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Rustifer
prestige worldwide



Registered: 04/10/05
Posts: 7,071
Loc: Central Texas
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I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. 5
#18738977 - 08/21/13 06:16 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Hi guys, it's been a while.
I just got diagnosed with Porphyria a few hours ago, it's what drove King George III mad.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Porphyria
I've been in the hospital for 4 days now, getting massive amounts of morphine sulfate every 3 hours for my pain. The attack has finally stopped and I can function again. It's like I'm coming out of a 9 day long bad trip, I didn't sleep for over 72 hours and when I came into the hospital I was dry heaving constantly and shitting in my pants while in complete psychosis. It has been a very humbling experience to say the least.
The doctor says that I will need to keep a supply of morphine sulfate on hand for the attacks, and be on a low dose of long half-life opiates for the rest of my life.
I've been struggling with this disease and opiate addiction partially due to this for 10 years now. It is a bitter sweet ending to my suffering. I have put so much work into trying to be opiate free, and endured a PTSD-producing amount of pain thinking I was just being a pussy about withdrawing. It is a very comforting feeling to know that I will never be treated like a dope-sick junkie again in the ER when I'm in excruciating pain. As a opiate addict, it would seem that having your doctor tell you that you're going to have to take them for the rest of you life would be a dream come true... But honestly, after all the work I've put into trying to be clean from them, it produces a wide array of emotions inside of me knowing that I will never be able to be truly sober again without being in excruciating pain.
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer] 5
#18738993 - 08/21/13 06:18 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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im sorry to hear that brother
best of luck on your lifes journey i wish good things to happen to you
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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Hellogoodbyedeath

Registered: 03/24/12
Posts: 2,904
Loc:
Last seen: 2 years, 17 days
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer]
#18739047 - 08/21/13 06:30 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I'll keep you in my thoughts, friend. 
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dontknow
It's all in the reflex


Registered: 07/05/13
Posts: 3,889
Last seen: 7 years, 3 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Hellogoodbyedeath]
#18739077 - 08/21/13 06:39 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I hope you find some peace for your emotions
--------------------
The discerning heart seeks knowledge, but the mouth of a fool feeds on folly. -Proverbs 15:14
“Imagination is everything. It is the preview of Life’s coming attractions.” Albert Einstein
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lazyfingers
grrr


Registered: 08/07/09
Posts: 3,347
Last seen: 4 years, 21 hours
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: dontknow] 1
#18739094 - 08/21/13 06:45 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Don't worry about addiction op. We're all addicted to something, just roll with the punches the best you can.
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crimsonking91
Stranger

Registered: 02/19/13
Posts: 188
Last seen: 10 years, 1 month
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: dontknow]
#18739095 - 08/21/13 06:46 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Yea I'm on suboxone and wish I had opiates that were shorter acting, but I feel like opiates kill the serotonin feeling for me "not sure how to describe that" but its why things get psychedelic like while withdrawing and can be slightly pleasurable in the early early withdrawing phase. But I can understand never being clean from opiates would be depressing.
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xbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: crimsonking91]
#18739184 - 08/21/13 07:10 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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That really sucks though, sorry man. Dont know what else to say because that situation just sucks. I would love a lifetime supply of opiates but not at the expense of a illness.
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Enjoywho
Rags to Bitches



Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: xbloodwhipx]
#18739217 - 08/21/13 07:17 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Nice! Lucky asshole!
-------------------- "I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." "In the days of kings and queens I was a jester." "And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies "Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"
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ManianFH
living in perverty


Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,741
Last seen: 52 minutes, 26 seconds
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer]
#18739236 - 08/21/13 07:22 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I wish you the best with your management of this condition. Sounds like a rough one. Crazy how the body can just fall apart in a matter of moments, I speak from personal experience as well.
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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lessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer]
#18739250 - 08/21/13 07:24 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rustifer said: Hi guys, it's been a while.
I just got diagnosed with Porphyria a few hours ago, it's what drove King George III mad.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Porphyria
I've been in the hospital for 4 days now, getting massive amounts of morphine sulfate every 3 hours for my pain. The attack has finally stopped and I can function again. It's like I'm coming out of a 9 day long bad trip, I didn't sleep for over 72 hours and when I came into the hospital I was dry heaving constantly and shitting in my pants while in complete psychosis. It has been a very humbling experience to say the least.
The doctor says that I will need to keep a supply of morphine sulfate on hand for the attacks, and be on a low dose of long half-life opiates for the rest of my life.
I've been struggling with this disease and opiate addiction partially due to this for 10 years now. It is a bitter sweet ending to my suffering. I have put so much work into trying to be opiate free, and endured a PTSD-producing amount of pain thinking I was just being a pussy about withdrawing. It is a very comforting feeling to know that I will never be treated like a dope-sick junkie again in the ER when I'm in excruciating pain. As a opiate addict, it would seem that having your doctor tell you that you're going to have to take them for the rest of you life would be a dream come true... But honestly, after all the work I've put into trying to be clean from them, it produces a wide array of emotions inside of me knowing that I will never be able to be truly sober again without being in excruciating pain.
Feel your pain, had kidney stones for so long I can't even remember it now
They keep coming.. pain is so bad I can't even lay or walk due to it when it is worse and they affect the whole body, itching, swelling, very dizzy, can't pee, almost like fainting when I drink water, can't speak/understand people after I drink water/walk often etc.
Worst pain in my life, only morphine can fix it, but had no morphine for years...
Nature,houseplants,pets,gardening keeps my mood up though
My best wishes peace
btw... I got treated like a junkie in the ER too many times... seems we share that, even though I could only lay down on my stomach due to the pain docs sent me home without pain pills many times, sometimes with them
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xbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Enjoywho]
#18739258 - 08/21/13 07:26 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Enjoywho said: Nice! Lucky asshole!
Meh not really dude, opiates are easy to get off the street it would suck to HAVE to take them because of a illness.
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hidenseek1
Its got all the dinks.
Registered: 12/22/12
Posts: 5,423
Loc: poop
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Enjoywho]
#18739267 - 08/21/13 07:27 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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shit i didnt realize that was a disease
i thought it was a pop-punk song
-------------------- You can drink at 7 A.M., because the Beastie Boys fought for that right -------------------------------------------------------------------------- pons asinorum -------------------------------------------------------------------------- lsd and the vietnam war changed music forever
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Enjoywho
Rags to Bitches



Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: xbloodwhipx]
#18739271 - 08/21/13 07:28 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
xbloodwhipx said:
Quote:
Enjoywho said: Nice! Lucky asshole!
Meh not really dude, opiates are easy to get off the street it would suck to HAVE to take them because of a illness.
I know man that was my instant reaction from the title. Im sorry op wish there was somethin I could do my friend =(
-------------------- "I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." "In the days of kings and queens I was a jester." "And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies "Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"
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VivaLaMushie
RIP LS :(



Registered: 07/23/12
Posts: 15,711
Loc: Switzerland
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer]
#18739284 - 08/21/13 07:30 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Sending good vibes your way. Does marijuana help at all?
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!



Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer]
#18739285 - 08/21/13 07:31 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rustifer said: Hi guys, it's been a while.
I just got diagnosed with Porphyria a few hours ago, it's what drove King George III mad.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Porphyria
I've been in the hospital for 4 days now, getting massive amounts of morphine sulfate every 3 hours for my pain. The attack has finally stopped and I can function again. It's like I'm coming out of a 9 day long bad trip, I didn't sleep for over 72 hours and when I came into the hospital I was dry heaving constantly and shitting in my pants while in complete psychosis. It has been a very humbling experience to say the least.
The doctor says that I will need to keep a supply of morphine sulfate on hand for the attacks, and be on a low dose of long half-life opiates for the rest of my life.
I've been struggling with this disease and opiate addiction partially due to this for 10 years now. It is a bitter sweet ending to my suffering. I have put so much work into trying to be opiate free, and endured a PTSD-producing amount of pain thinking I was just being a pussy about withdrawing. It is a very comforting feeling to know that I will never be treated like a dope-sick junkie again in the ER when I'm in excruciating pain. As a opiate addict, it would seem that having your doctor tell you that you're going to have to take them for the rest of you life would be a dream come true... But honestly, after all the work I've put into trying to be clean from them, it produces a wide array of emotions inside of me knowing that I will never be able to be truly sober again without being in excruciating pain.
I would say that sounds like a mixed blessing, but not really. I'm sorry to hear about your condition, it sounds horrible. I'm glad you at least have recourse to medications and a diagnosis and I hope it's smoother sailing in the future.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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birdland

Registered: 07/24/11
Posts: 2,202
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer]
#18739610 - 08/21/13 08:32 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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This is sad to hear, I wish you the best man.
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Rustifer
prestige worldwide



Registered: 04/10/05
Posts: 7,071
Loc: Central Texas
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Enjoywho]
#18740106 - 08/21/13 10:13 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Thanks for all the good vibes and well wishes! I just spent a few hours with my lady friend and got my dose of that good good. My nurse is a pretty cool cat about a year younger than I, he got a kick when I pressed the space bar on my laptop as he pushed the plunger full of 8mg morphine sulfate to A Shot In The Arm from Wilco.
Quote:
VivaLaMushie said: Sending good vibes your way. Does marijuana help at all?
Yeah, it takes the down just a notch below wanting to off myself level. Helps with the dry heaving too.
Quote:
Enjoywho said:
Quote:
xbloodwhipx said:
Quote:
Enjoywho said: Nice! Lucky asshole!
Meh not really dude, opiates are easy to get off the street it would suck to HAVE to take them because of a illness.
I know man that was my instant reaction from the title. Im sorry op wish there was something I could do my friend =(
My instant reaction was the same, and the inner junkie is giddy as hell. But logic keeps me from being completely happy about this. I was sober, (sober sober, not west side sober) for a number of months late 2012 to early 2013. I loved having my drive back, that feeling of being myself again. But the pain lead me to 'relapse' and here we are.
I function better opiated anyways. I was on suboxone all of 2011, and it was the best year of my life. Had a job, got promoted, was out rock climbing multiple times a week, had a girl, an apartment, etc etc.
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indica


Registered: 08/17/05
Posts: 18,905
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer] 1
#18740168 - 08/21/13 10:32 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I personally blame the homosexuals and anti-gun groups for ruining our freedoms with marijauana
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Doctor Sponge
He's off on a tangent



Registered: 05/03/12
Posts: 11,795
Loc: the desert
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: indica]
#18740198 - 08/21/13 10:42 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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lucky ass OP opiates yum
--------------------
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ComputerTekGuy
Teh Awesome



Registered: 01/15/07
Posts: 1,150
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Doctor Sponge]
#18740208 - 08/21/13 10:46 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Start a foundation, raise awareness.
Don't know what else to say, but hope you do well.
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Enjoywho
Rags to Bitches



Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: ComputerTekGuy]
#18740284 - 08/21/13 11:14 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Shit I just read ops post. Im sorry man =( I spoke too soon I wish you nothing but the best =(
-------------------- "I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." "In the days of kings and queens I was a jester." "And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies "Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"
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passifloracaerulea



Registered: 11/13/10
Posts: 10,485
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: ComputerTekGuy]
#18740289 - 08/21/13 11:15 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I used to have a chinchilla named porphyria.
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Rustifer
prestige worldwide



Registered: 04/10/05
Posts: 7,071
Loc: Central Texas
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: passifloracaerulea]
#18740402 - 08/21/13 11:56 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Led Zeppelin
Tripper


