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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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As if things couldn't get any WORSE
#19018817 - 10/23/13 11:09 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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My boyfriend just told me, "I want to settle down with you, but a part of me wants to explore sexually" He's only been with like 5 other girls, and I'm the first one he's really gotten to "explore" so i should have seen this coming, right? Considering this is NOT the first time I've heard this from a boyfriend..
It's taking everything in me to not fucking relapse right now. or kill him.
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No day but today

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mylfgur
Untitled



Registered: 05/23/10
Posts: 1,282
Loc: Ohio
Last seen: 9 years, 1 month
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear] 1
#19018822 - 10/23/13 11:11 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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What do you want to do?
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incubis
Lighter


Registered: 10/30/10
Posts: 146
Loc: Dreamland
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: mylfgur]
#19018881 - 10/23/13 11:28 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Is he hinting something? Or it's time to move on to someone who's more mature.
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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
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Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: mylfgur]
#19018893 - 10/23/13 11:30 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
mylfgur said: What do you want to do?

I want to smash his fucking face in! But i can't do that. I can't always resort to violence. So what I'm going to do, is let him make the decision. Me, right now, forever. Or sexual exploration.
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No day but today

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Kittybear
Distroyed



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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: incubis]
#19018933 - 10/23/13 11:38 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
incubis said: Is he hinting something? Or it's time to move on to someone who's more mature. 
That's what I was thinking
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No day but today

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mylfgur
Untitled



Registered: 05/23/10
Posts: 1,282
Loc: Ohio
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19018941 - 10/23/13 11:40 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kittybear said:
Quote:
mylfgur said: What do you want to do?

I want to smash his fucking face in! But i can't do that. I can't always resort to violence. So what I'm going to do, is let him make the decision. Me, right now, forever. Or sexual exploration.
I mean, do you want to stay with him? Do you want to settle down with him?
It sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it too, i.e. go explore then come back and settle down with you. It doesn't sound to me like he wants to settle down right now.
But I could be wrong in my interpretation.
You two are gonna have some 'splaining to do.
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ZachariasEverlivin
Stranger

Registered: 10/22/13
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19018946 - 10/23/13 11:41 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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He likes you enough to be honest with you so be honest with him. Tell him you are uncomfortable with that idea. If you talk it through then hopefully you will both come to an agreement that satisfies you both.
Honesty and openness is the most important thing in any relationship. If he still wants to "explore" and you have an issue with that then go on a "break" and have a Ross/Rachel relationship :-)
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Kittybear
Distroyed



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Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: mylfgur]
#19018960 - 10/23/13 11:44 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
mylfgur said:
You two are gonna have some 'splaining to do.
your Lucy reference just made my day
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No day but today

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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Quote:
ZachariasEverlivin said: He likes you enough to be honest with you so be honest with him. Tell him you are uncomfortable with that idea. If you talk it through then hopefully you will both come to an agreement that satisfies you both.
Honesty and openness is the most important thing in any relationship. If he still wants to "explore" and you have an issue with that then go on a "break" and have a Ross/Rachel relationship :-)
I suggested breaking up. but he "loves me too much to do that". If he wants to go explore, why should I stop him from that? But I'm not just going to let him cheat on me. I think he knows that if we break up now, there's no getting back together again.
and it sounds exactly like he wants to have his cake and eat it too
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No day but today

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Sleepwalker
Overshoes

Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19019053 - 10/23/13 12:02 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kittybear said: and it sounds exactly like he wants to have his cake and eat it too
Sounds like he's not ready to settle. Doesn't mean he doesn't love you or anything.
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mpd
Lammen Gorthaur



Registered: 10/22/12
Posts: 9,660
Loc: Mostly at home... Mostly....
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19019074 - 10/23/13 12:07 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Get ready to receive the dump signal, OP. He's already moved on and is probably trying to find a way to keep you on a string along with some other girls. You can accept it or walk.
You have so much going for you Kittybear. Maybe this is your chance to find someone who is as dedicated to the relationship as you have been.
-------------------- There is no truer calling for mankind than that of true conservatism.
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Kittybear
Distroyed



