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InvisibleMacavity224
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Registered: 06/09/11
Posts: 719
I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine...
    #18738604 - 08/21/13 04:55 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

I may have to take a drug test for a potential job (haven't even gone on the interview yet, but I'm just trying to think ahead), and I'm kind of nervous about using synthetic urine.

I haven't gone for a test in a couple years now, but from what I remember, they pat you down pretty thoroughly and stand guard right outside. I've read that the best place to keep a fake bottle would be under your scrotum, but it's still possible that they'd find it there, isn't it? Also, if the person administering the test did hypothetically find a bottle of synthetic urine, what would the consequences be? Would they tell you to just fuck off, or would there actually be legal repercussions for trying to cheat a test?

Thanks :laugh:


--------------------
"O my soul, I taught you to say "Today" as well as "Once" and "Formerly," and to dance your dance over every here and there and yonder."


:trippnballs:


Everything I post here is not true. Do not believe a single word of it.


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OfflineAgentchewy
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: Macavity224]
    #18738624 - 08/21/13 04:59 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Pre mix it and put it in a condom in a secret pocket in your underwear, walk cautiously, it'll stay warm


--------------------


If I knew the way, I would take you home.


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OfflineSeriously_trippin
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: Macavity224]
    #18738690 - 08/21/13 05:08 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Do you have a friend or girlfriend or something that has clean piss you can use?


--------------------
R.I.P
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Modest Mouse
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Slothie
That Kid With The face
ShLong
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Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many :heart:


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InvisibleMacavity224
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: Seriously_trippin]
    #18738713 - 08/21/13 05:13 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Yes.


--------------------
"O my soul, I taught you to say "Today" as well as "Once" and "Formerly," and to dance your dance over every here and there and yonder."


:trippnballs:


Everything I post here is not true. Do not believe a single word of it.


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OfflineCoreyRubble
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: Agentchewy]
    #18738740 - 08/21/13 05:18 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

I have no clue about the legal consequences if caught, but I have used synthetic urine for employment UA's more than ten times. I throw the bottle on the defrost with the heat blasted on the way there.... watching it until it hits the top. I take it off and wrap it to my leg with one of those bandage wraps, you wrap it as high as you can right next to your scrotum. When I sit down, it is just below where my legs touch.

  They don't check your crotch, they always ask me to empty my pockets and just pat around(never the crotch though). I pull it out and it is always 96 degrees. I don't like the hand warmers because they heat it up over 100 degrees and are hard to keep a good temp. I empty the bottle and put it back in the wrap, just in case.


  The problem I have ran into recently is they try to ask for a lot of urine at some places. I bought the bigger bottle of quick fix (3oz) and it was barely enough, the normal is 2 oz I believe. I have only ran into that problem in Birmingham. When the 2 oz wasn't enough I just said I couldn't pee anymore and they let it slide.


  It works trust me, as long as you have an up to date bottle. Just keep it as high as you can on your leg and watch the temp, no worries besides those.


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OfflineCoreyRubble
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: CoreyRubble]
    #18738750 - 08/21/13 05:20 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Go fake pee, I also keep a bottle on hand in case I get a random UA.


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OfflineSeriously_trippin
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: Macavity224]
    #18738769 - 08/21/13 05:25 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Macavity224 said:
Yes.



That's how my bestfriend got and kept his job at walmart he used his girls piss,it was cheaper and more authentic then fake piss


--------------------
R.I.P
Zombi3, Blue Helix
Modest Mouse
Zappa
Slothie
That Kid With The face
ShLong
Le Canard
split_by_nine
& Big Worm Forever
Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many :heart:


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OfflineCoreyRubble
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: Seriously_trippin]
    #18738879 - 08/21/13 05:53 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

I had a guy in one of my diversion classes that used his sisters pee.

It worked good until the counselor found out that he was pregnant, and that is how she found out.

:ilold:


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Offlinegeckomage
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: Macavity224]
    #18739299 - 08/21/13 07:32 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

don't do it! they can test for it now. Just quit smoking for a few weeks. in the very least drink a bunch of cranberry juice and orange juice for some color and acidity and density. then drink some water. so it looks like normal pee but is in reality diluted. if it's just for a job and it's diluted you could always be like oh, i didn't know how much water i was spose to drink. please let me do another one.


--------------------
‎"If the words 'life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness' don't include the right to experiment with your own consciousness, then the Declaration of Independence isn't worth the hemp it was written on." -Terence McKenna

"He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would suffice."
-Albert Einstein

"If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?"
- Scott Adams


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Offlinegeckomage
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Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: CoreyRubble]
    #18739314 - 08/21/13 07:35 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

that's pretty fucking funny actually. but that'd be a horrible way to find out xD did they let him off the hook for that one? if i was a cop i'd be like ya know what? you gave me such a good laugh. just go home :P.

my gf is preggers though. but crazy enough. my nearly life long friend, brother, and party buddy got his girlfriend preggers at the same time. they're both 6 weeks. but then that beggs the question in my mind. i'm going to be a dad in less than a year, should i still be getting on this website?


--------------------
‎"If the words 'life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness' don't include the right to experiment with your own consciousness, then the Declaration of Independence isn't worth the hemp it was written on." -Terence McKenna

"He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would suffice."
-Albert Einstein

"If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?"
- Scott Adams


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InvisibleMacavity224
Ubermensch
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Registered: 06/09/11
Posts: 719
Re: I'm a little hesitant about using synthetic urine... [Re: geckomage]
    #18739380 - 08/21/13 07:47 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

I don't really have a few weeks...the interview is Friday. If I do get the job (and if they even drug test, which I'm assuming they do), I would guess that they'd let me know mid-late next week. So I'm guessing I could probably procrastinate the test anywhere between 7-10 days from this Friday...for reference, the last time I smoked was yesterday (Wednesday). I feel like I'd be cutting it reaaaallllyyy close if I tried to use my own piss.

Can they really tell if it's synthetic? I've heard stories of people getting instant failure using those detox drinks or whatever, but never any stories about getting caught for fake piss.


--------------------
"O my soul, I taught you to say "Today" as well as "Once" and "Formerly," and to dance your dance over every here and there and yonder."


:trippnballs:


Everything I post here is not true. Do not believe a single word of it.


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