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InvisibleRomi
Indigo Child
 User Gallery


Registered: 08/14/08
Posts: 425
Loc: Sunshine
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: ImFukNCLUELESS]
    #19074793 - 11/02/13 11:57 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I feel you... Although being single can be an amazing thing if you measure that against being together?...

I feel you, its hard but the journey is not nearly being over...


I feel like dating with a kid will be extremely difficult and not all candidates will be eligible... I need to date other parents I feel =P.

Also if you are a guy then your body hasn't changed all that much to worry about that either but for us moms is quite the trip. I gotta make all this marketable now I guess... Lol


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OfflineShroomey Toons
Shh I farted
Male


Registered: 01/30/12
Posts: 616
Loc: Planet Earf
Last seen: 9 years, 1 month
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Romi]
    #19075083 - 11/02/13 01:09 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I'm sure you'll find the right person. My girlfriend had a 6 year old daughter when we started dating. She is now my daughter.


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OfflineMello KittyS
Beautiful Burnout
Female User Gallery


Registered: 12/04/08
Posts: 8,556
Loc: Sanriotown, Harmonyland
Last seen: 7 years, 5 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Moonshoe]
    #19075107 - 11/02/13 01:17 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

i wants the babies. but ill prolly never be ready and im not getting any younger  :sonofawebitch:


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Offlinezappaisgod
horrid asshole


Registered: 02/11/04
Posts: 81,741
Loc: Fractallife's gym
Last seen: 7 years, 7 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Mello Kitty] * 1
    #19075126 - 11/02/13 01:22 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Not you, dearie.  Not you.  Not now, not ever.  I like you you and wish you well but you have no business ever being a parent.  You can't even take care of yourself.


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OfflineRockhound
The Rockweiler
Male User Gallery


Registered: 01/19/13
Posts: 664
Loc: hell creek anticline
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Romi]
    #19078975 - 11/03/13 06:33 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I disagree that being a single father cramps your dating style, my daughter has been the catalyst for many hook-ups. Women are suckers for a devoted father.


--------------------
Rocks speak to me, and tell me this:
The Hell Creek formation is a gigantic slab of rocks that covers several western states. It contains an account of the dinosaurs' demise.  In the late Cretaceous period, the first Cannabis species appear, and soon after, all the non-bird dinosaurs disappeared. Obviously, marihuana killed the dinosaurs. That giant meteor that smacked the yucatan peninsula right afterwards, coincidence.


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InvisibleBill_Oreilly
ANIMALS (the RAINBOW SERPENT)


Registered: 11/12/11
Posts: 26,370
Loc: Boston
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Rockhound]
    #19078990 - 11/03/13 06:42 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

My wife and beautiful son



--------------------
Something there is mysteriously formed,
Existing before Heaven and Earth,
Silent, still, standing alone, unchanging,
All-pervading, unfailing,
I do not know its name; I call it tao.
If forced to give it a name, I call it
Great (ta). Being great, it flows out;
Flowing out means far-reaching;
Being far-reaching, it is said to return.


It's just a shot away..


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Rockhound]
    #19079000 - 11/03/13 06:45 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I'm in my late 20's and I do not plan on having children until I am married and we have both saved up at least a certain amount of money, and have been working in a stable career for a certain number of years. I would like to give the best to my children, including sending them to private school, giving them music lessons, and having them in sports and clubs, and those are all things that cost a lot of money. I really feel like typical American parents don't push their kids enough to excel in extracurricular activities such as music or sports, and this is something I am very adamant I will do.

If I do the math for only the music lessons (including instrument cost) and private schools alone, I'm guessing it would cost over to $30,000 a year.

From what I have heard about kids, it's very much a love/hate relationship. You friggin' HATE them cause they stress you out so bad all the time and wish they would STFU and stop annoying you and wish you had free time just so you could get a good night's sleep for once. But at the same time you LOVE them to death and would sacrifice your blood and go without eating just to do anything for them.

