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Whitewater



Registered: 11/02/09
Posts: 500
Loc: Midwest
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
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Bad Acid Trip
#19296794 - 12/19/13 06:44 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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It finally happened, I had a bad time with LSD.
Extremely uncomfortable trip, I don't even know how to describe what I experienced but I guess I'll give it a shot.
The dose was low, first off, which really surprised me. I'm thankful I didn't get thrown into this mindset on a higher dose. I had taken one tab out of a batch I have been using fairly frequently. These blotters weren't very strong, one of them would be an easy to manage public dose. I could go to a park, bar, or museum on one no problem.
On this particular night, everyone had left my town for break, it was really quiet, and it was snowy. I was bored, working on some thesis edits and drinking some wine. I had no real obligations for the next 24 hours so I decided I would take one of the tabs of acid.
As soon as I could feel the acid kick in I realized something wasn't right. Maybe I was fighting it from the beginning but my mindset was fine; I didn't understand why I began feeling horribly uneasy.
As the trip built in strength things went downhill really fast. This was NOT a strong trip. I was not confused, or delusional. This trip was almost 100% emotional. Or lacking emotion.
As the trip progressed I started feeling more and more numb, to every emotion I've ever known. There was absolutely no love to be found anywhere. I felt progressively more disconnected from my own humanity. I could not feel love for anything, and therefore were unable to be loved or cared for. I honestly felt like I broke a critical part of myself that made me human.
I was in agony. It was an existential crisis, a "dark night of the soul" type experience.
I know you all have had crazy intense high dose acid trips. In comparison my relatively tame trip of emotional turmoil doesn't sound too bad, but I can't express how awful it really was. Worst experience of my entire life. I wouldn't wish that feeling on anybody.
I found it so odd, LSD has always been beautiful, full of love and light. I guess everybody who likes to explore these states of mind will see the dark side someday. I actually found the experience very interesting, in a weird way.
I remained as rational as I could, the drug would wear off, and I'll probably return to normal. All I could do was endure. I don't subscribe to any particular religion, but the buddhist quote "life is suffering" made a lot of sense to me. I was experiencing suffering in a very pure form.
Sure enough, the drug wore off. I fell asleep. By late the next day I felt back to normal.
Really far out experience, never expected something so bleak from LSD. I'm gonna take a break from acid for a few months, I might take a couple low shroom doses a little after new years and see where that takes me.
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dpomalia
Strange


Registered: 11/06/13
Posts: 986
Last seen: 8 years, 16 days
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Well in my opinion it sounds like quick growth into full appreciation for emotions. When thinking about happy you understand that there would be no happy without sad. This is one scale above that in void of all emotion even heart break would be optimal and I've never thought of it that way Thanks for sharein sorry about ur time
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Aopocetx
Writer



Registered: 03/20/06
Posts: 2,421
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: Bad Acid Trip [Re: dpomalia]
#19296953 - 12/19/13 07:50 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Do you think it might have anything to do with the fact that you took it simply as a way to kill boredom?
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lessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
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Re: Bad Acid Trip [Re: Aopocetx]
#19296965 - 12/19/13 07:55 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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It shows us who we are inside
so don't expect love and light all the time :-)
expect nothing
I have had 1 bad trip out of 150 trips or so of high doses of LSD but several really bad mushroom trips
mind is all, so it depends on how grounded we are when we go in I never close my eyes in trips anymore, I like to observe nature in trips i.e. and listen to psytrance
no bad trips this way, not even on extreme doses no thoughts for 10 hours, then suddenly 1 thought maybe typical LSD thought
"Our bodies are a reflection of our state of mind Our soul is the most holy gift we have and our bodies we should appreciate
We should be grateful everyday, for all the small things in life that bring happiness and for ourselves and for others" - LSD
so I know my state of mind to some degree by looking at my body if it is healthy the mind is too usually, and reverse
houseplants,pets,psytrance,walk in nature, every trip, no bad trips :-) has been some months since I've last tripped LSD, can't even remember how long ago, but it is usually always nice, never regretted yet
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Absent Minded



Registered: 04/13/12
Posts: 3,300
Loc: Way Down South
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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Very interesting. Though I've never had an outright BAD trip on L, I have had one or two occasions on my last trip where things were starting to get a little weird, but quickly changed that with a change of scenery and by keeping moving.
--------------------
Beats More Beats sheekle: fuck peace love and unity sheekle: death despair and misery sheekle: is where it's at
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Whitewater



