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Anonymous #1

Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? * 1
    #18762464 - 08/27/13 03:23 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

I ask the question partly regarding romantic relationships, but also in general. I'm still young(mid twenties) but I'm constantly regretting choices I made when I was younger. Part of it is because there's a girl I still love from my past that I had a relationship with that never got a fair chance because we were young and immature and life seems to take people in different directions. I have a girlfriend I've been with since high school who I love but to be honest I always still wonder what it would have been like with the other person. I know that sounds bad but my girlfriends aware of this and the relationship was open in regards to this person anyways.

Aside from just relationships though I am nothing like what I wanted to be when I was younger. I've done many things that are against standards I originally had for myself.

I really just want to get the thoughts out of my head constantly making me think about how different my life could be if I could just change a couple things from my past. Certain thoughts like that have followed me for years now and I'm starting to think that can't be normal because I feel like it's making me lose my mind. If anyone went through this same shit who's older and wiser then me it'd be encouraging to hear it but from what I've seen it seems like everyone's miserable.


Edited by Anonymous (08/27/13 03:24 AM)


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Anonymous #1

Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18762473 - 08/27/13 03:30 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

If that's to long to read what I'd really like to hear is how do you get past thinking about what life would be like if you had done something different? The smallest actions can have long lasting consequences.


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OfflineAce1928
Experimenter
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Registered: 08/09/13
Posts: 181
Loc: NSW
Last seen: 5 years, 1 month
Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18762578 - 08/27/13 05:16 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Mate. I go through this daily as well. I dont know if its "normal" or not. But its difficult thats for sure.
So many tiny tiny actions could change so much... would it be better? or would you still feel the same?

You can never know... I like to think that no ones life turns out as they wanted
What did you want to be when you were a child?
Where are you now?
What changed?

Life is a difficult struggle but one hell of a ride


--------------------
Only by embracing that which mother nature has supplied to us can we hope to ever peacefully exist on this planet


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Offlinellama_police
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Registered: 02/20/13
Posts: 516
Loc: Australia
Last seen: 7 years, 11 months
Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: Ace1928]
    #18762651 - 08/27/13 06:09 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Regretting something means you haven't learned from it. Take your experiences and grow from them, ensuring to not repeat "mistakes". No point dwelling on the past and wallowing. Use it to have a clearer path to your future.

As if anyone's supposed to know where their life will end up anyway...


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Anonymous #2

Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: llama_police]
    #18762664 - 08/27/13 06:25 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Romantically, yeah, I was lucky enough to find my soulmate in junior high, but my career isn't going as I imagined.

I don't know what I want to do with my life.


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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18762744 - 08/27/13 07:17 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

I feel you OP, last year I had a lot of regrets. Skipped town and left everything behind to get away from them, lost friends and money. Uh, anyways after spending some time alone working on my trade it all started piecing itself together again.

Definitely happy with this little corner, going over the list I've got a good family, decent health, a trade and art to channel through, pot, mushrooms, and a duffel bag full of laundry. Couldn't be happier


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InvisibleSARAtonin
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Registered: 09/28/11
Posts: 15,907
Loc: Deutschland
Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: Repertoire89]
    #18763137 - 08/27/13 09:59 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

In regards to my relationships, I could never be happier.
I am in a very loving relationship with my amazing girlfriend Lilith.
Sure, along the way I went through a lot of shit and confusion,
but I'm glad all of that is behind me and I now I understand what I want in a relationship;
another woman.

Granted I am still very young,20, so what I have now with Lily may pass,
but I will always have the memories of the fun times I have with her, and the door she opened up for me.

As far as my life in general I guess I wish my parents got along better with me,
but they are fine, they give me money all the time to live on my own so that's nice. :thumbsup:
I don't have a job by my own choosing because financially I have no need for one.
I have the most amazing person as a room mate, whom I love very much, Elizabeth.

Over all I love my life, it's turning out quite nicely, and I can't wait to see were it takes me. :bliss:


--------------------
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InvisibleLynnch
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Posts: 7,855
Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: SARAtonin]
    #18763547 - 08/27/13 11:49 AM (10 years, 5 months ago)

You're in your mid 20's, not your 60's. You've got a lot of life to live, and a lot of lessons to learn. Wondering what if gets you nowhere. Have you ever considered that you obsess so much about this person because at this point they've become a perfect fantasy to you? That the story you've created in your head is what you want? Sure, small events have big consequences, but you have no way of knowing for sure how it would/will all turn out. Who knows, things could have gone better with the first girl, yet you still end up with the girl you're with now. Point is, it doesn't matter.

What you are experiencing is commonly known as life. You will make mistakes. You will have regrets. You will get on with your life and find happiness in the here and now, not in your mistakes and regrets.

You can't change the past. You could always, you know, do something about the way you feel, try to contact that girl...


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Offlineclaraclairvoyant
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Posts: 7,802
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Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18765302 - 08/27/13 06:43 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

no


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InvisibleCyclohexylamine
Turn on, Tune in, Drop out
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Registered: 09/08/10
Posts: 14,327
Re: Did anyones life turn out like they wanted? [Re: Lynnch]
    #18766062 - 08/27/13 09:29 PM (10 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Lynnch said:
You're in your mid 20's, not your 60's. You've got a lot of life to live, and a lot of lessons to learn. Wondering what if gets you nowhere. Have you ever considered that you obsess so much about this person because at this point they've become a perfect fantasy to you? That the story you've created in your head is what you want? Sure, small events have big consequences, but you have no way of knowing for sure how it would/will all turn out. Who knows, things could have gone better with the first girl, yet you still end up with the girl you're with now. Point is, it doesn't matter.

What you are experiencing is commonly known as life. You will make mistakes. You will have regrets. You will get on with your life and find happiness in the here and now, not in your mistakes and regrets.

You can't change the past.



:thumbup:

Also, learn from the past and make it form you into the person you want to be.


--------------------
Yes this is tymo - I just changed my name

Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to awake from that dream? How would you know the difference between that dream world and the real world?


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