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windowlikcer
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Registered: 11/14/11
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Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober,
#18770446 - 08/28/13 08:40 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Everything looks like a pointalist painting, and I get the "breathing walls" effect as well. All the time, whether I'm on psychedelics or not.
Its yet another factor making me realize that reality is utterly no different from a dream. Just an image whipped up by the consciousness which I am and yet am not. There is no point in clinging to the world or to the roller coaster of life and death. It is all emptiness, and when the dream of your current life fades and the next one takes its place you won't even remember all these random feelings and emotional attachments you have had to simple images in your mind.
Anyone else have these persistent, saturating effects? I don't feel any fear that I am going insane, I am more stable in real world matters and mental health than ever. I just feel no connection to the world anymore, it is just a wavy, colorfully sparkling image with no substance, no lasting presence of any kind.
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TheMule73
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18770486 - 08/28/13 08:50 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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How long have you been sober?
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theRAPeutic
Hueman


Registered: 07/22/13
Posts: 8,702
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: TheMule73]
#18770501 - 08/28/13 08:54 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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HPPD
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Agentchewy
Pantheism.


Registered: 12/12/12
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: TheMule73]
#18770504 - 08/28/13 08:55 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Those feelings will fade, You're abusing the power of the mind negatively obviously.
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself. You are the very fabric of existence itself. A spiritual being.
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If I knew the way, I would take you home.
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Blazer420
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy]
#18770528 - 08/28/13 09:00 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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These thoughts/feelings will subside in a couple weeks+
-------------------- ~ I used to get high on life, until I realized life was cut with morons ~ * You need 2 wake up and smell the music! * -We are all computer data in a materialistic world- |Sometimes you have to lose yourself, to find anything|
 
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LuSiD enthusiast
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy] 1
#18770530 - 08/28/13 09:00 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I bet if you tripped again the walls breathing would be entirely different then they are now and you wouldn't even consider the sober walls breathing.
-------------------- I'm addicted to coke, weed, booze, ludes and speed. Not LSD, you can't get addicted to LSD, it was built by scientists. I ain't got no demons that gonna get woke. In erowid we trust. Just take your damn pills and don't ask any questions, you'll be fine.
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windowlikcer
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy]
#18770535 - 08/28/13 09:01 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Agentchewy said: Those feelings will fade, You're abusing the power of the mind negatively obviously.
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself. You are the very fabric of existence itself. A spiritual being.
I do realize that. In fact that is exactly what I'm saying. There is no world outside of mind. I feel no attachment to the world because I feel that it is myself. If it is negative abuse of my mind, why do I feel so much peace?
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Agentchewy
Pantheism.


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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18770552 - 08/28/13 09:03 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Well the wording threw me off, just be safe,the line between genius and insanity, enlightenment and psychosis is quite fine, and sometimes breaks are lifesavers
Edit,,
Everyone wants to say their yoga, works better or faster but true enlightenment is being at peace with the level you are at
--------------------
If I knew the way, I would take you home.
Edited by Agentchewy (08/28/13 09:05 PM)
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windowlikcer
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Quote:
LuSiD enthusiast said: I bet if you tripped again the walls breathing would be entirely different then they are now and you wouldn't even consider the sober walls breathing.
I definitely agree. Same goes for the matrix of jewels laid over everything I see. However, they still happen when I'm sober, even if I cannot lose myself in them the way one might under the influence...
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windowlikcer
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy]
#18770571 - 08/28/13 09:07 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Agentchewy said: Well the wording threw me off, just be safe,the line between genius and insanity, enlightenment and psychosis is quite fine, and sometimes breaks are lifesavers
Thank you for the support.
It is somewhat frustrating that there are experiences like this being had by so many people yet there is no real place for it in our society. No vocabulary, no knowledge, no answers. Yet at the same time, on a much deeper level, I am not concerned with answers because answers would be as empty as every other mental event.
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Labs4858


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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18770608 - 08/28/13 09:14 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Ive been sober for a couple weeks now. Effects were pretty apparent and now they are starting to get noticeably better.
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windowlikcer
Stranger