People have told me that the love that parents feel for their child is a love like no other. That it's indescribable. Based on what people have told me what it's like to hold their daughter or son for the very first time, it seems like it's one of those loves that everybody needs to experience at least once in their life.


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Invisiblepsi
TOAST N' JAM
Male User Gallery

Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613 Flag
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Crystal G]
    #19079057 - 11/03/13 07:12 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Crystal G said:
I really feel like typical American parents don't push their kids enough to excel in extracurricular activities such as music or sports, and this is something I am very adamant I will do.




My feeling is that quite a few do push their kids a lot regarding various things they'd like to see them do, often to the point of making the kid miserable. I'd like to see my kids play music as well for sure, but there's a chance it's something they just aren't going to be into. My thinking is to just have various instruments around (which I do already) and see if they show interest.



Quote:

Bill_Oreilly said:
My wife and beautiful son






My kids were both monsters this year too. :highfive1:


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: psi]
    #19079115 - 11/03/13 07:31 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

psi said:
My feeling is that quite a few do push their kids a lot regarding various things they'd like to see them do, often to the point of making the kid miserable. I'd like to see my kids play music as well for sure, but there's a chance it's something they just aren't going to be into. My thinking is to just have various instruments around (which I do already) and see if they show interest.




It depends heavily on the child's economic background. Parents of prestige and wealth typically overburden their kids with numerous activities and clubs, sometimes to the point of stressing their kid out so bad they end up having nervous breakdowns and a whole hoard of psychological problems later in life. But even many middle-class families, I've noticed many kids are raised playing maybe one sport in high school, and that's it. Parents never pushed them to study for PSAT's, or take up drama, or anything else.

The thing is though, most kids won't choose to do extracurricular activities or any type of educational "work" if they know they can get away with sitting around watching TV all day. If a normal kid is in a room with a video game console and a cello, they are almost always going to pick the video game.

It's not necessarily about whether they're into music or not either. Studies have shown that when you learn an instrument at a very young age, it opens pathways to brain cells that the person would ordinarily never use. Reading musical notes as practice develops the linguistic abilities in the brain, and makes it significantly easier for a person to learn a foreign language. This is something that children don't "get."

I feel that is the parent's responsibility to make their children talented in many things... so that when it comes time for them to be independent, they will have many options to choose from when they decide what they'd like to do in life. This is something that children do not understand until they are older, they really don't understand the value of what they are learning and how it will help them in the long run, so it is sometimes necessary to push kids in that direction.

Take me for example. I dreaded playing piano, I hated it as a kid, and literally had to be forced to practice every single day. I didn't like playing it until I was around age 16. For 10 whole years I hated it and begged my parents every single day to let me quit. But, if it weren't for my piano skills, I would never have gotten accepted into college. My high school grades were so bad during my teen rebellion years, and the only reason the university let me in was because they wanted to offer me a scholarship after they heard me play at my college audition. Excelling in even one extracurricular activity opens up many doors for somebody.

I used to go to Japanese school every Saturday. It was a school where we would learn math, history, politics, Japanese, etc. and all the classes would be taught in Japanese. They would teach us reading and writing Kanji. After years of hating it, my parents let me quit that in 6th grade. It wasn't until I grew up that I realized what a mistake that was, and how much better opportunities I would have had if I had been completely 100% fluent in a second language. But by then it was too late. I took Japanese as my language in high school and college to try to make up for it, and I'm still mostly pretty fluent, but not nearly as fluent as I would have been had I learned as a small child. I can speak small talk just fine, but I wouldn't be able to carry on a conversation about politics or art for example, or any subject that had technical terms involved.

You should be able to let them pick the TYPE of instrument or sports they want to play, but they should definitely be pushed to choose at least one of each. Just put it on the table that doing nothing is not an option.


