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tribesman
Never satisfied


Registered: 11/19/11
Posts: 948
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Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality.
#18872630 - 09/21/13 03:10 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I'm feeling a little more lost than usual the last few months. I've been chatting with people on a well known social media site, That I met through interest groups on that site. These are mainly Psychedelic/spirituality groups. It usually goes something like this:
Read interesting post/meme - comment on post/like - strike up a mutual curiosity and add to friends list. Then a testing the water period begins were they or myself post their own pet spiritual views/poems/paths and if my own appear popular the ego soars and inflates. If however they do not illicit the desired response self belief plummets and it can take a day or so to recover my enthusiasm and start posting again. In noticing this behaviour I've come to see the futility in seeking acknowledgment from others, and even the futility in seeking happiness, or feeling unimportant. This logically leads me to the conclusion that some kind of passive median may ultimately save me much emotional oscillation. As I say, I'm lost, I need help, and I can't find the A team.
-------------------- " No permanence is ours; we are a wave That flows to fit whatever form it finds: Through night or day, cathedral or the cave We pass forever, craving form that binds." ~ Hermann Hesse, The Glass Bead Game
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Psilopsychosis



Registered: 07/06/13
Posts: 717
Loc:
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18872879 - 09/21/13 04:24 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Well man, idk f I am the one to be giving advice because I deleted facebook in 2011 because it turning me into a narcissist whose happiness was swayed by other's opinions. Getting rid of it took a giant weight off of my chest. The people who contacted me were friends. I wasn't a recluse I still hung out with people and had fun. Then this last year however went by and I lost contact with all but a handful of friends, I also stopped burning and drank a lot less so I wasn't meet as much new people. So I am not going to give you any advice as to if you should be on that social network or not... that is not my place.
But if you want to share nay of your views/poems/paths I would read them and tell you what I think.
I think though, you need to find happiness inside yourself first and foremost.
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Deviate
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18872929 - 09/21/13 04:34 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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This is resulting because you are looking for happineess and validation outside. You will never find it there.
The mind MUST be turned inward. When you learn to love God above all else, that passivity you seek results automatically. God is present always, so what is there to be gained or lost?
Study the laws of the Most High. Pursue righteosness and virture while avoiding vice. Pray and meditate. Basically, if you seek God, you will find Him. All that is required is sincerity and perseverence.
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Psilopsychosis]
#18874638 - 09/22/13 03:41 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I do feel like it's having an unhealthy impact on me, though I also feel that I should be able to use the site without it doing so. Amongst my friends on there are family, people I know, and people I've never met, but with whom I chat about religion, spirituality, art, and philosophy. I have also started Reading a lot more Buddhist literature recently, like The Inner Kalacakratantra, and The Way of the Bodhisattva. Reading these pushes me to act more selfless, and to try and help people where I can, but in doing so the ego inflates and Self importance increases. It's paradoxical to gain self importance when trying to live selflessly.
I have also started relating my attitude to that of the Peacock, and it's symbolism in buddhism, though this attitude if being able to exist amongst poisonous attitudes And others attachment and suffering also contributes to my ego inflation.
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tribesman
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Registered: 11/19/11
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Deviate]
#18874641 - 09/22/13 03:44 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Deviate said: This is resulting because you are looking for happineess and validation outside. You will never find it there.
The mind MUST be turned inward. When you learn to love God above all else, that passivity you seek results automatically. God is present always, so what is there to be gained or lost?
Study the laws of the Most High. Pursue righteosness and virture while avoiding vice. Pray and meditate. Basically, if you seek God, you will find Him. All that is required is sincerity and perseverence.
I agree with some if what you say, but in cultivating inner virtue, and then sharing and applying it outwardly to benefit others I fall prey to hubris and any good is undone.
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Psilopsychosis