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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Labs4858]
#18770637 - 08/28/13 09:21 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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These effects aren't something that started happening after a particular trip. The visual effects have been happening at least subtly as long as I can remember. However, it seems that psychedelics have brought them out to the forefront of my attention much more than they were during the first 20 years of my life which I spent stone cold sober.
Reality is a strange place...
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LuSiD enthusiast
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18770767 - 08/28/13 09:40 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I've noticed tons more of everyday optical illusions thanks to tripping. Troxler effect is one. Stare at yourself in the mirror and let your eyes unfocus and you'll start to look like a ghost (scientific evidence supports this and it's where the childhood game bloody mary originated) positive and negative afterimages is andother one. Stare and squint at the screen long enough and the letters will kind of expand up or down like light spectrums (easiest way to explain something, and if you read erowid reports long enough while tired this is probably.the most notable place i've seen it due to the color scheme.) Light spectrums is another one i noticed pretripping, but i never really noticed color changes in any light spectrum ever, whereas post first acid trip i can kind of see colors fading in a light spectrum if i squint lookimg at a foggy plate of glass with a street light or some light source on the other side. Look up into a plain blue sky,it's not really static but it'll be so bright that your eyes don't just see a plain blue sky, rather some sort of static disruption to protect your eyes from colorblinding yourself from taking to much of one color in at once (my theory, that or it's a variation of the troxler effect)
I don't doubt the existence of hppd, but i also feel that a large number of people who claim to have it are just noticing minor optical illusions your brain played on you for years and and you just become so used to it you had never noticed some of these minor effects, kind of like you might not notice your vision going bad until you look through a pair of glasses for the first time in years.
-------------------- I'm addicted to coke, weed, booze, ludes and speed. Not LSD, you can't get addicted to LSD, it was built by scientists. I ain't got no demons that gonna get woke. In erowid we trust. Just take your damn pills and don't ask any questions, you'll be fine.
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windowlikcer
Stranger

Registered: 11/14/11
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Quote:
LuSiD enthusiast said: I've noticed tons more of everyday optical illusions thanks to tripping. Troxler effect is one. Stare at yourself in the mirror and let your eyes unfocus and you'll start to look like a ghost (scientific evidence supports this and it's where the childhood game bloody mary originated) positive and negative afterimages is andother one. Stare and squint at the screen long enough and the letters will kind of expand up or down like light spectrums (easiest way to explain something, and if you read erowid reports long enough while tired this is probably.the most notable place i've seen it due to the color scheme.) Light spectrums is another one i noticed pretripping, but i never really noticed color changes in any light spectrum ever, whereas post first acid trip i can kind of see colors fading in a light spectrum if i squint lookimg at a foggy plate of glass with a street light or some light source on the other side. Look up into a plain blue sky,it's not really static but it'll be so bright that your eyes don't just see a plain blue sky, rather some sort of static disruption to protect your eyes from colorblinding yourself from taking to much of one color in at once (my theory, that or it's a variation of the troxler effect)
I don't doubt the existence of hppd, but i also feel that a large number of people who claim to have it are just noticing minor optical illusions your brain played on you for years and and you just become so used to it you had never noticed some of these minor effects, kind of like you might not notice your vision going bad until you look through a pair of glasses for the first time in years.
Haha I have experienced the same phenomenon while reading Erowid reports!
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sailing
China Cat Sunflower



