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luvdemboomers
loner with a boner

Registered: 01/11/13
Posts: 5,054
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I can hear my roommate masturbate
#18811401 - 09/07/13 12:21 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yeah at night I'll hear his bed start squeaking and sometimes he will moan. At first I thought he was fucking someone, but I have been his roommate for 6 months now and I have never seen a woman over, or heard one for that matter.
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nannybooboo

Registered: 04/23/11
Posts: 325
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers] 2
#18811417 - 09/07/13 12:29 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Put the glass down and step away from the wall, sir.
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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18811418 - 09/07/13 12:29 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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From now on, everytime this happens, start playing porn and turn the volume up so he can listen to it and you won't have to hear him moaning.
--------------------
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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18811422 - 09/07/13 12:30 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
nannybooboo said: Put the glass down and step away from the wall, sir.
Also this
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Salomon
ಠ︵ಠ balance ಠ_ಠ weaver ಠ‿ಠ

Registered: 01/17/09
Posts: 25,128
Loc: America, FUCK YEAH
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: rulesq] 4
#18811512 - 09/07/13 12:54 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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start moaning outside his door, maybe he'll be into it
-------------------- EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT
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Dark_Star
train driver pervading a desktop


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,859
Loc: Uranus
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Salomon] 13
#18811520 - 09/07/13 12:57 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Squeak your bed & moan as well the next time you hear it. Then at the peak call out his name.
--------------------
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Uzziel
O_o


Registered: 12/30/10
Posts: 11,689
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Dark_Star]
#18811526 - 09/07/13 12:58 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Dark_Star said: Then at the peak call out his name.
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thizzlemaniac
राम राम



Registered: 03/27/12
Posts: 2,240
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: rulesq]
#18811528 - 09/07/13 12:59 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
rulesq said: From now on, everytime this happens, start playing porn and turn the volume up so he can listen to it and you won't have to hear him moaning.
Yea, whether you 2 are cool or not you have to troll him somehow
-------------------- Hi how are you? How high are you?
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qman
Stranger

Registered: 12/06/06
Posts: 34,927
Last seen: 2 days, 1 hour
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: thizzlemaniac]
#18811629 - 09/07/13 01:32 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Maybe he has an inflatable girlfriend.
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18811646 - 09/07/13 01:38 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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This thread is awesome, I always keep a fan in my room running on low as a drone. Keeps me from hearing shit going on outside
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leon trout
Estimated Prophet



Registered: 09/13/12
Posts: 1,089
Loc: The Timbers of Fennario
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: qman] 1
#18811647 - 09/07/13 01:38 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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you could always offer to give him a hand...
-------------------- “I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I’m more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves.” ~ St. Jerome of Marin
the bus come by & i got on, that's when it all began
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thizzlemaniac
राम राम



Registered: 03/27/12
Posts: 2,240
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: leon trout]
#18811675 - 09/07/13 01:48 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
leon trout said: you could always offer to give him a hand...

"Hey man do you need a hand in there?"
"Yo sounds like you could use a hand with something, mind if I come in?"
I guess it would be better IRL
-------------------- Hi how are you? How high are you?
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Nimpo
Big Black


Registered: 05/10/12
Posts: 2,375
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: thizzlemaniac] 3
#18811681 - 09/07/13 01:50 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Jack off with him like a real room mate
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JacksonMetaller
Stranger

Registered: 03/13/11
Posts: 13,361
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: leon trout]
#18811683 - 09/07/13 01:51 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
leon trout said: you could always offer to give him a hand...
yeah, loud moaning is an invitation to get in there and fuck him
Edited by JacksonMetaller (09/07/13 01:51 PM)
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lil_demented
Loner will lone

Registered: 09/11/06
Posts: 6,146
Last seen: 1 month, 8 days
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Thread is a win. But for real, how many of u actually moan when u jack off? i dont, i only moan to let the girl know she's doing it right.
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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: qman]
#18811703 - 09/07/13 01:58 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
qman said: Maybe he has an inflatable girlfriend. 
If that's the case, I suggest OP gets a tube of superglue and seals the dolls' orifices.
Best case scenario: roommates penor gets stuck and he has to go to E.R, OP gets tehh lolz.
Worst case scenario: the doll will be useless.
--------------------
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abltsandwich
JFK = Jelly Donut




