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Anonymous #1
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Led on
#19080248 - 11/03/13 12:58 PM (10 years, 2 months ago) |
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So there's this girl that I've known for nearly a year, through mutual friends. I ended up hanging out with some of them (including her) for a few times a month. I've always thought she was cute, but she never showed any interest in me before the summer so I never asked her out. Right before the summer she finally showed interest in me but before I could do anything about it, she spent the next 2 or so months in another country on vacation. When she got back, we really seemed to hit it off. We talked for a good hour pretty deeply, the next day I got the group to go to a wafflehouse for brunch and we managed to get left alone for another hour and again we had some good convo. Next night, during some cheeky T&D we end up making out just a bit. She always gave me the feeling that she thought of me as her "gay friend" who she could talk to about her feelings but wasn't actually interested in, but finally, I realized she was physically into me. Unfortunately, I didn't see her again for nearly a month after that night.
Since then, we've still hung out with mutual friends plenty of times and I've tried to be flirty/sweet on her, sometimes she returns it. I've always felt like I could make her laugh. Still though, I always would get cut off before I could ask her out, run out of time, forget, or simply pussy out. So finally, I asked her out a few days ago, but not before confirming with a few mutual friends that she was both single and seemed to be into me (in fact, during the period that she showed no interest, she was REALLY into me). She turned me down, with the following excuse "I have a secret boyfriend from the country I vacationed at, but nobody knows and you can't tell anybody about it". I was upset at being turned down, but to be given this story that sounded like utter bullshit added insult to injury. A bit irritated, I got a bit of an attitude and acted like a jerk for a few minutes. Anyway, we find ourselves sitting around together in the room with a bunch of mutual friends. So as to "keep her secret", I text back and forth, trying to ask why she'd lie about the reason. Finally pissed with texting somebody sitting a few feet away, I respond to her latest text out loud, surprising everybody in the room. She and her sister both yell at me that she really does have a guy, storming out of the room. I ended up getting out of there asap.
So this entire time she's been acting into me, and not rejecting my advances at all, she's actually had a boyfriend and was just leading me on for months. Of course, I end up being twisted into being the bad guy because I acted like a jerk for about 15 minutes before I left. The next day I planned to apologize to her for being a jerk, but even in a tiny room together, she never looked me in the eye once and I didn't really get an opening. I figured I may as well try to salvage a friendship for what it was worth and apologize over facebook, but she's ignored what I've had to say.
I also just found out that she literally met him and after a week or two sucked his dick and fell in love, and is now expecting him to honestly wait 8+ months for her. This, of course, is coming from a "good catholic girl".
I'm rather disgusted with how she led me on and pretended to be somebody she wasn't, but if anything, she's as if not more embedded in the group as I am, the group of practically all my friends.
I'll be in the area next weekend. What should I do?
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robbyberto
Water Boy



Registered: 05/11/06
Posts: 15,499
Loc: Netherlands
Last seen: 1 month, 5 days
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Tell her to fuck off and fuck one of her friends.
-------------------- “People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
robbyberto said: Tell her to fuck off and fuck one of her friends.
Sounds plenty tempting in thought, but I'm anything but smooth with girls. Anyway, she has the respect of most of the group, I probably need to kiss up to her to smooth things over. If I keep her mad at me, she could easily spin me into the bad guy and make half the group dislike me.
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robbyberto
Water Boy



Registered: 05/11/06
Posts: 15,499
Loc: Netherlands
Last seen: 1 month, 5 days
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Well you don't want to look like a pussy so if you can't tell her to fuck off you should at least completely ignore her. Still fuck one of her friends.
-------------------- “People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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I think the concept of being "led on" is kind of a far out one, It's not like her making out with you gives you the entitlement of being like in an offical relationship with her or anything
I dunno man, idk where i'm going with this
All I know is I hope you feel better and feeling rejected can suck no doubt, etc etc.
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Sheekle said: I think the concept of being "led on" is kind of a far out one, It's not like her making out with you gives you the entitlement of being like in an offical relationship with her or anything
I dunno man, idk where i'm going with this
All I know is I hope you feel better and feeling rejected can suck no doubt, etc etc.

