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Offlinech1ck3n.s0up
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Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something * 1
    #18874314 - 09/21/13 11:41 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

http://www.theonion.com/articles/area-father-must-have-read-some-drugslang-brochure,1488/


Quote:

According to Dr. Mary Putnam-Ellis, author of Speedballs, Spliffs, And Spores: How NOT To Talk To Your Teen About Drugs parents have attempted to use drug slang for generations, despite the fact that there are no known cases of the tactic being effective.




Speedballs, Spliffs, and Spores... :lol:

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Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something
NEWS • Family • Local • Parents • Children • Drugs • ISSUE 37•15 • Apr 25, 2001
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DECATUR, GA–Rodney Dunbar, a 46-year-old civil engineer and father of two, "must have read some drug-slang pamphlet or something," his children reported Monday.

Rodney Dunbar holds a rap session with his son.

"Dad and I were watching the NBA playoffs Saturday," 14-year-old son Dylan said. "Someone missed a pass, and he goes, 'Sometimes, I get the feeling that some of these basketball players are smoking the rock.' Then, a few days later, he sits down on my bed and asks me if I'd ever been 'pressured into attending a raver party, where kids dance and take party drugs like truck driver, co-pilot, Georgia home boy, and doctor.' It's like he picked up a health textbook or something. Or maybe he found some weird talking-to-your-kids-about-drugs web site."

A discussion between Dylan and his sister Megan, 16, revealed that she had been asked similar questions.

"He asked me if any of the kids at school 'do crystal.' I just stared at him, dumbfounded," Megan said. "Then he says, 'It's also called crank. It's very dangerous.' Okay, dad."

Dr. Allen Mayhan, a local family therapist, explained Dunbar's clumsy efforts to incorporate contemporary slang into his drug talks.

"By using current slang terms, Dunbar is trying to tell his children, 'I'm "hip" or "down," and you can talk to me about anything,'" Mayhan said. "He is unaware that his stilted speaking style, belabored references, and frequent incorrect usage of terms leave his children more confused than reassured."

Mayhan discussed an April 3 incident in which Dunbar alluded to "Special K," the newly popular club drug Ketamine, during breakfast.

"As Dylan was eating a bowl of cereal, his father told him, 'Product 19 is fine, kiddo, but stay off the Special K,'" Mayhan said. "Dylan wouldn't have even known he was talking about a drug if he hadn't punctuated the reference with a raised eyebrow."

Said Dylan: "I had no idea what 'Special K' was. I had to ask White Jimmy, this guy in my history class who deals. Turns out, it's a dog anesthetic that people take. Then White Jimmy showed me his stash. Man, that guy has a lot of wild stuff."

According to Dr. Mary Putnam-Ellis, author of Speedballs, Spliffs, And Spores: How NOT To Talk To Your Teen About Drugs, parents have attempted to use drug slang for generations, despite the fact that there are no known cases of the tactic being effective.

"Recent studies indicate that knowledge of slang does not improve communication between parents and children," Putnam-Ellis said. "Instead, statistics show that hearing parents use the street names of drugs leaves teenagers feeling vaguely creeped out."

In the past, parents would use drug slang from their own generation, assuring their children that they "don't have to smoke doobies to be cool." More parents, however, are turning to current slang, picked up from articles about drugs in Time and Newsweek, investigative pieces on 60 Minutes, and movies such as Traffic, as well as from drug-slang brochures.

"Parents feel that, by exhibiting knowledge of street names, their children will see them as an informed, experienced peer who is worth listening to, rather than an out-of-touch authority figure," Putnam-Ellis said. "This tactic never works."

Despite its ineffectiveness, Dunbar said he has no plans to stop using contemporary drug slang any time soon.

"I read an article in the paper about that new drug Ecstasy and its long-term effects on the brain," Dunbar said. "I wanted to talk to the kids about it, but then I forgot what the article said they call it. Is it 'E' or 'X'? Or is it both? And I can't remember if you use 'E' as a noun or verb–do you 'do E' or do you 'get E'd up'? I'll have to make sure to get that straight."


