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stellarshnap
Poet who doesn't know it


Registered: 05/24/12
Posts: 646
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement
#19149423 - 11/17/13 12:01 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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This is something that I thought I had gotten over. But I noticed it in myself quite strongly recently. I had just written some poetry whilst stoned as all hell, and all I could think about after finishing was what people thought of it. So I went and posted it anywhere I could, showed it to anyone I could. All I heard was praise, "perfection, solid" etc. The words didn't even make a mark on me. I thought WHY IS IT PERFECT?! WHY IS IT SOLID?! I feel like it's a piece of shit, can't you just tell me it's a piece of shit so I can stop taking myself seriously? Please?
Does anyone know what the psychological mechanisms behind this are, and how to get the fuck rid of them? I'm tired of searching for approval. If that's even what I'm searching for.
-------------------- Careful, though your mind may be over matter, matter is all we really know. "Or is it?" The problem with intelligence is that it fosters arrogance, and arrogance suffocates intelligence. True intelligence however, bites holes in the bag.
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eve69
--=..Did Adam and ...?=--



Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 3,910
Loc: isle de la muerte
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: stellarshnap] 1
#19149601 - 11/17/13 12:44 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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The creative process is very difficult to get a grip on. I am an artist in a few areas and I am almost never satisfied with my work. Occasionally I do like something I do. But then people almost always respond best to the most simplistic things I do and spend little time on those things I real like. So I get little to no fulfillment from the appreciation of others. I have been called a genius but even then it was by someone who I always argued with and so I felt little from that praise. But to do art without any audience is to basically do nothing because art is communication.
I believe that you want others to communicate and to do so in an interested and involved manner. That is where you would get some sense of accomplishment.
Also, you must not have posted here at the Shroomery because we emphatically aren't an ass kissing - oh wowow - perfection - type crowd.
-------------------- ...or something
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: eve69]
#19149664 - 11/17/13 01:00 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Perhaps OP has it right, and you do to an extent, it's about desire for acknowledgement. Being judged "world class" as I have been as a brewer. Brewing is both science, and art, and a lot of process perfecting.
But after three Best Of Shows in judged contests, all I can do is repeat, and repeatedly piss off my competitors. Gloat yet again that I am the best, they must acknowledge it as I hold the trophy high. Or not. Is is better to win or lose for motivation?
On the lighter side I let random folks taste my homebrew, if they give me good feedback vs. "I like it" it hardly matters. My pleasure is in letting them taste something excellent that they might not otherwise taste. Their lack of critique that helps me make better beer is to be expected.
For real competitors, expect respect, for jealous wanna be folks expect the rest.
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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absols
Stranger
Registered: 11/10/13
Posts: 986
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: eve69]
#19149667 - 11/17/13 01:02 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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from my opinion, I would say that superiority is freedom, then logically others opinions will put you down anyways
but also, superiority is freedom as being truth rights, then you should more care about something real, so whatever you might say about or do would be relatively an objective right done, so the superiority recognition wont matter that much when you know that what you did is truly superior
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stellarshnap
Poet who doesn't know it


Registered: 05/24/12
Posts: 646
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: absols]
#19149707 - 11/17/13 01:10 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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"Absolutely perfect in every way; thank you for that unexpected read.
I want more."
^response in the poetry thread on the shroomery. I appreciate the compliment and all, but.. I don't know.
-------------------- Careful, though your mind may be over matter, matter is all we really know. "Or is it?" The problem with intelligence is that it fosters arrogance, and arrogance suffocates intelligence. True intelligence however, bites holes in the bag.
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: stellarshnap]
#19149728 - 11/17/13 01:15 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
stellarshnap said: "Absolutely perfect in every way; thank you for that unexpected read.
I want more."
^response in the poetry thread on the shroomery. I appreciate the compliment and all, but.. I don't know.
I read it, and it was truly a piece of shit.

-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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liquidlounge

Registered: 12/22/10
Posts: 9,256
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: LunarEclipse]
#19149745 - 11/17/13 01:20 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Where's your music?
XXX I AM READY...
-------------------- As far as I assume to know...
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: liquidlounge]
#19149790 - 11/17/13 01:31 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Well that's great LL you could post that link. Next time I get the desire to listen to an hour plus of Coltrane blues, I will know where to go.
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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liquidlounge

Registered: 12/22/10
Posts: 9,256
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: LunarEclipse]
#19149844 - 11/17/13 01:41 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Here, take this hun:
My wrist is cut, and yourself?
-------------------- As far as I assume to know...
Edited by liquidlounge (11/17/13 01:52 PM)
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Re: Inferiority and the Infinite Desire for Acknowledgement [Re: liquidlounge]
#19150006 - 11/17/13 02:26 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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I cut a fart earlier. Does that count?
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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