Ugh I guess you're right but I just don't feel like it was right to pretend to be single this whole time while being flirty with me and never rejecting my flirting.
I mean, the day after she was showing everybody pictures of her boyfriend and ex's from the other country on her phone, so it's not like she's ashamed to have had a secret long distance boyfriend, so I don't know why it was even a secret to begin with. Shit, if she had only gone out and said, "hey dude, I can tell you obviously like me but I have a boyfriend" instead of flirting with me and making out with me once, then I could've and would have just stopped trying to pursue her months ago.
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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I also think monogomy as a whole is a far out thang kinda I dunno
I just have a constantly-changing set of non-traditional beliefs about pretty much everything though 
I mean maybe ya'll shoulda all been togethers as a whole an stuff an things? Like she fux u a lot den she talks 2 him about life a lot and u too and then theres all as one happy group of loving people
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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Spacerific
- - - >


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 4,923
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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Ok let's get this organized a bit.
1. She made out with you, that's a clear signal that there COULD potentially be something happening down the road. If she had any amount of brains and expected to keep her secret bf a secret, she should have told you so pretty early on, that yes you're hot enough to make out with, but see I have this guy over here, please don't tell anybody. This would have avoided frustration for you, would have given you some nice validation as a man, and you totally could have stayed friends, making out now and then if you both felt like it.
By not doing any of that, basically thinking with her in the same way we sometimes think with our dick, she led you on, caused you needless hopes and frustration, and IMO deserved having her bullshit secret spill out. If she had a bf, she should have kept her tongue to herself. If she had a bf and kinda liked you, she should have taken 10 minutes to explain the situation. Her secret was fucked when she started sending mixed signals and then not tying up the loose ends.
2. You. Regardless of all she did, you need to up your girls skills and get some new tail. That's all on you, not on her. I feel much of the frustration and shit could have been avoided if you just had more options during this time.
So up your girl skills. Not completely easy, but not too hard either. Just put in the time and learn it, or get content at being clueless for years to come.
Regarding this one girl in the group, take her to one side once and explain to her it was her mistake on your end to spill her shitty little secret, and also a mistake on her end for leading you on and then keeping you in the dark. Explain that mistakes are no reason to start an endless gossip war over, that will fill the whole group with bad vibes and taking sides.
Then use your standard chloroform rag, make sure she doesn't hit her head as she falls, and proceed to have your way with her limp body. Film it, post it, done deal
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Spacerific said: Ok let's get this organized a bit.
1. She made out with you, that's a clear signal that there COULD potentially be something happening down the road. If she had any amount of brains and expected to keep her secret bf a secret, she should have told you so pretty early on, that yes you're hot enough to make out with, but see I have this guy over here, please don't tell anybody. This would have avoided frustration for you, would have given you some nice validation as a man, and you totally could have stayed friends, making out now and then if you both felt like it.
By not doing any of that, basically thinking with her in the same way we sometimes think with our dick, she led you on, caused you needless hopes and frustration, and IMO deserved having her bullshit secret spill out. If she had a bf, she should have kept her tongue to herself. If she had a bf and kinda liked you, she should have taken 10 minutes to explain the situation. Her secret was fucked when she started sending mixed signals and then not tying up the loose ends.
2. You. Regardless of all she did, you need to up your girls skills and get some new tail. That's all on you, not on her. I feel much of the frustration and shit could have been avoided if you just had more options during this time.
So up your girl skills. Not completely easy, but not too hard either. Just put in the time and learn it, or get content at being clueless for years to come.
Regarding this one girl in the group, take her to one side once and explain to her it was her mistake on your end to spill her shitty little secret, and also a mistake on her end for leading you on and then keeping you in the dark. Explain that mistakes are no reason to start an endless gossip war over, that will fill the whole group with bad vibes and taking sides.
Then use your standard chloroform rag, make sure she doesn't hit her head as she falls, and proceed to have your way with her limp body. Film it, post it, done deal 
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