Registered: 09/21/11
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Loc: United States
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer] 1
#18771300 - 08/28/13 11:50 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Ive been sober for about 5 months now and i still get it. the breathing is only sometimes, but the visual static is constant and pretty strong.
it will fade, but it will take a long time. do yourself a favor, and let your brain recover, trust me, the depersonalization is not worth it.
-------------------- Love is the deep spiritual connection between the self and all things. We are all a part of the same universe. Crazy cat peekin through a lace bandanna,like a one eyed cheshire, like a diamond eyed jack.
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: sailing]
#18771839 - 08/29/13 04:37 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Basically what you have been told is correct.
HPPD and depersonalization happen commonly for trippers, especially frequent trippers.
The effects do tend to fade/vanish but not in all cases.
The best thing to do is not care about it. It is no big deal. Hell, the visuals are kind of fun. Live life don't dwell on the past. You have simply seen the world in a new light. That effect can linger. Remember, nobody but you can see through your eyes. Nobody can tell.
Depersonalization simply requires repersonalization. Make the effort to engage in friendships and family. It is simply feeling like nobody but you understands what you have learned so why bother? Well, bother. We are social beings, and we need practice. Socialize and your depersonalization will fade before you know it. Do fun things with people. You will soon see that fun is important even while not tripping, and you can have fun with people who may never trip. Your friends and family, even though they may not understand the psychonaut in you, still care deeply for you. Not only will it cure your depersonalization, it will make it less likely to happen in the future.
At my age and experience level, depersonalization is no longer an issue with tripping. I trip when I trip and I sober when I am sober. HPPD can still get me from time to time though. Especially after a BIG trip.
I suspect depersonalization is most common amongst young trippers, who have fears of their parents or society coming down on them for what they have learned during their trips. I find tripping with friends aids in reducing the risk of depersonalization as well, since you are all in it together.
Main thing, the less you dwell on the side effects, the quicker they tend to go away.
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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Lord_McLovin
mad scientist on shrooms



Registered: 04/09/11
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Rose]
#18771860 - 08/29/13 04:51 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
HPPD and depersonalization happen commonly for trippers, especially frequent trippers.
That is not true, for example, have a look at the people in the Native American Church and you will not find a single case. That's also why I agree with you in the sense that diving into the experience as a well-trusted community is safer than playing the lone psychonaut.
I also don't dare to tell you, OP, what to do. If it is not a problematic situation for you, there is no need for my advice.
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Lord_McLovin]
#18771872 - 08/29/13 05:03 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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You had to quote the one line I was going to edit.
I should have said, "Depersonalization happens most often to young trippers who don't feel like society would appreciate the fact that they have tripped in the first place."
Something like that. It is getting late here. I may review my thoughts tomorrow and try to make my point clearer.
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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crkhd
☾☼☽


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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Rose]
#18771915 - 08/29/13 05:46 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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It's not HPPD. It's THE Trip.
Reality is The Trip. It's fluid. Psychedelics bring it out.
The walls are always breathing. You breathe out, the air molecules hit off the walls. They breathe.
If you are a programmer, send data codes to the visual matrix and it WILL respond. This is the essence of Self-inquiry meditation and I understand now how Ram Dass & Co could drop acid and be on his merry way.
-------------------- "Everything there is, and all that there is, is a Pattern of unspeakable proportion. The Pattern contains everything that is, completely fixed in succession, all the minimal particles interconnected in every way that is. Every way that is is not every conceivable way, because not everything that can be conceived is manifest in the pattern." "THE Human, you, is a miniscule but essential part of that pattern. In it lies complete fulfillment. It will never become something it is not, but it will never need to be anything else." - Wiccan_Seeker "If boring drudgery was the way of the universe, everything would have killed itself long ago." - Spacerific
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Lord_McLovin
mad scientist on shrooms



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Rose]
#18771937 - 08/29/13 06:00 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Still, I would not agree completely.
From my experience, the dangers of psychedelics, which are almost purely psychological, are mainly from improper use of these substances. In terms of what we should define as proper use to avoid those risks, I would suggest to take a look at history. They have either been used as a part of a communal ritual most often in a spiritual and I would also say hedonistic context or by shamans to heal and to discover the realm of the unconscious (= the spirit world). In my mind, putting those uses into a modern frame should be our aim as a psychedelic community - and of course this includes the need to create the proper legal framework. Users of psychedelics tend to be white guys in their twenties or thirties at most, so I only see correlation, not causality.
As far as OP goes, it does not sound pathological. We should be careful with judging his state of mind as bad just because it is not normal in our terms.
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Lord_McLovin]
#18771944 - 08/29/13 06:03 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I think we see eye to eye but live in different time zones. It is past my bed time. My best posts of the day are behind me.
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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Lord_McLovin
mad scientist on shrooms



