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matttt



Registered: 11/09/13
Posts: 298
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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What does this even mean?
#19287584 - 12/17/13 08:31 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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So, the other day I was hanging out with one of my really good friends and smoking a little weed. My family and friends know that I'm homosexual as I'm pretty open to them and such.
Anyways... my friend was very very high cause he just got hired at his new job and had to take a long break from weed. Additionally he was pretty drunk as he had bought some booze before I came over. I've known him since I was about 9 years old.
So he was drunk and very high and I was kinda high but not drunk yet. I've always seen him as straight and he has had many girlfriends since I've known him. As the night went on and his roommate left he asked me if I was attracted to him. I told him that he was attractive but I didn't really think about it (I've always kinda seen him as a buddy). Because he was fucked up he took it the wrong way and started questioning me about a whole lot of stuff like what it's like to have sex with a guy. Eventually he started saying that he thought I was really handsome and he was attracted to me.
It wasn't awkward saying anything or hearing that he thought I was attractive but then he asked if we could have sex and I was kinda weirded out a little bit because I've known him since he was 9. I was high at this point and didn't really know what to say so I just kept changing the subject. He asked me about 5 different times during the night before I went to bed cause I couldn't drive (tequila gets me every time).
The next day when he was sober he asked me AGAIN after I thought he forgot about everything that he had said he night before. I know there are some guys like many of my friends who become (pretty fuckin' gay) after they drink and I just thought he was one of them. I was pretty surprised by the fact he asked me again and just kept avoiding it.
I'm confused as to why he's bringing this up now. After i've known him since we were little. We basically hang out every other day or sometimes even more often so maybe he could just be confusing the fact that we hang out a lot with feelings of sexual attraction. I don't know but he's like a brother to me and not someone I want to have sex with.
So shroomery....
- What should I tell him?
- If I had sex with him would it make things awkward?
- Do you think he's gay or bi? He seems pretty straight. He literally has gone DAYS without bathing. Plus he has posters of naked girls all over his place.
- Is it possible to confuse normal friendship with sexual attraction?
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Sleepwalker
Overshoes

Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: matttt] 1
#19287636 - 12/17/13 08:53 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
matttt said: I don't know but he's like a brother to me and not someone I want to have sex with.
So shroomery....
- What should I tell him?
- If I had sex with him would it make things awkward?
- Do you think he's gay or bi? He seems pretty straight. He literally has gone DAYS without bathing. Plus he has posters of naked girls all over his place.
- Is it possible to confuse normal friendship with sexual attraction?
You should probably tell him the truth, you don't want to have sex with him. Having sex with him would probably make things awkward if only because you don't actually want to. 
He sounds bi to me man, and it sounds like he is well aware of it. His bathing schedule doesn't mean shit.
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Lynnch
Strangerer



Registered: 04/29/09
Posts: 7,886
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: Sleepwalker]
#19287809 - 12/17/13 09:54 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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[quote]What should I tell him?[/quote] "he's like a brother to me and not someone I want to have sex with."
[quote]If I had sex with him would it make things awkward?[/quote] Well, it's certainly going to change things. I think it is possible to have a fling with a friend and then go back to being friends, however there are plenty of people that can't do that. Feelings always linger. That's not even getting into considering if this would be his first gay experience etc. I have lost friends over one night drunken hookups.
[quote]Do you think he's gay or bi? He seems pretty straight. He literally has gone DAYS without bathing. Plus he has posters of naked girls all over his place.[/quote] Neither of those things guarantee that he's straight... He's really the only one that can tell you.
[quote]Is it possible to confuse normal friendship with sexual attraction?[/quote] Feelings are weird man. I can totally understand feelings of companionship getting mixed up with more.
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
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Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: Lynnch]
#19287990 - 12/17/13 10:51 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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It's always freaky when the straight ones make a move. I had a straight friend do that, and we ended up being "jerk off" buddies. No more, even though he wanted me to fuck him. That wasn't going to happen.
He probably is slightly gay, but more than that, he thinks you are attractive and maybe is jealous that you never found him attractive.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
Edited by koods (12/17/13 10:54 AM)
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Patlal
You ask too many questions



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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: matttt]
#19288104 - 12/17/13 11:22 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
matttt said: So shroomery....
- What should I tell him?
- If I had sex with him would it make things awkward?
- Do you think he's gay or bi? He seems pretty straight. He literally has gone DAYS without bathing. Plus he has posters of naked girls all over his place.
- Is it possible to confuse normal friendship with sexual attraction?
What should I tell him?
Either yes or no
If I had sex with him would it make things awkward?
Obviously
Do you think he's gay or bi? He seems pretty straight. He literally has gone DAYS without bathing. Plus he has posters of naked girls all over his place.
Obviously bi-curious or simply very closetly gay
Is it possible to confuse normal friendship with sexual attraction?
Of course, people do it all the time
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koods
Ribbit



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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: Patlal]
#19288118 - 12/17/13 11:25 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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I think the awkward ship has already sailed. It is going to be weird from here on out.
Personally, I think if you do find him at all attractive, you should go for it. I think it will be more awkward if you didn't.
He obviously somewhat curious about the gay thing. Isn't it better that he experiment with someone he can trust than some random stranger?
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
Edited by koods (12/17/13 11:29 AM)
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Anonymous #1
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: koods]
#19288134 - 12/17/13 11:31 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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does he want it in your ass or his
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,399
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 10 minutes, 7 seconds
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OP. You should listen to today's Savagelovecast. http://savagelove.libsyn.com/rss
Skip to 14:30.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Anonymous #2
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: koods]
#19288580 - 12/17/13 01:14 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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OP,
I have had friends attracted to me and I could have fooled around with them but I didn't. Yet I am still friends with them and I think our friendship is more solid because I did not indulge in that. If you are hesitant about it, I would not hook up with him. You stand to lose a lot if you do.
At best, it ends up being really good but do you want to mess with someone who you are close to and is obviously sexually confused?
I would tell him what you just said, you see him as a brother and you already said you thought he was attractive. It's not like he is too ugly, you just think it is not a good idea.
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: Anonymous #2] 2
#19289376 - 12/17/13 04:24 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
At best, it ends up being really good but do you want to mess with someone who you are close to and is obviously sexually confused?
Yeah, who would want to have sex with someone who they are close to? Sex is for random strangers. 
From personal experience, I can honestly say that having sex with someone who was a friend has never made the friendship "weird." You kids today place way too much weight on sex. It's just a thing.
Edited by koods (12/17/13 05:25 PM)
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matttt