Registered: 11/02/09
Posts: 500
Loc: Midwest
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
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Re: Bad Acid Trip [Re: Aopocetx]
#19297130 - 12/19/13 08:58 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
dpomalia said: Well in my opinion it sounds like quick growth into full appreciation for emotions. When thinking about happy you understand that there would be no happy without sad. This is one scale above that in void of all emotion even heart break would be optimal and I've never thought of it that way Thanks for sharein sorry about ur time
Thanks, yea I'm fine now. I actually feel like the experiences has had a positive effect on the way I react to people emotionally. I feel warmer towards others, but that may just be my gratitude towards feeling like a human being again.
Quote:
Aopocetx said: Do you think it might have anything to do with the fact that you took it simply as a way to kill boredom?
Obviously that's a possibility, but I've always found my most profound and life changing trips have been recreational in intent. When I was younger I had a more "spiritual" outlook on these drugs, but I found it often led to minor delusions because the psychedelic experience tends to either reinforce any pre-existing belief structures, or destroy those belief structures entirely. If the former occurs you'll just end up deeper down the rabbit hole, I've seen it happen many times. I've found recreational trips to be great because once you ingest the substance, either something profound happens or it doesn't. If the intention was recreational there's no disappointment in a trip spent contemplating the mundane. However, if the substance invokes a mystical feeling in the midst of an already fun trip, more power to ya.
My opinion of course, perhaps I have been to relaxed with my dosing

Mio- thanks for the reply, I appreciate your words. LSD was my favorite, and still is. I just understand it a little more fully.
Absent Minded- same man, it really took me by surprise.
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nicechrisman
Interdimensional space wizard



Registered: 11/07/03
Posts: 33,241
Last seen: 4 years, 6 months
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I hope you gained something from the experience. I've never had an experience like that with LSD, but can relate with some of my mushroom trips. I think those ones have actually been very useful in putting me in touch with aspects of myself that are best acknowledged rather than swept under the rug.
-------------------- "Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent: it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not." John C. Lily
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lessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
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btw existential crisis,delusional etc. in your report I think you put too much thought into everything maybe, I just like to trip without reading trip reports without expecting to be delusional or spiritual :-)
trip to trip, or trip for the love
when I trip I usually take 3 hits of average hits to overwhelm the analytical mind then just experience
it is often much easier to let go with higher dose for me
it seems your "set" might have been a bit many thoughts, try a walk in nature/meditate first and maybe not trip on a day you have worked so much with your thoughts I prefer to set aside a day+few next days for a trip, so I trip fridays when I got nothing to do
bad trips often teach exactly what you need to know, like previous poster said or so it is with mushrooms for me, taught me that I shouldn't be tripping at the time got 3 bad mushroom trips in a row, even though spaced weeks apart so I took a 6-8 month break, they were bad enough for me that I had to do that :-) almost scared me off mushrooms
trips amplify emotions/state of mind for me not necessarily beliefs trips do anything for me, I don't think I've had too many delusions yet, but maybe I haven't figured that out yet ;-) I just use what fits my own experience, then it seems to be useable
if I am happy I will usually be too in the trip if I don't have a stressed mind, it won't be in the trip either usually
but if I had hidden something from my mind or been very stressed the past week, it will show itself in the trip
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KingKnowledge
Around



Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 2,876
Loc: East Coast
Last seen: 4 years, 6 months
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I've only had one "bad" experience with L, even though I'm not sure if it was bad exactly...
It was my first time taking it alone too. There was a point where I was just too deep. I was promising myself I'd never take drugs again when this was over.
annnnnnd now I'm back wanting to trip
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lessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
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the only bad with acid for me is dying
after a while you learn to accept death ;-) although it isn't easy always, the I always wants to hang on
omg im dying, fake lsd, omg,I cant think, losing consciousness,...wtf... ;-)
yes.. enjoy the ride
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swampy


Registered: 06/10/13
Posts: 22
Last seen: 3 years, 7 months
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That sucks man, but try to be grateful for it! I'm thankful for all the bad trips that I've had (obviously not when it's happening), sometimes it just happens. It makes you a stronger person and a stronger tripper and I believe you can't fully appreciate a good trip without experiencing some bad times.
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