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Anonymous #1

I'm fucking miserable
    #18791578 - 09/02/13 07:28 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Please help me :frown:


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OfflinePsilosopherr
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791603 - 09/02/13 07:33 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

..................any details? :lol:


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Psilosopherr]
    #18791608 - 09/02/13 07:34 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

None really, just not a happy person. I don't know why. Just slipping back into depression, it's comfortable.


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791614 - 09/02/13 07:35 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

I can't tell anyone about it. Because there really IS no reason. I'm just tired of living.


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OfflineKing Klick
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791623 - 09/02/13 07:37 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Go wank one out.


--------------------
Your god is dead, and I killed him.

When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul



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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: King Klick]
    #18791632 - 09/02/13 07:38 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

King Klick said:
Go wank one out.



Done that twice today. Drank some too. I have a Xanax here I was considering, but I'm alone for a few days and don't wanna mix the two.


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OfflineKing Klick
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791637 - 09/02/13 07:40 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

King Klick said:
Go wank one out.



Done that twice today. Drank some too. I have a Xanax here I was considering, but I'm alone for a few days and don't wanna mix the two.



Yeah probly not a good idea.


--------------------
Your god is dead, and I killed him.

When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul



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OfflinePsilosopherr
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791642 - 09/02/13 07:41 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Man I've struggled with very similar feelings my entire life. You could use some therapy, or try to think happy thoughts.

Psilocybin has been a truly amazing treatment for depression for me in the past. It changed my life, but I still slip back into it.

Maybe try out some anti depressants? If you don't like pills, experiment with kanna and/or St. Jonhs Wort. (haven't personally tried kanna or johns wort, but read about it!)


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791647 - 09/02/13 07:41 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

What do you do when you decide to not kill yourself? I've been plagued with thoughts of suicide for awhile, and I know it's not that right choice. I will not kill myself. But like...now what? I still want to, you know? The thoughts are still there. The feelings are still there.

It's not like "I want to live" and your life turns around. You have to go back to it.


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OfflinePsilosopherr
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #18791656 - 09/02/13 07:43 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
What do you do when you decide to not kill yourself? I've been plagued with thoughts of suicide for awhile, and I know it's not that right choice. I will not kill myself. But like...now what? I still want to, you know? The thoughts are still there. The feelings are still there.

It's not like "I want to live" and your life turns around. You have to go back to it.



I've had two attempts myself, been in a mental hospital (helped somewhat)

But when I decide not to do it, I try to think about what I'm grateful for, or smoke a lot of weed. Sometimes it just takes time.

I can't think of any good advice for that question :sad:


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Psilosopherr]
    #18791659 - 09/02/13 07:43 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

rbalzer said:
Man I've struggled with very similar feelings my entire life. You could use some therapy, or try to think happy thoughts.

Psilocybin has been a truly amazing treatment for depression for me in the past. It changed my life, but I still slip back into it.

Maybe try out some anti depressants? If you don't like pills, experiment with kanna and/or St. Jonhs Wort. (haven't personally tried kanna or johns wort, but read about it!)



I tried some 5 htp recently, a few months ago I mean. I ended up getting mild serotonin poisoning. My leg wouldn't stop twitching for a few days. I took the recommended amount (1 a day).

I've been to shrinks before, one was really helpful. I got out of depression, I'm going back into it.


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: King Klick]
    #18791669 - 09/02/13 07:45 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

King Klick said:
Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

King Klick said:
Go wank one out.



Done that twice today. Drank some too. I have a Xanax here I was considering, but I'm alone for a few days and don't wanna mix the two.



Yeah probly not a good idea.



Thanks. I'd probably be okay, but I don't wanna black out and do something stupid while alone.


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791671 - 09/02/13 07:45 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Especially while depressed.


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791689 - 09/02/13 07:47 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Every awkward moment. Every single mistake and dumb decision I've ever made constantly plagues my mind and won't leave me alone. I can't stop thinking about every single dumb little mistake. Every dumb think I've ever said.