Registered: 06/16/09
Posts: 11,537
Loc: Dildoville
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: lil_demented] 2
#18811704 - 09/07/13 01:59 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I moan when I use the candle and vaseline tek.
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lil_demented
Loner will lone

Registered: 09/11/06
Posts: 6,146
Last seen: 1 month, 8 days
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: abltsandwich]
#18811718 - 09/07/13 02:06 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
abltsandwich said: I moan when I use the candle and vaseline tek.
im trying out your tek now but im confused. do i put the Vaseline on the candle and put it in my bum? Or the Vaseline on my bum and then Insert the candle?
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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: lil_demented]
#18811731 - 09/07/13 02:10 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Nah, eat the vaseline and plug the candle. Or alternatively, burn the candle so you can drip stearine on your nipples, peepee and bunghole
--------------------
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Sham87
mashAllah


Registered: 05/16/11
Posts: 9,816
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18811736 - 09/07/13 02:11 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Easy solution: Masturbate louder than him.
--------------------
   ...once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest places if you look at it right...
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: lil_demented]
#18811761 - 09/07/13 02:17 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
lil_demented said: Thread is a win. But for real, how many of u actually moan when u jack off? i dont, i only moan to let the girl know she's doing it right. 
Yeah it's not like it's some involuntary reflex or something.
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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: psi]
#18811764 - 09/07/13 02:19 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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FWIW I usually cry when I fap
And I tend to cry a lot
--------------------
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Nimpo
Big Black


Registered: 05/10/12
Posts: 2,375
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: rulesq]
#18811779 - 09/07/13 02:23 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
rulesq said: FWIW I usually cry when I fap
And I tend to cry a lot 
Are the tears used as lubricant?
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WhoManBeing
PsychedelicYogi



Registered: 09/01/13
Posts: 3,773
Loc: Oregon
Last seen: 3 days, 21 hours
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Nimpo]
#18811781 - 09/07/13 02:24 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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take him out and find a girl for him, or both of you. yea?
-------------------- Hip, hip... WhoRAy!!! Eye was thinking the other day... ahh, thinking never done me no good.
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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Nimpo]
#18811791 - 09/07/13 02:28 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Nimpo said:
Quote:
rulesq said: FWIW I usually cry when I fap
And I tend to cry a lot 
Are the tears used as lubricant?
I'd like to say yes, but nah.
They're not gooey enough
--------------------
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 28 days
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: rulesq]
#18811805 - 09/07/13 02:32 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Years ago I sometimes heard my upstairs housemate use her vibrator. Hearing girls masturbate is on another level
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Tripsurfer]
#18811846 - 09/07/13 02:43 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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That's definitely fappable
--------------------
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: psi]
#18812021 - 09/07/13 03:47 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
psi said:
Quote:
lil_demented said: Thread is a win. But for real, how many of u actually moan when u jack off? i dont, i only moan to let the girl know she's doing it right. 
Yeah it's not like it's some involuntary reflex or something.
I thought everyone learned how to fap silently at their mom's house, this shits actually really creepy to think about
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Nimpo
Big Black


Registered: 05/10/12
Posts: 2,375
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Repertoire89]
#18812023 - 09/07/13 03:48 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I dont even make a noise when I orgasm. Im silent throughout the whole process, not even a single heavy breath mid climax
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Herbologist
Grrratata



Registered: 05/09/10
Posts: 7,471
Loc: Casa Bonita
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Nimpo]
#18812059 - 09/07/13 04:01 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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You can nonchalantly tell him over breakfast
-------------------- Shroomery Law: Don't piss off the leftist mods & their friends!
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plektheplek



Registered: 06/18/11
Posts: 3,287
Last seen: 6 years, 9 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Herbologist]
#18812092 - 09/07/13 04:13 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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lol
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mgoblue83



Registered: 03/20/13
Posts: 70
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: plektheplek]
#18812157 - 09/07/13 04:34 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Knock on the door and tell him to quite down. Should be embarrassing enough for him to at least stop the moaning.
--------------------
Give me the love that conquers all when I stumble when I fall.
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Shroomslip
Architekt



Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 2 hours, 4 minutes
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: mgoblue83]
#18812160 - 09/07/13 04:36 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Next time you hear him, leave him a bottle of lotion and a box of tissues right outside his door.. Maybe he'll get the hint.
--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way. I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today. Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear. I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear. You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline
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Powdered_Toastman



Registered: 05/30/11
Posts: 5,589
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers] 1
#18812166 - 09/07/13 04:38 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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just get super crazy and do it while hes doing it in the other room, like knock stuff over, cry and yell out why a certain someone in your life is gone. make really loud grunting moans while breathing heavily
-------------------- "I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." You are God and I am You
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brokentv

Registered: 03/02/12
Posts: 2,417
Last seen: 6 years, 8 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: WhoManBeing]
#18812205 - 09/07/13 04:56 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
WhoManBeing said: take him out and find a girl for him, or both of you. yea?
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Soulidarity
With Your Halo Slippin . . .



