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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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I saw a Masai warrior on TV yesterday, who said..
If little kids cry all the time.. We brand both their cheeks.. Cause then when they cry the tears get in the wounds.. That hurts a lot.. So they stop crying.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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fapjack
Title



Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Moonshoe]
#19278294 - 12/15/13 09:07 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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My parents spanked me and my 2 brothers and it didn't make us listen any better. After getting spanked I felt like they were in the wrong, but when they yelled at me I felt much worse. We were really fucking crazy though, and probably would have been even bigger assholes if they didn't discipline us from time to time. I think it depends on the kid, but who the hell knows. I don't think we should tell parents how to raise their kids within reason, and spanking a kid on the butt isn't the same as whipping them with a belt.
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Big_Dave


Registered: 07/07/13
Posts: 393
Loc: DC burbs
Last seen: 5 months, 14 days
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Re: Hitting children [Re: fapjack]
#19278337 - 12/15/13 09:24 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Sometimes I think I should've gotten smacked around a little more. Maybe it would have taught me a little more respect but I don't know.
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danlennon3
LivingIsEasyWithEyesClosed.....



Registered: 10/29/02
Posts: 19,246
Loc: usa
Last seen: 1 year, 13 days
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Asante]
#19278342 - 12/15/13 09:26 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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most people are soooo sensitive to this topic... I CANNOT believe that someone compared spanking to sexual abuse When my older brothers were in trouble, they were borderline beaten.. a LOT. and it shows to this day in some negative ways. When I came around my dad had learned a lot since then. He only spanked me in extreme cases. Those few spanking invoked a LOT of fear in me so when he caught me in the act of doing something bad, all he had to say was "do you wanna be spanked" and that fear stopped me in my tracks! IMO, spanking in some cases is healthier than not spanking.
In general if a child is NOT afraid of their parents when they do something wrong, they will most likely take advantage of that situation. They do not understand that all their bad behavior will have MAJOR repercussions in the future. When the kid wont listen and the parents arent spanking them, the parents will verbally have to reprimand them... Which is WAY less efficient and from what ive seen, VERY possibly more damaging than spanking!
Bullying can probably be linked to verbal abuse in some way. And thats why they are verbally abusing others. When someone is being bullied in school, they are told to tell elders... If you are being bullied CONSTANTLY, it doesnt matter who you tell, it doesnt matter how much you try to make fun back... Chances are that bully will continue. Now. If you are being bullied all the time, if you punch that kid in the face and attack him for a couple seconds, he will NEVER bully you again! You two will probably end up being friends after that! and other people bullying you will most likely stop too.
Just one spanking can stop future bad behavior. The lack of it is causing overly-sensitive, verbally abusive kids. IMO and IME, this is way WAY more damaging on ANYONE's psyche over one or two physical altercations.
There is NOTHING negative about a rare spanking when its needed.
-------------------- "Psychedelics should be used not to escape reality, but to embrace it"
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Crystal G



Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Quote:
Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:
Crystal G said: Actually the best (and most pacifist) way of stopping a child from throwing a tantrum is by kneeling down to their level, and hugging them very tightly. Hold your embrace until they stop. Children throw temper tantrums when they feel very alone in the world.
hahahaha... no
children throw tantrums for a multitude of reason including mental illness, it's good to see the liberal mindset that wants to coddle the criminal, that wants to lead them to the 'affluenza' defense when they run down a bunch of innocent people and yes, we arent talking about criminals per se, but the lack of disciplinary action can often lead to this as we're seeing now
Hahahha that's interesting, because somebody with a Master's degree in Child Education (with a concentration in Disabled Children's Learning) taught me that. She knows literally everything about children. She also taught me that when little kids get hit, the only message they receive is, "My parents don't love me," not "I deserved that because of the way I was acting."
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Synthe]
#19278348 - 12/15/13 09:28 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Synthe said: Right, make this about politics, because if it's conservative than it must be right for everybody, riiiiiiight?
there's a reason conservatives are called 'the right', it's because they are, and liberals are called 'the left' because they're all that's left over after those that are right have spoken
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Crystal G



Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Crystal G]
#19278368 - 12/15/13 09:33 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Crystal G said:
Quote:
Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:
Crystal G said: Actually the best (and most pacifist) way of stopping a child from throwing a tantrum is by kneeling down to their level, and hugging them very tightly. Hold your embrace until they stop. Children throw temper tantrums when they feel very alone in the world.
hahahaha... no
children throw tantrums for a multitude of reason including mental illness, it's good to see the liberal mindset that wants to coddle the criminal, that wants to lead them to the 'affluenza' defense when they run down a bunch of innocent people and yes, we arent talking about criminals per se, but the lack of disciplinary action can often lead to this as we're seeing now
Hahahha that's interesting, because somebody with a Master's degree in Child Education (with a concentration in Disabled Children's Learning) taught me that. She knows literally everything about children. She also taught me that when little kids get hit, the only message they receive is, "My parents don't love me," not "I deserved that because of the way I was acting."
Like I said in my original post, I have no problems with hitting TEENAGERS. (So much for your "affluenza" claim, maybe you should re-read my post.) I would beat the fuck out of my teenager if they were acting out. Hitting teenagers does not traumatize or scar or hurt them deeply in the way that it affects children when you hit them. Most of them aren't even afraid of you by that point. Young children, especially little toddlers, do not understand why you are hitting them, except that you do not love them.
Again, I used to be pro corporal punishment, that is how I grew up, but I changed my mind after learning a little bit about child development.
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Crystal G]
#19278369 - 12/15/13 09:33 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Crystal G said:
Quote:
Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:
Crystal G said: Actually the best (and most pacifist) way of stopping a child from throwing a tantrum is by kneeling down to their level, and hugging them very tightly. Hold your embrace until they stop. Children throw temper tantrums when they feel very alone in the world.
hahahaha... no
children throw tantrums for a multitude of reason including mental illness, it's good to see the liberal mindset that wants to coddle the criminal, that wants to lead them to the 'affluenza' defense when they run down a bunch of innocent people and yes, we arent talking about criminals per se, but the lack of disciplinary action can often lead to this as we're seeing now
Hahahha that's interesting, because somebody with a Master's degree in Child Education (with a concentration in Disabled Children's Learning) taught me that. She knows literally everything about children. She also taught me that when little kids get hit, the only message they receive is, "My parents don't love me," not "I deserved that because of the way I was acting."
oh, a masters degree means she knows everything about children
it's called an 'appeal to authority', it's a logical fallacy
why didnt she tell you about oppositional defiant disorder, a mental illness that also leads to those tantrums, she seems to have it rooted down to a single cause of a kid feeling alone, of course, ADD/ADHD, bi-polar disorders and the like would never play any part in any of it because someone with a masters degree told you so and she knows everything about children
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Crystal G]
#19278378 - 12/15/13 09:35 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Crystal G said:
Like I said in my original post, I have no problems with hitting TEENAGERS. (So much for your "affluenza" claim, maybe you should re-read my post.)
so teaching a child right from wrong should wait until they're in their teens, a point in which it could be too late, remember, "old dog, new tricks"
why is hitting a teen more acceptable?
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Crystal G



Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Quote:
Prisoner#1 said: oh, a masters degree means she knows everything about children
it's called an 'appeal to authority', it's a logical fallacy
No, she has the master's degree on top of already knowing a lot about children because she reared many. And I might add, none of her children ended up ever using drugs or committing any crimes like a lot of families end up raising. All of her children ended up being raised to be what you would call "model citizens."
You don't even have children, so who am I going to listen to, a young adult male who is childless and probably never bothered to study or read a single thing about children, or a woman with tons of children (who all grew up to be good human beings) who studied children's behavior because it is her passion?
Quote:
why didnt she tell you about oppositional defiant disorder, a mental illness that also leads to those tantrums, she seems to have it rooted down to a single cause of a kid feeling alone, of course, ADD/ADHD, bi-polar disorders and the like would never play any part in any of it because someone with a masters degree told you so and she knows everything about children
All children have ADD. If I was a kid born 5 years ago, I would have been diagnosed with ADD. Many scientists (Einstein) would probably have been diagnosed with ADHD.
Oppositional defiant disorder, I honestly question whether that's a mental illness or simply a negative state of mind. I wonder if it's something the DSM created to cast people who are anti-authoritarian and anti-government as "mentally ill."
Edited by Crystal G (12/15/13 09:45 AM)
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fapjack
Title



Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Well if you hit a teen, chances are it would be your girlfriend which would be a case of domestic violence. I think she's talking about something different.
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Crystal G



Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Quote:
Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:
Crystal G said:
Like I said in my original post, I have no problems with hitting TEENAGERS. (So much for your "affluenza" claim, maybe you should re-read my post.)
so teaching a child right from wrong should wait until they're in their teens, a point in which it could be too late, remember, "old dog, new tricks"
why is hitting a teen more acceptable?
As I already said earlier, hitting teenagers does not traumatize or scar or hurt them deeply in the way that it affects children when you hit them.
The problem is, hitting a child might not end up with the results that you would like. If you end up traumatizing the child, the child could inadvertently end up becoming the teenage monster that you always wanted to prevent.
Remember the lady who wrote "Tiger Mom?" Well 2 years after she wrote the book she recanted her beliefs, because once her daughter turned 13 she started rebelling against her strict mom.
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Uzziel
O_o


