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Invisiblevinsue
Grand Old Fart
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Registered: 02/17/04
Posts: 17,953
Loc: The Garden State(NJ) Flag
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: Magicman69]
    #18844029 - 09/15/13 10:38 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Magicman69 said:
I'm just saying that the quality of life decreases extremely and it is very sad to watch. Sometimes sooner is better.




This is often true. I watched life fade from my father in laws' eyes, 'twas time to go...



:heart: . . . :peace:


--------------------

"All mushrooms are edible; but some only once." Croatian proverb. BTW ...
  Have You Rated Ythans Mom Yet ?? ... :taser:  ... HERE'S HOW ... (be nice) .  :mod: ... :peace:


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Offlinest1llnox
dx'd PTSD/ADHD--please don't ask
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Registered: 11/27/12
Posts: 7,312
Loc: 913 KANSAS CITY 816 Flag
Last seen: 5 years, 1 month
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: Magicman69]
    #18844895 - 09/15/13 02:56 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

omegafaust said:
That's probably a good idea.  Spend every second you can spare with him.  maybe take a recorder to record his stories when you get the chance. 

And try not to relapse man.  think about how your grandpa would feel if he knew or had to see you like that.




I will and thanks.I'll think of that when the gelcaps beckon. The recorder is a GREAT idea... I just hope I get the chance.

My dad isn't really wanting to take me to the hopsital so around 5pm, in one hour, I'm really gonna be insistent. I called into work because I couldn't sleep and was in no shape to work (plus I need to spend the time with Grandpa instead).

Quote:

Magicman69 said:
Nox sorry to hear at your grandpa. My only grandparent still alive is a 90 year old grandfather with dementia. He hardly remembers us anymore and refuses to leave his nursing home because he thinks my Dad is trying to kill him :laugh2:. I'm just saying that the quality of life decreases extremely and it is very sad to watch. Sometimes sooner is better.





That is what really got me the other day was seeing him confused and how frustrated he was trying to think of what he wanted to say. I couldn't help but break into tears on my way out of the room.


He's on morphine now which scares the shit out of me, but oddly I'm more comforted that he is in less pain and discomfort.



Scratch that, my dad is taking me now but only for 5 minutes. I guess he's been having so many visitors, as I can attest to, that the doctors are actually worried so it would be selfish to plant myself there.

I warned my dad I still want to spend some period of hours in the next few days to make sure I'm there for him if I can be.


This has been really painful. I hope he's okay but I'm glad he's more comfortable and I hope he gets' again, a second wind for at least a few more weeks of good life.


Thanks all of you. I love this community more than you know.


--------------------
Back, bitches.
st1lln0x: so i'm on weed, temazepam, adderall, dexedrine, dxm, dph, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, tryptophan, GABA, and kratom
Cavemen_savemen: st1lln0x, do you feel like a robot yet?
st1lln0x: I feel like a fucking Gundam
Click to friend me on Steam for Counter-Strike
:crankey: IS LIFE SKULLFUCKING YOU!? HAVE SOME FREE MORALE! :awesomenod:
Click if you want to feel you alone can do it! Click if you want to feel confident and beastly! Click if you want courage to let go and move on! And click the message if you need someone to talk to -- I'll understand, even if we "hate" each other on here :hug: :sun:


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InvisibleVivaLaMushie
RIP LS :(
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Registered: 07/23/12
Posts: 15,711
Loc: Switzerland Flag
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox]
    #18845100 - 09/15/13 03:43 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Try not to be so sad, st1ll. This is the process of life.

*hugs*


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InvisibleSham87
mashAllah
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Registered: 05/16/11
Posts: 9,819
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: VivaLaMushie]
    #18845118 - 09/15/13 03:47 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Good vibes nox, hope your granpappy pulls through.


--------------------
:mushroom2::sun::crazy2::leaf:




...once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest places if you look at it right...



:feelsgoatman:


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OfflineLed Zeppelin
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Registered: 05/17/10
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox] * 1
    #18845146 - 09/15/13 03:53 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

im gonna sound like an asshole here but dude you are such a fucking attention whore. I cant take it. you make me want to eat a baby.

oh yeah great idea bro lets just get on benzos so I wont drink myself to death with cough syrup  :facepalm3:


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Invisiblethizzlemaniac
राम राम
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Registered: 03/27/12
Posts: 2,250
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox]
    #18845148 - 09/15/13 03:53 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

My grandfather was a Higgins...I'm not going to read all of that right now St1llnox, but best wishes and positive vibes to everyone.  I'll read when I get off work bud. :peace:

edit: Do you know if you're related to Pinky Higgins of Boston Redsox fame?  He coached Ted Williams and played in the majors himself.  If you're in Kansas (or Kansas City, MO) it's close to my home and the Higgins family I know of.  Maybe we are somewhat related :shrug:


--------------------
Hi how are you? How high are you?



