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OfflinePatlal
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Do you find dating annoying? * 1
    #18976794 - 10/14/13 02:07 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

There's always that game nobody wants to play that everybody plays. It's annoying. It's a waste of time. To me, after the first date I'd ask directly if she wants to be my girlfriend, but I can't do that cause the unwritten dating rules states that I would look needy, which leads to the other unwritten rule she has to follow, which is to not date someone that looks needy. How fun. Instead let's just wait 3 days before contacting each other again even though we both want to talk the day after if the date went well.

Recently I've been to a few dates and I kinda took them as tests. I've been on 2 dates that weren't really good (as in, I knew we would never see each other again) so I asked at the end of the date "So, what did you think of me? Was it a good date or a bad date?" The first one said: "let's keep it a mystery" and the other said "oh yeah I had fun!". I knew for a fact it sucked for both of us and yet neither of them had the balls to tell the truth even if I directly asked them. Sure, it spares my feeling, I get it. But then again, what if I really liked them? One would have left me wondering and the other would have raised my hopes up for nothing. Talk about fucking with someone's head.

Then there's that online thing. The slot machine of dating. You need to write to a hundred girls to get one to answer and you have to write a creative message that is not too short and not too long, with a couple questions that relates to her profile, but not too many and yet still find a way to stick out from the other hundred messages she received and not look like a weirdo in the process.

Is it like that for everybody?


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Edited by Patlal (10/14/13 02:13 PM)


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal]
    #18976808 - 10/14/13 02:10 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Yeah I've pretty much given up on pursuing dating. It's not really a process I tend to enjoy all that much. If I meet the right person, I meet them, but yeah I'm pretty tired of the whole game and have never been very good at it in the first place.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal]
    #18976831 - 10/14/13 02:16 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Patlal said:

To me, after the first date I'd ask directly if she wants to be my girlfriend, but I can't do that cause the unwritten dating rules states that I would look needy,




:lol:

That's not "looking needy" that's being needy. Personally all I want from sexual relationships is dating or less, emotionally speaking I am thus not needy.

I agree about online dating though, its a mindless ego vacuum. Much more fun to meet people in person.


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Invisiblerackem
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal]
    #18976836 - 10/14/13 02:17 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

thats a fucking awesome right on the head outlook on dating.

and to add, what you can and can not do on a first date.

cant go here, thats like a 3rd date thing, blah blah blah.


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OfflineTheStormsEye
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal]
    #18976851 - 10/14/13 02:21 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Patlal said:


Is it like that for everybody?




mostly, I would believe..  but why did you think the dates sucked?
ive been on "dates" that I thought sucked but the girl actually had a great time..

..sucking, jk.

haha.  but really though, what makes you think they sucked?


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              All mushrooms are edible.. some only once


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Offlinekakashi68
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? *DELETED* [Re: TheStormsEye]
    #18976899 - 10/14/13 02:34 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Post deleted by kakashi68

Reason for deletion: a



--------------------
You know, just sometimes in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that 400th glass of cornershop piss at 3am--you do sometimes look at yourself and think--this is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
-Bernard Black



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OfflineTheStormsEye
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: kakashi68]
    #18976912 - 10/14/13 02:38 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

..and choose the "no receipt" option


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              All mushrooms are edible.. some only once


Edited by TheStormsEye (10/14/13 02:39 PM)


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OfflineThe Ecstatic
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: TheStormsEye]
    #18976927 - 10/14/13 02:41 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Dating blows.

I enjoy the couple months grace period where you're comfortable, but before the obnoxious expectations come into play. then you gtfo


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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: The Ecstatic]
    #18976956 - 10/14/13 02:48 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

The Ecstatic said:
Dating blows.

I enjoy the couple months grace period where you're comfortable, but before the obnoxious expectations come into play. then you gtfo




Exactly how I feel, its fun when its new and then its time to bail. Most of the time I've been the one who was guilty of setting up expectations and shit, eventually I got fed up with caring so much and found the glory that is being a bachelor.
Those first two months are all I want


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal] * 1
    #18977023 - 10/14/13 03:05 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Let's get philosophical here for a minute. What would actually change if a chick said "yes I'll be your girlfriend"? Is saying yes to that question an unspoken commitment to start spending a lot of her time with you? What purpose does putting such a label on whatever connection you two may share serve?

Why is there some rule in our society that says we should only open ourselves up emotionally to one other person, and keep ourselves closed up to everybody else? :strokebeard:

Does having sex with somebody make them different than a "friend"?