Registered: 04/09/11
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Rose]
#18771950 - 08/29/13 06:05 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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You are awfully correct with this assumption. It's around 2 o'clock in the afternoon here.
Safe dream travels to you.
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Lord_McLovin]
#18771959 - 08/29/13 06:10 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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2 AM here. Night!
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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JacksonMetaller
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Rose]
#18772022 - 08/29/13 07:22 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Curious OP... How often did you trip?
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Shortknight



Registered: 02/25/13
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One think I found out lately... Do you remember being a kid, and if you layed down on the grass or anywhere and stared up into the blue sky you could see little silver flakes floating around? Well I was doing some heavy concentrating the other day while I had lots of time to day dream and I found out that they were just the flight paths or tracers from bugs!
I noticed that I couldnt see any silver flakes at all, until I observed a fly or mosquito or any flying insect fly by, then after it had left if I concentrated hard enough I could still see these little flakes. And I found by keeping my concentration I could get the blue sky pretty dance like haha Coolest thing is though, I first found this out while I was 8 or 9, and have finally put it into context!
 Shorty
-------------------- Did I say it too loud? Big heart? Or a little misleading!
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sailing
China Cat Sunflower



Registered: 09/21/11
Posts: 3,534
Loc: United States
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: crkhd]
#18772207 - 08/29/13 09:18 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
crkhd said: It's not HPPD. It's THE Trip.
Reality is The Trip. It's fluid. Psychedelics bring it out.
The walls are always breathing. You breathe out, the air molecules hit off the walls. They breathe.
If you are a programmer, send data codes to the visual matrix and it WILL respond. This is the essence of Self-inquiry meditation and I understand now how Ram Dass & Co could drop acid and be on his merry way.
Thats deep, i like that
-------------------- Love is the deep spiritual connection between the self and all things. We are all a part of the same universe. Crazy cat peekin through a lace bandanna,like a one eyed cheshire, like a diamond eyed jack.
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mushroomfred
Cosmic Tripper



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: sailing]
#18772213 - 08/29/13 09:21 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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A mind expanded cannot go back to it's original dimensions.
Don't consider it a curse... you essentially opened your signal receiver to new sensory inputs. If you don't focus on it and cease psychedelic use things will calm down in time.
--------------------
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18772504 - 08/29/13 10:50 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
windowlikcer said: It is somewhat frustrating that there are experiences like this being had by so many people yet there is no real place for it in our society. No vocabulary, no knowledge, no answers. Yet at the same time, on a much deeper level, I am not concerned with answers because answers would be as empty as every other mental event.
There IS no vocabulary for it, not directly (though Sanskrit comes close), but there is plenty of knowledge about it. There are no "answers," that's just a fool's game. 
PS
--------------------
if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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JacksonMetaller
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: PrimalSoup]
#18772672 - 08/29/13 11:29 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
PrimalSoup said:
Quote:
windowlikcer said: It is somewhat frustrating that there are experiences like this being had by so many people yet there is no real place for it in our society. No vocabulary, no knowledge, no answers. Yet at the same time, on a much deeper level, I am not concerned with answers because answers would be as empty as every other mental event.
There IS no vocabulary for it, not directly (though Sanskrit comes close), but there is plenty of knowledge about it. There are no "answers," that's just a fool's game. 
PS
I disagree respectfully. I've always got a pretty solid answer on psychedelics. "just be". As you are. No playing games with who or what you should be. Just exist. Of course you have to look at the larger perspective of psychedelic experiences and not pick out little specific revelations, but rather the common theme that they all have. Just my experience though. Some people definitely read in too deeply so I get what you're saying
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



Registered: 11/17/09
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Searching for answers gets you nowhere, but asking questions is very helpful. May not have said that quite right, 3 days without enough sleep and I'm somewhat narco at this point. 
"Just experience" isn't an answer, it's an instruction. 
PS
--------------------
if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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JacksonMetaller
Stranger

