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Offlineusulpsychonaut
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: Murzelpfrumpft]
    #19079903 - 11/03/13 11:26 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Obviously you are some kind of alien, spent most of your life on another planet?




Wait. More likely he was raised by his mother and the usual retarded western institutions and no intelligent father figure.


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Offlinetopdog82
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: Crystal G]
    #19080102 - 11/03/13 12:20 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Crystal G said:
Quote:

usulpsychonaut said:
So these women that are being cheated on, do they stay home, keep the house clean, raise kids, cook food for family, never go out drinking at all ever? This I think is the other side of monogamy.




I actually think the common housewife would be more prone to cheating, wouldn't you? I mean think about it. She's at home all the time, probably bored out of her mind doing thankless tasks, and if she has toddlers at home they are probably stressing her out and making her life hell. Then her husband comes home and doesn't pay any single attention to her and doesn't help her at all with the baby and doesn't appreciate her. She probably feels like the fat unlovable housewife that's always being taken for granted and is no longer attractive to her husband anymore. There's no romance in her life. Women in this situation would be inclined to seek love and attention from a third party. At least that's my assessment of the situation.



Dude holy shit. When you paint it out like that. I mean, western intitution of marriage pretty much inclines housewifes for affairs

Thats really sad :frown:


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OfflineJacksonMetaller
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: TheWiz]
    #19081621 - 11/03/13 05:45 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

TheWiz said:
I'm on the "free love" bandwagon.  IMO, monogamy is a farce to begin with.




I agree monogamy is kinda silly when it comes down to it, but the real issue is trust. If you want to have sex with many people then great, just don't take someone along for the ride who isn't interested in that. You're only hurting them


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OfflineSpacerific
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: topdog82]
    #19081628 - 11/03/13 05:46 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

I have no delusions about ever being monogamous long term. My whole plan relies on finding a nice girl that will have the same taste in women that I do, so that we can bring some nice young guest into the bedroom to play with once in a while. I'm pretty sure it's the only way I'll ever stick with the same person for all those decades.

If that doesn't work, then endless chain of new women it is :shrug:


--------------------
Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.



For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it,
and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it.
- Matthew 13:16


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Invisiblepwnasaurus
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: TheWiz]
    #19081787 - 11/03/13 06:14 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

TheWiz said:
I'm on the "free love" bandwagon.  IMO, monogamy is a farce to begin with.



I'm on the "one love" bandwagon.  IMO, polygamy is a farce to begin with.

Wait a minute, everyone is different.  Neither are a farce.  Certain people prefer one while others people prefer the other.  Others prefer neither.  It's as simple as that.


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OfflineAtrium
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #19082052 - 11/03/13 07:04 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

She probably feels like the fat unlovable housewife that's always being taken for granted and is no longer attractive to her husband anymore




I think the only women who should feel that way ARE fat unlovable women who are no longer attractive. But then why the fuck did you marry a girl who wouldn't take care of herself after a few years or is unlovable in the first place?

Shit I don't know, it's just the women I have had the pleasure of giving all of my attention to, for the short time I've been alive, seem to then have an affixed gaze for me only from thereon out. Infidelity does not then come to mind but I'd rather entirely break it off than break a heart.


--------------------
The only thing about Chemistry I like is all the psychedelics that come from it.

The only reason I study Psychology is to have a legitimate excuse to enjoy Chemistry. :tongue2:


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OfflineJacksonMetaller
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #19082670 - 11/03/13 09:05 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

pwnasaurus said:
Quote:

TheWiz said:
I'm on the "free love" bandwagon.  IMO, monogamy is a farce to begin with.



I'm on the "one love" bandwagon.  IMO, polygamy is a farce to begin with.

Wait a minute, everyone is different.  Neither are a farce.  Certain people prefer one while others people prefer the other.  Others prefer neither.  It's as simple as that.




