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Apostle
Philanthropist



Registered: 12/12/09
Posts: 31,501
Loc: FL
Last seen: 1 year, 23 days
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Quote:
sVs said: Blame yourselves. That's the one person truly accountable.
i'd never blame anyone else. at least not seriously.
Maybe a rant or two against big pharma but i know its my choice to indulge etc...
I'm happier now adays and i have a lot less. i don't even have a house or ten bucks to my name but shit is better than when i had a bunch of ill gotten money to spoil my receptors with.
now i appreciate my highs alot more and roll with the lows as if they were a good thang.
i will admit though it kind of takes away from the experience, having to be responsible, especially with hard drugs. since i no longer accept daily use as an option when i do blast off i am always trying to hold onto the feeling.
i know you mean well though. just thought id share. even H and Coke etc.. CAN be enjoyed responsibly but they are so much more fun when you have nothing to live for. now that i respect my life its like i almost feel guilty when i use H ard droogs.
well ima stop before i ramble on
sing my song
ooh ahh.
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SprewellSleeve



Registered: 03/15/09
Posts: 6,315
Loc: USA
Last seen: 17 hours, 11 minutes
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Quote:
claraclairvoyant said:
Quote:
SprewellSleeve said: Eat cage free eggs, regular oatmeal (because of no sugar) with chopped bananas and squeeze fresh lemons on the bananas and oatmeal (especially the bananas, and drink it with hot tea. I finished drinking peppermint tea from Celestial Seasonings a little bit ago. Still feel fresh and amazing (took a shower with Dr. Bronner's organic peppermint soap bar which is also amazing).
Some other tea I like are green tea, green tea with lemon (I'd still squeeze lemon in there), blueberry tea, blackberry tea, etc.
Squeezing fresh lemons in water also makes my tummy feel warm and fuzzy a while.
oh wow, i didn't realize getting my shit together would be so easy!
He's living off McDonald's, it probably would make him feel so much better.
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Legend
RIP Sasha



Registered: 03/29/10
Posts: 28,336
Loc: TX
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yeah, a healthy diet, exercise, and a decent sleeping schedule will do wonders. As well as ceasing the hard drug use. zee, i totally recommend only using stimulants when you absolutely need them. i warn you though, you'll feel like shit for a few weeks. Pick up the poly drug use when your life is more stable, just use them as tools for now. i've been in that situation before man, and even though i do not have it all together right now. Im sure as hell on my way. Good luck, you can do this.
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No sympathy for the devil, keep that in mind. [url=]Buy the ticket, take the ride. [/url]Are you lost?
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: zee007] 1
#18946090 - 10/07/13 06:21 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Zee you know you can always PM me if you feel the need to vent your thoughts out to someone, I won't approach anything you say with anything less than an open mind and a complete lack of judgement.
A few years back I used to be hella depressed nd paranoid, my world perspective was grim and thinking that nothing would ever change. These days I think I'm a pretty well-rounded put together person, things do change
It'll all be okay. I think recognizing that there's problems you need to deal with says you're off better than a lot of people.
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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fapjack
Title



Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: zee007] 1
#18946176 - 10/07/13 06:43 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Go to a detox and try and get some clean time, otherwise you are just putting off the inevitable. Why live that lifestyle, if you really want to get your shit together just stop and try and make some serious changes. Its like every drug addict (me included) I have ever met wants to do the least possible and wants the best outcome. Kicking is fucking hard, and it requires some serious fucking commitment. Personally, I would rather have a few months clean time living homeless eating out of soup kitchens than having drugs completely control my life and my finances. Some people need to be willing to give up everything to get clean, guess it depends on how much you want it. I had a problem with opiates though, which is completely different than a marijuana/benzos/adderall addiction.
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ManianFH
living in perverty


Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,741
Last seen: 34 minutes, 47 seconds
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: zee007] 1
#18946319 - 10/07/13 07:13 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Id like to think ive got it together. Drug free, which is probably the biggest contributor to the success of my every day. That includes no alcohol or tobacco. Just healthy homecooked food, exercise, lots of me-time, time with my girlfriend, and work. things are going good, and im happy with and accept who I am, have been for a very long time, regardless of my faults and/or mistakes I make.
The probation will go away. The insomnia will probably go away. Just try to start taking care of your body and things will usually get better. Stop eating that god-awful fast food if youd like to start feeling better. Fruits, Veggies, and protein such as Fish (helps fight depression), chicken, eggs. If you want some good recipes let me know. Shit is way more affordable and tastes about 100x better than any fast food you could buy.
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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Nimpo
Big Black


Registered: 05/10/12
Posts: 2,375
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: ManianFH] 1
#18946327 - 10/07/13 07:15 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Im keeping it together because Im an adult with responsibilities.
But you can bet your fucking ass that if I didnt need to pay any bills and could live life without any responsibilities, Id be balls deep in heavy drugs. Or Id prob be dead because of the drugs.
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Apostle
Philanthropist



Registered: 12/12/09
Posts: 31,501
Loc: FL
Last seen: 1 year, 23 days
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: fapjack]
#18946332 - 10/07/13 07:16 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
fapjack said: Some people need to be willing to give up everything to get clean, guess it depends on how much you want it. .
survival as a priority definitely makes the op8 w/d seem less pertinent.
it still sucks but u HAVE to keep moving to shelter and feed yerself,(being homeless) .just keeping the body in motion(even though you don't want to) helps the w.d.
i can't tell you how many places i had to stop in just to shit up a storm during my last few kicks.
the exhaustion helped me knock out even WITH some rls.
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zee007
Gone.



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 3,851
Loc:
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: Lynnch]
#18947170 - 10/07/13 10:08 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
sVs said: Didn't people here warn you about this shit months ago? So let me be the first to say "told you so".
Now, you should probably stop fucking around here and go work on getting more money or past your immature drug impulses. How bad, really, is your situation? Are you in peril of homelessness, are you starving? Source of income? I think your problems are mostly in your head or otherwise exaggerated. Time to wake up and deal with your problems.
Nah my situation in the OP isn't exaggerated, may have came off a little strong, I understand there are a lot more people worse off than me. I have changed a lot over the passed several months for the better. I was on the verge of moving forward, but life happened and I made mistakes. Could have used better judgement when it came to my decision making.
Quote:
Everlong said:
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zee007 said: the money i make is barley taking care of survival on top of keeping up with a poly drug use addiction.
But you don't spend money on drugs, I thought that's what we were told when a bunch of people paid for your fine. 
In all seriousness though, I barely got my shit together. In fact, I'm in the process of bundling the shit into one pile. Got the best paying job I've ever had in my life, but it's still not that great of pay and it's a shitty job. At least I can start saving to transfer to a university with my associates degree.
One step at a time.
Maybe you should start looking into finding a different job OP. It can't hurt to toss around applications while you are at McDonald's.
C'mon man you had to bring that up... At the time, no I wasn't spending my money on drugs, and only about 10% of what I make is spent on drugs. The amps I mention are just vyvanse which is completely covered by insurance. Money isn't the most of my worries, but it is one, and I clearly didn't spend every dime I had efficiently.
Quote:
Lynnch said: Of all the stupid choices you're making, living offa mcdonalds is the worst. Like, dude, you could buy a couple pounds of ground beef a loaf of bread and a sack of potatoes for what it cots to eat there twice. You'd be eating better and saving money. Probably wouldn't feel so depressed that you had to self medicate all the time too. Fuck  Seriously, just spend all of your money on good food. You'll feel better overnight.
Ehh the reason why I eat McDonald's is because it's free (I work there), instead of throwing out food waste at the end of the day I bring it home . You are definitely right though I gotta stop that shit. I swear working at McDonalds is just as bad as eating there...
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Thanks everyone for all the advice, and love  . It's about time I get back on a successful path, I didn't completely lose hope but I was getting there.
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berdinwall
<3 whooooshhh