Registered: 07/15/12
Posts: 17,617
Loc: Atlantis
Last seen: 8 years, 1 month
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: brokentv] 2
#18812247 - 09/07/13 05:11 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Clearly Ops room mate is trying to challenge him to a game of battlefaps
It's time to break out back door sluts 9 and show him who's boss
--------------------
  R.I.P. WoodRuss67, Todcasil, TheMerryIguana, The Rompus, Lord Senate. [/url]
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Bambi
Friendly Forrest Animal




Registered: 03/22/09
Posts: 1,668
Last seen: 6 months, 29 days
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Soulidarity]
#18812269 - 09/07/13 05:16 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Soulidarity said: Clearly Ops room mate is trying to challenge him to a game of battlefaps
It's time to break out back door sluts 9 and show him who's boss
--------------------
"I want to read, talk with my friends via the computer, and enjoy my life now that people know I'm not dead. " -Rom Houben
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zZZz
jesus


Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18812313 - 09/07/13 05:27 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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so tell him you want to join him already op.
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!



Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Bambi]
#18812314 - 09/07/13 05:28 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Bambi said:
Quote:
Soulidarity said: Clearly Ops room mate is trying to challenge him to a game of battlefaps
It's time to break out back door sluts 9 and show him who's boss

-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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Bodhi of Ankou
*alternate opinion blocks path*


Registered: 06/02/09
Posts: 24,778
Loc: Soviet Canukistan
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18812317 - 09/07/13 05:28 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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He knows.
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Soulidarity
With Your Halo Slippin . . .



Registered: 07/15/12
Posts: 17,617
Loc: Atlantis
Last seen: 8 years, 1 month
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Or you could feign fapping with all the bed noises and shit, but then pretend to fall out of bed and knock some shit over loudly and yell "OH SHIT.... MATT HELP!! I BROKE MY DICK MAN THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!! MATT!! WAIT NO, NO..DON'T COME IN, IT'S COOL IM ALRIGHT I JUST HAVE TO GO TO THE DOCTORS"
--------------------
  R.I.P. WoodRuss67, Todcasil, TheMerryIguana, The Rompus, Lord Senate. [/url]
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nuentoter
conduit



Registered: 09/17/08
Posts: 2,721
Last seen: 7 years, 21 days
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Soulidarity] 1
#18812351 - 09/07/13 05:45 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Record the audio burn it to cd and play it in the a.m. during breakfast. Put a copy I his car.
--------------------
The geometry of us is no chance. We are antennae, we are tuning forks, we are receiver and transmitters of all energy. We are more than we know. - @entheolove "I found I could say things with color and shapes that I couldn't say any other way - things I had no words for" - Georgia O'Keefe I think the word is vagina
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leon trout
Estimated Prophet



Registered: 09/13/12
Posts: 1,089
Loc: The Timbers of Fennario
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: nuentoter]
#18812470 - 09/07/13 06:20 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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dunno how much you care about yr security deposit, but a string of firecrackers as he nuts would be perfect-o...
-------------------- “I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I’m more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves.” ~ St. Jerome of Marin
the bus come by & i got on, that's when it all began
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WhoManBeing
PsychedelicYogi



Registered: 09/01/13
Posts: 3,773
Loc: Oregon
Last seen: 3 days, 21 hours
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: nuentoter]
#18812867 - 09/07/13 08:11 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
nuentoter said: Record the audio burn it to cd and play it in the a.m. during breakfast. Put a copy I his car.
yea that tops it
-------------------- Hip, hip... WhoRAy!!! Eye was thinking the other day... ahh, thinking never done me no good.
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: psi]
#18812962 - 09/07/13 08:46 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
psi said:
Quote:
lil_demented said: Thread is a win. But for real, how many of u actually moan when u jack off? i dont, i only moan to let the girl know she's doing it right. 
Yeah it's not like it's some involuntary reflex or something.
look out fellas, we got a moaner!
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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Bodhi of Ankou
*alternate opinion blocks path*