--------------------

"Inspiration ~ Move me brightly ~ light the song with sense and color ~ hold away despair ~ more than this I will not ask ~ faced with mysteries dark and vast ~ statements just seem vain at last" --Jerry Garcia, Terrapin Station

"Officer, I'm going to remain silent, and I would like to speak with a lawyer. I'm not resisting, but I don't consent to any searches.


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OfflineDraden
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: ch1ck3n.s0up] * 1
    #18874342 - 09/21/13 11:50 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Every time I see someone posting an Onion article, I have a hard time determining whether it was posted for the comic genius, or misinterpreted as an actual news story.

Either way, gotta love a good Onion story.


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Offlinech1ck3n.s0up
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: Draden]
    #18874431 - 09/22/13 12:28 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Draden said:
Every time I see someone posting an Onion article, I have a hard time determining whether it was posted for the comic genius, or misinterpreted as an actual news story.

Either way, gotta love a good Onion story.



+5


--------------------

"Inspiration ~ Move me brightly ~ light the song with sense and color ~ hold away despair ~ more than this I will not ask ~ faced with mysteries dark and vast ~ statements just seem vain at last" --Jerry Garcia, Terrapin Station

"Officer, I'm going to remain silent, and I would like to speak with a lawyer. I'm not resisting, but I don't consent to any searches.


Edited by ch1ck3n.s0up (09/22/13 12:29 AM)


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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: ch1ck3n.s0up]
    #18874459 - 09/22/13 12:45 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

My mom asked me if I used Quaaludes after she found out I had used LSD, had to look it up :lol:


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InvisibleLiquidGlass
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: Repertoire89]
    #18874707 - 09/22/13 04:51 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

White Jimmy always has the bomb stuff!


--------------------
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I was raised a christian and was a stone-faced acid head
- Ken Kesey


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Offlinedark3st
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: LiquidGlass]
    #18874860 - 09/22/13 06:49 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Ratted on his friend lol.

My dad thought weed makes you not care for anything and shit, after I kept doing (and a few out patent programs) oh look at that... I'm still top of my class still smoking weed


--------------------
Back.. I'm going to do it...I'm getting sober from opiates ... I got weed, gabapentin, propranolol, and GHB, I have 100mg tramadol left. I can do this. I can do this.

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OfflineCan-i-bus
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: dark3st] * 1
    #18875123 - 09/22/13 09:10 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

gotta love the onion :lol:

"Then White Jimmy showed me his stash. Man, that guy has a lot of wild stuff."

:loldongs:


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OfflinePNW FunGuy
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: dark3st] * 1
    #18875204 - 09/22/13 09:42 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

dark3st said:
Ratted on his friend lol.

My dad thought weed makes you not care for anything and shit, after I kept doing (and a few out patent programs) oh look at that... I'm still top of my class still smoking weed




Lol I think it was the second time I had been caught that my father said something to me along the lines of "I don't know how much damage has already been done (he's referring to the state of my brain) but we can help you!" I feel bad now....because I just burst into laughter after that one, they are now properly educated and I even had the pleasure of giving my dad his first MJ experience when I was 17 :lol:


--------------------
"The edge, there is no honest way to explain it, because the only ones who know where it is are the ones who have gone over." Dr. HST, the true king of fun - RIP

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OfflineChuckfinely
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: PNW FunGuy]
    #18875789 - 09/22/13 12:49 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Sounds like their dad has some weird obsession with drugs.

Kinda like when someone is way over anti-whatever, it usually means they are interested in or want some of the whatever that theyre being overly opposed to.


Someone who wont shut up about how they would never fuck a Japanese girl probably secretly really wants to fuck a Japanese girl :shrug:


Seriously who thinks their 14 year old has class mates that smoke meth :facepalm:


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OfflineMrdbrewer
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: Chuckfinely]
    #18875875 - 09/22/13 01:14 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

i read that whole article in a southern accent and it made me laugh so much saying all the "hip" names of drugs in a southern voice ahahahaa


--------------------
Constantly checking my dick and nips to see if im not dying


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Offlinedokunai
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: Mrdbrewer]
    #18876155 - 09/22/13 02:26 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

A few years ago a guy in his 70s asked me "What's the real deal with medical grass?"  It didn't register right away what he was talking about.  I was picturing some kind of lawn product.