:aum:


Edited by thizzlemaniac (09/15/13 03:55 PM)


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Offlinest1llnox
dx'd PTSD/ADHD--please don't ask
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Registered: 11/27/12
Posts: 7,312
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: thizzlemaniac]
    #18845160 - 09/15/13 03:56 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Thanks again both of you.

He was sitting up, pretty well-awake, and eating some good-smelling turkey and mashed potatoes and gravy (albeit struggling).

His nurse assured me they're keeping his pain at bay first and foremost, but that it's not necessarily meaning he's not necessarily headed for hospice type care which is promising.



He loves Ireland so I'm going to paint an irish landscape and bring it to him tomorrow. It will help make his room more cheerful and conducive to him recovering, perhaps.

Quote:

thizzlemaniac said:
My grandfather was a Higgins...I'm not going to read all of that right now St1llnox, but best wishes and positive vibes to everyone.  I'll read when I get off work bud. :peace:




No need to read it... just send some good vibes my Higgins' way. Higgins is from O'Higgins which supposedly can be interpreted historically accurate as meaning "of vikings". Explains how tough my gramps is :wink:

Thanks for your kind words and well wishes. You're one of my favorite posters, Thizzle.


--------------------
Back, bitches.
st1lln0x: so i'm on weed, temazepam, adderall, dexedrine, dxm, dph, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, tryptophan, GABA, and kratom
Cavemen_savemen: st1lln0x, do you feel like a robot yet?
st1lln0x: I feel like a fucking Gundam
Click to friend me on Steam for Counter-Strike
:crankey: IS LIFE SKULLFUCKING YOU!? HAVE SOME FREE MORALE! :awesomenod:
Click if you want to feel you alone can do it! Click if you want to feel confident and beastly! Click if you want courage to let go and move on! And click the message if you need someone to talk to -- I'll understand, even if we "hate" each other on here :hug: :sun:


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Invisiblethizzlemaniac
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Registered: 03/27/12
Posts: 2,250
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox]
    #18845188 - 09/15/13 04:05 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Yea my grandpa before he died told us about O'Higgins from Ireland, which was one of the last times I saw him!  He was the best man I ever knew in my life as far as kindness and respectability.  I didn't know about the viking thing tho.  My grandpa smoked cigs from a VERY young age you wouldn't believe me if I told you but he had it hard because of it.  St1ll you get a lot of shit around here but you're a good guy and one of my favs as well.  PM me I'd love to help you thru this :peace:  Gotta go to work though :sad: I'll be in touch either way bud.

Tell me what you know about your background it would be crazy to see we are related in some way :eek:


--------------------
Hi how are you? How high are you?



:aum:


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InvisibleSophistic Radiance
Free sVs!
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Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox]
    #18845209 - 09/15/13 04:12 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

st1ll, remember when I was having some trouble controlling my intake? It's been almost six weeks now since that time I went overboard, and I haven't been tempted to do so again since.

During that time, my uncle died (hardly with any warning) of fourth-stage prostate and spinal cancer.

I didn't relapse. You shouldn't either.

If anything you should have more motivation to watch after your well-being than you did before. One of life's few certainties is that death catches up to us all someday, there is no need to TP his garage before then. Instead you should hungrily pursue the opportunities your grandfather fought to preserve and create for you. That is the only true way to send him good vibes. The rest is hot air.

This is not the excuse you're looking for.



You have a choice between taking on life on your feet or crawling away from it on your belly it like a pathetic worm.


Edited by Sophistic Radiance (09/15/13 04:38 PM)


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OfflineSprewellSleeve
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #18845258 - 09/15/13 04:32 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Try exercising and having a healthy diet. Start slowly if you have to.

Good vibes to you and your grandfather, nox. I'm hoping for the best, whatever that may be.


--------------------


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Offlinest1llnox
dx'd PTSD/ADHD--please don't ask
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Registered: 11/27/12
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: thizzlemaniac]
    #18845279 - 09/15/13 04:40 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

BlindSophist said:
st1ll, remember when I was having some trouble controlling my intake? It's been almost six weeks now since that time I went overboard, and I haven't been tempted to do so again since.