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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Sleepwalker]
#19019126 - 10/23/13 12:19 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Sleepwalker said:
Quote:
Kittybear said: and it sounds exactly like he wants to have his cake and eat it too
Sounds like he's not ready to settle. Doesn't mean he doesn't love you or anything.
I NEVER asked him to settle down with me. He started the relationship, he drew me in. He pretty much moved me into his house. I fought with him for 3 or 4 months before i finally accepted the fact that i pretty much lived there. i didn't want any of this at first. Now that I'm comfortable, and I was starting to see a future with him, he drops this stupid bomb on me. do you see why I'm so pissed?
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No day but today

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Sleepwalker
Overshoes

Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19019146 - 10/23/13 12:23 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kittybear said: do you see why I'm so pissed?
Yes.
Still doesn't mean he hasn't been anything but honest with you. Maybe he didn't realize what he wanted until it was too late.
I don't know, I'm not him.
In any case, you should probably just move on but try to forgive him, for your own sake.
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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: mpd]
#19019159 - 10/23/13 12:26 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
mpd said: Get ready to receive the dump signal, OP. He's already moved on and is probably trying to find a way to keep you on a string along with some other girls. You can accept it or walk.
You have so much going for you Kittybear. Maybe this is your chance to find someone who is as dedicated to the relationship as you have been.
he's swearing up and down the only reason he's talking to me about this is because he wants to "ignore those urges so him and I can live happily together."
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No day but today

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The5thElement
Smile Friends :)



Registered: 07/01/12
Posts: 4,675
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Sleepwalker]
#19019160 - 10/23/13 12:26 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Kittybear, the good news is that I'm single
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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: The5thElement]
#19019169 - 10/23/13 12:28 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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No day but today

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The5thElement
Smile Friends :)



Registered: 07/01/12
Posts: 4,675
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19019180 - 10/23/13 12:32 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Dark_Star
train driver pervading a desktop


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,859
Loc: Uranus
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19019209 - 10/23/13 12:38 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Whatever happens here, please don't relapse. It won't solve your problems, and it won't make the feelings go away permanently either. They'll catch up to you eventually, and you'll have to deal with all of the fallout & problems from using on top of it. Just stay strong, and process whatever feelings you have. Painful as it may be, they'll go away quicker this way, and you'll grow as a result. You're an attractive young woman. You'll find someone else down the line. Take care of yourself & the odds of finding someone that will be really right for you increases dramatically.
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Sleepwalker
Overshoes

Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19019212 - 10/23/13 12:39 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kittybear said: he's swearing up and down the only reason he's talking to me about this is because he wants to "ignore those urges so him and I can live happily together."
Everyone has those urges, I'm sure there are other men that you would like to bang, but the fact that he mentioned it tells me that he still has some exploring to do. You should try to find someone who is in the same place as you as far as what you want from a relationship.
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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Sleepwalker]
#19019269 - 10/23/13 12:56 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Sleepwalker said:
Quote:
Kittybear said: he's swearing up and down the only reason he's talking to me about this is because he wants to "ignore those urges so him and I can live happily together."
Everyone has those urges, I'm sure there are other men that you would like to bang, but the fact that he mentioned it tells me that he still has some exploring to do. You should try to find someone who is in the same place as you as far as what you want from a relationship.
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No day but today

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Anonymous #1
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear] 1
#19019393 - 10/23/13 01:31 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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i use to be like your boyfriend o.p., only been with a couple girls before my current GF , and i told her the same thing at one point, but a couple things changed
1, , i realized months ago that i have a good thing going with her, so why bother ruining that
2, i even stopped looking at porn,its only been a about a week or 2, but it has reduced my fapping from like 2-4 times a day, to once every few days, and i get like 100X more turned on by her, i still get pervy thoughts if i see some cleavage on a chick or something on the street, but im hoping that will dissipate eventually(at least somewhat)
sounds like he is just not ready to settle down, i dont think you can convince him otherwise, he has to figure it out on his own
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Cheezymold
Wanderer



Registered: 09/30/13
Posts: 256
Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Anonymous #1]
#19023294 - 10/24/13 02:04 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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It sounds like he is still pretty young. If it bothers you that he said that, then you shouldn't stick around because you will probably resent him for it even if things do work out. If I were you, I would decide, instead of waiting for him to.
If you do stay because you genuinely want to, I would advise to not bring the subject up again unless he does. Just make like it never happened. After all, it took some guts to say something so bold and stupid.
Either way, I hope that you do not fall into addiction again. Smoke some bud, take a few days to calm down and think about it, then make a decision. Who knows, what you decide now could cause great happiness in your life
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CavemanJohnson
Real Classy

