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OfflineNotLiving
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Registered: 09/25/13
Posts: 52
Last seen: 2 years, 17 days
Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone?
    #19179347 - 11/23/13 03:14 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Hey, I was wondering if anyone had done LSD for time ever alone. I'm probably gonna guess it's not recommended because doing it with friends could be a lot better, but I feel like if I'm gonna be doing it around friends, they're more into doing it to "get fucked up"... I don't mind that, as it could still be fun but I'm dealing with some problems of my own (emotional numbness, depression, anhedonia, apathy) and I'm really just trying to find a way to make me feel something, maybe for a moment or so. Anything.

I'm tired of living life like this. It's not even considered living, and hell, I'm not "normal" like everyone else. Everyone wants to go party, everyone wants to go socialize, everyone wants to go out and not stay at home because just being around friends is a fun thing to do. For me? Well, that was kinda like how I felt a few years back... but ever since I've been hit by feeling like shit, it just gradually got worse and worse. I put an effort in hanging out with friends, I put an effort in going places, but I feel no reward. I feel no reward with making money off my job either.

I can't even listen to music and hear it like I used to. My mind doesn't feel clear, my brain feels fogged up and cloudy everyday, and I can't even visualize or think clearly at all. School's tough because my reading comprehension is shit and my focus is nonexistent. Life is tough. Forming relationships with new people or feeling connected with friends is also gone. I don't feel connected with anything or anyone.

I want to understand this, guys. Can a LSD trip help you understand? Can it show you the reason why you feel like this?

I feel like... nobody should ever experience such a thing. It literally makes living life feel like nothing.

I don't care if I end up bawing my eyes out during a trip. I don't care if I end up feeling sad over some shit or angry, frustrated, jealous, whatever. I just want to feel some emotions, to let me know that I still have them.

I exercise regularly, I go out with friends regularly (not as much as I used to), but nothing feels the same. Not even drinking, not even smoking, and not even MDMA does much for me. Sure, I feel the effects of them but after all of it, I end up feeling like crap. Like even more disconnected in a way.

But it doesn't matter what I do... In the end, time will still be passing by. It's just that I'm unable to enjoy any of it for the time being.

Have anyone here ever experienced a similar type of thing and saw the light after a trip?

I've just been suffering for well over a year or so and things have never seemed to get better... I don't even know what I could do.

I'm aware that psychedelics are never the "answer", but more so a "tool" that you can use to help you out. That at the end of the day, it's probably gonna be "you" who's supposed to make the change. Take everything you learned and apply it to your sober self. That's what I intend to do. I just want to be alive again. I just want to live.


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OfflineShroomDoom
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: NotLiving]
    #19179543 - 11/23/13 04:21 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

LSD is not a magic bullet that will cure your apathy and depression however in a controlled setting with a properly guided experience it can possibly catalyze a deep introspective event where you can choose to examine these types of feelings from a unique perspective. Sometimes this can lead to "aha" moment type breakthroughs and major insight, sometimes delusion and confusion. It really is a gamble. Ultimately it will be up to you to decide if any gleaned insights bear weight and have enough significance to enact the appropriate life changes.


--------------------


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Offlineel_barto
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: NotLiving]
    #19179553 - 11/23/13 04:23 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I think it would be good for you.  Just make sure what you have is LSD, and start off with small doses. my  :2cents:


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OfflineKingKnowledge
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Registered: 03/30/13
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: el_barto]
    #19179587 - 11/23/13 04:35 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

bonafib said:
I think it would be good for you.  Just make sure what you have is LSD, and start off with small doses. my  :2cents:




I can't stress small doses enough. Don't go all heroic on us; start with 100mics or so. A tab.


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InvisibleChasingBliss
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: KingKnowledge]
    #19179624 - 11/23/13 04:45 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

KingKnowledge said:
Quote:

bonafib said:
I think it would be good for you.  Just make sure what you have is LSD, and start off with small doses. my  :2cents:




I can't stress small doses enough. Don't go all heroic on us; start with 100mics or so. A tab.




Would a 110ug tab be a good "first" dose? I'd like to trip for the first time by myself also and was wondering about a good first dosage


--------------------
:leaf:


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Offlinebourgasm
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Registered: 11/07/13
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: ChasingBliss]
    #19179663 - 11/23/13 04:53 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

First time I did it I did it alone, I say go for it I think its the funnest way to do it


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OfflineKingKnowledge
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: ChasingBliss]
    #19179667 - 11/23/13 04:53 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

ChasingBliss said:
Quote:

KingKnowledge said:
Quote:

bonafib said:
I think it would be good for you.  Just make sure what you have is LSD, and start off with small doses. my  :2cents:




I can't stress small doses enough. Don't go all heroic on us; start with 100mics or so. A tab.




Would a 110ug tab be a good "first" dose? I'd like to trip for the first time by myself also and was wondering about a good first dosage




Yes. Although the certainty of the microgram dose is impossible to nail down. Even if your dealer says 110 mics, it could be 60. A tab is usually a good first dose.