Registered: 05/17/10
Posts: 3,962
Last seen: 3 years, 4 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: passifloracaerulea]
#18740424 - 08/22/13 12:01 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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well atleast if your gonna be on them forever and dont have to withdrawal the only thing you gotta worry about is constipation and being a winy prick
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Rustifer
prestige worldwide



Registered: 04/10/05
Posts: 7,071
Loc: Central Texas
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Led Zeppelin] 2
#18740445 - 08/22/13 12:06 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Led Zeppelin said: well atleast if your gonna be on them forever and dont have to withdrawal the only thing you gotta worry about is constipation and being a winy prick
A winy prick?
If you tried to take one step in my shoes, you'd fall and bust your ass kid.
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Led Zeppelin
Tripper


Registered: 05/17/10
Posts: 3,962
Last seen: 3 years, 4 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Rustifer]
#18740535 - 08/22/13 12:40 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rustifer said:
Quote:
Led Zeppelin said: well atleast if your gonna be on them forever and dont have to withdrawal the only thing you gotta worry about is constipation and being a winy prick
A winy prick?
If you tried to take one step in my shoes, you'd fall and bust your ass kid.
internet serious business?
that wasnt meant to be a personal attack what I was referring to was the effect opiates has on people that makes them irritable and complain about everything. that wasn't meant to be an attack on you. I guess I should have been more clear
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Distorted Vision
The best. Of the worst.



Registered: 07/30/09
Posts: 4,292
Loc: Indiana
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Led Zeppelin]
#18740784 - 08/22/13 03:05 AM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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I'm so sorry bro, opiates get rid of emotions too. They make you empty inside, and it sucks you have to take them. Try to not take them when you can, your body and soul will thank you. Goodluck my friend.
--------------------
"Yo yo just here to spread my clit and show ya'll what a wonderful and free being we are all inside lets take the acid and turn inside into the outside come on over baby lets smell the roses ohh ohh come on we're about to get lit show my undies to your baby I'll hug it down three times go around frown come on we aint a nice clown kiss me upside down down down come on sorry if you cant handle my wokeness come on lets take her panties off write shroomery on my asshole and taste it lick it make if feel like we was 1978 come on baby lets do the locamotion"-Twig dude
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Led Zeppelin
Tripper


Registered: 05/17/10
Posts: 3,962
Last seen: 3 years, 4 months
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Distorted Vision]
#18744716 - 08/22/13 10:21 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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and about being treated like a junkie at the ER. it seems like the majority of them treat you like shit and then theres always that one doctor or nurse that understands lol
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passifloracaerulea



Registered: 11/13/10
Posts: 10,485
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Re: I just found out I will have to be opiated for the remainder of my life. [Re: Led Zeppelin]
#18744800 - 08/22/13 10:40 PM (10 years, 5 months ago) |
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they'll only shoot you up with morphine or dilaudid if you allow them to put you through a ct scan and see a stone stuck in your ureter. i fractured my t5 and t6 vertebrae and they only would give me 5mg of Norco in the hospital. they had me on tramadol and even 400 mg doesn't do shit for me. I've pretty much given up on doctors. the funny thing is, i read about hepatic porphyria and it seems it could be my answer as well i have these strange hospitalizing attacks from bowels to seizures to vertigo, to psychotic nervous breakdowns, to allergic reactions... they put names on all of these things but never have given me any reasons. i guess the next attack i have i need to request tests for it. it's also true that the only thing that has ever come close to doing anything to help me have been the opiates, and they cure any one of those problems immediately. it's hard to explain that to doctors though when you're screaming in pain and they tell you there are no nerve endings in the stomach or intestines. some of these doctors should be shot. i also played with lead, mercury, battery innards and all kinds of bad shit when i was a kid in the 80's.
Edited by passifloracaerulea (08/22/13 10:45 PM)
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