I think I've said more than most people have. I've made an ass of myself so many times.


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OfflineKing Klick
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791706 - 09/02/13 07:51 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Pm if you ever need to talk bro.


--------------------
Your god is dead, and I killed him.

When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul



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InvisibleSleepwalker
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Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 5,503
Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791745 - 09/02/13 07:59 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Everyone has regrets.  But every moment holds the possibility of a fresh start.

It's hard to climb out of depression.  Every step forward you seem to get dragged back two steps.  But eventually you can start to make progress towards the sunlight if you keep at it (apply lifestyle changes, therapy, medication as you deem necessary)


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Sleepwalker]
    #18791820 - 09/02/13 08:16 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

While taking a shit, I realized that I had been neglecting lessons I've learned. It's helped.

That is not the only time I've had realizations on the toilet. I love shitting sometimes. :laugh:


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Anonymous #2

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791922 - 09/02/13 08:41 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Please help me :frown:



Quote:

Anonymous said:

I'm right there with you life went from difficult to downright failure for me it would be so easy just to give up.


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OfflinePsilosopherr
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791928 - 09/02/13 08:41 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

I think we all spend too much time reflecting on past mistakes. You've just gotta try to come to terms with what happened I suppose. Try to look at it in a good way, like a learning experience. Something that made you the wonderfully unique person that you are today (and in time, I hope you come to love yourself)


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Psilosopherr]
    #18791945 - 09/02/13 08:46 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

rbalzer said:
I think we all spend too much time reflecting on past mistakes. You've just gotta try to come to terms with what happened I suppose. Try to look at it in a good way, like a learning experience. Something that made you the wonderfully unique person that you are today (and in time, I hope you come to love yourself)



Recently it wasn't even focusing on mistakes. It's just that my mind kept on bringing them up. "Hey remember that time ____" "Do you know what you haven't thought about in awhile? Yeah that fuck you"

It was more that the thoughts kept coming up. Thoughts just keep coming up. I don't even really have control over it. Just walking along, thinking of something irrelevant. Then all of a sudden "HEY REMEMBER WHEN", it's totally jarring and takes me out of what I was doing and sucks. The thoughts don't stop.


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OfflinePsilosopherr
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791957 - 09/02/13 08:49 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

maybe it'll just take time. Eventually, hopefully, you'll fully realize that there's no point in dwelling on that stuff forever.

consult a therapist yo


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Anonymous #1

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Psilosopherr]
    #18791970 - 09/02/13 08:51 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

It's not even dwelling. It's that the thoughts pop up randomly without warning or reason. The thoughts just jar me and make me out of it.


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OfflineSpacerific
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791976 - 09/02/13 08:52 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

You may be doing it wrong in some of the following areas (in no particular order)

- no ayahuasca ceremony lately
- no peyote sweat lodge lately
- not mushrooming enough, or doing it in a bad context or with shitty people
- not enough psy festivals, or festivals in general
- not getting laid enough with awesome or at least decent nice girl(s)
- not maintaining enough awesome hobbies, pets, outdoors activities
- you job (or current studies or whatever) may not align well with your core values & beliefs

My advice would be to get out there get in shape, mentally and physically, hit some self improvement audiobooks and videos to get your mind right, maybe hit some PUA material if you feel your skills suck, then look for some new (or old, but quality) friends. Especially friends that are open to tripping. Then trip more (with friends, not alone), fuck more, go out more, do whatever fills you with energy, be all that you can be. Go to festivals. The rules are different there.



Winter months are coming along, and if you think you're feeling shitty now, just wait until you take the sunshine away, and everything's grey and dull for several months. Don't wait for this shit to hit you, because your head won't simply fix itself, if you just do more of the same. Get out there, make shit happen.

Stay away from the Xanax, booze, porn and nigger ... sorry, junk food :lol:

MOST of depression and overthinking happens indoors while alone. I bet you're not depressed when you have :boobs: in your face, then magically you're fine.