Yes, but it's true that our perception of monogamy is ridiculous. Society tends to view it as it is the "way things should be" rather than accepting both roads. I believe that if two people are drawn together in a way that they don't want to share that love with others, that's fantastic. But if two people still find themselves sharing feelings with others then why bother? It would be healthier for them to acknowledge that and be okay with it. But there's too much pressure to just break up with the person now rather than accept a sort of open relationship. So in the end, love gets wasted and both parties end up butt hurt


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Invisiblepwnasaurus
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: JacksonMetaller]
    #19082794 - 11/03/13 09:35 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

JacksonMetaller said:
Quote:

pwnasaurus said:
Quote:

TheWiz said:
I'm on the "free love" bandwagon.  IMO, monogamy is a farce to begin with.



I'm on the "one love" bandwagon.  IMO, polygamy is a farce to begin with.

Wait a minute, everyone is different.  Neither are a farce.  Certain people prefer one while others people prefer the other.  Others prefer neither.  It's as simple as that.




Yes, but it's true that our perception of monogamy is ridiculous. Society tends to view it as it is the "way things should be" rather than accepting both roads. I believe that if two people are drawn together in a way that they don't want to share that love with others, that's fantastic. But if two people still find themselves sharing feelings with others then why bother? It would be healthier for them to acknowledge that and be okay with it. But there's too much pressure to just break up with the person now rather than accept a sort of open relationship. So in the end, love gets wasted and both parties end up butt hurt



Perhaps.  I don't really think the issue is with society though.  Personally I have no desire to be in a polyamorous / open relationship.  That is the case for the vast majority of people.  Sure, some people are not accepting of polyamorous relationships, but some people are also not accepting of homosexuality.  I think the percentage of people who are into the idea of polyamory is similar to the percentage of people who are homosexual.  In other words, they are a minority.  Now you could argue that the beliefs are pushed onto people due to society and culture, and while that may be true, the fact of the matter is it is how most people feel.

The issue in your scenario most of the time I believe is due to both partners not being on the same page about their desires (ie one wants an open relationship whereas the other does not), not that polyamory is not accepted.


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OfflineMurzelpfrumpft
pet donkey in a lucid dream

Registered: 08/09/12
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #19084501 - 11/04/13 08:34 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

pwnasaurus said:
I think the percentage of people who are into the idea of polyamory is similar to the percentage of people who are homosexual.  In other words, they are a minority.  Now you could argue that the beliefs are pushed onto people due to society and culture, and while that may be true, the fact of the matter is it is how most people feel.





There is a thing called tradition. It forces people to stick to really stupid behaviour for decades no matter the what the majority actually thinks.
I think you are wrong.

But your comparison to homosexuality has a good point:
most people are afraid to say what they really feel because of tradition and the following repression.

Being able to happily stick to one partner for a lifetime is being successfully fucked in the head by western society - in a most enjoyable way with no reason to change that.
For sure, most people are not that lucky and still follow the only sense in life: spreading their genes as widely as possible.

I wouldn't need one second to choose one of the two paths. If only there were open to me.


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Invisibledeadwk
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: Murzelpfrumpft]
    #19085701 - 11/04/13 02:35 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

So everytime I hear people talk about polyamory and monogamous relationships, the people advocating polyamory always say monogamy is some ideology forced upon us by society, and that the people in monogamous relationships are doomed forever. Then they end their posts by saying "it's just opinion and perspective though"

But they always criticize other people for being monogamous and acting as if they are enduring some terrible plague, which is ironic because they say "It's just opinion and perspective though" anyone else find that ironic? anyways....


If polaymory works for you, great! If monogamy works for you, great! It's just about finding what works. IMO I think that people in a polyamorous relationship can be in love, but I feel like there are some underlying perosnality traits in both parties making them behave in a polyamorous way.

People say monogamy creates tensions between people, but polyamory does as well. What if one partner is havign sex with others more so than the other partner.

What if one partner wants to have sex with the other, but the other partner decided to bang a different person that day?


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InvisibleThayendanegea
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #19085882 - 11/04/13 03:19 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

So why do people cheat on their partners if they are completely happy with their relationships?