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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: PrimalSoup]
#18773119 - 08/29/13 01:28 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
PrimalSoup said: Searching for answers gets you nowhere, but asking questions is very helpful. May not have said that quite right, 3 days without enough sleep and I'm somewhat narco at this point. 
"Just experience" isn't an answer, it's an instruction. 
PS
This is true, but in my head it is also the answer to happy and mentally healthy living. I do get what you are saying though good sir. It's not so much what the drug teaches you but rather what the experience does. Understanding that at fundamental levels you are capable of coexisting with diverse beings. That when you fight life you are only making things worse etc. I guess those things aren't unique to psychedelics though. They just amplify the impact it has
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KingKnowledge
Around



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I personally enjoy mild HPPD.
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



Registered: 11/17/09
Posts: 13,568
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Quote:
This is true, but in my head it is also the answer to happy and mentally healthy living. I do get what you are saying though good sir. It's not so much what the drug teaches you but rather what the experience does. Understanding that at fundamental levels you are capable of coexisting with diverse beings. That when you fight life you are only making things worse etc. I guess those things aren't unique to psychedelics though. They just amplify the impact it has
I think we're talking about two different things here. Some people (not saying you or the OP does, just some people) really ARE looking for answers, like "why are we here?" "what is the purpose of everything?" and they aren't gonna get answers like that.
What you're talking about is a method not an answer. It's the same with meditation - which actually doesn't cause HPPD - it doesn't answer your questions it shows you why the questions are pointless.
But that's all a dead horse for me and I can't explain it to anybody anymore - you just have to go there for yourself and stop thinking.
I suspect that's enough for today.
PS
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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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mr sniffles
expert textpert


Registered: 06/03/13
Posts: 1,663
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: PrimalSoup]
#18773358 - 08/29/13 02:22 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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i feel like psychedelics made me more sensitive to stimuli but i guess im starting to learn how to handle it and integrate it
--------------------
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: mr sniffles]
#18773399 - 08/29/13 02:32 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yeah, that's one of the great permanent side effects, IME. Colors, sounds, almost all senses get that treatment. 
PS
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JacksonMetaller
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: PrimalSoup]
#18773485 - 08/29/13 02:49 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
PrimalSoup said:
Quote:
This is true, but in my head it is also the answer to happy and mentally healthy living. I do get what you are saying though good sir. It's not so much what the drug teaches you but rather what the experience does. Understanding that at fundamental levels you are capable of coexisting with diverse beings. That when you fight life you are only making things worse etc. I guess those things aren't unique to psychedelics though. They just amplify the impact it has
I think we're talking about two different things here. Some people (not saying you or the OP does, just some people) really ARE looking for answers, like "why are we here?" "what is the purpose of everything?" and they aren't gonna get answers like that.
What you're talking about is a method not an answer. It's the same with meditation - which actually doesn't cause HPPD - it doesn't answer your questions it shows you why the questions are pointless.
But that's all a dead horse for me and I can't explain it to anybody anymore - you just have to go there for yourself and stop thinking.
I suspect that's enough for today.
PS
Ah I gotcha. That makes sense. It's not the word of god condensed to a chemical messenger. Totally agree
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Novnia
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wow. you should probably dial back a bit and let reality settle down before you dose again.
doing psycadelics is fun and insightful and can be helpful. but as with everything, abuse can lead down a dark road.
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HostDisorder
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: crkhd]
#18773900 - 08/29/13 04:20 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
crkhd said: It's not HPPD. It's THE Trip.
Reality is The Trip. It's fluid. Psychedelics bring it out.
The walls are always breathing. You breathe out, the air molecules hit off the walls. They breathe.
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crkhd
☾☼☽


