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Anonymous #1
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being physical 1
#19150828 - 11/17/13 05:23 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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I've always been shy and never practiced much approaching girls. Recently however, I've been going out to a small club with a tight-knit scene and running into a lot of familiar faces and getting attention from girls. This is sweet, and a big confidence boost.
The issue is that I have trouble being physical. A girl will dance up in front of me, look back, and, in my head it seems they want me to dance, but I can't bring myself to take their hands and dance or anything. I get that girls have sex drives like anyone else, but I've got a mental block here. I think it's a respect thing. I'm not overly physical with anyone and so I have a hard time putting hands on somebody without feeling like I'm imposing myself. Any advice on overcoming this issue?
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Patlal
You ask too many questions



Registered: 10/09/10
Posts: 44,797
Loc: Ottawa
Last seen: 1 hour, 31 minutes
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So you're the quiet guy sitting at the table. So what. If you don't like to dance or feel that touching is inappropriate, don't do it. Just chill.
If you get asked to dance and you don't feel like it, politely decline or say that you would rather sit a talk rather than dance.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: being physical [Re: Patlal]
#19151513 - 11/17/13 07:54 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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It's more like I'm the quiet guy on the dancefloor. I don't have issues with being introverted, rather I think I would do well for being more forward with girls I'm interested in. I guess it isn't as big a deal as I make it up to be.
Edited by Anonymous (11/17/13 08:18 PM)
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Black_Sunset
Amateur Anesthesiologist


Registered: 11/16/08
Posts: 2,451
Loc: Somewhere California
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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It's easy man! Next time just go out there dance near the ladies and if they are feeling you just make your move. Do what works for you man! Watch other guys and copy - just don't creep up from behind and grab them wtf is that shit. If you want specifics, going up to them and lightly but firmly place your hand on their side usually works wonders. Smile a lot! Have fun! If the grinding gets freaky don't forget to use those hands. Talking to someone and being like, hey come dance with me, is probably the winner right there.
What kind of places are you going? What kind of music. Are you a baby raver? aww.
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Anonymous #1
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Aww, maybe my youth is showing. My naivety surely is. I wouldn't say I'm a baby raver as I've been to more than a fair share of shows, but I'm definitely new to putting myself out there like this.
I'm talking about electronic shows with some local and some bigger names (caught Desert Dwellers this Saturday ) at a small venue, maybe 100 heads tops, with party lights and the whole nine yards. No drinks are served at the venue and it's not your typical club scene. I'm at least familiar with most of regulars there and have a crew of people I go out with every week, so I'd like to avoid doing anything offensive or brash because...well, I like these people. Your approach seems totally on point though, I'll keep that in mind.
Edited by Anonymous (11/17/13 11:28 PM)
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Black_Sunset
Amateur Anesthesiologist


Registered: 11/16/08
Posts: 2,451
Loc: Somewhere California
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Good for you man. With the smaller crowds you really need to treat everyone as if they're your good friend. Respect goes a long way especially if you want to be invited back. I think you're right to be putting some thought into this. In such a small scene you're bound to make new friends every time and one time you're going to hit it off with a beautiful lady. Be your awesome smiley self and get that hot mama on the dance floor!
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