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


Edited by Sheekle (10/14/13 03:12 PM)


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Invisible4runner
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Repertoire89]
    #18977073 - 10/14/13 03:17 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Dating, what's that?

I don't think I have ever been on a true date where you ask some gal out.

Weird.


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OfflineSoreSpore
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Sheekle]
    #18977097 - 10/14/13 03:20 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

are you into guys, girls or something else?


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Offlinedrkkenny
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal] * 2
    #18977124 - 10/14/13 03:25 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Honestly I'd rather not get involved with all that goes into dating someone, usually the person you find "irresistible" is only playing some sort of role which ends with you getting "played" as you said earlier. Really, most relationships are utter rubbish anyways, solitude pays off much better. What is the point of dating someone whom you cannot relate with in anyway? There is a certain singularity to certain aspects of my personality which is otherwise declared to be something defective in the manner I act in the real world, which, in most woman whom would rather have some Tom Dick and Harry than someone with "exceptional" cognitive ability. I've noticed most woman find the exceedingly intelligent males to be the worse to date, mainly because they realize that we create many "tall tales". Y'know we like to get in their heads, we will completely fabricate some slight detail to an extent which might make them feel smothered by our "strong" personality.

I have seen it before, I will date a girl for a week and then they will all of a sudden abandon in favor for some random person they met at the store. It could also be because I "obsess" about them to such an extent that makes them feel I'm "insane". They think that the insanity entails that by revealing aspects of myself which aren't attributed to sanity to be conceived as the theory of insanity. Indeed, it seems to me that most woman want a guy that won't give them enough. They want someone who just gives them enoguh so they feel adequate for awhile, but in reality most women deserve and are entitled to a great deal more than they are getting, I know this, I see this, I see couples whom walk together without saying a word to each other, no food for thought there, not at all. "sometimes", sometimes, that happens. That is usually the case when they are both highly attractive.

So you go up to them and you ask them, and perhaps in a way that might suggest that you are being over friendly but which is actually just because you wanted to discover how they kept it together for so long, and you abruptly exclaim: "How in the world have you been together for years without splitting up!?" And the answer usually consists of "because we both are empty and hollow, we have nothing to talk about, we have our hearts which is more than enough for us to prosper" Indeed, it seems to be fairly apparent that to have a successful relationship you must just smile and pretend that everything is perfect, well, for myself, I have a different way of looking at things.

I also want a girl who can challenge my wits, someone that I can really speak to, many woman haven't a thought in their minds so that is where I come in for I have many abstractions I'd bet they'd be interested in.

Now you say that you aren't fond of this game, that it sickens you in a way. Well you must first realize that you are inventing this woman. She is only a part of your imagination so you color her features with your mind. Essentially she becomes a sort of portrait that you are creating of her, you customize how you want her to be, and that's where it's rather fun because you can really mess with her head that way...I know if I transferred the way I perceive the world with a girl then she'd have to deal with the never ending amount of dialogue that overlaps my day to day life, she would see her thoughts increase to such an amount which would probably cause a burden on the way she interacts with people.

Girls usually don't want a creeper such as myself, they can see we pay way too much attention to the small things others might overlook and because we see things in a way that might suggest we are looking too close, we do things so that by the time they happen they appear to have been prepared with only her in mind....

I'm mostly a misogynist though, I can't stand woman for the sheer fact that they would rather date some idiot rather than someone who genuinely is interesting and has much to offer to the world, they find us too strange and otherworldly to tolerate, we become so involved with the intricate systems which are unraveling themselves at each moment in life that we will scare them away. We will say something which could have been said much easier than the way we said it but we still say it in a way that makes the thing we said appear to have been superfluous combined with elements which could have been easier said without them being revealed.

I suppose I'm still waiting for the "one" person I can really relate to(haha). I highly doubt I will find her for awhile but maybe I will find one at a library someday. I need someone with those quirky characteristics that I have myself so that we both can somewhat combine them and we'll both rub our weirdness on each other.


--------------------

No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry They Washed Away // No More Stories, The World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Let's Wash Away.


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InvisibleDawks
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal] * 1
    #18977148 - 10/14/13 03:30 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

I actually like dating. It's when you get to find out if she's worth your time or a complete cunt. If she's awesome than 3 dates is nothing but fun and more fun, if she's not than no need to go on more than one, just ask someone else.

Plus getting to know new people has always been one of my most favorite things in life. I'd much rather chat to someone in a park than read even the most epic novel. So many stories to be told and adventures to be had.