Registered: 11/11/07
Posts: 430
Loc: NorCal
Last seen: 9 years, 2 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Dark_Star]
#19023558 - 10/24/13 04:27 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Dark_Star said: Whatever happens here, please don't relapse. It won't solve your problems, and it won't make the feelings go away permanently either. They'll catch up to you eventually, and you'll have to deal with all of the fallout & problems from using on top of it. Just stay strong, and process whatever feelings you have. Painful as it may be, they'll go away quicker this way, and you'll grow as a result.
Wise words. If drastic actions must be made on your part then choose dumping him over relapsing for your own best interest.
You should definitely respect the fact he is being honest with you and trying to communicate. Its obvious an open relationship is out of the question for you. Its sounds like he's young and inexperienced and wants to go sow some wild oats which is totally natural, but he does not want to lose you and be alone. Perhaps he really cares about you, or conversely he just wants to keep you around until he can find a girl he wants more, which is totally selfish and a fucked up thing to put you through.
A few options: 1) Explore the idea of an open relationship, which neither of you sound interested in / mature enough for 2) Dump him 3) Stay with him, knowing that he's not ready to settle and may possible cheat on you
Either way, COMMUNICATE
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Heffy
BrauMeister



Registered: 08/30/04
Posts: 3,262
Loc: International Traveller
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19024001 - 10/24/13 05:12 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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You guys should have some crazy threesomes.
 Solves everything.
-------------------- I am the king of Rome, and above grammar! - Emperor Sigismund
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Murzelpfrumpft
pet donkey in a lucid dream

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1,855
Last seen: 1 month, 28 days
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Heffy]
#19024251 - 10/24/13 07:16 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Heffy said: You guys should have some crazy threesomes.
 Solves everything.
Actually this is very right and has been proven true. I'm sure I would have lost my precious very close relationship for minor reasons if we wouldn't do shit like that.
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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Heffy]
#19024446 - 10/24/13 08:32 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Heffy said: You guys should have some crazy threesomes.
 Solves everything.
Lol I've already put that option on the table. He says he doesn't want me to regret it later, but that will not happen. My only issue with that, is he thinks just because I like the ladies means that I'm experienced with them. He actually thinks I'm a lot more "experienced" than I am, just because I've been with twice as many people as he has. That's our problem.
I tried dumping him yesterday, but his exact words were "Idk what to work out. But I'm here. Willing to do anything to make you happy. And I'm not willing to leave you to cure my urges. I'd rather fight them, and I'd rather fight them with you."
and then we had insane make up sex. 
so i guess now my problem is, i have to be more aggressive and creative in the sack
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No day but today

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mpd
Lammen Gorthaur



Registered: 10/22/12
Posts: 9,660
Loc: Mostly at home... Mostly....
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19024496 - 10/24/13 08:53 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Problems can be solved. Sounds like you have a plan at least. Go forth and be fruitful!
-------------------- There is no truer calling for mankind than that of true conservatism.
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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: mpd]
#19024521 - 10/24/13 09:02 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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No day but today

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yogabunny
fancy cat



Registered: 11/01/09
Posts: 11,281
Loc: Nasty Women Get Shit Done
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19024630 - 10/24/13 09:37 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kittybear said:
Quote:
Sleepwalker said:
Quote:
Kittybear said: and it sounds exactly like he wants to have his cake and eat it too
Sounds like he's not ready to settle. Doesn't mean he doesn't love you or anything.
I NEVER asked him to settle down with me. He started the relationship, he drew me in. He pretty much moved me into his house. I fought with him for 3 or 4 months before i finally accepted the fact that i pretty much lived there. i didn't want any of this at first. Now that I'm comfortable, and I was starting to see a future with him, he drops this stupid bomb on me. do you see why I'm so pissed?
it sounds like you're more mad at yourself than him, for letting yourself get manipulated into this situation & settling for something you didn't even want in the first place. your bf sounds like a manipulative doucebag & i would get away ASAP and do some soul searching to figure out what you DO want from a relationship, and then NEVER settle until you get all that and more. It seems like the whole relationship runs based on what HE wants.
So, I ask, what do YOU want out of this or any relationship? what qualities matter to you in a partner? are you getting what you want out of of this relationship and does he possess these qualities?
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pwnasaurus
Stranger