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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: HostDisorder]
#18774089 - 08/29/13 05:00 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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One way of exerting magical control over Reality is to use mandala visualisation. When you visualise a Mandala and behold it right in your imagination crystal clear and fully seen as vivid and solid as what's in front of you, you can program your body at will and activate/talk to any organ and do anything, let the imagination exploration run wild and see what abilities you can *create*, yes, *create* because by the application of directed thought we create intricate systems of imagination and power and manifestation: martial arts controlling bioelectricity, science creating technology, all sorts.
We as a species have the magical power of imagination and manifestation and the supreme beauty of the human form is that we are literally whooping stuff out of our asses and it is springing forth into reality and from there onwards develops a sensible and permanently abiding framework. Suddenly, phones, the internet, and all manner of things.
Wait till you see what the future beholds, EEG is the future! We can invent senses willy nilly, entire brand new senses of Reality. Soon we will be able to sense in the entire EM frequency band using EEG/neurofeedback technology.
-------------------- "Everything there is, and all that there is, is a Pattern of unspeakable proportion. The Pattern contains everything that is, completely fixed in succession, all the minimal particles interconnected in every way that is. Every way that is is not every conceivable way, because not everything that can be conceived is manifest in the pattern." "THE Human, you, is a miniscule but essential part of that pattern. In it lies complete fulfillment. It will never become something it is not, but it will never need to be anything else." - Wiccan_Seeker "If boring drudgery was the way of the universe, everything would have killed itself long ago." - Spacerific
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mr sniffles
expert textpert


Registered: 06/03/13
Posts: 1,663
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: PrimalSoup]
#18774197 - 08/29/13 05:25 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
PrimalSoup said: Yeah, that's one of the great permanent side effects, IME. Colors, sounds, almost all senses get that treatment. 
PS
lol in some cases of doing your own thing sometimes youre not asking to be a satellite dish for everything thats being thrown around though, thats my only complaint
but the bright side is you get to develop your brain to absorb more information effeciently i guess
--------------------
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windowlikcer
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Let me again stress that I do not feel a sense of negativity regarding this shift in my vision. In fact, the more neutral my state of mind at the time the more apparent the vision becomes (it is most pronounced during meditation).
I didn't mean to make it seem like it was a problem for me.
The associated "depersonalization" and "derealization" are not threatening to me. I have felt this way as long as I can remember, from a very young age.
As I said in my OP, I have never been healthier mentally or physically. My life is busy with work, college, musical endeavoring and a committed relationship and I am not destructively engaged with life. I just feel that life is inherently empty. It is like a movie projected on a screen. Objects appear on the screen, but they are just images. Every attachment I have to my world crumbles under the knowledge that it is an empty image.
I want to know if anyone else understands what I mean by this.
I am not trying to be dogmatic or say "this is the way the universe works". It is a very personal shift in awareness. It has also amplified after I spent a couple days of meditation under the instruction of a Tibetan lama recently. I have also been getting massive oscillating vibrations along my spine and in my head, they leave my head literally buzzing and leave my vision bathed in white light.
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



Registered: 11/17/09
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18774690 - 08/29/13 07:22 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
I just feel that life is inherently empty.
Well, that's true. It's not a bad thing though. 
PS
--------------------
if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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windowlikcer
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: PrimalSoup]
#18774765 - 08/29/13 07:38 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I agree. Not a bad thing at all.
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Lord_McLovin
mad scientist on shrooms



Registered: 04/09/11
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18776958 - 08/30/13 11:20 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
I want to know if anyone else understands what I mean by this.
I have a rough idea, but I haven't been there myself. It's what some people develop before they die. True peace and loss of attachment.
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



Registered: 11/17/09
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18777621 - 08/30/13 02:23 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
windowlikcer said: I agree. Not a bad thing at all.
Thinking about it a bit more, this fundamental emptiness (or the perception of its inherent nature) is an important part of Buddhist insight. Clinging to the separation of imaginary things (what the unenlightened mind perceives) is one of the roots of suffering.
PS
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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy]
#18777747 - 08/30/13 02:47 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Agentchewy said:
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself.
I have read this explanation so many times but just now I suddenly understood was what meant thanks!
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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sailing
China Cat Sunflower



Registered: 09/21/11
Posts: 3,534
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Tripsurfer]
#18777795 - 08/30/13 02:57 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Tripsurfer said:
Quote:
Agentchewy said:
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself.
I have read this explanation so many times but just now I suddenly understood was what meant thanks!
its weird how something so simple can be so difficult to comprehend. i wish more people understood this concept.
-------------------- Love is the deep spiritual connection between the self and all things. We are all a part of the same universe. Crazy cat peekin through a lace bandanna,like a one eyed cheshire, like a diamond eyed jack.
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HuskyKing
Explorer