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date ; unzip ; strip ; touch ; grep ; finger ; mount ; fsck ; more ; yes ; umount ; sleep


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: drkkenny]
    #18977185 - 10/14/13 03:37 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

drkkenny said:
Well you must first realize that you are inventing this woman. She is only a part of your imagination so you color her features with your mind. Essentially she becomes a sort of portrait that you are creating of her, you customize how you want her to be, and that's where it's rather fun because you can really mess with her head that way...




Ya know drkkenny I could understand where you're coming from with the rest of your post except this part, can you elaborate?


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Offlinedrkkenny
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Dawks] * 1
    #18977191 - 10/14/13 03:38 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

I've written my fair share of romantic short stories and believe me when I tell you, most people I've spoken to whom have read them say they seem much more romantic than the real thing... That should be fairly obvious though for the simple fact that we can capture so much more on paper than we can by speaking. So even though I've never fallen in love I can say that I'm fully prepared for when it happens since, in a way I've already "lived" it. I've experienced it, but only through a different medium which isn't the real thing. Though obviously the real experience is also extremely important for "there is nothing like the real thing".


--------------------

No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry They Washed Away // No More Stories, The World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Let's Wash Away.


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InvisibleDawks
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: drkkenny] * 2
    #18977195 - 10/14/13 03:38 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

drkkenny said:
:blah:





Jesus dude I wouldn't want to date you either with "me against the world" monologue crap. You certainly don't come across as "highly intelligent" just extraordinarily self centered.

I prescribe you a solid dose of MDMA at a nice outdoor festival.


--------------------
date ; unzip ; strip ; touch ; grep ; finger ; mount ; fsck ; more ; yes ; umount ; sleep


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Offlinedrkkenny
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Sheekle]
    #18977223 - 10/14/13 03:44 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Well you are going to be playing a large role in her life, certain aspects of your personality are going to be applied into hers, that is why in a way she becomes your pet project. Y'know that one song by REM, "The one I love?" that line, "a simple prop to occupy my time". That pretty much sums up part of what I said. She becomes a prop that you are using to experiment with, since a male will usually play the dominant role in a relationship(except in the off chance she is a dominatrix, which is actually what I want lol). Whoever this woman used to be will no longer be present, everything she was before she met you will dissolve and become a part of yourself. Now if she resists to this "forced" experiment then and only then might she be able to save part of who she used to be, but if she stays with someone for long enough she will most likely become nearly identical to them.

There's more I want to say on this part but I'm running short of time so will try to clarify as much as possible...
Ah I'm out of time :c at the library about to close..

maybe next time I get on I will edit it bc its rather important.


--------------------

No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry They Washed Away // No More Stories, The World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Let's Wash Away.


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: drkkenny] * 2
    #18977236 - 10/14/13 03:46 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

I don't think that's a very healthy relationship if one person loses who they were before because of it, that doesn't seem all too common either.


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Invisiblebadchad
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Patlal] * 1
    #18977287 - 10/14/13 03:58 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

it might help if you consciously tried to take things less seriously.  I enjoy(ed) dating. It's always fun getting to know someone and (often times), having a few laughs over a drink or two.  You never know when someone might call or text, and I've met a lot of interesting people dating.

Think of it as a brief lunch, or dinner.  Don't read into it any more than that.


--------------------
...the whole experience is (and is as) a profound piece of knowledge.  It is an indellible experience; it is forever known.  I have known myself in a way I doubt I would have ever occurred except as it did.

Smith, P.  Bull. Menninger Clinic (1959) 23:20-27; p. 27.

...most subjects find the experience valuable, some find it frightening, and many say that is it uniquely lovely.

Osmond, H.  Annals, NY Acad Science (1957) 66:418-434; p.436


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: badchad]
    #18977350 - 10/14/13 04:17 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

badchad said:
it might help if you consciously tried to take things less seriously.  I enjoy(ed) dating. It's always fun getting to know someone and (often times), having a few laughs over a drink or two.  You never know when someone might call or text, and I've met a lot of interesting people dating.

Think of it as a brief lunch, or dinner.  Don't read into it any more than that.



q f t


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Invisiblerackem
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: Sheekle]
    #18977357 - 10/14/13 04:19 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

if she dont poke.. whats the point of spending money on a quick dinner?


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OfflineThe Ecstatic
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Re: Do you find dating annoying? [Re: rackem]
    #18977495 - 10/14/13 05:01 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Sheekle you're out of your element.


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