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SattvaBodhi
nobody

Registered: 08/09/13
Posts: 392
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Someone to talk with
#18997908 - 10/18/13 11:00 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I am in a completely new town where I do not know anyone, and all I want is someone to bounce my fears off of. This is a strange thing we got going on here and I do not really have that someone, I cannot do that with my wife because I have to be strong for her and our son. I do not necessarily want to bitch just someone to tell my fears. Once I get them off my chest I can let them go.
Being in a new town is different when you have a family to think about opposed to just being alone with one duffel bag.
Someone I met here is doing something really nice for me and I am thankful for that!
Namaste SB
-------------------- My ETSY shop .. stop by and look ***Disclaimer*** Everything I say in my posts is false. I have never done any drugs nor will I ever. Drugs are bad mmkay.
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Dudits
Tao


Registered: 09/16/13
Posts: 233
Loc: West coast
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That's how I feel, even though I've lived in the same town my whole life. Just on a different wave length then the people i live around. I think i was meant to live around Santa Cruz, or Mendocino. I think i would fit in well there.
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Spacerific
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Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 4,923
Last seen: 8 years, 10 months
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Start jogging, be outside, look to make some new acquaintances to train with, then you can also start talking about your stuff. Even if you find nothing, physical training takes away some of the stress.
Alternatively, find a secluded space, take a camera (a phone camera will do) and talk into it, verbalize your feelings like you would in a youtube video. Get them on the cam, watch them, you'll find that many (most) of them lose all wind once they're spoken out loud, and the ones who don't are at least clarified.
Some people write and journal, I found it to be way more effective to actually talk, pace, let it all out verbally. Cameras do help at least in my experience. Oh and parked cars offer good sound insulation. Take a cam, pull over, start rolling and talking.
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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Epigallo
Stranger
Registered: 09/17/06
Posts: 8,155
Last seen: 6 years, 11 months
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Do you want to talk on here, or are you trying to find someone in person to talk to? What are your concerns?
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Sleepwalker
Overshoes

Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
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Why can't you talk to your wife? To be strong?
It's not like you have to cry in front of her, just bounce your concerns? Shouldn't you be on the same page with her when it comes to what could go right or wrong in your new situation?
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SattvaBodhi
nobody

Registered: 08/09/13
Posts: 392
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We do talk but if I just vomited a bunch of fears on her I think it would just activate her fears and we would both be creating from a place of fear. WE talk all the time about everything, and she has already heard all these fears it just helps me to have a friend in the city. I have met a few people and the shop owners are nice, ya know. I just gets to feelin lonely in a new town sometimes.
-------------------- My ETSY shop .. stop by and look ***Disclaimer*** Everything I say in my posts is false. I have never done any drugs nor will I ever. Drugs are bad mmkay.
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SattvaBodhi
nobody

Registered: 08/09/13
Posts: 392
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Re: Someone to talk with [Re: Spacerific]
#18998939 - 10/19/13 09:34 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Thank you. I have been walking to different places and I just talk to myself and it helps a bit. I bet I look crazy walking down the street talking to myself. lol.
-------------------- My ETSY shop .. stop by and look ***Disclaimer*** Everything I say in my posts is false. I have never done any drugs nor will I ever. Drugs are bad mmkay.
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Spacerific
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Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 4,923
Last seen: 8 years, 10 months
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Quote:
SattvaBodhi said: Thank you. I have been walking to different places and I just talk to myself and it helps a bit. I bet I look crazy walking down the street talking to myself. lol.
Film it man, film it on a camera and then watch it. Then you can talk about the same problem again WITH the insights you got while hearing the problem, and this will significantly lower your fears.
Hearing them out loud, spoken and taken from the back of your head, being named and identified, this takes a lot of the edge away.
People pay big $$$ so they can do this with a therapist, when at least 50% of it they could do with a camera by themselves, if not more. But you have to actually do it, not just think about it in your head.
Find a place, talk into a camera, listen to it, repeat once or twice, and then delete everything. Or keep it and compare next week's talk to this week's. You'll see A LOT of the fears have subsided, as you gained more insights.
What matters is that loop of taking fears from the back of your head, to outside, being processed verbally, spoken and heard. THen other parts of your brain can process them and throw in some support.
Try it out. And NOT on the street, find somewhere private where you can actually think. Ideally you'd need to be able to walk around as well, and do free hand gestures, a lot of emotion we process by physical movement.
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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