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Anonymous #1

How many rejections will I have to go through
    #18711199 - 08/15/13 08:17 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Since my ex girlfriend and I broke up, I have continued to put myself out there, something that I don't normally do. There are times that I enjoy just doing the single thing and being on my own, but there are also plenty of periods where I want someone to be there with me, and to experience things with, AKA a girlfriend. I am getting tired of the rejection, though. I have a low self esteem (I am seeing a therapist and working on it, believe me), so doing shit like this is hard for me, but I make myself do it. I have talked to, or attempted to talk to, probably about 6 or 7 girls, and face constant rejection. I am getting tired of this, and it is making me feel really unwanted and it's a shitty feeling. I understand rejection is common, but 7 time sin a row of pretty firm rejection seems to be a  bit much. I'm not coming on too strong, I'm doing what I've done with all the other girls I've ended up dating in the past. I'm simply being kind and myself, but it doesn't seem to work lately. Anyone else ever experience this much rejection? What's wrong with me man?


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Invisiblepwnasaurus
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18711356 - 08/15/13 08:42 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Seven really is not that much.  I don't know what context you're approaching these women in, but if you hardly know them, or you just met them at a party or something, it's not surprising.

I have dated four girls, however I have had pretty much zero luck picking up girls in between.  I've had sex with 6 girls total, so that's only 2 outside of relationships.

Nothing wrong with you, you just have to keep at it!


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OfflineLarrythescaryrex
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Registered: 07/19/00
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #18713195 - 08/16/13 05:30 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

probably a metric shit ton. but one only really need to not be rejected once. so the odds are in your favor...


--------------------
RIP Acidic_Sloth

Sunset_Mission said:
"larry the scary rex
verily scary when thoroughly vexed
invoke the shadows and dust, cast a hex
mercifully massacring memories masterfully
relocate from Ur to 8th density and become a cosmic bully
mulder and scully couldn't decipher his glyphs
invoke the shadows and dust, smoke infernal spliffs"
April 24th 2011


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InvisibleDr. Crapsghetti
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18714069 - 08/16/13 10:59 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Dude, quit crying. There is more to life. I've been catfished and blackmailed looking for love over the internet. Once a chick called the cops on me because I brought her lunch at work. I've had the worst experiences with women. Worse than anyone I know and I'm still a virgin. No one gives me a chance. There is more to life though. Girls and guys, people in general, I'll never understand. Why do you need a girlfriend anyway? I've never had one. Why even bother? It never works out. Most girls seem used up and callused. I don't know the reason for that. I've been mistreated plenty of times and I'm still not heavy hearted. Idk, who cares. It's just a girl. What is a girl? I don't know. I hate all people. I love all people. It's true. Everyone sucks. That means I do too.


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Edited by Dr. Crapsghetti (08/16/13 11:18 AM)


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InvisibleLynnch
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Registered: 04/29/09
Posts: 7,886
Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Dr. Crapsghetti]
    #18714260 - 08/16/13 11:57 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

What do you mean by rejection? They won't even talk to you? Or they decline going on a date with you?
Hey man, getting up and going for 7 chicks is better than most guys do. I think you're on the right path, you're trying, and not just moping. Maybe you need to change you approach? Try a different setting? Or maybe you should give it a rest for a minute, focus on you, and let her come to you... In any case, don't worry, there's nothing wrong with you. You just haven't found the right one yet.


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Offlinei like cow poo
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18714959 - 08/16/13 02:32 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

How are your flirting skills?
How do you dress?
Do you make sure your breath doesn't smell bad?
What kind of personality do you have and what kind of girls are you going for?


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InvisibleDawks
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Registered: 06/09/10
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #18716986 - 08/16/13 11:25 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Since my ex girlfriend and I broke up, I have continued to put myself out there, something that I don't normally do. There are times that I enjoy just doing the single thing and being on my own, but there are also plenty of periods where I want someone to be there with me, and to experience things with, AKA a girlfriend. I am getting tired of the rejection, though. I have a low self esteem (I am seeing a therapist and working on it, believe me), so doing shit like this is hard for me, but I make myself do it. I have talked to, or attempted to talk to, probably about 6 or 7 girls, and face constant rejection. I am getting tired of this, and it is making me feel really unwanted and it's a shitty feeling. I understand rejection is common, but 7 time sin a row of pretty firm rejection seems to be a  bit much. I'm not coming on too strong, I'm doing what I've done with all the other girls I've ended up dating in the past. I'm simply being kind and myself, but it doesn't seem to work lately. Anyone else ever experience this much rejection? What's wrong with me man?




Everybody has different ratios because of factors such as:
>charm
>looks
>height
>wealth
>etc

However personally I find:

Roughly 1 in 15 approaches leads to a positive result (dating, casual sex, etc). and maybe 1 in 5 positive results leads to relationship material (girlfriend)

Don't take rejection personally. Honestly some women are taken, others just aren't looking for what you have to offer. You have to keep playing the field until you find your match. As a man you're lucky, you can go on the hunt so to speak and find what you're after. Women have to "wait for the right guy to come along" and often this can take a lifetime.