Registered: 07/16/08
Posts: 12,317
Loc: Canada
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: yogabunny]
#19024695 - 10/24/13 09:56 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
pika* said:
Quote:
Kittybear said: I NEVER asked him to settle down with me. He started the relationship, he drew me in. He pretty much moved me into his house. I fought with him for 3 or 4 months before i finally accepted the fact that i pretty much lived there. i didn't want any of this at first. Now that I'm comfortable, and I was starting to see a future with him, he drops this stupid bomb on me. do you see why I'm so pissed?
it sounds like you're more mad at yourself than him, for letting yourself get manipulated into this situation & settling for something you didn't even want in the first place. your bf sounds like a manipulative doucebag & i would get away ASAP and do some soul searching to figure out what you DO want from a relationship, and then NEVER settle until you get all that and more. It seems like the whole relationship runs based on what HE wants.
So, I ask, what do YOU want out of this or any relationship? what qualities matter to you in a partner? are you getting what you want out of of this relationship and does he possess these qualities?

Great advice.
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Anonymous #2
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: pwnasaurus]
#19025278 - 10/24/13 12:03 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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I think he was trouble when he walked in. I'm a guy so I know how men work, not only am I a guy, but i'm bi-sexual as well. But hey, every guy is different, so I might be wrong.
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pwnasaurus
Stranger



Registered: 07/16/08
Posts: 12,317
Loc: Canada
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Anonymous #2]
#19025459 - 10/24/13 12:44 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said: I think he was trouble when he walked in. I'm a guy so I know how men work, not only am I a guy, but i'm bi-sexual as well. But hey, every guy is different, so I might be wrong.
This post makes no sense.
"He was in trouble when he walked in" - what are you even referring to?
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Heffy
BrauMeister



Registered: 08/30/04
Posts: 3,262
Loc: International Traveller
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19026186 - 10/24/13 02:53 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
so i guess now my problem is, i have to be more aggressive and creative in the sack

Good girlfriends are hard to find.
-------------------- I am the king of Rome, and above grammar! - Emperor Sigismund
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Kittybear
Distroyed



Registered: 06/12/12
Posts: 178
Loc: Kansas, USA
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Heffy]
#19026219 - 10/24/13 02:58 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Heffy said:
Quote:
so i guess now my problem is, i have to be more aggressive and creative in the sack

Good girlfriends are hard to find. 
How does one show dominance when they would rather be the submissive? I literally feel like I have to study for this. I have been watching a lot of weird porn lately..
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No day but today

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Heffy
BrauMeister



Registered: 08/30/04
Posts: 3,262
Loc: International Traveller
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19026296 - 10/24/13 03:11 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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-------------------- I am the king of Rome, and above grammar! - Emperor Sigismund
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Anonymous #3
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear] 1
#19026691 - 10/24/13 04:33 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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take all that anger you felt towards him when he told you he wanted to explore sexually with other people to hurt him in the bedroom, share the pain he made you feel with him.
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trekie
Metal man


Registered: 05/11/09
Posts: 11,085
Loc: Larger cities
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Kittybear]
#19026822 - 10/24/13 05:04 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Threesomes won't help a shit relationship in prepare for if you do.
Threesomes can be had and are tons of fun for very few people who trust and are open with there partners.
Don't be delusionly.
-------------------- I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
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Konyap

Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: trekie]
#19029223 - 10/25/13 12:45 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
trekie said: Threesomes won't help a shit relationship in prepare for if you do.
Threesomes can be had and are tons of fun for very few people who trust and are open with there partners.
Don't be delusionly.
That's just western mentality. I notice girls act like they own their boyfriend, it's funny to watch. He doesn't have a ring on and yet she gets so insecure. It's probably that sexy jealousy thing everyone raves about.
Edited by Konyap (10/25/13 12:45 AM)
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CidneyIndole
www.shroomery.OG



Registered: 05/16/05
Posts: 4,761
Loc: Love's Secret Domain
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: Anonymous #3] 2
#19035502 - 10/26/13 12:35 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kittybear said:
Quote:
mylfgur said: What do you want to do?

