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TrentBoyett
Aspiring Mycologist



Registered: 11/29/12
Posts: 16,000
Loc: Kazakhstan
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: drkkenny]
#19342034 - 12/29/13 03:12 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
drkkenny said: I once walked in on my girlfriend talking about this before I had sex with her for the first time. She suspected that I was a virginal character, seeing that I just got back from church an hour before I met her, and saw her get approached by someoen asking her if she was going to play golf later. Which she wasn't because she had to catch a train to see a puppet show. A puppet show where the actors didn't use puppets. We also had a picnic. Though we went later. My friend said we could go to another picnicnext week. For we just returned ffrom London and wanted to install a picnic.
they didn't think I realized they were talking about my virginity but I knew it. Everyone knew it, but it wasn't true, I was actually quite skilled in bed. Whenever I went to bed with a girl they would ask all my friends if they ever had sex with me because they thought some traces of my previous masterly sex maneuvers would still be intact in their own methods of sexual penetration & enable them to derive double the amount of pleasure previous known from other men.
For every woman I ever slept with always remarked that I was far more enjoyable sexual companion than majority of most people. They actually said I gave her the most pleasure she ever could fathom, that I delivered her with atleast twice the pleasure her other boyfriends gave her.
Then all her friends began to ask her if she would allow them the chance to sleep with me, but she never woudl accept their requests & hogged me all to herself. Once they caught us right as I inserted my private part into her ******. Her eyes appeared to apprehend the moment it entered inside her & was positively repulsed, for she let out a shriek that was made on a much higher note than usual.
Good read. +1
So do you still believe in god? or are you agnostic or something?
IMO you seem like someone who would be agnostic or something similar.
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drkkenny
Explorer

Registered: 10/13/11
Posts: 1,440
Loc: Down a well
Last seen: 5 years, 9 months
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle] 4
#19342053 - 12/29/13 03:16 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Well I used to go to church atleast 4 times a week. We would get around in a circle & pray for a better tomorrow. Some of the other church goers would throw out all the bibles before the ceremonies started, so that when we got inside we wouldn't have a book to go along with the preaches sermon.
But they sent those kids back to Cuba where they didn't leave for 9 years & were ptu inside mental asylums to punish them for their vulgar behaviorMy brother just returned from an asylum in London, but it was built in 1902, not 1904 like it was documented. Noone knows why they told people it was made in tht year instead of the other.
They just made us into the church last May though, and we were going over there t o find someone bring us back to France. For we knew someone with a party that was about to happen. It was that moment where yo uknew a party would open somewhere but not know exactly where. For you might call a friend & ask them to quit playing golf & decide to just find a party with us already.
The church I used to go to is now demolished. They destroyed it and built a new one across the st. It was celebrated in town as the one natural monument of the world. It was praised worldwide for being one of the most respectable places to pray, a place where everyone woudl gather to rejoice in gods glory he hath endowed to the lower beings to enable them to taste divine justice, to allow them to see the light & come to the good side. For the devil may try to trick you into submitting into his games but he shall be stopped by the benevolent lord who promised sanctification, the devil is trying to put evilinto your head but he shall present him from accomplishing such feats, for once you take the lord hand in with yours you find early purification & glory established to your name. You find yoursel relieved of former worries & now feel you are flying towards the promised land, the place of your rebirth, the place where many other gods have been resurrected just like ye have, for they might zap some sort of lightning bolt from a cloud to suddenly awakene someone as if electrifying them to ensure that they are alert after the bolt strikes them down.
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No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry They Washed Away // No More Stories, The World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Let's Wash Away. God 2 read 10932148 Unread messages
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NWlight
Just look


Registered: 01/12/10
Posts: 18,686
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: drkkenny] 2
#19342070 - 12/29/13 03:17 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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How the fuck did you type that in 4 minutes
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FruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: NWlight]
#19342082 - 12/29/13 03:20 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
NWlight said: How the fuck did you type that in 4 minutes
HAHAHAHAHA
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drkkenny
Explorer

Registered: 10/13/11
Posts: 1,440
Loc: Down a well
Last seen: 5 years, 9 months
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: NWlight]
#19342086 - 12/29/13 03:21 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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I just decide to make it and I do. You can't wait for the moment to pas you, you have to go out and take it. You won't let it fall from you but you grip on to it so it can't leave you, you understand? I won't leave something alone & I have that thing fully there you know? I just like t okeep it there so I can get it done quicker. Some people wait awhile before doing something but not me, I always say you have to lunge at whatever opportunities are presented your way.
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No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry They Washed Away // No More Stories, The World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Let's Wash Away. God 2 read 10932148 Unread messages
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,406
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 2 hours, 53 minutes
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: NWlight]
#19342089 - 12/29/13 03:22 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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3 people is not an orgy. 4 people is an orgy. I guess they don't teach shit in kindergarten anymore.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: koods]
#19342126 - 12/29/13 03:28 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
koods said: 3 people is not an orgy. 4 people is an orgy. I guess they don't teach shit in kindergarten anymore.
Three girls + NWlight = four people
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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TrentBoyett
Aspiring Mycologist