Because, in most cases, they are insecure about themselves in some way and use fucking around as some sort of validation of their manhood. It is simply a "conquest" and once the act is complete, guilt usually takes over.

To me, there is very little "peace of mind" in this behavior...and, I am speaking from a perspective of one who has lived this way.:sunny::peace:M


--------------------
Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better.

Albert Einstein


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OfflineMurzelpfrumpft
pet donkey in a lucid dream

Registered: 08/09/12
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: deadwk]
    #19088670 - 11/05/13 04:49 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Try getting your expressions together, monogamy comes from gamos, greek for marriage. That's different from monoandry/monogyny.

There is also a huge difference between having sex with other people than your partner once in a while (polygyny/andry) and polyamory.

I don't think polyamory will ever work for me. I want to be as close as possible to one certain person, without making the mistakes of ignoring my/our urges.
So polygyny works like a charm for me.


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Offlineusulpsychonaut
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: topdog82]
    #19089058 - 11/05/13 08:39 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

topdog82 said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:
Quote:

usulpsychonaut said:
So these women that are being cheated on, do they stay home, keep the house clean, raise kids, cook food for family, never go out drinking at all ever? This I think is the other side of monogamy.




I actually think the common housewife would be more prone to cheating, wouldn't you? I mean think about it. She's at home all the time, probably bored out of her mind doing thankless tasks, and if she has toddlers at home they are probably stressing her out and making her life hell. Then her husband comes home and doesn't pay any single attention to her and doesn't help her at all with the baby and doesn't appreciate her. She probably feels like the fat unlovable housewife that's always being taken for granted and is no longer attractive to her husband anymore. There's no romance in her life. Women in this situation would be inclined to seek love and attention from a third party. At least that's my assessment of the situation.



Dude holy shit. When you paint it out like that. I mean, western institution of marriage pretty much inclines housewife's for affairs

Thats really sad :frown:




Hey what the hell is so bad about being a fucking house wife and what the fuck is so common about it? Crystal G is a damned fine individual, a fun hellbetty making pleasure but she has no right to run down a woman's natural function. True feminism would empower a woman's role, not masculize the female and emasculate the male. Whats bad about being a housewife is the government anti women policies attacking the family with schools and women being forced to work. The state steals the children into brainwashing programs and forces women into unemployment and shitty demeaning jobs that drive them to drink. This is fully supported by so called feminism. Seems to me that feminists really hate women. The problem is to do with politically minded people being psychopaths. Psychopath women are inventing psychotic social engineering projects and inflicting them on society.  This social engineering is working, everyone is too pussy whipped to stand up to the corruption.

True pro women policies, pro child policies, pro happy family policies would only give benefits to the most rewarding, privileged, important, sacred, spiritual point of being a woman - motherhood.

I propose a smorgasbord of financial, health and housing rewards for fidelity, the ideal number of children, home schooling and stay home mum, yay. The happiest old women have grandchildren, that have food, harmony and a mum and dad. The happiest old women are content with the memories of family, children being children, men being men, women being women, life being life, food, celebration, tragedy.

Women who go out drinking are not monogamous. At least they lay their fidelity on the line. Alcohol is a seriously hard drug. Consciously or subconsciously people go to bars to get to engage in procreating activities.

Personally I'm going to get me some fuck mates. Not everyone is up to the task of high culture. I'll play folk guitar at your weddings.


Edited by usulpsychonaut (11/05/13 08:45 AM)


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Invisiblepwnasaurus
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: usulpsychonaut]
    #19089174 - 11/05/13 09:22 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

usulpsychonaut said:
Hey what the hell is so bad about being a fucking house wife and what the fuck is so common about it? Crystal G is a damned fine individual, a fun hellbetty making pleasure but she has no right to run down a woman's natural function. True feminism would empower a woman's role, not masculize the female and emasculate the male. Whats bad about being a housewife is the government anti women policies attacking the family with schools and women being forced to work. The state steals the children into brainwashing programs and forces women into unemployment and shitty demeaning jobs that drive them to drink. This is fully supported by so called feminism. Seems to me that feminists really hate women. The problem is to do with politically minded people being psychopaths. Psychopath women are inventing psychotic social engineering projects and inflicting them on society.  This social engineering is working, everyone is too pussy whipped to stand up to the corruption.