Registered: 06/02/09
Posts: 24,778
Loc: Soviet Canukistan
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Sheekle]
#18813016 - 09/07/13 09:00 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Fuck that, just get a camcorder and when hes going at it pop open the door and start recording him. Post results.
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ShroomPuncher
The FunGuy



Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 988
Loc: Mother Earth
Last seen: 6 months, 17 days
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Well if he moans so much, you should understand his patterns. Right when said fapper is about to nut, delicately throw some fire crackers in his room and watch PTSD take root. Seriously, though. Abstract art all over the walls.
-------------------- Hunting Psillies? Want a sig or avatar made? Message me. [Prints in exchange would be nice, but not required]
Disclaimer: I in no way engage in violent acts against mushrooms, nor do I support or advocate such behavior.
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Soulidarity
With Your Halo Slippin . . .



Registered: 07/15/12
Posts: 17,617
Loc: Atlantis
Last seen: 8 years, 1 month
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: ShroomPuncher]
#18813067 - 09/07/13 09:14 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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--------------------
  R.I.P. WoodRuss67, Todcasil, TheMerryIguana, The Rompus, Lord Senate. [/url]
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lil_demented
Loner will lone

Registered: 09/11/06
Posts: 6,146
Last seen: 1 month, 8 days
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Soulidarity]
#18813198 - 09/07/13 10:02 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I just read through all that and I have tears in my eyes from lmao.
There is just so mich win here. I like how the community jumps to help find a solution for others problems, no matter how creepy and hilarious they may be.
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dontknow
It's all in the reflex


Registered: 07/05/13
Posts: 3,889
Last seen: 7 years, 3 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: lil_demented]
#18813248 - 09/07/13 10:18 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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My first year at college i always wondered if my roommate could hear me masturbating.. i just went for it
--------------------
The discerning heart seeks knowledge, but the mouth of a fool feeds on folly. -Proverbs 15:14
“Imagination is everything. It is the preview of Life’s coming attractions.” Albert Einstein
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luvdemboomers
loner with a boner

Registered: 01/11/13
Posts: 5,054
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: dontknow]
#18813405 - 09/07/13 11:08 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I should print this thread and slide it under his door. Only thing stopping me is I don't want my real identity linked with my shroomery identity. Too bad this isnt the anon forum.
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wtffuck


Registered: 03/31/12
Posts: 21
Last seen: 9 years, 9 days
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18813431 - 09/07/13 11:18 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
luvdemboomers said: Yeah at night I'll hear his bed start squeaking and sometimes he will moan. At first I thought he was fucking someone, but I have been his roommate for 6 months now and I have never seen a woman over, or heard one for that matter.

why do you like to listen to your roommate play with his shrimp dick
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lil_demented
Loner will lone

Registered: 09/11/06
Posts: 6,146
Last seen: 1 month, 8 days
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: luvdemboomers]
#18813433 - 09/07/13 11:19 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
luvdemboomers said: I should print this thread and slide it under his door. Only thing stopping me is I don't want my real identity linked with my shroomery identity. Too bad this isnt the anon forum.
You don't own a sharpie?
Do it! And you will become immortal. Interwebz history. A god of sorts
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mandrax360
Woodchipper Deluxe


Registered: 09/20/11
Posts: 1,892
Loc: Nelson Mandela House, Peckham
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: lil_demented]
#18813956 - 09/08/13 03:11 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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For all you know I could be your roommate and I play a recording of you flapping while you thought I was out just for shit kick while I troll your threads
But seriously next time it happens play so really cheesy 90s music
Sing along for effect and act like your having a house party
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rulesq
Bad Mogambo



