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windowlikcer
Stranger

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 527
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Let me again stress that I do not feel a sense of negativity regarding this shift in my vision. In fact, the more neutral my state of mind at the time the more apparent the vision becomes (it is most pronounced during meditation).
I didn't mean to make it seem like it was a problem for me.
The associated "depersonalization" and "derealization" are not threatening to me. I have felt this way as long as I can remember, from a very young age.
As I said in my OP, I have never been healthier mentally or physically. My life is busy with work, college, musical endeavoring and a committed relationship and I am not destructively engaged with life. I just feel that life is inherently empty. It is like a movie projected on a screen. Objects appear on the screen, but they are just images. Every attachment I have to my world crumbles under the knowledge that it is an empty image.
I want to know if anyone else understands what I mean by this.
I am not trying to be dogmatic or say "this is the way the universe works". It is a very personal shift in awareness. It has also amplified after I spent a couple days of meditation under the instruction of a Tibetan lama recently. I have also been getting massive oscillating vibrations along my spine and in my head, they leave my head literally buzzing and leave my vision bathed in white light.
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



Registered: 11/17/09
Posts: 13,568
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18774690 - 08/29/13 07:22 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
I just feel that life is inherently empty.
Well, that's true. It's not a bad thing though. 
PS
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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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windowlikcer
Stranger

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 527
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: PrimalSoup]
#18774765 - 08/29/13 07:38 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I agree. Not a bad thing at all.
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Lord_McLovin
mad scientist on shrooms



Registered: 04/09/11
Posts: 3,071
Loc: infinite dimensional void
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18776958 - 08/30/13 11:20 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
I want to know if anyone else understands what I mean by this.
I have a rough idea, but I haven't been there myself. It's what some people develop before they die. True peace and loss of attachment.
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PrimalSoup
hyperspatial illuminations



Registered: 11/17/09
Posts: 13,568
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18777621 - 08/30/13 02:23 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
windowlikcer said: I agree. Not a bad thing at all.
Thinking about it a bit more, this fundamental emptiness (or the perception of its inherent nature) is an important part of Buddhist insight. Clinging to the separation of imaginary things (what the unenlightened mind perceives) is one of the roots of suffering.
PS
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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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Tripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!



Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward
Last seen: 3 months, 28 days
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy]
#18777747 - 08/30/13 02:47 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Agentchewy said:
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself.
I have read this explanation so many times but just now I suddenly understood was what meant thanks!
-------------------- Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros... A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.

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sailing
China Cat Sunflower



Registered: 09/21/11
Posts: 3,534
Loc: United States
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Tripsurfer]
#18777795 - 08/30/13 02:57 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Tripsurfer said:
Quote:
Agentchewy said:
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself.
I have read this explanation so many times but just now I suddenly understood was what meant thanks!
its weird how something so simple can be so difficult to comprehend. i wish more people understood this concept.
-------------------- Love is the deep spiritual connection between the self and all things. We are all a part of the same universe. Crazy cat peekin through a lace bandanna,like a one eyed cheshire, like a diamond eyed jack.
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HuskyKing
Explorer



Registered: 05/18/13
Posts: 105
Loc: California
Last seen: 10 years, 4 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: sailing]
#18778152 - 08/30/13 04:15 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Far out dude
-------------------- Friend- So how high are you guys right now on a scale of 1 to 10? Me- 70
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Lord_McLovin
mad scientist on shrooms



Registered: 04/09/11
Posts: 3,071
Loc: infinite dimensional void
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: sailing]
#18778564 - 08/30/13 06:00 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
sailing said:
Quote:
Tripsurfer said:
Quote:
Agentchewy said:
You need to realize that this world that you feel no attachment to is you. You are made of it and in effect you are the universe experiencing itself.
I have read this explanation so many times but just now I suddenly understood was what meant thanks!
its weird how something so simple can be so difficult to comprehend. i wish more people understood this concept.
It's so difficult to comprehend, because this is a very non-local concept. Classical Mechanics, as a purely mathematical theory, doen't work that way. And, of course, this is thus also true of the world we perceive.
EDIT:
Edited by Lord_McLovin (08/30/13 06:01 PM)
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JohnTayler320
Stranger

