I dont really think that I am a usual tripper. When I take a high dose I dont get the insane visuals like so many others. Ill just give a brief history of my trip log.
I found the mushroom through Terrence, his storys excited my imagination so much i had to see it for my self. I took my first 5G trip after growing my own. I was expecting visuals, and when they wernt coming I focused harder on trying to see the visuals. There for distracting me from actually focusing on what was going on. But what was going on was an explosion of thought and nerve endings erupting in ecstasy. And laughing my heart out. I think that me not seeing anything made the body effects all I had, so I over did it. I feel like I burned my self out because I would enter such high levels of ecstasy and humor that when I would be in the real world, it was hard for me to find it Sober.
So this went on for 2 years, each time hoping for a grand visual parade, and being denied it. Enter my last trip. My state of mind was surrender to what ever might happen. And a wish to regain what I lost in my trips, and to do this I had to fight the excitement.
This last trip was me calming my self when I would get to excited, its really hard to explain. But if the last trips where graphs that went straight up then came down, this trip was an up, then level, then down.
I didn't let my body be lost in pure ecstasy, I controlled it, like I wished to. Which I guess contradicts what I said about complete surrender. But this was my goal for weeks before I actually took the mushrooms, to not lose my self to the experience. And it paid off extremely. I got what I wanted from the mushroom. I asked to become whole again, and give back what I had lost to it when I lost my self to them. And I think it worked. Now that I think about it, Terrence said something about, "Not losing your self to amazement." And I think I did that for my last trips, losing my self in pure ecstasy. I feel much better about tripping now. And look forward to when the opportunity presents its self again that I might try to learn new things from the mushroom.
~Some weird thing that happened:An extreme body vibration lasting about .5 seconds, moving from my heart and pulsing my entire body all at once. Sounds like, "zzzzzzzzzzzppppppppp!" I could feel every cell reverberating from it. Very strange, seems to happen to me and others while on Tryptamines. But this was the most intense I have felt. Usually it happens in my head, and multiple times. This was just one big one. It really caught me off guard and freaked me out a little bit.
-------------------- I have no right to call myself one who knows. I was one who seeks, and I still am, but I no longer seek in the stars or in books; I’m beginning to hear the teachings of my blood pulsing within me. My story isn’t pleasant, it’s not sweet and harmonious like the invented stories; it tastes of folly and bewilderment, of madness and dream, like the life of all people who no longer want to lie to themselves. ~Hermann Hesse, Demia
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Thanks man I love writing these things. haha
-------------------- I have no right to call myself one who knows. I was one who seeks, and I still am, but I no longer seek in the stars or in books; I’m beginning to hear the teachings of my blood pulsing within me. My story isn’t pleasant, it’s not sweet and harmonious like the invented stories; it tastes of folly and bewilderment, of madness and dream, like the life of all people who no longer want to lie to themselves. ~Hermann Hesse, Demia
Edited by Sober (09/02/13 02:17 PM)
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