Registered: 11/29/12
Posts: 16,000
Loc: Kazakhstan
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: drkkenny]
#19342135 - 12/29/13 03:30 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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@drkkenny 4 times a week? That's rough man. IMO organized religion blows...
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drkkenny
Explorer

Registered: 10/13/11
Posts: 1,440
Loc: Down a well
Last seen: 5 years, 9 months
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Its more of how I feel in the church, the surroundings make me appreciate life more. I can feel myself being raised to exalted heights never before seen, feel myself becoming someone far greater than anyone I ever been before.
When I first arrive in the church I will pause at the door & close my eyes as if deeply taking in the environment, as if fillingup my body with some holy substance the gods have delivered to me.
My body will feel as if it has been lifted to the stars, that I am flying towards a distant planet where billions of goods & charms await me. I can feel that wherever I'm goingis going to bring me far more delight than I could ever imagine, and I know I'm about to go somewhere I will never forget. For we might find ourselves creating stars, we find we can make a star appear in front of us. Or we find in our back pocket a star and wehold it up and it brightens our surroundings, so much luminous light just appears without any warning, just like a light revealings it source to brighten up the entire world, as if christmas came early thisyear.
For some lights may light up a cold planet, and the old cold planet with no life will suddenly be blooming with activity. The old planet will extinguish while this one will radiate its powerful source, presenting itself to other distant planets so they catch ablaze too. For only when we are last reminded of our indifference do we truly find ourselves prepared to live fully, to celebrate withlife instead of going therough zombie.
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No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry They Washed Away // No More Stories, The World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Let's Wash Away. God 2 read 10932148 Unread messages
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 22,518
Loc: Mod not God
Last seen: 1 year, 6 months
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: drkkenny]
#19342263 - 12/29/13 03:56 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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I think I would remember the exact number if it was three or four women.
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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TrentBoyett
Aspiring Mycologist



Registered: 11/29/12
Posts: 16,000
Loc: Kazakhstan
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Rose]
#19342284 - 12/29/13 04:00 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Cervantes said: I think I would remember the exact number if it was three or four women.
CERVANTES CERVANTES CERVANTES
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kr0nik0
Ole' Salty


Registered: 02/13/12
Posts: 17,756
Loc: Western Slope, CO
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: koods]
#19342330 - 12/29/13 04:13 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Cervantes said: I think I would remember the exact number if it was three or four women.
IKR?
I had a 3 some a long time ago in HS. If an extra girl just "slid" in there, I would definitely remember lol.
Quote:
koods said: 3 people is not an orgy. 4 people is an orgy. I guess they don't teach shit in kindergarten anymore.
I always thought 5 was the minimum. Threesome, Foursome, Orgy...
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“[...]the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes “Awww!”
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle]
#19342354 - 12/29/13 04:18 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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TrentBoyett
Aspiring Mycologist



Registered: 11/29/12
Posts: 16,000
Loc: Kazakhstan
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle]
#19342360 - 12/29/13 04:20 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Sheekle said: ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
I wack off even less than that, sometimes I go weeks without even thinking about it.
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,406
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 2 hours, 53 minutes
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle]
#19342375 - 12/29/13 04:24 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Sheekle said: ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
Just saw this on CNN
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Legend
RIP Sasha



Registered: 03/29/10
Posts: 28,336
Loc: TX
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle]
#19342382 - 12/29/13 04:26 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Sheekle said: i never fuqd any1 b4
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No sympathy for the devil, keep that in mind. [url=]Buy the ticket, take the ride. [/url]Are you lost?
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle]
#19342398 - 12/29/13 04:30 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Sheekle said: ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
Think I perform 2-4 masturbations a day
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T-Rex




Registered: 04/05/08
Posts: 4,185
Loc: NY
Last seen: 1 month, 2 days
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle]
#19342462 - 12/29/13 04:45 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Sheekle said: ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
THATS HAWT
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claraclairvoyant
well oiled machine



Registered: 05/24/09
Posts: 7,802
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: Sheekle]
#19342464 - 12/29/13 04:46 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Sheekle said: ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
you say 'only' but i consider that a pretty healthy amount.
why you never fuqd sheekle?
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,406
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 2 hours, 53 minutes
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Re: i never fuqd any1 b4 [Re: T-Rex]
#19342486 - 12/29/13 04:49 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
TrentBoyett said:
Quote:
Sheekle said: ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
I wack off even less than that, sometimes I go weeks without even thinking about it.
That sounds like total bullshit. I kinda assumed you had your dick out most of the time you're posting here. 
Quote:
T-Rex said:
Quote:
Sheekle said: ATTN EVERYBODY I ONLY JACK OFF LIKE 2-4 TIMES A WEEK
THATS HAWT
It's hawt that it gets you hawt.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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