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: sailing]
#18778152 - 08/30/13 04:15 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Far out dude
-------------------- Friend- So how high are you guys right now on a scale of 1 to 10? Me- 70
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Lord_McLovin
mad scientist on shrooms



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: sailing]
#18778564 - 08/30/13 06:00 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
sailing said:
Quote:
Tripsurfer said:
Quote:
Agentchewy said:
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself.
I have read this explanation so many times but just now I suddenly understood was what meant thanks!
its weird how something so simple can be so difficult to comprehend. i wish more people understood this concept.
It's so difficult to comprehend, because this is a very non-local concept. Classical Mechanics, as a purely mathematical theory, doen't work that way. And, of course, this is thus also true of the world we perceive.
EDIT:
Edited by Lord_McLovin (08/30/13 06:01 PM)
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JohnTayler320
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Lord_McLovin]
#18779019 - 08/30/13 07:50 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I do know what u mean about the life is a movie projector. I have also delt with that feeling before. Had nothing to do with trippin as I was totally clean at that age in my life. I experimented with this feeling and could kinda run on auto pilot thru the boring (work) part of the days and kinda slow down the enjoyable times. Hrm, hard to explain. Was beneficial at the time as my life was in a ruff spot so kinda helped me thru that point in my life. As things got better in my life found it not to be beneficial anymore as I wanted to experience every aspect of my life. How I exactly merged out of this state I'm not sure. But I would assume it would be to changing my life around to where I was enjoying work, life, friends,etc. And wanted to be reattached. Sorry if I'm just babbling here very tricky feeling to describe.
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windowlikcer
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: JohnTayler320]
#18779240 - 08/30/13 08:55 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I definitely know what you mean.
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Dr.Dankhead
Uhh...doctor gonzo?



Registered: 03/29/13
Posts: 5,187
Loc: Breathing down your neck
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18779254 - 08/30/13 09:00 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
windowlikcer said: Everything looks like a pointalist painting, and I get the "breathing walls" effect as well. All the time, whether I'm on psychedelics or not.
Its yet another factor making me realize that reality is utterly no different from a dream. Just an image whipped up by the consciousness which I am and yet am not. There is no point in clinging to the world or to the roller coaster of life and death. It is all emptiness, and when the dream of your current life fades and the next one takes its place you won't even remember all these random feelings and emotional attachments you have had to simple images in your mind.
Anyone else have these persistent, saturating effects? I don't feel any fear that I am going insane, I am more stable in real world matters and mental health than ever. I just feel no connection to the world anymore, it is just a wavy, colorfully sparkling image with no substance, no lasting presence of any kind.
I don't get this to the same severity as you, but after quitting opiates (after 3 years, use everyday) Sober life....... Sucks... I feel like there's no reason to live and work to keep myself fed and continue that routine tell i die... Ill never be remeber, and frankly i feel more crazy sober then i do when I'm high...
I think you need to find something you love to do, to bring back that special sparkle you speak of.
I'm sorry to hear I'm not the only one..
Good luck my brethren
--------------------
**need a check up?** **im a Doctor**
         i sometimes wish I was a wormy, wiggling all in the cold dirt...tickle tackle pickle dickle think a mackshift thought of broken words broken gears and words of conundrums..I'm not a weiner doctor so take that shit to dr. Gonz free boob inplant consultations.. Photo required
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Agentchewy
Pantheism.


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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Dr.Dankhead]
#18779563 - 08/30/13 10:29 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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--------------------
If I knew the way, I would take you home.
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JohnTayler320
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy]
#18780680 - 08/31/13 09:16 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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That's awesome
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Jesus Cristo
High on Drugs



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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: JohnTayler320]
#18780740 - 08/31/13 09:46 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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It's not HPPD if I get visuals and trippy thoughts only when smoking, right? Can smoking really good weed cause this too?
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HostDisorder
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Jesus Cristo]
#18781453 - 08/31/13 01:56 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jesus Cristo said: It's not HPPD if I get visuals and trippy thoughts only when smoking, right? Can smoking really good weed cause this too?
Considering cannabis is a psychdelic, yeah.
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