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Brubbles
Stranger

Registered: 03/07/13
Posts: 25
Last seen: 8 years, 10 months
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Thought loops and anxiety
#19116412 - 11/10/13 06:21 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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I don't have much experience with psychedelics beyond cannabis, which happens to be the only "drug" I consume regularly (usually once a day, a few hours before bed). No caffeine, alcohol, etc. This has been my routine for three or four years. I say this because I know many posting in this section are encountering issues dealing with their drug use and wanted to preface by saying I'm not regularly partaking in substances known for causing these issues (beyond cannabis).
Roughly a year ago, my mother fell ill and nearly died. Thankfully, she is recovering now, but that sent me into a pretty stressful state of being for roughly half a year. I attribute part of my current issues to this, but I'm unsure how valid such a conclusion is. I'm an only child to a single mother, so she is quite close to be, but my anxiety issues didn't start until roughly three months ago.
I've been a fairly unhappy person most of my life and have always dealt with anxiety. Cannabis allowed me to gain a different perspective, address many of my issues, and "solve" them. This relieved most of my anxiety and the last few years have been much more enjoyable than most of my life. I've also accomplished quite a lot during this time frame.
However, since about September, I've been experiencing frequent thought looping that seems to spring from nowhere. I feel like my thoughts are "sticky" in that I'm always attempting to sort my thoughts into categorization by repeatedly going over them in my head. These thoughts are related to seemingly inane things such as trying to remember all of the characters in a novel by name, what happened (specifically) in each chapter, all of the anime I'm watching this season and how far along I am in each (including character names, what is going on in each series, etc.), how many miles I biked yesterday and the day before, etc. My memory is likely above average but these things still rule my day. These thoughts (and subsequent anxiety from my inability to escape them) take up 80%+ of my day and many days go by in which I can't recall thinking about anything else.
I wake up feeling like I'm still dealing with the thought categorizing from the day before (and then that leads to worrying about doing it later, or tomorrow, etc.) and it never ends. I also feel the need to remember the thoughts in specific order, placing them in "physical" order in my mind.
The only things that seem to shut these loops off are strenuous exercise to the point of exhaustion or a low dosage (0.5mg) of Ativan. Both of these return my mind to what I consider my "normal" state leading up the last few months.
I've taken breaks from cannabis (1-2 weeks at a time), worked on my diet even more, and started exercising more than in the past and I'm still not making any progress. I've spent a lot of my time meditating and making conscious efforts to work on my mental space but have been going backwards if anything.
I am much, much too poor to afford any type of treatment requiring payment without guaranteed results so I'm turning to the Shroomery for some advice to hopefully get me on the right path. Any assistance would be greatly appreciated.
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GreySatyr
Pagan-Psyche


Registered: 06/20/13
Posts: 3,376
Loc: North Carolina
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Re: Thought loops and anxiety [Re: Brubbles]
#19117008 - 11/10/13 08:06 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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I eat mine with smoothies and fruits.
I only puked the first time and that was possibly because I fasted all day and had a nerve wracking driving experience. Haha.
-------------------- ...also, go to hell, huh?
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circastes
Big Questions Small Head



Registered: 01/14/10
Posts: 8,781
Loc: straya
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Re: Thought loops and anxiety [Re: GreySatyr]
#19117475 - 11/10/13 09:41 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Spend hours relaxing with relaxation music (youtube?), really deep stress-free relaxation where you feel the stressed areas really go back to a natural state and where you feel energised and motivated afterwards. Really, really, profound relaxation.
-------------------- My solitude... My shield... My armour... TESTED WITH FULL FORCE
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
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Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
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Re: Thought loops and anxiety [Re: circastes]
#19120761 - 11/11/13 02:04 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Interesting. I get stuck like that every once in a while, although it usually involves me going over conversations I've had or want to have... Over and over and over. Sometimes, after a couple hours of not being able to do anything because I'm completely involved in this, I just lose it and start screaming at myself to just stop. It doesn't work. Honestly, the only thing that seems to break the cycle is resolving whatever issue I was thinking about.
--------------------
NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Spacerific
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Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 4,923
Last seen: 8 years, 10 months
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Re: Thought loops and anxiety [Re: koods]
#19123343 - 11/11/13 09:05 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Making out? Playing with ? Vigorous fornication? I suspect those will help to bring you back in the present moment again.
Meditation-wise, have you tried one of the active types of pranayama? Like kapalbhati or Breath of Fire? You can find either of em on youtube to see how it's done, and really give them 5-10 minutes on the clock. After 10 minutes of either of them you'll be in a very very different head space. Eyes closed of course.
I for one found regular meditation (sit still, breathe slow and long) to be completely ineffective for me when nervous / anxious / restless, but these more active types really help. Try em out, it's free and safe, takes 10 min to try.
Use a timer or a short song or something, to have an actual set time limit, not just doing it as long as you feel like it. Compare Kapalbhati and BoF, pick whichever you like best and stick with it for a while.
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
Edited by Spacerific (11/11/13 09:11 PM)
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EmL