During that time, my uncle died (hardly with any warning) of fourth-stage prostate and spinal cancer.

I did not relapse. You shouldn't either. If anything you should have more motivation to watch after your well-being than you did before. There is no excuse. Don't be a pussy. :crankynoweed:




Well motherfucking said. I'm proud of you and you know what? If something happens to my grandpa, I'm not going to let that be a relapse risk... I'm going to let that be an opportunity to honor his memory by being good, to MYSELF and TO MY FAMILY :thumbup:

I will honor him, and I will make it past December without DXM.

Hater's gonna hate but fuck em... just shows that at least I'm not a typical, bland, cookie-cutter person.

Quote:

thizzlemaniac said:
Yea my grandpa before he died told us about O'Higgins from Ireland, which was one of the last times I saw him!  He was the best man I ever knew in my life as far as kindness and respectability.  I didn't know about the viking thing tho.  My grandpa smoked cigs from a VERY young age you wouldn't believe me if I told you but he had it hard because of it.  St1ll you get a lot of shit around here but you're a good guy and one of my favs as well.  PM me I'd love to help you thru this :peace:  Gotta go to work though :sad: I'll be in touch either way bud.

Tell me what you know about your background it would be crazy to see we are related in some way :eek:




That must have been a treat hearing that from your Grandpa. The elderly have so much to share... it saddens me to see how so many are content to merely warehouse them. I am not sure on the Viking thing but I do recall having googled it to at least vaguely establish that it indeed has truth or at least a historical link.

That's unfortunate he was a smoker. As I confessed on here, I'm back in the cigs after months of no smoking following a you-know-what-XM revelation. I already know why I can't so no need for psyches... but especially after knowing your grandpa had it hard due to smoking, I'm even more sure that the first thing when I see my GP about this sleep/anxiety will be to get on the patch and get some gum. I can beat this shit too.

I do get a lot of shit, but it means the world to me that I am liked and welcome on here (particularly by the best shroomerites, such as yourself). I finally ignored a guy who's been plaguing the DXM megathread but you'd scarecely believe the shit that came out of his keyboard here, http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/18568006/fpart/29 ; .  And did he have to do this while I'm a little down?

I will PM you and also look more into my lineage... I dare say we're certainly related, albeit with a high degree of separation.

Do you happen to have a lot of relatives in Nebraska, by chance?

Kink Klips also PMed me and has been wonderfully supportive so I wanted to acknowledge him for being such a great person. :thumbup:




My grandpa LOVES Ireland and he's gonna love the painting I'm going to make him. Better do it soon just in case though.


Thanks all of you.


--------------------
Back, bitches.
st1lln0x: so i'm on weed, temazepam, adderall, dexedrine, dxm, dph, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, tryptophan, GABA, and kratom
Cavemen_savemen: st1lln0x, do you feel like a robot yet?
st1lln0x: I feel like a fucking Gundam
Click to friend me on Steam for Counter-Strike
:crankey: IS LIFE SKULLFUCKING YOU!? HAVE SOME FREE MORALE! :awesomenod:
Click if you want to feel you alone can do it! Click if you want to feel confident and beastly! Click if you want courage to let go and move on! And click the message if you need someone to talk to -- I'll understand, even if we "hate" each other on here :hug: :sun:


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InvisibleSophistic Radiance
Free sVs!
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Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #18845321 - 09/15/13 04:55 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

st1llnox said:
Quote:

BlindSophist said:
st1ll, remember when I was having some trouble controlling my intake? It's been almost six weeks now since that time I went overboard, and I haven't been tempted to do so again since.

During that time, my uncle died (hardly with any warning) of fourth-stage prostate and spinal cancer.

I didn't relapse. You shouldn't either.

If anything you should have more motivation to watch after your well-being than you did before. One of life's few certainties is that death catches up to us all someday, there is no need to TP his garage before then. Instead you should hungrily pursue the opportunities your grandfather fought to preserve and create for you. That is the only true way to send him good vibes. The rest is hot air.

This is not the excuse you're looking for.



You have a choice between taking on life on your feet or crawling away from it on your belly it like a pathetic worm.



Well motherfucking said. I'm proud of you and you know what? If something happens to my grandpa, I'm not going to let that be a relapse risk... I'm going to let that be an opportunity to honor his memory by being good, to MYSELF and TO MY FAMILY :thumbup:

I will honor him, and I will make it past December without DXM.