True pro women policies, pro child policies, pro happy family policies would only give benefits to the most rewarding, privileged, important, sacred, spiritual point of being a woman - motherhood.

I propose a smorgasbord of financial, health and housing rewards for fidelity, the ideal number of children, home schooling and stay home mum, yay. The happiest old women have grandchildren, that have food, harmony and a mum and dad. The happiest old women are content with the memories of family, children being children, men being men, women being women, life being life, food, celebration, tragedy.

Women who go out drinking are not monogamous. At least they lay their fidelity on the line. Alcohol is a seriously hard drug. Consciously or subconsciously people go to bars to get to engage in procreating activities.

Personally I'm going to get me some fuck mates. Not everyone is up to the task of high culture. I'll play folk guitar at your weddings.



:loldongs:

That is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever read.


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Offlineusulpsychonaut
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #19089674 - 11/05/13 11:44 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Lets break it down;

A mother keeping a home is a dignified role, she can be happy and proud.
Crystal G is a damned fine individual.
Feminism should empower women to be women.
Governments force kids into school and mothers into work, this is bad.
Jobs suck, the stay at home role is a real privilege.
Politicians are psychopaths.
Empowering women can only mean supporting a natural feminine roll.
Drinking is unpredictable, a monogamous woman has no business going out and drinking. Husbands who think their wives can do this and never screw up are deluded.
Procreation is the underlying intention behind all human activity.
I don't have what it takes to be a family man, this requires strength and Honor.

I don't see anything ridiculous about any of this.


Edited by usulpsychonaut (11/05/13 11:54 AM)


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Invisiblepwnasaurus
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: usulpsychonaut]
    #19089796 - 11/05/13 12:12 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

usulpsychonaut said:
I don't see anything ridiculous about any of this.



You've gotta be kidding me.  You're making so many absurd assumptions it's actually mind-blowing.

Quote:

A mother keeping a home is a dignified role, she can be happy and proud.



Sure.  Working can be a dignified role too.  What are you trying to say?

Quote:

Crystal G is a damned fine individual.



How is that even remotely relevant to this thread?

Quote:

Feminism should empower women to be women.



By definition, feminism seeks to empower women as equal human beings

Quote:

Feminism is a collection of movements and ideologies aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights for women.[1][2] This includes seeking to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment. A feminist advocates or supports the rights and equality of women.[3]



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminism

Quote:

Governments force kids into school and mothers into work, this is bad.



The government absolutely does not force mothers into work.  Women are human beings who get to decide whether or not they want to work.  I would argue that forcing children to go to school is a good idea, although that is a debatable point.  Even if your statement were true, how is this bad?  You somehow jump from a (false) assertion to a conclusion with no argument.

Quote:

Jobs suck, the stay at home role is a real privilege.



That is another assumption.  Many people enjoy their jobs.  Many people dislike children.  Many people don't have children.

Quote:

Politicians are psychopaths.



Really, politicians are generally psychopaths?  Please provide me with the evidence that most politicians are psychopaths.

Quote:

Empowering women can only mean supporting a natural feminine roll.



What are you even saying?  This is ridiculously sexist.

Quote:

Drinking is unpredictable, a monogamous woman has no business going out and drinking. Husbands who think their wives can do this and never screw up are deluded.



I have never cheated on a partner nor will I.  I've also never started a fight in my life.  I have been very drunk many times.  Some people cheat.  Some people are assholes.  Only weak-minded individuals blame something else for their decisions.  And how about a monogamous man?  I guess it's fine for him to drink, because he's leading the "natural masculine roll" :rolleyes:

Quote:

Procreation is the underlying intention behind all human activity.