Be indoors only when sleeping, playing with naked girls and that's about it. GTFO and be out among the people. DO NOT stay indoors, at your computer, alone and with no purpose in life. Take that food from the fridge and instead of eating it alone again, pack it and take it to the park. To the fucking sidewalk if you need to, anywhere but indoors by your miserable self. Just simply get out and follow the tits :lol:

Oh and this.


--------------------
Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.



For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it,
and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it.
- Matthew 13:16


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Anonymous #3

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18791989 - 09/02/13 08:56 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Every awkward moment. Every single mistake and dumb decision I've ever made constantly plagues my mind and won't leave me alone. I can't stop thinking about every single dumb little mistake. Every dumb think I've ever said.

I think I've said more than most people have. I've made an ass of myself so many times.




We all make mistakes

What about learning from those mistakes?

Stop doing what makes you unhappy, if something makes you unhappy it's a mistake

Do what you know makes you happy always


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OfflinePsilosopherr
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18792028 - 09/02/13 09:05 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
It's not even dwelling. It's that the thoughts pop up randomly without warning or reason. The thoughts just jar me and make me out of it.



I get it dude.

To me you're really splitting hairs there :shrug:


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OfflineSpacerific
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Psilosopherr]
    #18792598 - 09/02/13 11:02 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Oh also, I'm listening to this audiobook called The Now Habit. It's about procrastination as its main stated target, but I've found it to be very very useful for things like self-acceptance, taking it easy on myself, the very kind of trouble you seem to be struggling with.

Perfectionism, self-criticism, feeling like a complete failure when minor interactions go wrong, that's the stuff disease and misery are made of, and unfortunately some of us do this. Disproportionate amounts of negative thoughts, compared to the real consequences of our actions or mistakes.

This book has a fine way of helping you take it easy on yourself and getting back to healthier patterns, so recommended if you're the reading or listening type.


--------------------
Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.



For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it,
and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it.
- Matthew 13:16


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Anonymous #3

Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Spacerific]
    #18793668 - 09/03/13 10:03 AM (10 years, 4 months ago)

No doubt, no worries, no frustration, no fear  only acceptance and appreciation in the moment :-)

it's true, OP should try it
doubt,worries,frustration,fear never does us any good, observe it(observe thoughts), let it pass
see how pointless it is... it does you  or noone any good, it's not who you are

live in the moment instead, appreciate what you have
realize you don't need anything to be happy, happiness is only from being oneself

you can do anything you want, most things that bring happiness are mostly free

notice the miracles of nature everyday, try walking in nature/sitting in nature/having pets/houseplants
or running/cycling in nature, gives good mood for the rest of the day
but either of those brings happiness

I love my pet birds, can't be without them , I once had my mom keep them for me while I was very sick, missed them everyday for months
even though they make a lot of noise :-)  , they surprise me everyday, they are like little children
and I notice that I am happy when I wake up, when they are

the best way to be happy is to make others happy, or your pets happy


Edited by Anonymous (09/03/13 10:14 AM)


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Invisiblespiritguru123


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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18794405 - 09/03/13 01:42 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

MXE


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Offlinepcplease
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Re: I'm fucking miserable [Re: spiritguru123]
    #18795709 - 09/03/13 06:32 PM (10 years, 4 months ago)

Sunshine and excercise (excercising outside is best for me) has been a quicker and easier cure for me than any drug has been (prescribed or illicit).

Even just walking for a half hour once a day (but twice would be better!) helps with everything from my happiness to getting good sleep at night.

:sun:

P.S.

If you get depressed about nothing (existential depression) at night like I do (& these days its mostly in the past :grin:), having night-time habits helps me a lot too.

I shower about 2 hours before I'm gonna go to bed, then put on The Office or Seinfeld (I like that I don't even have to be watching to overhear something funny) while I surf the web.
Having the TV in the background helps keep me distracted and before I know it, its already been ~90 minutes and I'm starting to yawn and rub my eyes.


My private messages are enabled too by the way :wink:


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