Hater's gonna hate but fuck em... just shows that at least I'm not a typical, bland, cookie-cutter person.




What shows that you're not a typical, bland, cookie-cutter person? That you can go for three months without chugging cough syrup after noticing that it was severely impairing your ability to function in life? I'm sorry, but addiction is unique and interesting the same way a bloody car wreck in the middle of the freeway tends to be eye-catching.

What is the point of this date? What does it prove that you can go for three months without temporarily nullifying your reality? What good will it do if you get back on DXM right before you go back to school?

Please mind you that these are rhetorical questions, not literal requests for more of your usual delusional excuses.


--------------------
Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.



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Offlinest1llnox
dx'd PTSD/ADHD--please don't ask
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Registered: 11/27/12
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #18845340 - 09/15/13 05:00 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

BlindSophist said:
Quote:

st1llnox said:
Quote:

BlindSophist said:
st1ll, remember when I was having some trouble controlling my intake? It's been almost six weeks now since that time I went overboard, and I haven't been tempted to do so again since.

During that time, my uncle died (hardly with any warning) of fourth-stage prostate and spinal cancer.

I didn't relapse. You shouldn't either.

If anything you should have more motivation to watch after your well-being than you did before. One of life's few certainties is that death catches up to us all someday, there is no need to TP his garage before then. Instead you should hungrily pursue the opportunities your grandfather fought to preserve and create for you. That is the only true way to send him good vibes. The rest is hot air.

This is not the excuse you're looking for.



You have a choice between taking on life on your feet or crawling away from it on your belly it like a pathetic worm.



Well motherfucking said. I'm proud of you and you know what? If something happens to my grandpa, I'm not going to let that be a relapse risk... I'm going to let that be an opportunity to honor his memory by being good, to MYSELF and TO MY FAMILY :thumbup:

I will honor him, and I will make it past December without DXM.

Hater's gonna hate but fuck em... just shows that at least I'm not a typical, bland, cookie-cutter person.




What shows that you're not a typical, bland, cookie-cutter person? That you can go for three months without chugging cough syrup after noticing that it was severely impairing your ability to function in life? I'm sorry, but addiction is unique and interesting the same way a bloody car wreck in the middle of the freeway tends to be eye-catching.

What is the point of this date? What does it prove that you can go for three months without temporarily nullifying your reality? What good will it do if you get back on DXM right before you go back to school?

Please mind you that these are rhetorical questions, not literal requests for more of your usual delusional excuses.




I'll take you off ignore in about 6 months on the off chance there's anything you have to say worth hearing.


Take a look at what this thread is about, and then ask yourself why the fuck you would choose that time, that thread to say potentially hurtful (if I held you in any significant regard, which if I did, I do no longer) things and give what is actually not at all useful input.

Not at all useful... this was just you indulging in being an asshole to someone on the internet.





Anyway, I'm "proud" right now on my mood here because my grandpa is TOUCH. :thumbup:


--------------------
Back, bitches.
st1lln0x: so i'm on weed, temazepam, adderall, dexedrine, dxm, dph, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, tryptophan, GABA, and kratom
Cavemen_savemen: st1lln0x, do you feel like a robot yet?
st1lln0x: I feel like a fucking Gundam
Click to friend me on Steam for Counter-Strike
:crankey: IS LIFE SKULLFUCKING YOU!? HAVE SOME FREE MORALE! :awesomenod:
Click if you want to feel you alone can do it! Click if you want to feel confident and beastly! Click if you want courage to let go and move on! And click the message if you need someone to talk to -- I'll understand, even if we "hate" each other on here :hug: :sun:


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InvisibleSophistic Radiance
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Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox]
    #18845351 - 09/15/13 05:03 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Yeah, way more indulgent than haughtily telling off somebody you just put on ignore. :shake:


--------------------
Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.



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InvisibleShroomismM
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox]
    #18845596 - 09/15/13 06:02 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Yeah.. so just auto ignore anyone that offers you good advice because it doesn't jibe well with your ego. That's productive :rolleyes:

I wish your grandpa well. But man, life is full of struggles. People die, and people suffer. You need to learn sooner or later, that not everything is peaches and rainbows. And death is no excuse to be destructive. Death is a natural part of the cycle of life.

