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evenbreak
Stranger
Registered: 01/16/11
Posts: 583
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my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. 2
#17958404 - 03/15/13 12:23 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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i made several threads here about her, how she led me on and then brushed me off when i asked her out last year.
I gave her a long speech today where i profess my crush towards her and tell her i have very strong feelings for her and i can't handle it and I just want her to reject me so i can move on. she said she's not going to reject me. I beg her to. she says no. I ask her out. she asks where. I throw out "movie", and she said yes.
we're going to meet up next week thursday morning to watch a movie. we both work the night shift that day, and she has kids and i have class so we don't have that much free time.
so what's going to happen? How is this going to go down? i doubt we'll be doing anything sexual given the time period that we'll be going out. i have no experience with girls.
what do i do?
and is this just another of her tricks? Is she still leading me on, but taking it one step further this time by getting a free movie out of it?
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Fedor
Yet another psychonaut



Registered: 08/14/12
Posts: 520
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17958457 - 03/15/13 12:42 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Great news man! Just be honest, be congruent, be yourself and be brave. When and if you feel like it, make a move, try to touch her. If you don't feel like it, don't do it. It's all about how you feel and what you desire, but of course have consideration for her. If she doesn't let you do anything sexual, don't force it. Try it and see, but don't apologize for your natural desires
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basqueshaman
Todays scapegoat



Registered: 04/01/11
Posts: 6,258
Loc: Washington State
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: Fedor]
#17958632 - 03/15/13 01:47 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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i wish you the best of luck
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Adden

Registered: 06/04/03
Posts: 39,201
Loc:
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17958710 - 03/15/13 02:07 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
evenbreak said: i made several threads here about her, how she led me on and then brushed me off when i asked her out last year.
I gave her a long speech today where i profess my crush towards her and tell her i have very strong feelings for her and i can't handle it and I just want her to reject me so i can move on. she said she's not going to reject me. I beg her to. she says no. I ask her out. she asks where. I throw out "movie", and she said yes.
we're going to meet up next week thursday morning to watch a movie. we both work the night shift that day, and she has kids and i have class so we don't have that much free time.
so what's going to happen? How is this going to go down? i doubt we'll be doing anything sexual given the time period that we'll be going out. i have no experience with girls.
what do i do?
and is this just another of her tricks? Is she still leading me on, but taking it one step further this time by getting a free movie out of it?
Nice!
Well, she could have had a year now to regret saying no to you.
Either way sounds like she's interested.
I doubt someone would just try to get a free $8 movie.. man.. you're good.
Godspeed!
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ManianFH
living in perverty


Registered: 07/06/04
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: Adden]
#17958745 - 03/15/13 02:17 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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bring a sexy movie over to her house, something so ridiculous you wont be able to watch it very long, like lord of the g strings. morning sex
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,670
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17958751 - 03/15/13 02:18 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Uhm, well good luck. I hope it works out.
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evenbreak
Stranger
Registered: 01/16/11
Posts: 583
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17958889 - 03/15/13 03:27 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Well, i don't understand one thing. The other day we were flirting a lot, and when we were alone she just out of the blue asked me "If I wanted to have sex with you, would you have sex with me?"
That seems like .. well, she wants the D.
But when i asked her out, the first thing I said was "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" because I was trying to get her to reject me. She didn't say no, but she didn't say yes either. She said "you have to get to know me first." So I asked her out, and she asked where. I tried to be funny and made jokes about going to mcdonalds. she didn't really laugh and she said to come back to her when I think of a good place to go. That's when I said movie theater and she agreed.
What does this sound like to you guys? It sounds like she doesn't really want to have a sex on the first date thing with me...
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Fedor
Yet another psychonaut