Edited by Crystal G (11/03/13 07:56 AM)


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InvisibleSalomon
ಠ︵ಠ balance ಠ_ಠ weaver ಠ‿ಠ
Male
Registered: 01/17/09
Posts: 25,128
Loc: America, FUCK YEAH Flag
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Crystal G]
    #19079177 - 11/03/13 07:52 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

i wish i never had kids, miserable bastards all of them. many nights i thought of just throwing those fucks out a window. its a good thing i learned to just shake em hard so theyd' shut up





lol  like i really have kids. potentially having somebody living with me for 20 some odd years, while i support them to about all of it is not that appealing. plus that takes a huge chunk of time that i could be using to make magic crystals and robots. and it dosent help that i have some what fucked up genetics to pass on; my kids would either be super intelligent and physically strong or completely autistic or like have an extra toe coming out of thier ear or some fucked up shit.:loldongs:


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EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT



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Invisiblepsi
TOAST N' JAM
Male User Gallery

Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613 Flag
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Crystal G]
    #19079192 - 11/03/13 07:59 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

It's a balance for sure, and not everyone is going to have the same approach. Personally I'd love to see my kids start playing Irish traditional music like I do and much of my family does, but I want to avoid pushing them so much that they start to hate it. IMO the big pitfall is becoming too emotionally invested in having the kid succeed at a given thing.


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Invisiblepwnasaurus
Stranger
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 07/16/08
Posts: 12,317
Loc: Canada Flag
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: psi]
    #19079706 - 11/03/13 10:45 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

psi said:
It's a balance for sure, and not everyone is going to have the same approach. Personally I'd love to see my kids start playing Irish traditional music like I do and much of my family does, but I want to avoid pushing them so much that they start to hate it. IMO the big pitfall is becoming too emotionally invested in having the kid succeed at a given thing.



Do you have kids psi or is that your plan for when you do?


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Invisiblepsi
TOAST N' JAM
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Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613 Flag
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #19079806 - 11/03/13 11:05 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Yes, two boys. One is too small to play and the other has a disability that would make it difficult, but we do have a bunch of instruments already. Tenor banjo, tenor guitar, a couple regular guitars, a couple diatonic accordions, and a clarinet. I play tenor banjo/guitar "seriously" and kind of dabble with the other ones. I have family members who play some other ITM instruments as well.


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Offlinezappaisgod
horrid asshole


Registered: 02/11/04
Posts: 81,741
Loc: Fractallife's gym
Last seen: 7 years, 7 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Crystal G] * 1
    #19079838 - 11/03/13 11:13 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Crystal G said:
I'm in my late 20's and I do not plan on having children until I am married and we have both saved up at least a certain amount of money, and have been working in a stable career for a certain number of years. I would like to give the best to my children, including sending them to private school, giving them music lessons, and having them in sports and clubs, and those are all things that cost a lot of money. I really feel like typical American parents don't push their kids enough to excel in extracurricular activities such as music or sports, and this is something I am very adamant I will do.

If I do the math for only the music lessons (including instrument cost) and private schools alone, I'm guessing it would cost over to $30,000 a year.

From what I have heard about kids, it's very much a love/hate relationship. You friggin' HATE them cause they stress you out so bad all the time and wish they would STFU and stop annoying you and wish you had free time just so you could get a good night's sleep for once. But at the same time you LOVE them to death and would sacrifice your blood and go without eating just to do anything for them.

People have told me that the love that parents feel for their child is a love like no other. That it's indescribable. Based on what people have told me what it's like to hold their daughter or son for the very first time, it seems like it's one of those loves that everybody needs to experience at least once in their life.



Tiger Mom!


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InvisibleBill_Oreilly
ANIMALS (the RAINBOW SERPENT)


Registered: 11/12/11
Posts: 26,370
Loc: Boston
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: psi]
    #19079940 - 11/03/13 11:33 AM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

psi said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:
I really feel like typical American parents don't push their kids enough to excel in extracurricular activities such as music or sports, and this is something I am very adamant I will do.