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Invisibleiamerror73
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Registered: 09/14/13
Posts: 356
Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: NotLiving]
    #19179804 - 11/23/13 05:33 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I haven't done LSD alone before but during the times I was alone, I had moments that were very introspective and mind expanding
Not saying I came out a better person afterwards but it definitely made me do a lot of thinking about my life when I was having a rough time
Hope things go well for you! :super:


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OfflineNotLiving
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Registered: 09/25/13
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: ShroomDoom]
    #19180347 - 11/23/13 08:05 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

ShroomDoom said:
LSD is not a magic bullet that will cure your apathy and depression however in a controlled setting with a properly guided experience it can possibly catalyze a deep introspective event where you can choose to examine these types of feelings from a unique perspective. Sometimes this can lead to "aha" moment type breakthroughs and major insight, sometimes delusion and confusion. It really is a gamble. Ultimately it will be up to you to decide if any gleaned insights bear weight and have enough significance to enact the appropriate life changes.



Thanks. I understand that it's not a magic bullet. I'm aware of the fact that nothing gets better all of a sudden, similar to how things don't get from being normal to really really shitty. At least, I didn't experience that. If I did, I'd be finding it very hard to cope and might even get so paranoid about everything and just want to end it.

I'd like to give it a try with a friend or so... hell, I really don't mind... but I'm in it to feel something... Some emotions, anything at all. I don't understand :/ MDMA didn't make me feel much of anything, but what's confusing is ... how come I even feel like this? What has made me feel from being an emotional, happy and energetic outgoing person to someone who can't feel shit at all?


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OfflineAcidreamer
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: NotLiving]
    #19180571 - 11/23/13 09:13 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

By your description, it sounds like you're struggling with textbook depression. I have too for many years, and as someone who takes psychedelics alone regularly (all my first times were alone too) I can say that yes, it's an enjoyable and therapeutic experience for me. My depression hasn't gone away, that may be something biochemical - I don't know - but I can say that LSD in particular has really opened up my perspective on some personal issues and brought me immense joy when little else would. I wish all the best of luck to you. :heart:


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Offlinethemusicofzann
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: Acidreamer]
    #19180575 - 11/23/13 09:15 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

do with a friend.


--------------------


The above is hypothetical, when it is illegal.

Psychedelics are performance enhancers for the philosopher.

Knowledge and wisdom are one and the same.


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OfflineLysergicX7
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Registered: 11/11/12
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: themusicofzann]
    #19180582 - 11/23/13 09:17 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I only trip by myself anymore, everybody else is usually a distraction. I get extremely self concious and feel too vulnerable around other people on acid. Trippin alone is rewarding.


--------------------
“Everybody is fundamentally, the ultimate reality. Not god in the political kingly sense, but god in the sense of being the self – the deep down basic whatever there is. And you’re all that… only you’re pretending you’re not.” -Alan Watts

I think that in human evolution it has never been as necessary to have this substance LSD. It is just a tool to turn us into what we are supposed to be.”
― Albert Hofmann


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OfflineNotLiving
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Registered: 09/25/13
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: LysergicX7]
    #19180904 - 11/23/13 11:43 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Acidreamer said:
By your description, it sounds like you're struggling with textbook depression. I have too for many years, and as someone who takes psychedelics alone regularly (all my first times were alone too) I can say that yes, it's an enjoyable and therapeutic experience for me. My depression hasn't gone away, that may be something biochemical - I don't know - but I can say that LSD in particular has really opened up my perspective on some personal issues and brought me immense joy when little else would. I wish all the best of luck to you. :heart:



Thank you... I don't think it's possible that our depression would be completely lifted from us... Maybe everyone lives with depression in them, but some hasn't gotten to the point where it's noticeably bad.

Who knows.

But thanks, I just love to hear these type of reassurance.

Quote:

LysergicX7 said:
I only trip by myself anymore, everybody else is usually a distraction. I get extremely self concious and feel too vulnerable around other people on acid. Trippin alone is rewarding.



I get a ton of mixed responses... I guess it really depends on how I'm feeling. I could just go out with friends and stuff, but man... The days are seriously feeling like they never end... I just want to do something about it but being patient and just waiting waiting it all out doesn't do anything for me.

Things don't simply get better when I wait. I just want to discover... And just planning things take time, especially with friends... It's a lot of a hassle for me.

-sigh- This hasn't been getting easy for me at all.


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InvisibletheRAPeutic
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: NotLiving]
    #19180991 - 11/24/13 12:17 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Just remember that it could possibly make what you're feeling worse as much as it can good. Also, 12 hours feels like a whole day of tripping... well it pretty much is, so have something to do. GO outside, nature is the best on psyches


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Invisibleletterbomb325
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: theRAPeutic]
    #19181297 - 11/24/13 02:37 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I did a few hits by my self for the first time. Its pretty cool! With people is definitely better though, but its not horrible alone.


