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OfflineOZA
When the going gets weird.....
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Registered: 03/29/12
Posts: 3,808
Last seen: 8 years, 8 months
More of a friendship thing, but...
    #18723075 - 08/18/13 02:28 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

...There was this girl I was going after. I had strong feelings for her, she did for me at first, but she rightfully said that it wouldn't work as our lives were about to be on such different paths. Ended up being friends. We've been chilling this summer, I'm leaving for school soon but she still wants to be friends.


So, half of me wants to be friends with her as I've learned quite a lot from her and she's a really cool person. We've got a lot in common and our personalities mix well.

And then the other half of me still yearns for her as more than a friend. Admittedly, it will never work out. I get that. This half tells me it's an unhealthy friendship. Even though I love being around her even if it's platonic, I still want a little more. I think to myself "maybe one day it will work", all that stuff.

I'm sure a lot of you have been in this position. Is it better to get over it and stay friends, or just leave it all behind? I feel like this should be WAY easier to figure out than it is, so I turn to the almighty shroomery.

Thanks


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The happiness consists in realizing that it is all a great strange dream.


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InvisibleLynnch
Strangerer
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Registered: 04/29/09
Posts: 7,886
Re: More of a friendship thing, but... [Re: OZA]
    #18723106 - 08/18/13 02:34 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

It is totally possible to get over it and remain friends. How long it takes and how painful it is for you is up to you... Are you still going to be her friend when she wants you to hang out with her and her boyfriend?


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OfflineOZA
When the going gets weird.....
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Registered: 03/29/12
Posts: 3,808
Last seen: 8 years, 8 months
Re: More of a friendship thing, but... [Re: Lynnch]
    #18723131 - 08/18/13 02:38 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Lynnch said:
Are you still going to be her friend when she wants you to hang out with her and her boyfriend?



Yeah I guess so. I'd rather be friends with her than not be in her life at all, for sure. I just hope my yearnings will subside, but I guess there are quite a few girls out there


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The happiness consists in realizing that it is all a great strange dream.


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Offlinehappymealplease
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Registered: 07/14/11
Posts: 535
Last seen: 9 years, 3 months
Re: More of a friendship thing, but... [Re: OZA]
    #18723157 - 08/18/13 02:45 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

OZA said:
Is it better to get over it and stay friends, or just leave it all behind?



There's really no right answer to this.

The best I can suggest is, put it all on the line so you never have to wonder what could've been, or maintain the friendship, so you can maybe still have it in 10 years.


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Onlinekoods
Ribbit
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Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,406
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
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Re: More of a friendship thing, but... [Re: happymealplease]
    #18725984 - 08/19/13 04:44 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Straight people are so adorable, with your neat little categories. Friends. Lovers. Bitch exes.

So she is a perfect friend, except that you have maybe feel more for her than she does for you. Well, if you have to throw away every friendship where the two people have different opinions about the way they feel, then toss em all out because that's the way friendships are. And they are constantly change, too.

And she may change her mind.


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NotSheekle said
“if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”


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OfflineOZA
When the going gets weird.....
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Registered: 03/29/12
Posts: 3,808
Last seen: 8 years, 8 months
Re: More of a friendship thing, but... [Re: koods]
    #18726818 - 08/19/13 10:02 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Good point and good advice. Thanks


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The happiness consists in realizing that it is all a great strange dream.


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InvisibleThe Lizard King
Student Strawman
Male


Registered: 12/23/12
Posts: 2,429
Loc: Babylon
Re: More of a friendship thing, but... [Re: OZA]
    #18728113 - 08/19/13 03:10 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Just let things play out.

I've had a few relationships with girls that I had been friends with for more than half a year and it's all ended with us just still being decent friends.

If anything more happens, it happens. :shrug:


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Dipping Swords in Metaphors


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OfflineInfiniteToker
Devourer of Chicken Wings
Male


Registered: 06/22/13
Posts: 1,724
Loc: Earth
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
Re: More of a friendship thing, but... [Re: The Lizard King]
    #18728576 - 08/19/13 04:51 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

break it off if you must but to me it would be a douche-bag thing to do.  even if for all the right reasons such as personal growth, etc- it would still be considered weak,,feminine, etc.


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"I'm chilling in a room with a view, there's always room for improvement; so i grab my coat and go and prove it"-Method Man


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