Registered: 07/06/13
Posts: 717
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18876325 - 09/22/13 03:06 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
tribesman said: I do feel like it's having an unhealthy impact on me, though I also feel that I should be able to use the site without it doing so. Amongst my friends on there are family, people I know, and people I've never met, but with whom I chat about religion, spirituality, art, and philosophy. I have also started Reading a lot more Buddhist literature recently, like The Inner Kalacakratantra, and The Way of the Bodhisattva. Reading these pushes me to act more selfless, and to try and help people where I can, but in doing so the ego inflates and Self importance increases. It's paradoxical to gain self importance when trying to live selflessly.
I have also started relating my attitude to that of the Peacock, and it's symbolism in buddhism, though this attitude if being able to exist amongst poisonous attitudes And others attachment and suffering also contributes to my ego inflation.
When is helping someone ever a bad thing? I think you would be hard pressed to find someone who doesn't feel good after doing something good. If you are worried about your ego going to your head then maybe next time you do something nice for someone or you do a good deed in general don't tell anyone about it and don't ask for thanks. Who cares what everyone else thinks only that you know you did something cool.
I don't really know much about Buddhism to be honest, Do you follow the 5th precept(abstaining from drugs and alcohol)? What do you think about the Buddhist view that the self is an illusion? I find that last idea very hard to grasp.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18876715 - 09/22/13 04:34 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
tribesman said: I'm feeling a little more lost than usual the last few months. I've been chatting with people on a well known social media site, That I met through interest groups on that site. These are mainly Psychedelic/spirituality groups. It usually goes something like this:
Read interesting post/meme - comment on post/like - strike up a mutual curiosity and add to friends list. Then a testing the water period begins were they or myself post their own pet spiritual views/poems/paths and if my own appear popular the ego soars and inflates. If however they do not illicit the desired response self belief plummets and it can take a day or so to recover my enthusiasm and start posting again. In noticing this behaviour I've come to see the futility in seeking acknowledgment from others, and even the futility in seeking happiness, or feeling unimportant. This logically leads me to the conclusion that some kind of passive median may ultimately save me much emotional oscillation. As I say, I'm lost, I need help, and I can't find the A team. 
They say in the modern world people are talking more and feel more alienated and lonely than ever. You are your own A team I guess. I find dogs fill the void very well but you have to work with them and really engage.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
Posts: 948
Loc: Down by the river
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Psilopsychosis]
#18878631 - 09/22/13 11:48 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I suppose helping someone perpetuate an unhealthy habit, or lifestyle could be a bad thing, even if they wanted to continue.
As for doing good deeds anonymously; it's not a problem others knowing, it's me placing Myself on a pedestal. This is in relation to the idea that self is an illusion, but more accurately that looking up to ones self and looking down on ones self are both unhelpful and deceptive perspectives.
I smoke tobacco, this is my one remaining vice, and I am going to quit soon. I don't get anything from it that I am conscious of. My reduction in drugs and alcohol (I haven't really drank for years anyway), has nothing to do with my reading on buddhism.
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Icelander]
#18878672 - 09/23/13 12:03 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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We have two dogs, I try to take them for a run twice a day and on a longer walk at weekends. It gets me out of the house, and out From under the feet of my girlfriend. One is an eleven year old Collie/spaniel cross (male), and the other is a one year old Staffordshire Bull terrier (bitch). the younger one is always Jostling the elder, and I'm concerned he take a bad knock and Get injured. She has already clocked him in the head with a thick Branch as she's ran past.
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Icelander
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Posts: 95,368
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18879526 - 09/23/13 07:58 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Well that's something but you can go a lot further with dogs than just some exercise. I became a semi professional dog trainer some years back and the things I've learned since then have made me value my relationship to dogs more than my relationships with humans. Of course dogs aren't nearly so lame so that would make sense.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
Posts: 948
Loc: Down by the river
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Icelander]
#18879646 - 09/23/13 08:52 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I don't want to upset the older dog too much, he's quite well behaved anyway, he's just not very clever around roads. Do you think you can teach an old dog new tricks? 
The younger one definitely needs training though she is good at listening, she will always come back to me before the elder when called. She's just very excitable.
What do mean by " more than exercise "?
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Icelander
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18879737 - 09/23/13 09:22 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Can you teach an old human new tricks?
I mean real bonding through serious training and also letting them be a real part of your daily life. Not just that hour in the morning and afternoon and a pat on the head in between. But relating to them by learning their customs and how they communicate with body language etc. Very few people realize that their dogs are constantly communicating their desires to them.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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tribesman
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Registered: 11/19/11
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Icelander]
#18879784 - 09/23/13 09:31 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I do have that with the older one, I notice just winking to him is a good way to reassure him when he is looking anxious or unsettled. I'm not sure the younger one understands fully yet, but to a certain degree she does. I have the same body language Conversations with my cats, and I do understand even if only in a simple way, the effectiveness of body language.
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Icelander
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18879823 - 09/23/13 09:42 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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You might enjoy this then. It's an awesome and simple book (but profound) on what dogs are saying to us and other dogs with body language.
http://www.amazon.com/On-Talking-Terms-With-Dogs/dp/1929242360
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
Posts: 948
Loc: Down by the river
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Icelander]
#18879974 - 09/23/13 10:24 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I'll try and order if soon, and see if it helps me.
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
Posts: 948
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Icelander]
#18880934 - 09/23/13 02:53 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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On closer inspection it really does look like a cool book, hopefully I can get some help from it. It's easy to be lazy and complacent with animals, when with a sufficient level of engagement and commitment progress can be made.
-------------------- " No permanence is ours; we are a wave That flows to fit whatever form it finds: Through night or day, cathedral or the cave We pass forever, craving form that binds." ~ Hermann Hesse, The Glass Bead Game
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Icelander
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18880942 - 09/23/13 02:56 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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totally true. IMO and experience dogs are complex emotional creatures and if treated right have amazing natures.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
Posts: 948
Loc: Down by the river
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Icelander]
#18881334 - 09/23/13 04:48 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I can't help but relate the ideas you mention to people.
An awareness, or hyper acuity to body language, and the attitude we have towards animals as lacking our own attachment to self and the need for the acknowledgement we seek from other humans.
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Icelander
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: tribesman]
#18881447 - 09/23/13 05:21 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Humans and dogs are quite similar ime. With dogs being overall emotionally healthier due to likely their lack of continual neurotic thinking.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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tribesman
Never satisfied



Registered: 11/19/11
Posts: 948
Loc: Down by the river
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Re: Sumptuously numb: A queztion of balance vs Neutrality. [Re: Icelander]
#18882780 - 09/23/13 10:36 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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you defo got us sussed.
-------------------- " No permanence is ours; we are a wave That flows to fit whatever form it finds: Through night or day, cathedral or the cave We pass forever, craving form that binds." ~ Hermann Hesse, The Glass Bead Game
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