Registered: 05/10/13
Posts: 5,317
Loc: Суомалиа
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: mandrax360] 1
#18813969 - 09/08/13 03:15 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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 Christian approach to OP's problem
Quote:
FIRST STEP: CONFIRM YOUR SUSPICIONS
1. Invest in a desk lamp or a strong flashlight if you don’t already have one. After lights out, if your hear the moaning or thrashing noises, quickly shine a spotlight on his bed to see if you can catch him in the act. This will also let him know that you’re fully aware of his activities.
2. Alter your schedule and come back to the dorm early from class. If he is playing with himself on your chair– and it’s highly likely that he is– you may walk in on him. This will make him uneasy about public displays and he will realize, “No time is a safe time for masturbation.”
3. If these methods do not succeed, you might want to examine his bed when he’s out of the room. Does he keep erotic magazines under his mattress? What do his sheets smell like? Masturbation leaves a sour, bleach-like odor and small damp stains that crust up around the edges.
4. Another gratification location for the habitual stroker is the shower. In this situation, milky globules of ejaculate will be left on the tile walls at knee height. The self-abuser is usually too exhausted afterward to properly clean his waste and it will congeal and yellow over time.
Quote:
SECOND STEP: SCHEDULE A TIME TO DISCUSS THE ISSUE Once you’ve collected proof of his unwelcome habit, tell your roommate that you’d like to talk about an important personal matter and set up a time when you’re both done for classes for the day.
As Pastor Mark Driscoll of Seattle’s Mars Hill Church recently noted, “Masturbation can be a form of homosexuality because it is a sexual act that does not involve a woman. If a man were to masturbate while engaged in other forms of sexual intimacy with his wife then he would not be doing so in a homosexual way. However, any man who does so without his wife in the room is bordering on homosexuality activity, particularly if he’s watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body.”
You must be careful when broaching this subject with your roommate. You don’t want him to get the impression that you’re excited by his masturbation or interested in any homo-erotic action.
Be willing to share your own rules for health and cleanliness, including whatever spiritual aspects they entail. Be prepared to open up about your feelings, about how he’s setting a bad example for you and how much you care for his health and his soul. Ask him how he’d feel if the shoe was on the other foot– wouldn’t he be upset if you masturbated very loudly each night at the same time he does?
Quote:
THIRD STEP: MAKE A GAME PLAN AND STICK TO IT! 1. Let him know that you’re fully committed to helping him curb his masturbation addiction.
2. Dismantle any protective screens meant to shield one’s bed for exploratory “private times.”
3. Challenge your roommate to see who can refrain from self-abuse the longest. Keep track and try to break each other’s records! Set up a reward for whoever is most successful during the semester. A pleasant dinner out or an excursion to a sports event will keep you both focused on a joyful completion to your efforts.
4. Let your roommate know that he can depend on you for support if he ever needs to talk about his unnatural urges. Prepare yourself with the pro-purity literature available online.
5. Free time and excess energy can lead to the distraction of masturbation. Joining a sports team is a great way to tame those restless hands!
6. The Bible offers much information about humanity’s call to corporeal purity. The Good Book is always there for you to enjoy and share!
7. If all else fails, you might try reading Scripture aloud each time you hear him pleasuring himself. Passages from the Book of Leviticus can be extemely effective.
http://christwire.org/2011/11/help-my-roommate-masturbates-too-much/
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mandrax360
Woodchipper Deluxe


Registered: 09/20/11
Posts: 1,892
Loc: Nelson Mandela House, Peckham
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: rulesq]
#18813978 - 09/08/13 03:25 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Cadence Appleton looks like a call girl
 God will not be happy with Candence showing so much leg
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MR.Merlin
Worker


Registered: 09/07/13
Posts: 88
Last seen: 7 years, 9 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: leon trout]
#18814035 - 09/08/13 04:27 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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nice quote=D
-------------------- Mushroom growing is a hobby, and any thing posted under this account is solely a replication of naturally occurring phenomena done for scientific study and observation, fully within the bounds of federal law. further more, all things stated on this site by this account are works of fiction. I am attempting to create an alter ego that is totally false to immerse myself in a character for a book.
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Shroomslip
Architekt



Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 2 hours, 4 minutes
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: rulesq]
#18814286 - 09/08/13 08:21 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Who the hell sniffs possible cum-stained sheets? lol...
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With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way. I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today. Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear. I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear. You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline
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psi
TOAST N' JAM


Registered: 09/05/99
Posts: 31,456
Loc: 613
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Shroomslip]
#18814293 - 09/08/13 08:23 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yeah it's a joke site.
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Shroomslip
Architekt



Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 2 hours, 4 minutes
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: psi]
#18814295 - 09/08/13 08:25 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Ah.. Hadn't actually went to the site, just read the above quotes.
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With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way. I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today. Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear. I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear. You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline
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Spacerific
- - - >


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 4,923
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
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Re: I can hear my roommate masturbate [Re: Shroomslip]
#18814472 - 09/08/13 09:44 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Next time the dude does it, just start with this:
Then return here and post your findings
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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