I want to smash his fucking face in! But i can't do that. I can't always resort to violence. So what I'm going to do, is let him make the decision. Me, right now, forever. Or sexual exploration.
This may not be what you want to hear, but just keep in mind that when you give someone an ultimatum, there is a chance they will say "fine, it's over."
I've been in that situation before. On the "fine, it's over" side. Though in my case it was about drugs, of course, not "infidelity."
Quote:
Kittybear said: It's taking everything in me to not fucking relapse right now. or kill him.
Why? Do you assume that just because he has interest in sex with other girls, that he somehow doesn't love you, or thinks of you as less? That's not necessarily the case at all. Some people have wandering eyes and a curious mind. Especially if their experience is more limited.
But really, these feelings are quite natural. IMO it's considerably more rare (for males or females, but especially males) to be with one partner and never, EVER fantasize or think / wonder about sex with another. This is one of the many reasons porn is so popular-- because it allows this kind of thing without actually being physically unfaithful.
Are you one of those girls who freaks out when your BF watches porn?
And the fact that you've thought about / threatened relapse is not a good sign. From what I can tell, it seems like you place a lot into your relationship. And while that can be understandable (I am very much this way too) it can be unhealthy if taken too far. Perhaps look up some literature on "co dependence." As this response of "I'm going to do something destructive" or even wanting to, fits right in with the pattern of being a "co-dependent." And we can usually smell our own. No offense intended.
Quote:
Kittybear said: I suggested breaking up. but he "loves me too much to do that". If he wants to go explore, why should I stop him from that? But I'm not just going to let him cheat on me.
Just to point out, and I'm sure from the way you're writing this would probably never happen, but if you talked about it, and agreed that he could be sexual with outside parties, that is not "cheating." That is "an 'open' relationship." Some people actually do this. Some people even see it as being overly-possessive to insist that your partner can only be physical with you. Hell, some people consider it possessive that your partner should only be allowed to have romantic / emotional feelings with you. And I really can see both sides of this argument, though I think I'd personally have a much harder time with my partner being actually romantic with another.
But really.... isn't that kind of the fear with "cheating?" That he's going to hook up with someone else, and what starts out as physical, moves beyond that and next thing you know, he's gone? I could be entirely projecting here, so please do correct me if I'm wrong. But what if it weren't that? What if it were just sex? Why would that upset you? I think no matter what you decide to do on this, it might be very well worth your time to explore these issues and thoughts and feelings on your own.
Or this one: What does it mean to love? Is not part of that wanting the most happiness for your partner? When I think of this in context to open sexuality, I usually think of the old cliche saying: "If you love something, let it go..."
Of course, if sleeping with people and exploring sexually is what makes him happy, and being 100% faithful and committed to one person is what makes you happiest, you may be having a genuine compatibility problem.
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Kittybear said: he's swearing up and down the only reason he's talking to me about this is because he wants to "ignore those urges so him and I can live happily together." 
IDK why you'd assume that. He could be sincere. Most guys who just want to cheat and don't give a shit about you, are not going to be honest about something like this, they know could upset you. That's just not how heartless cheaters work, IME.
Like I said, those feelings can be very normal for some people. And when you feel deeply connected /attached and committed to someone, such feelings can be unsettling. If you're a very honest person, talking about it might seem like the natural solution. Just saying....
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Kittybear said: He actually thinks I'm a lot more "experienced" than I am, just because I've been with twice as many people as he has. That's our problem.
Not quite sure what you were trying to say there, but from what I can tell... that is sort of what that means. More partners / more sex = more experienced. Am I missing something?
I also think the threesome could be a good idea. Who knows, maybe that's what he was trying to suggest in the first place with all this, in a roundabout kind of way.
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Anonymous said: take all that anger you felt towards him when he told you he wanted to explore sexually with other people to hurt him in the bedroom, share the pain he made you feel with him.
Maybe it's just the way you worded this, or maybe it's just me.... but this really made you sound kind of like a vindictive psycho.
-------------------- ------------------------ I am me. We are You.
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Cyclohexylamine
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Registered: 09/08/10
Posts: 14,327
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Re: As if things couldn't get any WORSE [Re: CidneyIndole]
#19037937 - 10/26/13 09:15 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Good post CidneyIndole
-------------------- Yes this is tymo - I just changed my name Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to awake from that dream? How would you know the difference between that dream world and the real world? There is NOTHING better than feeling that warm dissociative fuzz creeping up your body from IM K Something abut that anaesthetic rush... Qualitative Research Chemical Effects and Experiences The Wonderful World of Methoxetamine The 3-Meo-PCP Chapters, Part One
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