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stpedro75
Mr. Dr. Cpt. Sgnt.


Registered: 12/20/12
Posts: 163
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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I'm going to hell
#18820494 - 09/09/13 08:01 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Please. if you don't believe in God just don't post. I don't need your militant atheist input. I used to be really creative. than I started doing a bunch of shrooms. I became very arrogant because they made me feel so smart and like I was such a great artist. I had one trip where I found God but that's a whole other story. I started having some anxiety issues and started taking Prozac. than like an idiot I mixed it with shrooms and my whole life came crashing down. I now always feel like i'm dreaming. I have little emotion, no creativity. a shell of my former self. what use am I to God now? why should he save me, look what I've done to myself
-------------------- hopelessness is a lie
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Kinko
Stranger



Registered: 01/07/11
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18820516 - 09/09/13 08:05 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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lol i honestly wonder how people think so highly of themselves i just dont understand why you think GOD would want to use you LOLOL your not that important bro.
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stpedro75
Mr. Dr. Cpt. Sgnt.


Registered: 12/20/12
Posts: 163
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: Kinko]
#18820549 - 09/09/13 08:11 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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like I said please just leave me alone. He has a use for you and everybody if you must know my beliefs. I'm no more important than anyone. were all important to the divine plan. but go away i'm in distress and I don't care about people like you's opinion right now. this is the spirituality section so if your not spiritual than just go somewhere else
-------------------- hopelessness is a lie
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teknix
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Registered: 09/16/08
Posts: 11,953
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18820582 - 09/09/13 08:17 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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What use were you to god before?
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teknix
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Registered: 09/16/08
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: teknix]
#18820600 - 09/09/13 08:20 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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If a miracle happened, and all of a sudden you were fixed, what's the first thing you would notice that would be different when you woke up? What would change and let you know the miracle happened?
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stpedro75
Mr. Dr. Cpt. Sgnt.


Registered: 12/20/12
Posts: 163
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: teknix]
#18820637 - 09/09/13 08:26 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I was smart, creative, People liked bein around me I was well spoken I had a lot of potential. now I'm none of those things. Having potential to reach is to be of use to God.
-------------------- hopelessness is a lie
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stpedro75
Mr. Dr. Cpt. Sgnt.


Registered: 12/20/12
Posts: 163
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: teknix]
#18820645 - 09/09/13 08:27 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I would write songs like I used to. I would hear my favorite songs and love them. The dreamy feeling would be gone. the anxiety would be gone.
-------------------- hopelessness is a lie
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Psilopsychosis



Registered: 07/06/13
Posts: 717
Loc:
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18820699 - 09/09/13 08:39 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Don't lose hope man, there is always hope. It will take time but you can rewire your brain.
I can assume you are Christian right? Maybe you should talk to a priest.
Another thing i think you should do that will be an unpopular viewpoint around here is to check yourself into a psych ward in a hospital.I was always there as an involuntary patient but if you check yourself in and you aren't a danger to yourself or others you can leave at any time. If you ask for it a priest will visit you. I was raised Catholic so I was raised to believe that there is no sin that you can't confess to God that he won't forgive you.
I have since fallen away from the Catholic faith but there is some real spiritual power in confession. Sometimes I go into the wilderness (or as close to wilderness as can find And confess my sins and shortcomings to God and the spirits.
My psychosis was all positive symptoms but people like my friend Dan can have psychosis with only negative symptoms. Dan actually has made a great recovery and is contemplating becoming a monk after he finishes his philosophy degree.
Quote:
I now always feel like I'm dreaming. I have little emotion, no creativity. a shell of my former self.
I think a really bad trip triggered a drug induced psychosis. You will be alright man. Just get some help.
I also believe that God has a use for everyone. We are all here for an important reason. . edit bad grammar
Edited by Psilopsychosis (09/09/13 08:42 PM)
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teknix
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Registered: 09/16/08
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18820770 - 09/09/13 08:50 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
stpedro75 said: I would write songs like I used to. I would hear my favorite songs and love them. The dreamy feeling would be gone. the anxiety would be gone.
Then wake up and do it, write a song.
Want to post some of your previous work and something new? (for an independent perspective?)
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SomeGuyX
The Ganja Mahn



Registered: 11/04/12
Posts: 1,132
Last seen: 10 months, 27 days
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: teknix]
#18820784 - 09/09/13 08:53 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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You aren't going to hell. Maybe this is all a part of the plan? To pull yourself back together, wake up again.
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stpedro75
Mr. Dr. Cpt. Sgnt.


Registered: 12/20/12
Posts: 163
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: teknix]
#18820829 - 09/09/13 09:01 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I would like that. Ill post a song I've made for you to listen to
-------------------- hopelessness is a lie
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teknix
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Registered: 09/16/08
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18820832 - 09/09/13 09:02 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Cool thanks.
Maybe it could be that you're having a writers block, and that's what making you anxious.
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g00ru
lit pants tit licker



Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 21,088
Loc: georgia, us
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18820837 - 09/09/13 09:03 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
stpedro75 said: Please. if you don't believe in God just don't post. I don't need your militant atheist input. I used to be really creative. than I started doing a bunch of shrooms. I became very arrogant because they made me feel so smart and like I was such a great artist. I had one trip where I found God but that's a whole other story. I started having some anxiety issues and started taking Prozac. than like an idiot I mixed it with shrooms and my whole life came crashing down. I now always feel like i'm dreaming. I have little emotion, no creativity. a shell of my former self. what use am I to God now? why should he save me, look what I've done to myself
i don't think god is going to judge you negatively in the way you are thinking. just take it one step at a time, get your life back together, you'll see god was carrying you all along. sounds cliche but, its true.
-------------------- check out my music! drowse in prison and your waking will be but loss
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moi
Stranger


