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InvisibleTheShroomingAtheis
He's gone....


Registered: 12/31/11
Posts: 2,734
Need advice. :(
    #19039984 - 10/27/13 09:52 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Ok, last night got drunk, saw the girl I have known for some time(5+ years) which i'm in love with, got my drunk ass over to her, told her to follow me away from her friends, turned to her and bluntly said "I want you". She looked suprised and started asking, since when? and shit like that. She finally said " I will think about it, but this suprised me." and I left. Immediately I sent a text saying, sorry I was so straightfoward but I couldn't hold it in much longer. She then replied. It's ok, it's just that it suprised me. PLEASE HELP ME! What do I do now? what do i say to her? Did i get rejected big time. Please help...


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Invisiblekoraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,691
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: TheShroomingAtheis] * 2
    #19039997 - 10/27/13 09:58 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

She didn't jump onto you and fucked your brains out, so that's not a good sign. Just give her a day or so to mull it over and then send her another text. Try not to sound too desperate.


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Invisiblemandrax360
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Registered: 09/20/11
Posts: 1,980
Loc: Nelson Mandela House, Peckham Flag
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: koraks]
    #19040038 - 10/27/13 10:09 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Next time try being a bit more suttle like a date . I don't think you have blown it I just think you surprised her a bit to much .You where drunk and you blurted out I WANT YOU . This could be taken the wrong way .  :pedobearhide:


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OfflineIcepic
Enlightenment seeking


Registered: 05/20/02
Posts: 1,374
Loc: Wild west
Last seen: 9 years, 11 months
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: mandrax360] * 3
    #19040256 - 10/27/13 11:04 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Yeah starting relationships when your waisted usually doesn't work out so well, however some women like a man that is very assertive. I was with a buddy of mine at  grocery store and there was a nice looking lady in front of us in the checkout line. my buddy started talking to her and I wasn't paying much attention to what they were saying until I heard "so what's up with me beating it up?" I was like wtf I look over and old girl blushing making googley eyes at my friend, needless to say he went home with her and I had nobody to chill with. Weirdest shit I've seen in my life, well  maybe not weirdest but its up there.


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InvisibleFruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: Icepic] * 2
    #19040295 - 10/27/13 11:19 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Icepic said:
Yeah starting relationships when your waisted usually doesn't work out so well, however some women like a man that is very assertive. I was with a buddy of mine at  grocery store and there was a nice looking lady in front of us in the checkout line. my buddy started talking to her and I wasn't paying much attention to what they were saying until I heard "so what's up with me beating it up?" I was like wtf I look over and old girl blushing making googley eyes at my friend, needless to say he went home with her and I had nobody to chill with. Weirdest shit I've seen in my life, well  maybe not weirdest but its up there.



I had a friend do the same thing, just not quite as forward. We were at bar inside a bowling alley and we went down to the little snack shop to get some greasy food cause we were drunk. The girl working was cute as shit and the first thing he said was "You're beautiful, I want to kiss you" She immediately turned bright red and started to fan herself with her little order pad. He got her number


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OfflineIrfan
Stranger

Registered: 09/06/13
Posts: 180
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: TheShroomingAtheis]
    #19040424 - 10/27/13 11:54 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

I've done a similar thing quite a few times actually, only instead of saying anything I just go in for the kiss.

Talking about your premeditated feelings to her is actually harder to back yourself out of than a drunken kiss in the event that she rejects you.  See a kiss can be a split second stupid idea, letting her know you have feelings for her is very different and she knows it.  A kiss is also bold and confident, if it doesnt go well you can kind of play with her the next day and turn it around on her.

"What were you thinking kissing me like that last night!? We must have been trashed!  No more of that :smirk:"

My gut tells me this one wont go well for you.  I suggest you play it differently next time.

Ill probably get shit for this but I dont tell a girl how I feel about her untill after I have hooked up with her.  Telling her how you feel puts all your cards on the table.  From that point on she has all the power and makes all the rules.  I prefer to tease the attraction out by leaving her wondering if im into her or not.


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InvisibleTheShroomingAtheis
He's gone....


Registered: 12/31/11
Posts: 2,734
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: Irfan]
    #19041944 - 10/27/13 06:15 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

WHat should I say to her in my next text. I fucked this up bad! Please any advice is needed...


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OfflineIrfan
Stranger

Registered: 09/06/13
Posts: 180
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: TheShroomingAtheis]
    #19043200 - 10/27/13 10:47 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

You don't have any options that will just magically fix this...  Unless she is into you, which i doubt based on her reaction.
Im not good at fixing broken situations so i put most of my energy into not fucking them up to begin with, but if i was in your shoes my next text to her probably would not be for a while, and I would just pretend like nothing happened.  Text her something completely unrelated.  And not to hang out either, she may think your trying to corner her again and will dodge you..  I think you may have to build back up from this one slowly.  I hope im wrong though man, life is crazy, you never know whats going to happen.


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OfflineRzhoz
Just a guy
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Registered: 09/21/13
Posts: 144
Last seen: 1 year, 10 days
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: Irfan] * 1
    #19058767 - 10/30/13 05:03 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

If she's single, and you've known her for so long, you MIGHT get out of that horrid friend zone.

Also sounds like you were more intoxicated than her, bad start (jk)

Just stay real, don't lie, and be honest without being too foreward like last time

I knew this chick all through out high school, we were best friends, started dating in college, it was great for a while but things ended kinda bad. We realized we were better off as friends but that got fucked up and now we don't talk. Havnt in years.

I don't want to scare you or say you fucked up, cause you didn't. All I'm saying is be smart, honest and yourself and see where that gets you


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InvisibleTheShroomingAtheis
He's gone....