Registered: 11/09/13
Posts: 298
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: koods]
#19290054 - 12/17/13 06:45 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Update:
He called this afternoon asking if I wanted to hang out. About 1 hour in he asked how I felt about it. I said I felt fine but if we did anything then I would still like to know him as a friend and not as anything else.
I went for it. It was alright. Obviously his first time, but he liked it. Didn't really make things awkward.
I don't really care to pursue it again considering I know him so well. If it comes up again, whatever I'll do it. I think he was more curious then interested in doing it regularly anyways.
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matttt



Registered: 11/09/13
Posts: 298
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Quote:
Anonymous said: does he want it in your ass or his
He's used to vagina so wadda ya think?
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,399
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: matttt]
#19290127 - 12/17/13 07:04 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
matttt said: Update:
He called this afternoon asking if I wanted to hang out. About 1 hour in he asked how I felt about it. I said I felt fine but if we did anything then I would still like to know him as a friend and not as anything else.
I went for it. It was alright. Obviously his first time, but he liked it. Didn't really make things awkward.
I don't really care to pursue it again considering I know him so well. If it comes up again, whatever I'll do it. I think he was more curious then interested in doing it regularly anyways.
 I think you did the right thing. I think you are right about him being just curious, and I think a friend is a lot better route to take than someone else.
It would have been a lot more awkward if nothing happened. There would be an unanswered tension.
I actually think that's pretty damn cool. It probably took a lot of nerve (and weed) for him to bring it up at all. I wonder how long he's been pondering asking you.
Edited by koods (12/17/13 07:09 PM)
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ManianFH
living in perverty


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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: koods]
#19290319 - 12/17/13 07:49 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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if i were you, i would not get involved sexually. that kind of stuff can fuck up friendships.
if you do have sex with that guy, i dont think there is anything wrong with asking someone to take a shower first.
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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sukhavati12
Level 50 Mushroom Shaman



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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: matttt]
#19290453 - 12/17/13 08:21 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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I had a fling with one of my "straight" friends. He wound up becoming obsessed with me and got upset when I didn't want to make anything serious out of it, and now we don't talk anymore.
I still say go for it, OP.
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matttt



Registered: 11/09/13
Posts: 298
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: koods]
#19290953 - 12/17/13 10:42 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
mick said: if i were you, i would not get involved sexually. that kind of stuff can fuck up friendships.
if you do have sex with that guy, i dont think there is anything wrong with asking someone to take a shower first.
Hahaha he bathed. Nothing's awkward after what happened. He liked it and it was ok for me too, though I would prefer not to do it again. Like stated previously.
Quote:
koods said:
Quote:
matttt said: Update:
He called this afternoon asking if I wanted to hang out. About 1 hour in he asked how I felt about it. I said I felt fine but if we did anything then I would still like to know him as a friend and not as anything else.
I went for it. It was alright. Obviously his first time, but he liked it. Didn't really make things awkward.
I don't really care to pursue it again considering I know him so well. If it comes up again, whatever I'll do it. I think he was more curious then interested in doing it regularly anyways.
 I think you did the right thing. I think you are right about him being just curious, and I think a friend is a lot better route to take than someone else.
It would have been a lot more awkward if nothing happened. There would be an unanswered tension.
I actually think that's pretty damn cool. It probably took a lot of nerve (and weed) for him to bring it up at all. I wonder how long he's been pondering asking you.
He actually said he's thought about it for a while, but he was afraid to ask because he thought I was straight until I came out about 6-7 months ago. I think he's a little more than curious. He really ended up liking it. It didn't take him more than 5 minutes. I definitely have a different idea of him now. Although all our other mutual friends will not be knowing about what happened.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: matttt]
#19292656 - 12/18/13 10:09 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
matttt said:
Quote:
Anonymous said: does he want it in your ass or his
He's used to vagina so wadda ya think?
so you were the catcher in this case?
hopefully your friendship isnt ruined in the long run
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memes
Blessed



Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 27,785
Loc: In a Tree
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cool situation glad it worked out
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,399
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 10 minutes, 7 seconds
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
Quote:
matttt said:
Quote:
Anonymous said: does he want it in your ass or his
He's used to vagina so wadda ya think?
so you were the catcher in this case?
hopefully your friendship isnt ruined in the long run
What kind of friendship was it if something like a little physical contact would ruin it? Some seriously uptight people in this thread.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Anonymous #1
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Re: What does this even mean? [Re: koods]
#19292755 - 12/18/13 10:42 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
koods said:
Quote:
Anonymous said:
Quote:
matttt said:
Quote:
Anonymous said: does he want it in your ass or his
He's used to vagina so wadda ya think?
so you were the catcher in this case?
hopefully your friendship isnt ruined in the long run
What kind of friendship was it if something like a little physical contact would ruin it? Some seriously uptight people in this thread.
Speak for yourself? For all you know, OP's friend may be having some serious second thoughts about it all. Since they were 9 he was acting straight.
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