This may have been true hundreds of years ago but we have evolved far beyond that now.  While it still may be true for some people it is an absurd claim that procreation is the underlying intention behind ALL human activity.


Quote:

I don't have what it takes to be a family man, this requires strength and Honor.



This one may well be true.  I don't know you, so I will have to take your word for it.  At least you made one irrefutable assertion.

So, "breaking it down", that was one of the most ridiculous, sexist posts full of assumptions I have ever read.


Edited by pwnasaurus (11/05/13 12:18 PM)


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OfflineCubedude
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #19089838 - 11/05/13 12:22 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

My wife and I are in an open relationship. That is we can sleep with other people if we want, when we want. Only rules are we tell each other about it ahead of time, no mutual friends or coworkers, and use every precaution to prevent STDs. Funny thing is, we have been very happily married for six years, jealousy free, disease free. And our sex life together is great. There is no suspicion, no checkup phone calls or facebook stalking. Humans, like most animals, were never meant to be monogamous creatures. Our very biology urges us on to promiscuity and the sooner we recognize this the happier and more fulfilled lives we can lead.


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OfflineMurzelpfrumpft
pet donkey in a lucid dream

Registered: 08/09/12
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: usulpsychonaut]
    #19089889 - 11/05/13 12:32 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

usulpsychonaut said:
a monogamous woman has no business going out and drinking




This for example is an extremely sexist statement.
Calling this feminism is indeed ridiculous.

So basically you say, society should force individuals born with 2 X genes into staying at home, no matter what kind of life they wanna live.

You're a sexist and you do not understand the concept of equality at all.
It's about becoming who you want to become and not being pushed into a role.


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OfflineCrystal G
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Registered: 06/05/07
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: usulpsychonaut]
    #19091549 - 11/05/13 06:16 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

usulpsychonaut said:
Lets break it down;

A mother keeping a home is a dignified role, she can be happy and proud.




First of all, feminists also believe that being a mother and a housewife is a dignified role, that it is a role that society devalues and does not appreciate. It is however, also about the CHOICE to become a mother and a housewife. When you get women who never wanted to become mothers and secretly hate their children, that's when you end up getting moms who drown all 5 kids of their kids in the lake for insurance money.

Quote:

Drinking is unpredictable, a monogamous woman has no business going out and drinking. Husbands who think their wives can do this and never screw up are deluded.




Couldn't you say that drinking is unpredictable for EVERYBODY, and that men are inclined to cheat just as well as women when they are inebriated? I've seen tons of drunk guys at the strip clubs trying to pay women a extra bills to get them to meet in a hotel room later. Would they have done the same thing sober? Maybe some, but certainly not all.


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OfflineCrystal G
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Re: Just Found out my friends cheat on their girlfriends and wives [Re: Murzelpfrumpft]
    #19091609 - 11/05/13 06:27 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Murzelpfrumpft said:
Quote:

usulpsychonaut said:
a monogamous woman has no business going out and drinking




This for example is an extremely sexist statement.
Calling this feminism is indeed ridiculous.

So basically you say, society should force individuals born with 2 X genes into staying at home, no matter what kind of life they wanna live.

You're a sexist and you do not understand the concept of equality at all.
It's about becoming who you want to become and not being pushed into a role.




Exactly. Not to mention, a lot of guys in contemporary society don't WANT to financially support their wives all their lives. I've met guys (mostly younger guys) who would resent their wives if they had to be the sole financial supporter. Many guys also resent alimony when divorce comes, and the fact that they have to pay their wives EVEN THOUGH she depended on him financially and gave up her career to start a home with her husband.

Now, I personally wouldn't marry somebody like that, because what if I have a stroke or something in the future, are they going to treat me like shit while I'm immobilized because they resent having to take care of me? Or what if we have children and I have to stay at home, it just makes me think that somebody who has that type of greedy and selfish nature would resent his own wife and children for draining his money.

But regardless, I've met many men who complained that their live-in girlfriends or wives didn't work, and complained about the fact that they had to pay the rent. It's not something that makes both sexes happy necessarily.


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