Registered: 07/27/13
Posts: 65
Last seen: 9 years, 10 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Lord_McLovin]
#18779019 - 08/30/13 07:50 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I do know what u mean about the life is a movie projector. I have also delt with that feeling before. Had nothing to do with trippin as I was totally clean at that age in my life. I experimented with this feeling and could kinda run on auto pilot thru the boring (work) part of the days and kinda slow down the enjoyable times. Hrm, hard to explain. Was beneficial at the time as my life was in a ruff spot so kinda helped me thru that point in my life. As things got better in my life found it not to be beneficial anymore as I wanted to experience every aspect of my life. How I exactly merged out of this state I'm not sure. But I would assume it would be to changing my life around to where I was enjoying work, life, friends,etc. And wanted to be reattached. Sorry if I'm just babbling here very tricky feeling to describe.
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windowlikcer
Stranger

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 527
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: JohnTayler320]
#18779240 - 08/30/13 08:55 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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I definitely know what you mean.
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Dr.Dankhead
Uhh...doctor gonzo?



Registered: 03/29/13
Posts: 5,187
Loc: Breathing down your neck
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: windowlikcer]
#18779254 - 08/30/13 09:00 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
windowlikcer said: Everything looks like a pointalist painting, and I get the "breathing walls" effect as well. All the time, whether I'm on psychedelics or not.
Its yet another factor making me realize that reality is utterly no different from a dream. Just an image whipped up by the consciousness which I am and yet am not. There is no point in clinging to the world or to the roller coaster of life and death. It is all emptiness, and when the dream of your current life fades and the next one takes its place you won't even remember all these random feelings and emotional attachments you have had to simple images in your mind.
Anyone else have these persistent, saturating effects? I don't feel any fear that I am going insane, I am more stable in real world matters and mental health than ever. I just feel no connection to the world anymore, it is just a wavy, colorfully sparkling image with no substance, no lasting presence of any kind.
I don't get this to the same severity as you, but after quitting opiates (after 3 years, use everyday) Sober life....... Sucks... I feel like there's no reason to live and work to keep myself fed and continue that routine tell i die... Ill never be remeber, and frankly i feel more crazy sober then i do when I'm high...
I think you need to find something you love to do, to bring back that special sparkle you speak of.
I'm sorry to hear I'm not the only one..
Good luck my brethren
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**need a check up?** **im a Doctor**
         i sometimes wish I was a wormy, wiggling all in the cold dirt...tickle tackle pickle dickle think a mackshift thought of broken words broken gears and words of conundrums..I'm not a weiner doctor so take that shit to dr. Gonz free boob inplant consultations.. Photo required
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Agentchewy
Pantheism.


Registered: 12/12/12
Posts: 3,960
Loc: vietnam
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Dr.Dankhead]
#18779563 - 08/30/13 10:29 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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--------------------
If I knew the way, I would take you home.
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JohnTayler320
Stranger

Registered: 07/27/13
Posts: 65
Last seen: 9 years, 10 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Agentchewy]
#18780680 - 08/31/13 09:16 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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That's awesome
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Jesus Cristo
High on Drugs



Registered: 07/25/11
Posts: 739
Last seen: 10 years, 1 month
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: JohnTayler320]
#18780740 - 08/31/13 09:46 AM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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It's not HPPD if I get visuals and trippy thoughts only when smoking, right? Can smoking really good weed cause this too?
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HostDisorder
Stranger


Registered: 07/27/12
Posts: 529
Loc: United Kingdom
Last seen: 7 years, 6 months
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Re: Now, 24/7, even when I'm sober, [Re: Jesus Cristo]
#18781453 - 08/31/13 01:56 PM (10 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jesus Cristo said: It's not HPPD if I get visuals and trippy thoughts only when smoking, right? Can smoking really good weed cause this too?
Considering cannabis is a psychdelic, yeah.
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