If you don't want to invite so much criticism, then don't act so full of it, because you literally beg for it.
You have this symptom where everyone who disagrees with you must be wrong or insane. That's bad juju. And ignoring people isn't going to make it easier. Especially cool people.


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Offlinempd
Lammen Gorthaur
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: Shroomism]
    #18845701 - 09/15/13 06:21 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Sorry to hear of your misfortune.  We can still have hope and I hope you will be okay.


--------------------
There is no truer calling for mankind than that of true conservatism.


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Offlinest1llnox
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: mpd]
    #18845800 - 09/15/13 06:45 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Shroomism said:
Yeah.. so just auto ignore anyone that offers you good advice because it doesn't jibe well with your ego. That's productive :rolleyes:

I wish your grandpa well. But man, life is full of struggles. People die, and people suffer. You need to learn sooner or later, that not everything is peaches and rainbows. And death is no excuse to be destructive. Death is a natural part of the cycle of life.

If you don't want to invite so much criticism, then don't act so full of it, because you literally beg for it.
You have this symptom where everyone who disagrees with you must be wrong or insane. That's bad juju. And ignoring people isn't going to make it easier. Especially cool people.




That's why I'm just temporarily ignoring her while I'm under so much other stress.

While my temper may have clouded there (probably did, in fact), she offered nothing I hadn't heard before or at least nothing good and workable. While what you're saying about me isn't within the scope of your aforementioned peaches and rainbows, it is good criticism and was delivered much more tactfully. I appreciate your input, Shroomism.

At a certain point, I don't care about inviting criticism but especially with my compensatory ego (read: "full of it"-ness) and such, I really do need to self-monitor and work on being a better member of this community, which you can rest assured I'll be doing.

Again, thanks for your input. :thumbup:

Quote:

mpd said:
Sorry to hear of your misfortune.  We can still have hope and I hope you will be okay.




Thanks mpd. This reminds me I forgot to mention you and timethyl (sp?) in my favorite shroomerites thread, but you're certainly in that category and I appreciate you.

I will continue to keep my hopes up but with respect to the sometimes cruel but certainly natural progression of life.


--------------------
Back, bitches.
st1lln0x: so i'm on weed, temazepam, adderall, dexedrine, dxm, dph, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, tryptophan, GABA, and kratom
Cavemen_savemen: st1lln0x, do you feel like a robot yet?
st1lln0x: I feel like a fucking Gundam
Click to friend me on Steam for Counter-Strike
:crankey: IS LIFE SKULLFUCKING YOU!? HAVE SOME FREE MORALE! :awesomenod:
Click if you want to feel you alone can do it! Click if you want to feel confident and beastly! Click if you want courage to let go and move on! And click the message if you need someone to talk to -- I'll understand, even if we "hate" each other on here :hug: :sun:


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Offlinempd
Lammen Gorthaur
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: st1llnox]
    #18845885 - 09/15/13 07:08 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Tmethyl and his wife Boo-Boo Kittyfuck are the real deal.  Shirt off their backs on good growing advice.  I can think of a lot of worse things than being his apprentice for a few months and squeeze him dry.  LOL!


--------------------
There is no truer calling for mankind than that of true conservatism.


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Invisiblethe mad machinest
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also, this is a relapse risk. [Re: mpd]
    #18847297 - 09/16/13 12:44 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

good vibes being sent twards yer whole family bro!!

also, dood, seriously man, if its a relapse risk, use your resources!! there are MANY people here who care about you,I'm sure you have many in IRL who can help support you along with us to keep you from relapse man. best of luck and :pm: if ya ever need a friend:peace::sun:


--------------------
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Offlinest1llnox
dx'd PTSD/ADHD--please don't ask
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Registered: 11/27/12
Posts: 7,312
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Re: Please send my Grandfather good vibes and prayers (Eugine Higgins). Also [Re: the mad machinest]
    #18847309 - 09/16/13 12:47 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

the mad machinest said:
good vibes being sent twards yer whole family bro!!

also, dood, seriously man, if its a relapse risk, use your resources!! there are MANY people here who care about you,I'm sure you have many in IRL who can help support you along with us to keep you from relapse man. best of luck and :pm: if ya ever need a friend:peace::sun:




Thank you, brother. This DXM thing is more about proving to myself I can do it than proving I can do it because I need to, but that's what an addict would say and I was certainly addicted earlier this summer.

I'm much more concerned about my Grandpa and relatives right now though, especially my Mom (it's her Dad), and your vibes are deeply appreciated my friend.


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