Also consider how many girls you "reject" without even realizing it. It's rare for a woman to approach a guy. Most doll themselves up and hope to be approached. Just walking through a shopping mall I bet there are a least a couple of girls who feel disappointed that you didn't say hi to them and for them this is rejection. In a way you reject every fat, acne ridden girl who you don't bother to approach. So don't get mad when someone doesn't feel that you're right for them.


--------------------
date ; unzip ; strip ; touch ; grep ; finger ; mount ; fsck ; more ; yes ; umount ; sleep


Edited by Dawks (08/16/13 11:45 PM)


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InvisibleSham87
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Registered: 05/16/11
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Dawks]
    #18717030 - 08/16/13 11:34 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Fuck dawks I love your wisdom man.


--------------------
:mushroom2::sun::crazy2::leaf:




...once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest places if you look at it right...



:feelsgoatman:


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InvisibleDawks
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Sham87]
    #18717049 - 08/16/13 11:38 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

:slowreaction:


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date ; unzip ; strip ; touch ; grep ; finger ; mount ; fsck ; more ; yes ; umount ; sleep


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InvisibleSham87
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Dawks]
    #18717074 - 08/16/13 11:43 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

True man.
To stay on topic I've been having the same luck as OP. The only advice I can give is to keep at it, from ex to next as Gangstarr would phrase it.


--------------------
:mushroom2::sun::crazy2::leaf:




...once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest places if you look at it right...



:feelsgoatman:


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OfflineManianFHS
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: pwnasaurus]
    #18718804 - 08/17/13 12:57 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

yeah i remember reading about this mathematician who was going through the same shit, then he just figured it out that if he continuously hit on woman after woman, eventually the variance would swing back to normal ranges. So he did just that, and got rejected a bunch of times, but I guess it built up his confidence or something cause he stopped caring about getting rejected, then out of nowhere he starting hooking up with everyone.

so if youre looking for a mathematical answer, thats what i got for you. hit on girl after girl, eventually youll get a green light.


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18719370 - 08/17/13 03:34 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Where I come from we call it playing the odds, 7 rejections sounds like one bad night :shrug:


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Offlinerobbyberto
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Repertoire89]
    #18719584 - 08/17/13 04:35 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Repertoire89 said:
Where I come from we call it playing the odds, 7 rejections sounds like one bad night :shrug:




Yeah thats just a few hours there. OP needs to stop being a wuss.


--------------------
“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington



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OfflineRewindicus
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: robbyberto]
    #18720727 - 08/17/13 09:50 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

yah 7 rejections is nothin. get used to it.

300.....now thats a different story. build of those rejection calluses it will get easier with time. And with it being easier comes more confidence and girls see that. keep it up man!


--------------------
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”- Dr. Seuss

"Too much of a good thing, can be wonderful!" - Mae West

"If you have nothing nice to say about anyone, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth





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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Rewindicus]
    #18720974 - 08/17/13 10:42 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Rewindicus said:

300.....now thats a different story.




Yeah if you pass the 300 in a row mark, time to give up


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InvisibleBodhi of Ankou
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Repertoire89]
    #18721035 - 08/17/13 10:54 PM (10 years, 6 months ago)

This thread :bathtub40lol:


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Offlineilln3ss
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: Bodhi of Ankou]
    #18721864 - 08/18/13 06:58 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

I thought you said injections... LMAO


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OfflineMoxyOx
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: illn3ss]
    #18721902 - 08/18/13 07:24 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Do you guys go up to random chicks and just ask them to go out?

I rarely have gotten rejected because after a certain amount of time I can tell if a chick is into me. Some girls just like to be obtuse and random since their personalities and minds are flat as a fuckin highland, but I can figure that out too after a while, rejection biding or not.


--------------------
No one behind, no one ahead.
The path the ancients cleared has closed.
And the other path, everyone's path,
easy and wide, goes nowhere.
I am alone and find my way.


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InvisibleBodhi of Ankou
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: MoxyOx]
    #18721910 - 08/18/13 07:31 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Seems like it. I think too many of them get caught up into " I gotta spit game" mentality, you're talking to another human being. Build up a relationship like you would with any other person. IF they get flirty then spit your game. Otherwise shut your shit up and have a regular conversation.


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InvisibleDawks
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Re: How many rejections will I have to go through [Re: MoxyOx]
    #18721969 - 08/18/13 08:13 AM (10 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

MoxyOx said:
Do you guys go up to random chicks and just ask them to go out?





You could do that but you'll get poor results. Even if you're 10/10 sexy mofo, she'll still question your motives, why is this stranger wanting to go out? is he dangerous? a serial killer?

I mean say some guy comes up to you and say "hey dude you wanna hang out and smoke some herb" the first thing you'll wonder is "why? is this guy a cop?" and probably turn him down. However if some guy came up to you, started a chat, got to know you a bit and then after chilling for a while said "hey man,wanna chill again later, smoke some weed" you'd probably say yes.

It's the same principal with the ladies. If she's attracted to you and trusts you she'll want to see you again man.


--------------------
date ; unzip ; strip ; touch ; grep ; finger ; mount ; fsck ; more ; yes ; umount ; sleep


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