So, three guesses as to my closest major city. Even more dialed in, there used to be a sponsor named Ralph who had a PO Box. I can piss on that PO Box from my apartment.
WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE HIPPIE DRUGS?
Lived here all my life, 35 years, and it's like the shit just up and disappeared. You want crack? We got it. Coke? Yep. Junk? By the truckload. Assholes run into you on the street and ask if you want shards. No thx fuckface, I like my teeth.
Somehow, ALL high-grade pot just magically turned into Kush. No, that is not Kush. That fuel smell? That incredible high? Chemdawg. Go back to dealer school, kid.
And when THE FUCK did heroin turn into "blow?" There goes Detroit fucking it up for everybody else. Again w/the going back to dealer school.
The real point:
Shrooms or acid? Sorry pal, you're fucked. They just don't exist here.
Yes, I've looked in forest preserves (today after the rain even), w/no success. Pastures? The only collections of cows we have here are in grocery stores and steakhouses.
My GF and her kid are out of town ALL FUCKING WEEKEND for a wedding and all I wanted to do is trip. Put out feelers two months ago to my network - nothing. So I went street. The street has nothing for ya unless it'll ruin your life.
So now I'm stuck at home, with pot that's so "middle of the road" it's absurd, watching shitty college football.
FML.
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