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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18821110 - 09/09/13 10:15 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
stpedro75 said: Please. if you don't believe in God just don't post. I don't need your militant atheist input. I used to be really creative. than I started doing a bunch of shrooms. I became very arrogant because they made me feel so smart and like I was such a great artist. I had one trip where I found God but that's a whole other story. I started having some anxiety issues and started taking Prozac. than like an idiot I mixed it with shrooms and my whole life came crashing down. I now always feel like i'm dreaming. I have little emotion, no creativity. a shell of my former self. what use am I to God now? why should he save me, look what I've done to myself
uh, do you still take prozac? what you describe reminds me a lot of how other people feel on that drug. try stop taking it and find another way to deal with anxiety.
if you think your life is bad now, read this: http://www.paxilprogress.org/forums/showthread.php?t=49034 ... it's probably the most extreme thing i've ever heard or read. spoiler: there's a happy end.
Edited by moi (09/09/13 10:22 PM)
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foliocb
always running



Registered: 07/14/08
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: moi]
#18821169 - 09/09/13 10:34 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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if you only want to listen to what you want to hear than I have nothing to say to you
-------------------- ^v^
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SomeGuyX
The Ganja Mahn



Registered: 11/04/12
Posts: 1,132
Last seen: 10 months, 27 days
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: moi]
#18821255 - 09/09/13 10:51 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
stpedro75 said:
if you think your life is bad now, read this: http://www.paxilprogress.org/forums/showthread.php?t=49034 ... it's probably the most extreme thing i've ever heard or read. spoiler: there's a happy end.
Just read it... That would be terrible to go through.
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Prolific Mycognome
Extra-Dimensional Being



Registered: 09/02/13
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Last seen: 7 months, 29 days
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18821414 - 09/09/13 11:39 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Hi, let me first say that I have spent the last eight years battling with the same thing, long before I did any psychedelics. What I would recommend? More mushrooms. More mushrooms, and A PLAN for your trip, a setting with a shaman, everything.
Now, let me tell you why I say this. Your mind is in a place right now where it doesn't reset, it doesn't have the capacity to anchor itself to the plane of feeling where you are most comfortable, or even to shift into a new neural pathway. This is due to a chemical imbalance CAUSED by your own thoughts -- not the mushrooms, man. It's not anybody's fault but your own, how do I know? Because I've been there. The arrogance, the jaded attitude. It all boils down to existential boredom and a longing to be free from the rut that life seems to slump into for us depressive folks. You led yourself to this feeling, and you can find your way back by shocking your consciousness. If it doesn't feel like a good idea... don't do it. It's just a suggestion. I think some incense, plenty of WHOLE FOODS (no processed garbage), soothing music and a guide to help you in a comfortable setting where you focus on your issues would do you good.
I'd first begin with your beliefs. You believe in God, but have you experienced energy channeling, or contact with other forms of intelligence? The thing that got ME out of my depression was chi manipulation as well as dabbling in magic (militant atheists of the forum can laugh if you want) -- and I did fall back into it -- but after having an extremely intense psychedelic experience, combined with the connection to a higher consciousness, I discovered for myself how to be free, and happy, and please God all at the same time. I had always felt as though even though I knew I was right, I wasn't actually 'right'. I wasn't doing right, though I knew it. I wasn't. I learned the value of living in this continuous moment, maintaining the value of the moment as I did so. This is true freedom, my friend, and you will learn that appreciation once more if you don't dwell in the past.
It seems as though you're trapped in the Devil's playground, my friend. The bad guy in your mind has you exactly where he wants you. All of your fear, regret, anger... embodied, and manifesting those things FOR YOU, as a separate and distinctly-different part of who you are. Are you honestly going to sit there and take that? Do you want to be miserable, unproductive, not to see the beauty of the world? LOOK AT A FUCKING SUNSET BRO, LOOK AT HOW BEAUTIFUL IT IS!! The secret is to see appreciation, innocence, and beauty in everything, don't just seek it. Because no one can make you happy, only you can. You literally have to put yourself in that state again, and after my experience with this, I can tell you -- you're in for a rough new beginning. But it's all worth it, just take it in stride, put a smile on your face because you want it to be there. I hope the best for you in this life and in all other realities centered around the manifestation of pure consciousness, and I hope you find your way out of the darkness.
-------------------- "It is easy to lie to mortals who lie to themselves..." We are at your feet, patiently awaiting your return.
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Connection
Wise Man!!



Registered: 09/05/12
Posts: 599
Last seen: 1 month, 28 days
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Youll be okay dude.
-------------------- Life is an expression of countless endless words that are true for you and the universe and all the time it will come to your mind life and spirit of humanity and your life you are truly grateful to be alive you are the great one of this universe you are wise and truly endless in your nature...
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stpedro75
Mr. Dr. Cpt. Sgnt.


Registered: 12/20/12
Posts: 163
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: SomeGuyX]
#18821486 - 09/10/13 12:09 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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is exactly how I feel
-------------------- hopelessness is a lie
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Re: I'm going to hell [Re: stpedro75]
#18821497 - 09/10/13 12:13 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Try and get off the Prozac. From your op that seems to be the turning point to your problems, not so much the shrooms or your ego.
If you are referring to the Christian God, Jesus talks about anxiety and how its of no use to us in Mathew's writings.
Live in the moment. In the moment there's no time for anxiety.
Good luck.
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