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c0ntent_in_spac3
Higher being


Registered: 10/02/13
Posts: 22
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
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Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it
#19158440 - 11/19/13 06:34 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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And also the ability to take a couple deep breaths on a normal day.. and it almost tells u what u "would" be dreaming about if u were asleep. I don't really know how else to explain it but if anyone has or has had experiences like this please share...
-------------------- The ego tries to prove that we cannot change, undermining our ability to transcend obstacles
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eve69
--=..Did Adam and ...?=--



Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 3,910
Loc: isle de la muerte
Last seen: 24 days, 20 hours
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Re: Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it [Re: c0ntent_in_spac3]
#19158451 - 11/19/13 06:39 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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When I cold turkeyed poppy pods, and weed after five years of use I was insomniac for 6 whole months. I mean I slept in half hour naps through sheer exhaustion. I went through some hugely weird headspaces, like the understanding all occult facts headspace, the every move I make is a ritual headspace, the I am going to forget about all driving laws and go the wrong way up oneway streets, right on lefts, go through red lights and shit headspace. I was cosmically angry. And get this, smoking cigarettes really exacerbated the whole thing because instead of staying in bed I would get up at any hour and go smoke. It was a super bad time of my life. I remember having one pseudo dream where I flipped through every card in the tarot deck and understood them all - every detail.
Drug abuse will do that.
-------------------- ...or something
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Oliveaux
Stranger


Registered: 11/12/13
Posts: 40
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
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Re: Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it [Re: eve69]
#19164060 - 11/20/13 09:11 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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hmm, i've never had anything like this happen because of insomnia or sleep deprivation though i've experienced visuals, particularly grainy/pixelated vision. One time after being awake for three days i was lying in my bed trying to sleep and staring at the curtain. Somehow the flowers on the curtain became soccer players who were kicking balls back and forth to each other. Definitely one of the stranger things I've experienced.
Anyway, perhaps your deep breathing experience is more of a meditation where you enter a trance state? Trance states while falling asleep/waking up, deep meditation and tripping are quite similar IMO, and not by coincidence.
-------------------- “To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never to forget.”
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eve69
--=..Did Adam and ...?=--



Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 3,910
Loc: isle de la muerte
Last seen: 24 days, 20 hours
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Re: Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it [Re: Oliveaux]
#19164273 - 11/20/13 10:08 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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I've had that soccer dream before when I was really young. I got sick and they gave me belladonna tablets and I smoked pot then I couldn't feel my breath and I thought I was going to die, and I went crying to my mom and confessed and then I went back to sleep and had this waking dream hallucination in bright color of being a ball getting kicked around the freeway but the colors were so vivid.
-------------------- ...or something
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it [Re: eve69]
#19164354 - 11/20/13 10:25 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
eve69 said: When I cold turkeyed poppy pods, and weed after five years of use I was insomniac for 6 whole months. I mean I slept in half hour naps through sheer exhaustion. I went through some hugely weird headspaces, like the understanding all occult facts headspace, the every move I make is a ritual headspace, the I am going to forget about all driving laws and go the wrong way up oneway streets, right on lefts, go through red lights and shit headspace. I was cosmically angry. And get this, smoking cigarettes really exacerbated the whole thing because instead of staying in bed I would get up at any hour and go smoke. It was a super bad time of my life. I remember having one pseudo dream where I flipped through every card in the tarot deck and understood them all - every detail.
Drug abuse will do that.
It's nice to see you not angry anymore.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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eve69
--=..Did Adam and ...?=--



Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 3,910
Loc: isle de la muerte
Last seen: 24 days, 20 hours
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Re: Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it [Re: Icelander]
#19165386 - 11/20/13 01:28 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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no shit -- it was nuts - i got a dui and in fights and stuff - those days are over
-------------------- ...or something
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it [Re: eve69]
#19166423 - 11/20/13 05:04 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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You may come visit then.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Chuckfinely
another round for me an my buddy

Registered: 06/27/13
Posts: 628
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Re: Insomnia and the ego death feeling that comes with it [Re: eve69]
#19169238 - 11/21/13 10:10 AM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
eve69 said: no shit -- it was nuts - i got a dui and in fights and stuff - those days are over
Congratulations on kicking the habit. I've been battling with heavy opiate use for the past year, only managing to stay sober for 3 weeks at the longest. Ruined that 3 weeks because my head and teeth had been ringing so bad for 5 days that I said to myself "If I was on that other shit then half of a hydrocodone wont touch me". I think it was about 30 minutes later I was ordering up a gram of dope 
I was in an insane head space for those 3 weeks. Total insomnia, paranoid delusions, auditory hallucinations, and probably more but my memory is way too fuzzy. I was constantly thinking I was hearing people arguing, and that it was about me. Or that I could hear the cops coming to bust my door down. Or that car has pulled in and out of my lot too many times...etc. 
I've been weening myself the past couple weeks, I'm down to using only twice a day. My due date for sobriety is coming in about a week, so I'll be going through another 10 days of unbearable dope sick.
Wish me luck
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