cherry_darling said:

Ha, I've always been a team player   I think someone liking you enough to want to literally eat your shit can't be considered anything but the ultimate flattery!

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  Eating your shit doesn't mean he likes you.  It just means he found somebody to let him, which, if you think about it, probably isn't that easy to do.

The5thElement said:

waiting for the gorilla report 

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Man, you guys have gotta give me at least a week to complete this. I've got work and shit, and I'm supposed to see at least 2 more guys this weekend. It's tough work juggling guys you know, I've got a schedule and shit!

Don't worry though, I'm making the gorilla my top priority.

So far, we've been instant messaging it up on Facebook and flirting a lot. He mentions that he's really excited to see me, so I know it's going to happen.

And when I DO go fuck him, I'mma be like ".......sooooo hook it up with summa that human growth hormone."

cherry_darling said:

Hehe, that guy looks scary huge!  I'd be fuckin' terrified.  There's a lot to be said for terrifying sex, the adrenaline makes you feel really alive   You still hanging with those other 2 dudes from the threesome thread?  I know your schedule is full lol!

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No, the guys I'm seeing this weekend are different. Tonight I'm seeing a tattooed Jewish drug kingpin who sells acres of weed to the dispensaries around here. The other is a tall, good, wholesome Christian boy I just went out on a first date with last weekend. We're going to watch the UFC fight together this Saturday.

But yes, now that you mention it, I am supposed to meet my personal trainer later today (for training not for sex lol), and I will have to blow off his best friend this weekend because my schedule is too full lol. I was trying to orchestrate an orgy with them and my swinger couple friends, but you know how it goes, that shit takes an intense amount of coordination to follow through with, which I just don't have the patience for ATM.

Believe it or not... the Christian boy is my favorite so far out of all 4 of them. Don't ask me why... I can't really explain it myself. But for some reason, the Christian boy, out of all 4 of them, is the one that understands my fucked up-ass sense of humor the most. How fucked up is THAT!!!! I swear, when we're together, it's like we're two peas that came from the same pod. I actually get along better with him than with any of my past exes.

I can't say for sure though. I haven't slept with the drug kingpin or the Christian boy (or the gorilla ) yet so I can't definitively say for sure who I like best yet. It all pretty much boils down to who is the best lay and works the hardest to make me cum buckets. It's really weird, I've been on like 5 dates with the drug kingpin and he still hasn't even tried to fuck me yet. I'm turning into an impatient motherfucker!

Crystal G said:

The5thElement said:

waiting for the gorilla report 

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Man, you guys have gotta give me at least a week to complete this. I've got work and shit, and I'm supposed to see at least 2 more guys this weekend. It's tough work juggling guys you know, I've got a schedule and shit!

Don't worry though, I'm making the gorilla my top priority.

So far, we've been instant messaging it up on Facebook and flirting a lot. He mentions that he's really excited to see me, so I know it's going to happen.

And when I DO go fuck him, I'mma be like ".......sooooo hook it up with summa that human growth hormone."

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No rest for the wicked, go for gold, 110%, if you're not first you're last.

Ummm uh, damn can't think of any other sayings; but ummm good luck and I hope you corrupt that christian boy and bring him to the dark side. Don't go easy on him because he's got jesus on his side, Divide and conquer Dammit

Points if you get him to renounce his faith

Crystal G said:

I was trying to orchestrate an orgy with them and my swinger couple friends, but you know how it goes:

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no, no i don't

that guy is gross though. i look forward to you reporting back...with pictures.

Quote:

So I've been messaging this guy from OkCupid to meet up with him, and he's this a raging monster who just moved from Jersey (of course).

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Ever bang some computer nerds?

The5thElement said:

The weekend draws nearer

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The5thElement said:

The weekend draws nearer

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He's going to Chicago this weekend because he's still apparently in the process of moving his shit out here. Which is fine, I am pretty busy this weekend. UFC fight on Saturday and got a date with the good and wholesome Christian boy on Friday.

He started telling me about how awesome roids sex is though, and I'm like... fucking drooling here with a massive clit-boner listening to him talk. I've always wanted to try roids sex, and it makes me want to go on a cycle with him and have super raging beast-mode fuck-sessions 8 times a day.

He keeps telling me that he's into really buff women, aaaaaand as luck would have it, I'm trying to get pretty jacked myself. Dude, I am SOOOOO going to have him hook it up with the roids and HGH!!!! This shit is going to be the most ridiculous-ass experience of my life.

This guy is really, really funny. Apparently foreplay for him was me telling him, "I want to get so fucking swoll, I want to be able to pick cars up and just throw them. I want to be able to punk dudes for their dick!!!!!!"

And don't worry guys, I'll post pictures of my huge-ass clit once it starts growing into a full-fledged wiener.

Edit: On the plus side, expect my sex stories to get way, WAYYYY more epic once I start doing a roids cycle.