My feeling is that quite a few do push their kids a lot regarding various things they'd like to see them do, often to the point of making the kid miserable. I'd like to see my kids play music as well for sure, but there's a chance it's something they just aren't going to be into. My thinking is to just have various instruments around (which I do already) and see if they show interest.



Quote:

Bill_Oreilly said:
My wife and beautiful son






My kids were both monsters this year too. :highfive1:





:rockon:


We actually went with 2 costumes because they were just so dang cute. The monster suit and a lion costume. It has a mane and a detachable tail :cool:

edit:




--------------------
Something there is mysteriously formed,
Existing before Heaven and Earth,
Silent, still, standing alone, unchanging,
All-pervading, unfailing,
I do not know its name; I call it tao.
If forced to give it a name, I call it
Great (ta). Being great, it flows out;
Flowing out means far-reaching;
Being far-reaching, it is said to return.


It's just a shot away..


Edited by Bill_Oreilly (11/03/13 12:58 PM)


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: zappaisgod]
    #19081315 - 11/03/13 04:42 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

zappaisgod said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:
I'm in my late 20's and I do not plan on having children until I am married and we have both saved up at least a certain amount of money, and have been working in a stable career for a certain number of years. I would like to give the best to my children, including sending them to private school, giving them music lessons, and having them in sports and clubs, and those are all things that cost a lot of money. I really feel like typical American parents don't push their kids enough to excel in extracurricular activities such as music or sports, and this is something I am very adamant I will do.

If I do the math for only the music lessons (including instrument cost) and private schools alone, I'm guessing it would cost over to $30,000 a year.

From what I have heard about kids, it's very much a love/hate relationship. You friggin' HATE them cause they stress you out so bad all the time and wish they would STFU and stop annoying you and wish you had free time just so you could get a good night's sleep for once. But at the same time you LOVE them to death and would sacrifice your blood and go without eating just to do anything for them.

People have told me that the love that parents feel for their child is a love like no other. That it's indescribable. Based on what people have told me what it's like to hold their daughter or son for the very first time, it seems like it's one of those loves that everybody needs to experience at least once in their life.



Tiger Mom!




I know right :lol:

But, the difference is, I would never ever hit my kids or discipline them roughly for failing to do their work. I would set up some type of system so that it influences them to feel psychologically "high" when they achieve the results that I ask. I think I'd be a lot more open-minded than other parents when it comes to teenage rebellion, and the type of behavior that I would accept when they reach these years.

Besides, I'm really not a tiger mom, since I'd only be asking my kids to take up ONE instrument and ONE sport. That's it. That's really not all that much, if you ask me.

My mom was a real tiger mom, and she had me involved in math club, Japanese Saturday school, swim team, golf team, piano, violin, orchestra, tennis club, basketball camps, soccer camps, equestrian-riding, etc. From 7AM to 11PM I never had any free time except these activities and studying, and was never allowed to watch TV or play with other children, and I never had a normal childhood. The only time I got to watch TV was when my mom was out of the house running errands, and I'd secretly sneak behind her back and watch Nickelodeon. I will admit, I really had a passion for equestrian-riding though.

They don't need to be prodigies in every single little thing. As long as they excel in ONE sport and ONE musical instrument and they get A's or even B's on their homework, that's good enough for me.


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Offlinezappaisgod
horrid asshole


Registered: 02/11/04
Posts: 81,741
Loc: Fractallife's gym
Last seen: 7 years, 7 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Crystal G] * 2
    #19081450 - 11/03/13 05:10 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Children are all different and I have bent like a reed in the wind.  Some need a nudge, some need a kick and some just need support.  Sometimes it doesn't matter what you do.

I do not think it is fair to demand that any single child excel at something if they are very good at a lot of things.  Renaissance children.  And many do not find heir niche until they get rid of us.  Did you?