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Offlineblackmilk
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: letterbomb325]
    #19182574 - 11/24/13 01:05 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Dont want to sound like a square, but it sounds like you need to take a break from drugs, not do more. Everything psychs do for you/us/me spiritualy, can be accomplished sober as well. Learn to enjoy your life sober, because if your unhappy and do drugs to make you happy, no matter how you spin it, your gonna have a bad time.

Everyone has bad shit they deal with day to day, and psychs can help with these things, but if your truly down and out of yourself, its not going to really help and has big potential to make things worse.

Or it might work, who knows.


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OfflineNotLiving
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: blackmilk]
    #19185414 - 11/25/13 03:30 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

blackmilk said:
Dont want to sound like a square, but it sounds like you need to take a break from drugs, not do more. Everything psychs do for you/us/me spiritualy, can be accomplished sober as well. Learn to enjoy your life sober, because if your unhappy and do drugs to make you happy, no matter how you spin it, your gonna have a bad time.

Everyone has bad shit they deal with day to day, and psychs can help with these things, but if your truly down and out of yourself, its not going to really help and has big potential to make things worse.

Or it might work, who knows.



I am simply unable to enjoy my life at all. Sober, on drugs, whatever it is. I haven't gave psychedelics a try yet. I have stopped smoking weed as often because it makes me feel really out of it.

I've come across the disorder "schizoid personality disorder" and a lot of it seems to be something I can relate to. The thing is, a lot of people who seem to be suffering from this just seem to be content with the way their life is. That they don't care about anyone or anybody. For me, that's not the case... I want to be alive, I want to feel alive, and I want to be happy and connected with everyone. I don't know if that makes me any different than a person who's apathetic or with SPD, though.

People who are apathetic seems to not care about the fact that they're apathetic. I want to feel emotions. I want to care.

I don't take drugs often. I know there's gonna be mixed response of how drugs are not the answer. I don't think that they're a cure but I just want some insight. Just a bit of an experiment... maybe life will get better, maybe it won't.


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OfflineTheGreenBox
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: NotLiving]
    #19186647 - 11/25/13 11:53 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I am sorry to hear about your situation. I had some similar feelings recently, but not as extreme as yours. Basically I was just looking for direction in life and a bit of motivation. I'm graduating university this year and am so lost in terms of what I want to do after. I had been feeling down, stressed, nervous, tired, all that stuff for a few months.

I took mushrooms and I absolutely loved it. I felt pure joy and happiness for the first time in a while. Just SO much love I couldn't do anything but sit there with my jaw open saying "Holy fucking shit, why can't everybody feel this way?!". I literally cried tears of joy at one point. So it was good to feel that way.

Then I started getting some weird vibes and had a pretty bad 20 minute episode. I swear I knew what death and hell felt like. It was an absolutely horrendous experience but I felt myself begging to go back to reality. When I woke up the next day I was SO happy to be back to "real life" and I realized how much I took for granted. Over the next few weeks I slowly became more happy, motivated, figured my shit out. I've been more kind to others, accepting, and caring. I feel more in love with my girlfriend than ever before.

I can't wait to trip again. Whether a good or bad trip, there's something you can learn about yourself and the world around you. I'm not sure about LSD as I've never taken it, but I would recommend trying mushrooms. Take around 3g dried cubensis, and eat them normally but in a sandwich or something. It'll probably be good for you if you puke from it - for me, it felt like as I puked I was getting rid of every negative feeling in my mind. Felt amazing after.

Good luck, and good vibes. PM me if you need someone to talk to. Try mushrooms :smile:


--------------------
And in my darkest moment, fetal and weeping, the moon tells me a secret - my confidant. As full and bright as I am, this light is not my own and a million light reflections pass over me. Its source is bright and endless.

- Tool


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Invisibleletterbomb325
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Registered: 01/24/13
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: TheGreenBox]
    #19186662 - 11/25/13 11:57 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

If you are having problems enjoying life then i don't know how much good psychedelics will do you. You will have a ridiculously crazy emotional/ religious experience and a lot of negative thoughts will consume you if you go into it with a negative mindset, even if you don't think you are in one. You will come out refreshed and partially (or completely on rare occasions) healed none the less.


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Offlineratscanrap
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Re: Doing LSD for the first time ever, alone? [Re: letterbomb325]
    #19198651 - 11/27/13 10:46 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Hey probably my first post here. Experienced Lsd user. I love to trip by myself recently, but i hate to be in an indoor area(such as my room) I like to go out and explore. Also I only trip at night which seems a bit odd but I love how calm it is when it gets dark and quiet. I usually take a cycle or a stroll to my 24/7 supermarket here.

Firstly would like to add that LSD has done MAJOR life changing moments for me. I used to be addicted to gambling and was losing loads of money ( I had no idea I was addicted and kept denying when everybody around me was telling me this) I had a life changing experience in one of those trips which literally 'woke' me up.

Being depressed whilst taking LSD might not seem like a good idea, but to me I kinda encourage it. Highly encourage it to do it alone as well, does not give you distractions and you can have time with your mind alone.


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