Registered: 12/30/10
Posts: 11,689
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Quote:
danlennon3 said: most people are soooo sensitive to this topic... I CANNOT believe that someone compared spanking to sexual abuse
Yeah that was really retarded.
There are some kids out there who need to be smacked. Fuck all this nonsense about hugging them when they are throwing their tantrum I've seen little shits who punch and scream and pull hair when they get mad and that is unacceptable.
There is plenty of behavior that deserves smackin.
I can't believe people are saying smackin your kid is child abuse... its called discipline. There is a fine line between discipline and beating your fucking kid...
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Big_Dave


Registered: 07/07/13
Posts: 393
Loc: DC burbs
Last seen: 5 months, 14 days
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I've always been told that physical discipline should only be used with babies as they associate it with their actions and not you. Obviously we're not talking about really knocking them around but just a little pain to set'em straight. If my son is throwing a tantrum the last thing I'm gonna do is give him a hug. Honestly, I just ignore him or tell him to go cry somewhere else cause nobody wants to hear it.
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fapjack
Title



Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Crystal G]
#19278412 - 12/15/13 09:44 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Crystal G said:
Quote:
Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:
Crystal G said:
Like I said in my original post, I have no problems with hitting TEENAGERS. (So much for your "affluenza" claim, maybe you should re-read my post.)
so teaching a child right from wrong should wait until they're in their teens, a point in which it could be too late, remember, "old dog, new tricks"
why is hitting a teen more acceptable?
As I already said earlier, hitting teenagers does not traumatize or scar or hurt them deeply in the way that it affects children when you hit them.
The problem is, hitting a child might not end up with the results that you would like. If you end up traumatizing the child, the child could inadvertently end up becoming the teenage monster that you always wanted to prevent.
Remember the lady who wrote "Tiger Mom?" Well 2 years after she wrote the book she recanted her beliefs, because once her daughter turned 13 she started rebelling against her strict mom.
No one over the age of 13 ever gets PTSD.....
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Quote:
danlennon3 said: Just one spanking can stop future bad behavior. The lack of it is causing overly-sensitive, verbally abusive kids.
a judge told my brother "if you dont spank your children then you're abusing society" and when asked by a Family and Children Services case worker if I spank my kids (allegations of child abuse from my ex wife), I answered yes, she saw no issues with corporal punishment and after watching the behavior of my children around me, she saw that they weren't afraid of me which indicates that they arent abused.
like with yourself, I rarely have to mention anything more than some form of punishment in order for my kids to behave more appropriately
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Mescalean
Burke is love, burke is life.


Registered: 01/18/12
Posts: 6,755
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Uzziel]
#19278428 - 12/15/13 09:48 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Ill throw this in. All the boys in my family are little shits. I was, my dad was, my cousins, every one of us.
We were all punished physically. Usually after the first belt/woodenspoon/soap (liquid) we usually didn't hit or say that word after that.
HITTING KIDS WORKS.
-------------------- FREE BURKE
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Crystal G



Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Re: Hitting children [Re: fapjack]
#19278433 - 12/15/13 09:49 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
fapjack said: No one over the age of 13 ever gets PTSD.....
Well, by that age 13 year olds are already aware and can figure out that you are hitting them because you did something wrong, and probably deserved it. It also doesn't hurt them physically or emotionally when they get hit, and they don't spend their lives fearing you.
The main time that I think it would be alright is if they hit you (or any adult) first. Young teens can't go around thinking they have free range to hit random people without getting their ass handed to them. If they were hitting another teenager they would have been involved in a fist fight.
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fapjack
Title



Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Crystal G]
#19278436 - 12/15/13 09:50 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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There are plenty of shitty parents that do or don't spank their children, and there are also plenty of shitty kids.
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Crystal G



Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Re: Hitting children [Re: Mescalean]
#19278437 - 12/15/13 09:51 AM (10 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Mescalean said: Ill throw this in. All the boys in my family are little shits. I was, my dad was, my cousins, every one of us.
We were all punished physically. Usually after the first belt/woodenspoon/soap (liquid) we usually didn't hit or say that word after that.
HITTING KIDS WORKS.
And how did you end up growing up as a teenager? Did you become rebellious and start taking drugs?
This is my point here. It is effective in the short-term, but how does it affect these children later on in their teen years as they grow up?
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