Hi everybody.
I'm 30 years old. I did mushrooms for the very first time a few weeks ago. I took perhaps 2 grams and it was amazing. Yesterday I took a bigger dose, and I want to write down some of what I experienced before the memory is too fuzzy.
My day started by taking a engineering mathematics exam. It went well. Afterwards, I had a beer with a friend and co-student to celebrate, and relaxed. The weather was amazing, summer is about to end, and I am going to be buzy soon, so I decided to go home and prepare for a trip.
I do not own a scale. At 18:00 I made a post asking for help to decide which mushrooms to eat.
I ate one, two, three, and then I lost count. I wonder how many I ate...
I then took a shower, brushed my teeth and put on fresh clothes. I want things to be perfect.
After 30 minutes I started to feel a bit tingly in my fingers. My meager experience tells me that is the onset.
I filled a large bottle of water, my phone and ear plugs for music and went to the park and sat down. There are a lot of trees there, students running around, barbecues etc.
Like the previous time, I experienced a sense of dropping down, not quite vertigo, but a sort of brief loss of focus. Colors started becoming metallic and I started having closed eye visuals. Last time, I saw greek patterns all over the place.

This time, the sun was shining on an apartment building at the edge of the park, reflecing the light from all the windows to my eyes. When I looked at the building and then closed my eyes, the lights were still there, and then they started changing and moving. 2-dimensional polygons in constant changing patterns. I tried to focus on them, but they would change before I could get a clear view.
Now.. THIS is how I know I went significantly deeper than last time, because I started having OPEN eye visuals. The grass was covered in swirling patches, buildings bulged and became rounded, the sky was a covered in vibrant 2 dimensional geometry, like a church window.
I brought the water bottle to my mouth, and the shock of the water hitting my mouth was indescribable. I don't know what caused it, but it brought my thoughts to a halt, and while drinking I was briefly "sane". But after putting it down that changed of course.
And I could not stop talking to myself. I had epiphany after epiphany about the nature of life and about the eternity of the universe. I kept thinking mushrooms were about contact. Contact with oneself, with the universe, with others, with nature, and often people think of UFO's etc, also contact. Made sense at the time! Just talking and talking.
Then it went even deeper. I lost concept of time. I would zone out into thoughts, thoughts darting back and forth, wild thoughts and conclusions, they weren't summoned intentionally, they just sprung up, I don't know from where (my mind, obviously, but it did not seem like that). As I zoned back in I had NO idea how much time had passed, and that was very disorienting.
I had this song on a loop (terrible version on youtube, sound is poor, but whatever), like last time, because I knew beforehand that it was exclusively positive, had the necessary energy too, to keep the trip positive. The bass affected my visuals, it was mind blowing.
I was laying on the grass, and I tilted my head back so I was watching trees upside-down. That blew my mind, looking at the branches constantly splitting.
I looked sideways down a path. In reality it is only a hundred meters or so, but at that point, it looked endless, I had NO concept of how far that was, and I was staring at it for a long, long time, to come to terms with that path being endless.
I started at the grass, the birds, the buildings, and there were so many details to take in, that when I raised my eyes to look at the horizon I was shocked, imagine how much detail there is in the world, if one is to take the time to consider it all.
Wonder what would have happened if I was on such a trip in a cathedral...
After 2 hours of this, the sun was going down, and I was getting cold. Now, I was still outside, and my city is PACKED with students these days, so there I was, having a heavy trip, time was going fast, then slow, then stopping, and I had to walk back home.
I must have freaked people the FUCK out, because my pupils were so dilated nobody could tell what my eye color was. I walked fast, then stopped, perhaps that caused my time problems to increase.
Now, this sounds dramatic, but it was not at all a negative thing, it was just concerning, because I was straddling two dimensions, half my mind was in the mushroom state, and the other was desperately trying to remain inconspicuous as I lurched home.
When I got home, I looked in the mirror, and my eyes shocked me. The size of them. I did not have any bad feelings beyond that, I know mirrors can cause that, but I was fine.
So I lay down on my bed, and tried to regain focus. The trip had gone on way longer than my first time, and so much deeper. I tried taking a leak, and the walls had CRAZY dimensions, all tilted and bizarre, they made no sense to me.
I went back to my bed, and so I was still talking to myself, I turned on the TV to avoid freaking my next door flat mate out, who is not in on this at all.
The show on TV was about a chimpanzee named Nim Chimpsky (yep!), in a 1970's research experiment by hippie scientists, where they tried to rear it like a human baby to see how it would grow up. The pictures kept going from vintage 70's to modern day interviews, and that was NOT a good thing for me. I think I was coming down now, because I kept thinking thoughts about eternity and how the soul is eternal and the vastness of the universe and God etc, and then ZAP I was back in my home, and then ZAP back in the universe. Of course the monkey got ALL fucked up, it started attacking people, and I thought.. "broken animal.. that's what I am!". That was unpleasant, actually, but I made it through.
At around 22:00 I was coming down again, I was very relieved, I think 4 hours is too long for such craziness, I did not want it to continue after about 3, I was "done" by that time. I looked at my bed where I had been laying, and it was covered in grass from the park.
So... I went much deeper than last time. I gained a HUGE amount of respect for these things, my GOD what power they pack, I can't imagine what 5 grams must do to a human mind, let alone something like DMT. Wow.
I know I failed to put into words what I learned and felt, I've only tripped twice now, but I struggle with retaining anything, with bringing it back with me. And the feelings are too personal to put into words, really.
Beyond that I learned that I really don't understand how people can trip with others. I had no interest nor ability to communicate with people, and I guess this was perhaps 3.5 grams (just guessing, again: no scale).
If anybody reads this, how can you deal with other people when taking a big dose? To me, the miracle is inside my mind, no in talking to others. I dunno, I can't knock it until I try it. I hope to get that chance at some point.
In the future, when I do such a dose, I will make sure to be somewhere safe, I can't be walking home at the apex of the trip, people were terrified, I think.
So.. inescapable closed eye visuals, open eye visuals, time surging back and forth, talking to myself, zapping to and back to some other form of consciousness. It was very heavy, very unique experience, I am happy and I feel blessed to have experienced it.
And it's remarkable how much I thought about God, for an atheist 
In conclusion, it's amusing to me that I went from having a maths exam in the morning, extreme end of rational logic, to mushrooms in the evening, extreme end of chaos and exploration, then the morning after I went to a therapist, extreme end of emotions. Quite an adventurous 24 hours, I'd say!
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