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OfflineManianFHS
living in perverty
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Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,804
Last seen: 3 hours, 25 minutes
Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility
    #18901313 - 09/28/13 01:48 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

I asked my doc to test my fertility and he sent me to a semen collection facility. They asked if I would like to jerk off at home and bring it in, but I was like hell no I wanna experience those nice dimly lit rooms they put you in. I figured they would have some decent porn I could look at, maybe some different assortments of lube, who knows maybe even a TV. Well I was fucking wrong.

I get to the building which was nice so I was expecting good shit. But the carpets were all stained in the office and a lady checks me in. Shes like youre gonna do it here? I say yeah, and she gives me a key attached to a plastic ruler. She says go out the door and down the hall, first right. I go outside and its just a public bathroom. Some guy walks in ahead of me to take a piss. no lube, had to use water. there wasnt even like a tray for me to place anything on. I was balancing the cup on those handrails hoping it didnt fall.

so disillusioned.


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notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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Invisible4runner
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Registered: 07/16/10
Posts: 15,406
Loc: State of Jefferson
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: ManianFH]
    #18901329 - 09/28/13 02:01 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Hah, I did mine at home.

Felt to awkward carrying my "sample" in.

Felt so elated when I heard back, yup, zero sperms.

Free to fuck the old lady skin on skin.


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OfflineManianFHS
living in perverty
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Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,804
Last seen: 3 hours, 25 minutes
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: 4runner] * 1
    #18901349 - 09/28/13 02:17 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

haha thats funny man. Thats what im saying if im sterile that is like a free vasectomy. My girlfriend doesnt feel the same way :lol:


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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OfflineManianFHS
living in perverty
 User Gallery

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,804
Last seen: 3 hours, 25 minutes
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: 4runner]
    #18901353 - 09/28/13 02:20 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

anunnakian said:
Felt to awkward carrying my "sample" in.





yeah i put my cup back in the paper bag. when i gave it to the girl up front she takes it out and starts inspecting the cum through the cup.


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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InvisibleIndividual
Bass Addict
Male User Gallery


Registered: 12/20/06
Posts: 6,666
Loc: Reality Loophole
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: 4runner] * 6
    #18901358 - 09/28/13 02:23 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

there's an easier way to test your fertility

1. jizz in a cup
2. add some frog eggs
3. ??????????
4. profit


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THE PHILOSOPHY OF LIBERTY <---                                               



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Invisible4runner
 User Gallery

Registered: 07/16/10
Posts: 15,406
Loc: State of Jefferson
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: ManianFH]
    #18901376 - 09/28/13 02:41 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

mick said:
Quote:

anunnakian said:
Felt to awkward carrying my "sample" in.





yeah i put my cup back in the paper bag. when i gave it to the girl up front she takes it out and starts inspecting the cum through the cup.




Weird, when I told the lady what I had in my paper bag she was all, take into the bathroom and pass it through the sample window.

Maybe the chick that helped you really likes big loads and was prospecting.


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OfflineKonyap

Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: 4runner]
    #18901429 - 09/28/13 03:26 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

I keep a lot of sperm samples under my bed.


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Offlinelifeiswhatyoumake
Sake Psychic sig
Male User Gallery

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 16,857
Last seen: 5 hours, 57 minutes
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: Konyap]
    #18901447 - 09/28/13 03:43 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

I keep my sperm samples in my backpack


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Check out my new psytrance track "Sake Psychic": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xyEPGfiDrA ;


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OfflineKonyap

Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: lifeiswhatyoumake]
    #18901452 - 09/28/13 03:47 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

You hand them out at school?


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Invisiblerulesq
Bad Mogambo
Male


Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: lifeiswhatyoumake]
    #18901454 - 09/28/13 03:47 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

I've given away most of mine :datass:


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Edited by rulesq (09/28/13 06:29 AM)


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Offlinelifeiswhatyoumake
Sake Psychic sig
Male User Gallery

Registered: 09/30/11
Posts: 16,857
Last seen: 5 hours, 57 minutes
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: Konyap]
    #18901467 - 09/28/13 03:58 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

I used to.
Nowadays I walk on the streets of the city and hand em out to homeless people.


--------------------
Check out my new psytrance track "Sake Psychic": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xyEPGfiDrA ;


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InvisibleSynthe
Gatorade me, bitch!
Male


Registered: 11/10/12
Posts: 7,961
Loc: Three bags of Funyuns Flag
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: Individual]
    #18901669 - 09/28/13 06:20 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Individual said:
there's an easier way to test your fertility

1. jizz in a cup
2. add some frog eggs
3. ??????????
4. profit



:nodofunderstanding:


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InvisibleLe_Canard
The Duk Abides


Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 94,392
Loc: Earthfarm 1 Flag
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: Konyap]
    #18901757 - 09/28/13 07:16 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Illyabo said:
You hand them out at school?





They make lovely gifts for birthdays and Christmas.


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Offlinehidenseek1
Its got all the dinks.
Registered: 12/22/12
Posts: 5,423
Loc: poop
Last seen: 6 years, 11 months
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: Le_Canard]
    #18901795 - 09/28/13 07:37 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

so they dont stick some sorta gel up your bum lie in road trip?


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You can drink at 7 A.M., because the Beastie Boys fought for that right
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
pons asinorum
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
lsd and the vietnam war changed music forever


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InvisibleMentalMeltdown
Fuckin Stuckin in the Muckin
Male


Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 975
Loc: Philly Flag
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: 4runner]
    #18901802 - 09/28/13 07:39 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

anunnakian said:
Quote:

mick said:
Quote:

anunnakian said:
Felt to awkward carrying my "sample" in.





yeah i put my cup back in the paper bag. when i gave it to the girl up front she takes it out and starts inspecting the cum through the cup.




Weird, when I told the lady what I had in my paper bag she was all, take into the bathroom and pass it through the sample window.

Maybe the chick that helped you really likes big loads and was prospecting.




Maybe she brings em home and collects them.

Like this chick.



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OfflineNeuroplay
Stranger


Registered: 09/28/13
Posts: 21
Last seen: 10 years, 3 months
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: MentalMeltdown]
    #18901945 - 09/28/13 08:46 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Or you know, you could just jizz onto a microscope slide and check it that way.


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Invisiblerulesq
Bad Mogambo
Male


Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
Re: Jizzed in a cup to test my fertility [Re: Neuroplay]
    #18901965 - 09/28/13 08:54 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Nah that's way too easy.


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