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Rhizohunter
myco-nerd



Registered: 04/22/11
Posts: 7,894
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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Horrible thought loop from psychosis
#19282029 - 12/16/13 12:48 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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During my episode of psychosis over the summer I was going through a delusion where I thought my family members were "demons" and were trying to kill my soul. I was using heavy psychedelics at the time and learned how to fall into my mind and go into something I call the astral world.
One of the things the voices told me to do was to kill all my family members. I used the powers that I was given to me (in my mind) to visualize myself cutting off my family members heads (I thought it would kill the demons inside of them). Now I have these visuals of me holding my family members heads with them smiling at me.
These visions creep into my head 3 or 4 times a day (at least) and it is traumatizing because they are really good people who were just trying to help me when I was going through all the shit.
Just needed to get this off my chest somewhere, this isn't something I can abide on my family. They will look at me differently forever if I told them I have visions of me holding their severed head.
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HappyHooligan
Tree hugger


Registered: 11/06/13
Posts: 483
Loc: America
Last seen: 6 years, 9 months
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Re: Horrible thought loop from psychosis [Re: Rhizohunter]
#19282051 - 12/16/13 12:56 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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I have experienced psychosis before, not something I tell my family or friends just because it sounds crazy as hell. Only reason I say it on here is because I don't know anybody, so even if someone judges me & says something to me... they don't know me in real life so I don't care, ya know?
-------------------- Do you trust the government? You may be suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.
 
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HappyHooligan
Tree hugger


Registered: 11/06/13
Posts: 483
Loc: America
Last seen: 6 years, 9 months
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Re: Horrible thought loop from psychosis [Re: HappyHooligan]
#19282060 - 12/16/13 12:59 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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even one episode can screw with your mind for a long time, one of the reasons I am scared to try psychedelics. Smoking weed alone makes me trip.
-------------------- Do you trust the government? You may be suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.
 
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Rhizohunter
myco-nerd



Registered: 04/22/11
Posts: 7,894
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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Re: Horrible thought loop from psychosis [Re: HappyHooligan]
#19282069 - 12/16/13 01:05 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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I believe psychedelics somehow link the dreamworld to reality. At points it was like I was having a dream while being awake and I have had multiple nightmares while being awake.
Some of the images that would pop in my head made no sense. It's like your mind is an antenna, picking up messages from an outside source.
My brain has been giving me the finger for months now.
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schwarg



Registered: 07/15/12
Posts: 2,817
Loc: San Diego
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Re: Horrible thought loop from psychosis [Re: Rhizohunter]
#19282071 - 12/16/13 01:07 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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WTF??? What the hell were you taking??
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Rhizohunter
myco-nerd



Registered: 04/22/11
Posts: 7,894
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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Re: Horrible thought loop from psychosis [Re: schwarg]
#19282076 - 12/16/13 01:09 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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It was more a mixture of things I was taking. Mostly DMT, mushrooms, and cocaine.
Smoking weed throughout of course.
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schwarg



Registered: 07/15/12
Posts: 2,817
Loc: San Diego
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Re: Horrible thought loop from psychosis [Re: Rhizohunter]
#19282083 - 12/16/13 01:12 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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