Registered: 01/27/13
Posts: 154
Loc: Sweden
Last seen: 9 years, 7 days
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Re: Thought loops and anxiety [Re: Spacerific]
#19140323 - 11/15/13 10:11 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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I see myself in a lot you write, it's a really big problem yet a small one. My overthinking can range from anything from a conversation I've had to something I read or even music, whereas a same small part goes over and over infinite number of time. Sometimes I can manage to shut it off quite easily, other days it's impossible.
My grandma had a stroke few months back, and I was high when I heard about it. Luckily she survived, but I took it real hard and it became much more severe after that.
Thanks for the video, Spacerific. I've tried meditation and I'm sure it would help but since it doesn't help right away it's hard to stick with it.
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Spacerific
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Registered: 10/13/12
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Last seen: 8 years, 10 months
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Re: Thought loops and anxiety [Re: EmL]
#19142316 - 11/15/13 07:28 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Thanks for the video, Spacerific. I've tried meditation and I'm sure it would help but since it doesn't help right away it's hard to stick with it.
Then try some movement meditation, don't just stand still. A few days ago I woke up feeling like utter crap, and started to run around a bit, staying present, and with a stopwatch running, to see how long it takes for light exercise, breathing and presence, to put me in a decent mood.
Turns out it was 16 minutes that time. 10 didn't work, 13-14 weren't quite enough, but 16, that was it. This was with some running, breathing in a certain rhythm that was following Santo Daime songs (they get in your head after an aya ceremony, you can bring them up and follow them later), raised pulse and actually breaking into a bit of a sweat.
I used to give half-assed attempts at meditation, a few breaths or stretches etc. I'd give up in 4-5 minutes then conclude it doesn't work for me. Maybe it would have worked in 8-9 minutes, but I gave up after 5. If you don't go all the way and measure it, you never know.
Next time you want to try, just get a measurement like this. Start working out, put a stopwatch, and get that number, how minutes in do you actually feel way better? If it's 35 for you, you'll know it's 35. Also I bet that number goes down with practice, as your body gets the hang of it. If you just give up after 20 concluding exercise doesn't work, then you won't be able to use this fine free method.
We KNOW exercise leads to endorphin release, that's axiomatic. You just need to find out in a few instances, how long it takes for you and what kinds work best.
If that doesn't work, then fuck it, just break out the big guns 

-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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TheFakeSunRa
Bitch Splitter



Registered: 03/01/05
Posts: 16,449
Loc: Dirdy SOUF
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Re: Thought loops and anxiety [Re: Brubbles]
#19144097 - 11/16/13 03:32 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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That sounds like it might be some kind of OCD.
-------------------- [quote]Asante said: You constantly make posts thatr fling middle school insults at people you don't like mixed in with maladjusted psychopathic comments about wanting to beat up the other poster with a crowbar. You know how shit you are, you just don't give a fuck for precisely that reason. I disendorse you.[/quote]
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Anonymous #1
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I am 38 m/w/f, I never believed in real mental issues, anxiety, depression, etc, until after my mother became ill with brain cancer, and I too started having run away thinking and bouts of anxiety. After trying every thing the medical dr could throw at me I decided it was no way to live, and sought out our towns crazy vitamin pusher lady, I call her my witch doctor. She had me flying right within a week by supplementing some basic minerals I was apparently lacking. Potassium, magnesium, and iodine seemed to be the key for me. She also added a b complex plus C, which supports over all nervous system function. It has been three years since my last true anxiety attack, and I no longer feel the need to even carry any breakthrough anxiety meds with me when I leave the house. During this health crises I realized the link between what we eat and how we live. I no longer eat only one meal a day, or skimp on fresh greens. If I can't eat I make sure to get a fortified shake in me at the least. Good luck.
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