Registered: 12/31/11
Posts: 2,734
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: Rzhoz]
    #19061959 - 10/31/13 06:48 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Thanks man. So I send a text explaining myself and my feelings. She said it's nothing to worry about and that it is batter that I came up and talked to her. She also said that it suprised her a lot and that's why she wants to think about it for some time. This saturday I'll go talk to her face to face again, say some romantic things and such, and hopefully something good comes out of it. Also: we had a brief relationship when we first met but nothing serious...


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You gotta face the music!


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InvisibleSheekle
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Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: TheShroomingAtheis]
    #19062477 - 10/31/13 09:54 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Lol what do you expect her to say after you said "I want you" to her

Like what does that even mean when you get down to it? You like her as a person more than you like most people, and then? Who cares just mellow out and show her how cooler you are and maybe she'll start to want you to


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Edited by Sheekle (11/04/13 03:31 PM)


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InvisiblePsiLisaBin
Stranger<<<Strangest


Registered: 07/11/13
Posts: 128
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: Sheekle]
    #19062507 - 10/31/13 09:58 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

if a guy came up to me and said "i want you" and i was also feeling him...
we'd probably be fucking.
but maybe i'm just a hoe  :shrug:

this girl basically said "k, thanks for letting me know" and is keeping it moving.  i'd give it up, man.  believe it or not, most girls actually like having sex, so it's not something you need to con & talk your way into.  i wouldn't at all mind being approached how you described in your op ----- IF i was feeling the guy.


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Invisiblemandrax360
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Registered: 09/20/11
Posts: 1,980
Loc: Nelson Mandela House, Peckham Flag
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: PsiLisaBin]
    #19062527 - 10/31/13 10:03 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

PsiLisaBin I want You
:studmuffin:
You feeling me baby :grin:


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Invisiblekoraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,691
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: TheShroomingAtheis]
    #19062751 - 10/31/13 10:57 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

TheShroomingAtheis said:
she wants to think about it for some time.



So the feeling isn't mutual. You can save yourself the embarrassment of pretending to be a modern Romeo and move on, or you can find out the hard way how benevolent disinterest can turn into annoyance.


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InvisibleTheShroomingAtheis
He's gone....


Registered: 12/31/11
Posts: 2,734
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: koraks]
    #19063351 - 10/31/13 01:09 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Shit this goin to be hard. Letting it go and all.... But i Guess you guys are right...  I'm so confused when it comes girl psychology. The times I fucked were drunk bitches coming up to me. Never lovingly though..


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OfflineRzhoz
Just a guy
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Registered: 09/21/13
Posts: 144
Last seen: 1 year, 10 days
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: TheShroomingAtheis]
    #19063592 - 10/31/13 01:50 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

I wouldn't give up or anything but after your next face to face talk it should be clear whats going to happen.

Just keep a level head and I think it will turn out better than you think either way it goes


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OfflineBlack_Sunset
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Registered: 11/16/08
Posts: 2,451
Loc: Somewhere California
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: Rzhoz]
    #19070901 - 11/01/13 04:52 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

You have given her the power. Now she is going to string you along because you are making her think she is the desired one and not you. Talk again and be honest and FUN, and be aggressive. If she shuts you down just play it off like it doesn't hurt. Make her want you


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Offlineshimmeringtrance
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Registered: 10/22/13
Posts: 32
Loc: PNW 'where it rains'
Last seen: 10 years, 24 days
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: PsiLisaBin]
    #19077326 - 11/02/13 09:47 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

PsiLisaBin said: this girl basically said "k, thanks for letting me know" and is keeping it moving.  i'd give it up, man.  believe it or not, most girls actually like having sex, so it's not something you need to con & talk your way into.  i wouldn't at all mind being approached how you described in your op ----- IF i was feeling the guy.




^this^

Girls arent as complicated as you seem to think. But either way approaching someone you have a crush when you're drunk is almost always a bad idea. Espeically if you have no idea if they feel the same way.

In the future maybe take a sober approach when trying to find out if someone is interested. Not trying to be an ass, but that's how I see it.


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InvisibleTheShroomingAtheis
He's gone....


Registered: 12/31/11
Posts: 2,734
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: shimmeringtrance]
    #19078917 - 11/03/13 06:02 AM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Yeah, thanks. I let it go. For the better I hope!


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OfflineEnjoywho
Rags to Bitches
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Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
Re: Need advice. :( [Re: FruitOfLife]
    #19082363 - 11/03/13 08:07 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

FruitOfLife said:
Quote:

Icepic said:
Yeah starting relationships when your waisted usually doesn't work out so well, however some women like a man that is very assertive. I was with a buddy of mine at  grocery store and there was a nice looking lady in front of us in the checkout line. my buddy started talking to her and I wasn't paying much attention to what they were saying until I heard "so what's up with me beating it up?" I was like wtf I look over and old girl blushing making googley eyes at my friend, needless to say he went home with her and I had nobody to chill with. Weirdest shit I've seen in my life, well  maybe not weirdest but its up there.



I had a friend do the same thing, just not quite as forward. We were at bar inside a bowling alley and we went down to the little snack shop to get some greasy food cause we were drunk. The girl working was cute as shit and the first thing he said was "You're beautiful, I want to kiss you" She immediately turned bright red and started to fan herself with her little order pad. He got her number





At freaknight I was going up to every beautiful girl I saw and saying "I just wanted to say you are incredibly beautiful" so many were completely shocked. which is surprising because they were all incredibly hot.

I got SO MANY kisses, hugs, and dances from that. I must have told 750+ girls that in 16 hours over 2 nights. My phone is filled with numbers and I have no idea who any of them are :lol:


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"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

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