially when I'm going off a few paragraphs I had the same thing going on with those sebaceous glands as well as a few penile papules. Freaked me out as a teenager. Reading over parts of it again, she does seem very inexperienced and possibly misinformed.
Either way, I think you should talk to her. Talking is the best solution.
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Anonymous #11
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Quote:
Anonymous #10 said: You dated a girl for 3 years and had sex 2 times??? 
Dump this bitch and find a girl that will fuck, this one is a waste of time.
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Anonymous #12
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: i told her -i saw you added your ex on facebook. id rather you not talk to him too often but i'm ok with you adding him.
attempting to control who someone else talks to is a dick move. you may have a cheating girlfriend, but she also has a paranoid, controlling boyfriend. neither of those is any bueno.
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Anonymous #13
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I'm just going to only read the title, and tell you that its 91% percent chance you're seeing it what it is but your fragile heart doesn't want to believe it, in hopes that a story with clear (not to the readers, but you know what I'm talking about) hints that she possibly wasn't cheating will be picked up by stupid people with lack of experience on this topic/people who want to tell you what you want to hear.
9% chance actual paranoia from insecurities and fear of losing her.
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Anonymous #5
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85% of people will believe anything told to them as long as it's put in the form of a statistic.
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Anonymous #13
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95% of the people I this forum have mental issues mainly consisting of social disorders, also a large number of posters are lacking in knowledge on the social net (not Facebook) where they are not connected to what people they would call "normal" causing them to have off the wall thoughts that are unrealistic, some of these people will have a high self awareness, and know this, which in my book makes them not strange, but a perso with strange characteristics. Its the people who are way out there as don't realize it I don't like very much.
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Anonymous #5
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What the fuck is 'the social net'?
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Anonymous #13
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A network of people for a social standpoint that is global, where common/popular beliefs are in the middle, and some people do not have access to it, because it is only for the mentally strong and attractive. Sometimes attractiveness can be traded with other traight the middle net would seem worthy.
Its something I made up but know for fact is real. It makes sense trust me.
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Anonymous #10
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Quote:
Anonymous #13 said: 95% of the people I this forum have mental issues mainly consisting of social disorders, also a large number of posters are lacking in knowledge on the social net (not Facebook) where they are not connected to what people they would call "normal" causing them to have off the wall thoughts that are unrealistic, some of these people will have a high self awareness, and know this, which in my book makes them not strange, but a perso with strange characteristics. Its the people who are way out there as don't realize it I don't like very much.
Is English your first language?
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Anonymous #13
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No sleep 3 days iphone laggy yeah. Either way you should be able to read it dude.
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Anonymous #5
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@Anon 13, i find all this very interesting. it sounds to me like you're referring to commonalities, not so much with interests, but more so with confidence and insecurities. People with similar insecurities often find each other and become friends. I don't know about you, but i remember when i was a teenager at school and i used to look at all the 'cool kids' and think to my self, 'they're all the same, i don't want to ever be like that, i want to be different to everyone else.' Last year i begun studying many different psychological concepts and learnt a great deal indeed. Amongst all of it i had quite an epiphany. I realised that back when i was at secondary school, i was lumping everyone together as 'the same'; and by doing that and rebelling, trying to be different, i was in fact being like the majority of the other people there and becoming 'the same'. I've changed my views on lots of social related topics since then, and it's amazing, how since accepting that all the 'popular kids' i used to go to school with aren't 'all the same', now when i see them at pubs ect, i talk with them, and i can identify how each one is different in some way, and appreciate them for the person that they are. Amongst all this there are definite social trends. The people whom dress up, in a 'non-standard' way, such as gothic, are usually very insecure, but are trying to hide it. They dress up like that to show they're different in hopes that people will acknowledge and respect them for having the guts to be 'who they want to be', and 'don't care what others think'.
I think most people just want to be accepted rather than do the accepting. Since i've begun doing the accepting though, my life has been getting better and better. I think i get what you mean by 'social net'.
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Anonymous #11
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Quote:
Anonymous #13 said: 95% of the people I this forum have mental issues mainly consisting of social disorders
More than 7.5% (one in thirteen, to be exact) of the posters in this thread up to this point are talking out of their ass.
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Anonymous #9
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Don't listen to all this squabblin quack quack bullshit between anons. JUST TALK TO HER AND TELL HER THAT YOU'RE SUSPICIOUS AND VALIDATE YOUR REASONS WHY!
All these lame-'s posting back and forth about separate issues like youtube trolls are getting off topic. Just talk to her dude.
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Anonymous #5
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Quote:
Anonymous #9 said: Don't listen to all this squabblin quack quack bullshit between anons. JUST TALK TO HER AND TELL HER THAT YOU'RE SUSPICIOUS AND VALIDATE YOUR REASONS WHY!
All these lame-'s posting back and forth about separate issues like youtube trolls are getting off topic. Just talk to her dude.
OP hasn't replied since making my original post, or yours might i add. If people have something interesting to say, i will ask them to expand on it while waiting for OP.
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Anonymous #11
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OP, I'll give you the straight goods:
If you don't trust her now, you'll probably never trust her again. Best for both of you to move on.
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Anonymous #14
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Quote:
Anonymous #10 said: You dated a girl for 3 years and had sex 2 times??? 
Dump this bitch and find a girl that will fuck, this one is a waste of time.
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Anonymous #15
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Quote:
Anonymous #13 said: No sleep 3 days iphone laggy yeah. Either way you should be able to read it dude.
I can read it just fine, and I'm sure the other guy can too. That's not the issue.
"Is English your first language" was a perfectly valid question. You are not exactly making sense. Maybe some of the stuff you said makes a lot more sense, with more data. But you didn't provide enough data for it to make sense.
Quote:
Anonymous #13 said: I'm just going to only read the title, and tell you that its 91% percent chance you're seeing it what it is but your fragile heart doesn't want to believe it, in hopes that a story with clear (not to the readers, but you know what I'm talking about) hints that she possibly wasn't cheating will be picked up by stupid people with lack of experience on this topic/people who want to tell you what you want to hear.
9% chance actual paranoia from insecurities and fear of losing her.
Quote:
Anonymous #13 said: 95% of the people I this forum have mental issues mainly consisting of social disorders, also a large number of posters are lacking in knowledge on the social net (not Facebook) where they are not connected to what people they would call "normal" causing them to have off the wall thoughts that are unrealistic, some of these people will have a high self awareness, and know this, which in my book makes them not strange, but a perso with strange characteristics. Its the people who are way out there as don't realize it I don't like very much.
Quote:
Anonymous #13 said: A network of people for a social standpoint that is global, where common/popular beliefs are in the middle, and some people do not have access to it, because it is only for the mentally strong and attractive. Sometimes attractiveness can be traded with other traight the middle net would seem worthy.
Its something I made up but know for fact is real. It makes sense trust me.
lol..wut?
(especially that last one)
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Anonymous #13
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Ok so English isn't my first language because I didn't provide Proof of data that I said was my opinion?
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