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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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OfflineBlack_Sunset
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I want to understand love
    #19283482 - 12/16/13 11:47 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I thought I was beginning to grasp the idea of being in love but with each new relationship it becomes more of a fleeting memory...obscured by what I don't know. I thought if I grew close enough to someone we would be in love... but I've only had what I would call "being in love" happen once and it lasted a deep 2 years, at age 20. I'm only 25 now, keep in mind... I haven't been married or even met anyone I would want to be with eternally, but I think it will happen.

I'm just confused by what love is supposed to feel like. I'm more accustomed to the feel of the hole love leaves behind than the feeling itself. I was with this girl for 2 years and I did not experience the same "in love" feeling I had felt with another previously. I think I was forcing it and it never came to fruition, but I loved her in a different way but it felt minuscule in comparison. Now I'm with this new girl and I'm scared I'm doing the same thing... I'm scared it isn't going to be the same as it was with the only girl I fell in love with but does that make sense? My expectations are impossible because it's not the same person obviously but I have nothing else to base being "in love" off of.

I wonder if I put too many walls up and don't let myself love...like it's locked up inside me. What if I can never love the same again? I want to love fully and passionately...to be overwhelmed and drown in it... I want to get jealous and hot headed... I want to be sick and wretch with agony when I lose it because these are my expectations. Maybe I'm looking for my life force inside the love of another human being and I will forever be chasing a ghost. I'm not living the life I want to live and as a result I am not nearly as happy as I should be...merely content, and I wonder if this affects my ability to love.

I think this girl is ready to spill her heart and when she looks back into my eyes I want to meet her gaze with the soul of another being who feels the same. I don't want to drag another innocent victim through the deception that is my life.


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Invisiblechicksgrowtoo
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Re: I want to understand love *DELETED* [Re: Black_Sunset]
    #19283599 - 12/16/13 12:17 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

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OfflineBlack_Sunset
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Re: I want to understand love [Re: chicksgrowtoo] * 1
    #19283722 - 12/16/13 12:42 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

chicksgrowtoo said:
wish I could help you...unfortunately I'm a firm believer that love is nothing more than chemicals in your brain and it gets me off to hear something real like that whispered into my ear during sex hahaha...




So if you were locked in the throws of passion and they whispered "quantum mechanics might be the physical evidence for emotions science has been searching for" you would get off? Or the other way around..


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Invisiblechicksgrowtoo
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Re: I want to understand love *DELETED* [Re: Black_Sunset]
    #19283749 - 12/16/13 12:47 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

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Invisiblechicksgrowtoo
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Re: I want to understand love *DELETED* [Re: chicksgrowtoo]
    #19283754 - 12/16/13 12:48 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

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OfflineBlack_Sunset
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Re: I want to understand love [Re: chicksgrowtoo]
    #19284383 - 12/16/13 02:58 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Doesn't anyone have anything to add? I feel like there could be some consolation in the fact that I'm probably going through something everyone goes through at some point?

I just read this quote that made me feel pretty good:

There are no right answers
only honest intent


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Offlinesukhavati12
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Re: I want to understand love [Re: chicksgrowtoo]
    #19285876 - 12/16/13 08:35 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Baby don't hurt me.


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Offlinesukhavati12
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Registered: 07/03/13
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Re: I want to understand love [Re: sukhavati12]
    #19285888 - 12/16/13 08:38 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

...but seriously OP, this is something everyone goes through.

I think #2 on this list relates to your situation.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-you-sabotage-your-love-life-explained-by-science_p2/


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OfflineBlack_Sunset
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Re: I want to understand love [Re: sukhavati12]
    #19287923 - 12/17/13 10:30 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Holy crap thank you it's spot on and I realize that


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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order


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