Turns out he had cancer.  I wound up loaning him my vaporizer, taught him how to use it, and gave him some weed.  He gave it back to me a week later though, and said it didn't give him much relief.


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OfflineBrakepad
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: dokunai]
    #18876289 - 09/22/13 02:55 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

shitty weed


--------------------
:sanpedro:Cactus.
:lsdabc: :kong: :chemistry: :scaryshroom: :fasted:


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Offlinedark3st
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: Brakepad]
    #18876385 - 09/22/13 03:21 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Maybe just shitty cancer?


--------------------
Back.. I'm going to do it...I'm getting sober from opiates ... I got weed, gabapentin, propranolol, and GHB, I have 100mg tramadol left. I can do this. I can do this.

OFINTQWGVGAKGCYKBUBX
free dark P. Tampanensis prints to ODD members.

no stamps atm

FREE SEEDS for ODD WCA  members ONLY

I have these seeds:
Orange, red, and yellow sweet peppers, Purple poppies, White Habanero, Yellow Thai, Bolivian rainbow peppers, milk thistle, red chilly pepper, HBWR.


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InvisibleLiquidGlass
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: dark3st]
    #18876660 - 09/22/13 04:20 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Seriously who thinks their 14 year old has class mates that smoke meth :facepalm:




I had a few classmates that smoked meth at 14 . . . crack too


--------------------
Some art I've made Glass Art Gallery

I was raised a christian and was a stone-faced acid head
- Ken Kesey


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OfflineIcepic
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: LiquidGlass]
    #18876693 - 09/22/13 04:28 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Hell I tried blow for the first time when I was 14 and was addicted to H at 16, I'd have probably done some ice at that point if it was offered to me, but I never saw ice until I was 20 and moved off the east coast.


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Offlinedark3st
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: Icepic]
    #18876730 - 09/22/13 04:36 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

East cost... does this story end with pill mills?


--------------------
Back.. I'm going to do it...I'm getting sober from opiates ... I got weed, gabapentin, propranolol, and GHB, I have 100mg tramadol left. I can do this. I can do this.

OFINTQWGVGAKGCYKBUBX
free dark P. Tampanensis prints to ODD members.

no stamps atm

FREE SEEDS for ODD WCA  members ONLY

I have these seeds:
Orange, red, and yellow sweet peppers, Purple poppies, White Habanero, Yellow Thai, Bolivian rainbow peppers, milk thistle, red chilly pepper, HBWR.


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OfflineLizard Eyes
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: Chuckfinely]
    #18877737 - 09/22/13 08:10 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Chuckfinely said:
Sounds like their dad has some weird obsession with drugs.

Kinda like when someone is way over anti-whatever, it usually means they are interested in or want some of the whatever that theyre being overly opposed to.


Someone who wont shut up about how they would never fuck a Japanese girl probably secretly really wants to fuck a Japanese girl :shrug:


Seriously who thinks their 14 year old has class mates that smoke meth :facepalm:





I agree 100%, I realized this not long after I "sold out" from being Straight Edge

Now I think drugs are pretty much the coolest things eva :goat:


--------------------

Every little thing is gonna be alright:heart:  All you need is love :love: Nobody's right, Nobody's wrong, Life's just a game it's just one epic holiday! :peace:


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InvisibleCidneyIndole
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Re: Area Father Must Have Read Some Drug-Slang Brochure Or Something [Re: dokunai]
    #18880277 - 09/23/13 11:52 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

dokunai said:
A few years ago a guy in his 70s asked me "What's the real deal with medical grass?"  It didn't register right away what he was talking about.  I was picturing some kind of lawn product.

Turns out he had cancer.  I wound up loaning him my vaporizer, taught him how to use it, and gave him some weed.  He gave it back to me a week later though, and said it didn't give him much relief.







Maybe he wasn't using it right, or enough. Doubly so, if you had one of those adjustable temp vapes, where you can set the temp way too low to work right.


--------------------
------------------------
I am me. We are You.


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