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gzuf
٩(̾๏̮̮̃̾๏̃̾)۶



Registered: 07/13/09
Posts: 6,535
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Why waste your time on someone who cheats on you? Generally speaking almost all relationships value monogamy.
-------------------- +1 Post ٩(̾๏̮̮̃̾๏̃̾)۶
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luvdemshrooms
Two inch dick..but it spins!?


Registered: 11/29/01
Posts: 34,247
Loc: Lost In Space
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: gzuf]
#19202138 - 11/28/13 07:02 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Many would agree but that's not really what I asked.
-------------------- You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity. What one person receives without working for another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for that my dear friend is the beginning of the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it. ~ Adrian Rogers
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gzuf
٩(̾๏̮̮̃̾๏̃̾)۶



Registered: 07/13/09
Posts: 6,535
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I mean, if you are monogamous, you probably don't want your partner cheating you be it past, future, etc.
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luvdemshrooms
Two inch dick..but it spins!?


Registered: 11/29/01
Posts: 34,247
Loc: Lost In Space
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: gzuf]
#19202162 - 11/28/13 07:05 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Sorry, what I asked was how did you reach the conclusion that "almost all people want to know if their partner has cheated on them"?
Gut feeling? Research? Something you read? I'm curious.
-------------------- You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity. What one person receives without working for another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for that my dear friend is the beginning of the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it. ~ Adrian Rogers
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE


Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: gzuf]
#19202167 - 11/28/13 07:07 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
gzuf said: Why waste your time on someone who cheats on you? Generally speaking almost all relationships value monogamy.
exactly. I actually just told her because she called me and asked whats wrong. She said "I already knew that", "we'll be okay", "are you sick of me?"
This seems unhealthy. How is she accepting this so easily? Why is she worried about me breaking up with her? Should I still end it?
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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SoreSpore
Registered: 03/06/12
Posts: 7,481
Loc: Halfway there...
Last seen: 9 years, 11 months
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If you tell her, I bet she will dump you. Rightfully so.
If you continue to sleep in the bed you made, everything will continue on just as it is. At some point, your mistake and lie will be so far in the past it won't feel the same as it does at this moment.
Clearing your conscious and relieving your guilt in this situation seems to be your motivation, which isn't the morally sound decision in my opinion. The opportunism is evident.
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misterjingo
Divided by zero



Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 669
Loc: Shangri-La
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Quote:
ModestMouse said: This seems unhealthy. How is she accepting this so easily? Why is she worried about me breaking up with her? Should I still end it?
Has she got self esteem issues?
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE


Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: SoreSpore]
#19202197 - 11/28/13 07:12 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Read my above post. I expected her to dump me. That hasn't happened as of now.
YES she does have self esteem issues.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Mush4Brains
LOOL HACKED!!!

Registered: 07/31/13
Posts: 4,419
Last seen: 9 years, 3 months
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I agree with luvdemshrooms.
Admitting you had sex is absolutely retarded. You take this kind of shit to the grave. You can't change your scumbag actions, no reason to make more scumbag actions and bring her down with you.
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Juicin
Stranger

Registered: 10/27/13
Posts: 897
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Why not just end it OP? Easier for all parties
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misterjingo
Divided by zero



Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 669
Loc: Shangri-La
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Personally, I couldn't be with someone who doesn't respect themselves enough to kick my ass if I did cheat. I've ended a relationship in the past when my (then) GF would repeatedly turn my shit behaviour around on herself and find a way to make it her fault.
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE


Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Quote:
Mush4Brains said: You take this kind of shit to the grave.
How can an aspiring psychonaut realistically do that? A real mind explorer takes nothing to the grave. The deeper I bury it the bigger a splash it will make when it surfaces during a trip/meltdown. That's ridiculous.
Not even that, but a girl who I care about deserves to know exactly where she stands.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Hobozen


Registered: 11/03/11
Posts: 10,634
Loc:
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: Juicin]
#19202222 - 11/28/13 07:17 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Juicin said: Why not just end it OP? Easier for all parties
Then she will have to live wondering why. Or should the OP make up another lie as a reason to end the relationship?
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Versicolor
♖♘♗♔♕♗♘♖



Registered: 05/04/11
Posts: 2,268
Loc:
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: Hobozen]
#19202248 - 11/28/13 07:23 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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How long ago do you think she found out? When you told her it was just a kiss, do you think she maybe already knew it was more?
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Juicin
Stranger

Registered: 10/27/13
Posts: 897
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: Hobozen]
#19202261 - 11/28/13 07:27 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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You're being melodramatic she'll move on and so will he. And the next guy won't have to deal with trust issues OP caused
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE


Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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I don't think she ever found out but she probably always had a suspicion in the back of her mind, and just played it off like it was nothing out of shock.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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luvdemshrooms
Two inch dick..but it spins!?


Registered: 11/29/01
Posts: 34,247
Loc: Lost In Space
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Re: Ending the lies [Re: Juicin]
#19202279 - 11/28/13 07:30 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Juicin said: And the next guy won't have to deal with trust issues OP caused
I'm guessing you've never known many women who's ex cheated on them.
-------------------- You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity. What one person receives without working for another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for that my dear friend is the beginning of the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it. ~ Adrian Rogers
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE


Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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This isnt the first time she's been cheated on by a guy, which is why I initially kept it a secret.
It's fucked up, what I did.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Shroomslip
Architekt



Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,656
Last seen: 1 hour, 49 minutes
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Quote:
luvdemshrooms said:
Quote:
ModestMouse said: From a logical standpoint though, keeping this a secret for longer will hurt her more in the long run. I don't see what you're getting at?
How is her not knowing you cheated and lied going to hurt her more in the long run?
I don't believe hurting her to make yourself feel better is the right thing to do.
Just because OP doesn't tell her doesn't mean she won't find out sooner or later. These things have way of coming out regardless of who tries to keep the secret. The longer the relationship goes on and the longer she grows attached to OP, the more it's going to hurt when she does find out.
I've also never known a single person who didn't/wouldn't want to know when they were being cheated on.
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With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way. I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today. Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear. I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear. You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline
Edited by Shroomslip (11/28/13 07:37 PM)
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Shortknight



Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 2,164
Last seen: 6 years, 6 months
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You got do what you gotta do man, do what feels right n' follow that gut! Sometimes you can do things that hurt, but have to be done. The big wheel will keep on spinning .
Shorty
-------------------- Did I say it too loud? Big heart? Or a little misleading!
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