Registered: 06/10/12
Posts: 4,276
Loc: West Virginia
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: zee007]
#18947286 - 10/07/13 10:31 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Im with ya... I got myself in a shitty situation. I was gettin bad on oxy's to where that's all I'd think about. NOW I've got a fucking 12 hour shift job thats really physically demanding and want pills to get through the shifts even more. I need to fix this shit quick...don't want to be spending all my money on pills to get through work or just enjoy my days off...need to start enjoying the simple things again like college football and beer, without pills. the river, snowboarding, camping, going out...volunteering @ the farm...eating healthy. I'm heading down a bad road and I know it. Furthermore I'm in possession offff 75 mg of oxy right now and already balls deep in a long run on em (probably 2 weeks if not more)so almost guaranteed withdrawals working 12 hour shifts is hard to face. REALLY hard to face. fuck
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Nimpo
Big Black


Registered: 05/10/12
Posts: 2,375
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Hydrocodone is my weakness. Im glad I dont have a connect for it (which is surprising because i live in the "california" of pain pills) because I would be hooked bad. Ill probably pick up the addiction when Im in my 70s and ready to die
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Sham87
mashAllah


Registered: 05/16/11
Posts: 9,816
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: Nimpo]
#18947393 - 10/07/13 10:51 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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I wish you the best Zee. Trying going sober for a week, small steps man. Work out and get a girl, bitches help out a ton!
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   ...once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest places if you look at it right...
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Lynnch
Strangerer



Registered: 04/29/09
Posts: 7,855
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: Sham87]
#18947465 - 10/07/13 11:07 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Ah man, it's hard to argue with free. But that almost makes me more worried for you, you're not exaggerating, you eat mcdonalds for practically every meal? You're basically reenacting Super Size Me, that can't be good for you. Get the hell out of that scumpit!
Just remember that it's your life, you make your decisions, you have the power to change things. If nothing else, you can at least change how you live.
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fapjack
Title



Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: Lynnch]
#18947481 - 10/07/13 11:12 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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I read somewhere that if you have regular anal sex it counter acts the negative effects of fast food... I don't remember where though exactly, but I think I read it off of a stall in a BK men's room.
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Sham87
mashAllah


Registered: 05/16/11
Posts: 9,816
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: fapjack]
#18947486 - 10/07/13 11:13 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Makes sense.
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   ...once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest places if you look at it right...
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE


Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: Sham87]
#18947491 - 10/07/13 11:14 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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TBH it's the wrong time to become a rainbow, but work hard this fall/winter and do a spring/summer live-off-the-land-esque adventure and visit the Rainbow Gatherings. Those are people who, like you, were caught in the slog of life until they found fellow travelers who had gotten lost in society.
I've never been to a Rainbow Gathering, but I think you should try to make it to one next year, let that be your goal: Save up whatever amount of money you can this winter to go live outside for free the vast majority of the late spring/summer.
Unless you're in a warm weather climate, in which case you should do all of this NOW
Drugs won't fix you, healthy food won't fix you, you need a massive paradigm shift. Maybe then you'll be inspired to seek out an actual career.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
Edited by ModestMouse (10/07/13 11:15 PM)
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something super extreme
NIGGA YOU A FUCK NIGGA!


Registered: 10/29/12
Posts: 17,397
Loc: TURNT UP!
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: fapjack] 3
#18947503 - 10/07/13 11:16 PM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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The last interesting stall-art I saw was for a very tough gang of OG niggas calling themselves the Alvord Crisps. Poor spelling, or creative advertising for a new brand of potato chips. You decide.
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,053
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 26 minutes, 17 seconds
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Crisps vs. Bolds.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Quote:
sVs said: The last interesting stall-art I saw was for a very tough gang of OG niggas calling themselves the Alvord Crisps. Poor spelling, or creative advertising for a new brand of potato chips. You decide.
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The5thElement
Smile Friends :)



Registered: 07/01/12
Posts: 4,675
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: I'm loosing touch [Re: koods]
#18947992 - 10/08/13 02:36 AM (10 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
sVs said: The last interesting stall-art I saw was for a very tough gang of OG niggas calling themselves the Alvord Crisps. Poor spelling, or creative advertising for a new brand of potato chips. You decide.
Quote:
koods said: Crisps vs. Bolds.
I LOL'D
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