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Anonymous #1
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Getting out of the Game *DELETED*
#19335491 - 12/28/13 03:49 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Post deleted by AnonymousReason for deletion: Nobody cares
Edited by Anonymous (12/28/13 06:24 AM)
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Anonymous #1
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Alas! I'm even a failure at cries for attention
To Wordy? Boring? Self-involved? Lousy sense of humor?
Oh well. Guess journals were made for lonely souls like us.
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Jack yo Self foo
The Artful Dodger



Registered: 06/28/08
Posts: 3,096
Loc: Where the red fern grows....
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k
-------------------- You learn something new everyday, so be sure you learn something from it.
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Icyus
KavitārkikasiṃHa



Registered: 11/07/13
Posts: 3,502
Loc: Inbetween.
Last seen: 8 years, 27 days
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Dont kill yourself for not withstanding pain.. it will haunt you...kill yourself for fun, it will haunt you... (not recommending you kill yourself.. it will bring you only suffering..)
now, what can I help you with?
-------------------- And thus begins the reverse-fusing of our one-dimentional understanding, and adds ever-expanding perspectives, in depth and number; splitting our perception, and in so doing, seemingly irrationally, creates yet more one-ness, with all that ever was, is and will ever be, streching across the infinite, inunderstood concept of everything, percievable and not.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: Icyus]
#19337204 - 12/28/13 01:59 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Naw I ain't killin myself like that. Was possibly rollin the dice sotospeak, and I wanted someone to talk about my problems with. I usually break down this time of year so no biggie.
I ok with pain, unless you count that empty and alone feeling. That gets to me and it sucks when the only people who will answer me are people I shouldn't be around. Luckily I got family, but sometimes it's hard to talk to them.
Like I said I'll probably take this to a journal, I know what I need to do and there's no need to trouble you fine folks with my mess of a life.
Thank you for responding though, might seem small but it helps.
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Icyus
KavitārkikasiṃHa



Registered: 11/07/13
Posts: 3,502
Loc: Inbetween.
Last seen: 8 years, 27 days
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If people are to listen to thers jabber and whining, they must do it out of empathy, and not being forced into it so to speak, or the whiner will directly suck out their energy...
That empty and alone feeling is enlightenment... one just has to accept it.. find peace in it...
-------------------- And thus begins the reverse-fusing of our one-dimentional understanding, and adds ever-expanding perspectives, in depth and number; splitting our perception, and in so doing, seemingly irrationally, creates yet more one-ness, with all that ever was, is and will ever be, streching across the infinite, inunderstood concept of everything, percievable and not.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: Icyus]
#19337772 - 12/28/13 04:50 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Yeah well sorry for going off the rails and rambling on. I try not to do it too often. I was looking for some advice on how to handle some negative friends I have right now, I'm having a hard time getting away from them. Basically I am a pushover and a sucker. I know all about having my energy stolen. I got caught up in the details anyway, which is gonna really complicate people's understanding of things.
Thats part of the problem too, the enlightenment thing. I'm having a really hard time with the fact that things are never going to be "better". Thank you for the sentiment though, there is at least some peace in awareness, or I'm at least partially aware, or something.
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Op if you want someone to vibe with ya feel free to message me. 
A lot of folk here care about you. Don't delete posts because we are slow to respond.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: cez]
#19341072 - 12/29/13 11:10 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Well thank you. I think I know that. It was basically a huge ramble about how high I was alongside saying how bad I gotta quit. I deleted it because it was embarrassing and I didn't see it going anywhere productive. If I really needed immediate help I wouldn't come here, was just being needy.
I'm getting my shit together tho. It's really a positive thing. May need some help figuring out life without drugs, but I'm gonna worry about kicking first, which I know how to do.
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Jack yo Self foo
The Artful Dodger



Registered: 06/28/08
Posts: 3,096
Loc: Where the red fern grows....
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: cez]
#19348213 - 12/30/13 07:47 PM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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not everyone sees the path in front of them...you see it and that is all you need
a change of scenery is what you need maybe...how to go about that?
that is part of the adventure you have ahead of you
-------------------- You learn something new everyday, so be sure you learn something from it.
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Hell yah
Fuck what anyone tells you. Do what you want cause once you get old and tied down it'll be more difficult to do what you want.
Be young n dumb
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Icyus
KavitārkikasiṃHa



Registered: 11/07/13
Posts: 3,502
Loc: Inbetween.
Last seen: 8 years, 27 days
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: cez]
#19349515 - 12/31/13 01:05 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Well.. Quote:
cez said: Hell yah
Fuck what anyone tells you. Do .... Be ...
-------------------- And thus begins the reverse-fusing of our one-dimentional understanding, and adds ever-expanding perspectives, in depth and number; splitting our perception, and in so doing, seemingly irrationally, creates yet more one-ness, with all that ever was, is and will ever be, streching across the infinite, inunderstood concept of everything, percievable and not.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: Icyus]
#19349567 - 12/31/13 01:31 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Yeah well I'm gonna do it right this time. I'm gonna make something of myself and you all are gonna be so proud of me.
I figure I should give myself at least a year or two to learn how to take pleasure in healthier things though. Might as well be working and biding my time until then. I may try some program type shit even just to distract me. Whenever I get off opiates I tend to just pick up drinking as soon as my stomach can tolerate it, I want to avoid that and be able to chill with tea and work on my art/music in my spare time to relax.
The weird thing about opiate withdrawals, is if you are in a new and novel environment, even pretty bad withdrawals can be hardly noticable. Like if you trip or take a stimulant sometimes you just stop noticing how bad you feel and can enjoy things. It is important not to get stuck in patterns of self loathing. Getting back into the world is like swimming in cold water, at some point you gotta take the plunge. You will never really get used to it until you dunk yo head.
I wish I could take my own advice. Everybody wants to be comfortable sometimes, right?
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Yup.
Take things one day at a time. Adopt the way of nature, practice patience. Forgive others and yourself often. Believe in yourself and your goals. You are you're own worst enemy and best friend.
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Icyus
KavitārkikasiṃHa



Registered: 11/07/13
Posts: 3,502
Loc: Inbetween.
Last seen: 8 years, 27 days
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: cez]
#19349690 - 12/31/13 02:29 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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If you are able to move... painting and drawing ect.. gives fine results when in pain..
-------------------- And thus begins the reverse-fusing of our one-dimentional understanding, and adds ever-expanding perspectives, in depth and number; splitting our perception, and in so doing, seemingly irrationally, creates yet more one-ness, with all that ever was, is and will ever be, streching across the infinite, inunderstood concept of everything, percievable and not.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Getting out of the Game [Re: Icyus]
#19349763 - 12/31/13 03:08 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Well I am not totally sick, doing a quick suboxone taper. Been drinking and blazing all day, but you know I am sick cause I haven't had one cigarette all day. I went and bought some, then didn't smoke any. I just have no taste at all for tobacco in w/d. Nicotine is ok, just can't stand tobacco. It is like going back to that first drag of a cigarette.
I don't tend to paint or draw when I can't focus real well. I probably should learn to, I don't see why not. I do play music/sing when I am really in agony.
And I never really have a problem moving the impossible thing is to be still.
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