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Offlinei like cow poo
Nature Lover
Male User Gallery

Registered: 10/20/09
Posts: 4,041
Loc: Mother Nature's Vagina
Last seen: 1 year, 3 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Romi]
    #19081457 - 11/03/13 05:12 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I'm never having kids, I got a vasectomy last spring and I couldn't be happier.
It makes no logical sense. There is already 7 billion people on this earth. Personally I don't trust humanity enough to create a creature that may suffer from the foolishness of our society. I can't hate on people who have more then one kid because its instinctual. However, I still think it is foolish to promote this uncontrollable population and mass consumption. We are a intelligent but foolish species.


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OfflineJesusIsLord
Jesus freak


Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 8,061
Last seen: 8 years, 8 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: Crystal G]
    #19081487 - 11/03/13 05:18 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Crystal G said:
Quote:

zappaisgod said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:
I'm in my late 20's and I do not plan on having children until I am married and we have both saved up at least a certain amount of money, and have been working in a stable career for a certain number of years. I would like to give the best to my children, including sending them to private school, giving them music lessons, and having them in sports and clubs, and those are all things that cost a lot of money. I really feel like typical American parents don't push their kids enough to excel in extracurricular activities such as music or sports, and this is something I am very adamant I will do.

If I do the math for only the music lessons (including instrument cost) and private schools alone, I'm guessing it would cost over to $30,000 a year.

From what I have heard about kids, it's very much a love/hate relationship. You friggin' HATE them cause they stress you out so bad all the time and wish they would STFU and stop annoying you and wish you had free time just so you could get a good night's sleep for once. But at the same time you LOVE them to death and would sacrifice your blood and go without eating just to do anything for them.

People have told me that the love that parents feel for their child is a love like no other. That it's indescribable. Based on what people have told me what it's like to hold their daughter or son for the very first time, it seems like it's one of those loves that everybody needs to experience at least once in their life.



Tiger Mom!




I know right :lol:

But, the difference is, I would never ever hit my kids or discipline them roughly for failing to do their work. I would set up some type of system so that it influences them to feel psychologically "high" when they achieve the results that I ask. I think I'd be a lot more open-minded than other parents when it comes to teenage rebellion, and the type of behavior that I would accept when they reach these years.

Besides, I'm really not a tiger mom, since I'd only be asking my kids to take up ONE instrument and ONE sport. That's it. That's really not all that much, if you ask me.

My mom was a real tiger mom, and she had me involved in math club, Japanese Saturday school, swim team, golf team, piano, violin, orchestra, tennis club, basketball camps, soccer camps, equestrian-riding, etc. From 7AM to 11PM I never had any free time except these activities and studying, and was never allowed to watch TV or play with other children, and I never had a normal childhood. The only time I got to watch TV was when my mom was out of the house running errands, and I'd secretly sneak behind her back and watch Nickelodeon. I will admit, I really had a passion for equestrian-riding though.

They don't need to be prodigies in every single little thing. As long as they excel in ONE sport and ONE musical instrument and they get A's or even B's on their homework, that's good enough for me.



sounds like you were spoiled. equestrian riding :lolsy:

also, the way you describe raising your kids sounds like how one would train a dog. sit boy, sit. good boy! here's a treat :derp:


--------------------


And I will bring you out from the people, and will gather you out of the countries wherein ye are scattered, with a mighty hand, and with a stretched out arm, and with fury poured out.


Edited by JesusIsLord (11/03/13 06:00 PM)


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Offlinezappaisgod
horrid asshole


Registered: 02/11/04
Posts: 81,741
Loc: Fractallife's gym
Last seen: 7 years, 7 months
Re: Do you have kids?! [Re: JesusIsLord]
    #19081670 - 11/03/13 05:53 PM (10 years, 2 months ago)

I don't think she was spoiled any more than she was tortured


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