Registered: 08/14/12
Posts: 520
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17958924 - 03/15/13 03:44 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
evenbreak said: Well, i don't understand one thing. The other day we were flirting a lot, and when we were alone she just out of the blue asked me "If I wanted to have sex with you, would you have sex with me?"
That seems like .. well, she wants the D.
But when i asked her out, the first thing I said was "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" because I was trying to get her to reject me. She didn't say no, but she didn't say yes either. She said "you have to get to know me first." So I asked her out, and she asked where. I tried to be funny and made jokes about going to mcdonalds. she didn't really laugh and she said to come back to her when I think of a good place to go. That's when I said movie theater and she agreed.
What does this sound like to you guys? It sounds like she doesn't really want to have a sex on the first date thing with me...
Dude, she can always change her mind. People are ever changing! Don't lose your confidence so easily, don't doubt yourself. Just go with what you feel, sincerely.
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sidewayz6.6
Bewildered White Boy


Registered: 07/27/07
Posts: 1,348
Loc: USA
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: Fedor]
#17958948 - 03/15/13 04:06 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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You guys are gonna make out/get it on in the movie theater. I used to do that all the time with my ex before we got hooked on heroin, then I would just nod out 15 minutes into the movie.
--------------------
Anything I post is purely theoretical, and not based in reality. All pictures are from google. A big part of me has died inside and I don't know if it will ever come back. Nothing makes me happy anymore. I use drugs and alcohol to numb the pain, and my sense of humor to hide the rest. I don't share these feelings with anyone in real life.
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,670
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17958958 - 03/15/13 04:13 AM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Truth be told, she sounds about as insecure as you are and it's a miracle that you didn't completely blow it by 'trying to get her to reject' you. I'd recommend to consider her as a keeper.
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evenbreak
Stranger
Registered: 01/16/11
Posts: 583
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: koraks]
#17960545 - 03/15/13 01:44 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
koraks said: Truth be told, she sounds about as insecure as you are and it's a miracle that you didn't completely blow it by 'trying to get her to reject' you. I'd recommend to consider her as a keeper.
yeah. it makes no sense that she said yes after i basically acted like a pathetic bitch. i was almost begging. "please just reject me, it hurts so bad, i'm crushing on you so hard and i can't take it, pleaase"
it makes me skeptical of this whole situation. it makes me think she's still playing me.
i can't take this suspense. i wish i could man up and have some confidence, because i'm pretty sure if i keep this up i'm going to turn her off inevitably.
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jw2234
Astral Traveler



Registered: 08/17/09
Posts: 1,237
Loc: Bay Area
Last seen: 7 years, 3 months
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17960865 - 03/15/13 02:45 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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on one level you dont have any idea what she wants and why she wants you in this way. well maybe you do, we get attracted to eachother for many reasons and i bet if you loosened up a bit more you'd start seeing those things, why she likes you.
the best plan that ever was and will be in regards to courting women is to be yourself. yeahyeahyeah but some girls like loud dicks and all that and maybe those dudes get more poon than you (these are all thoughts, its much more complex than this!!!), but by being yourself you assure many things. you assure that you arent straining to say waht you want to say and do what you want to do; you see and feel the moment much better than if you are pretending to be other things, which means you'll have a better gauge of when she wants a kiss and when you can go down on her (this is a must too if youre not willing to go down why expect it in return? doing this will TOOTALLLY get her physically into you-and go for the clit and come in with the point of your tounge from underneath it to stimulate it instead of the clitoral hood...
dude good luck. just be yourself, everything comes from that honesty. everything
-------------------- ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ there is nothing to fear with this chemical besides astonishing realization that everything IS indeed 1 entity Questions
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evenbreak
Stranger
Registered: 01/16/11
Posts: 583
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: jw2234]
#17969348 - 03/17/13 03:23 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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wow i don't even know. She made me so fucking sad last night.
Giving me a bunch of attention when no one's around, then when other attractive guys are around she ignores me and flirts with them heavily in front of me. While KNOWING that I have very strong feelings for her. Asking someone to give her a massage while she giggles and moans while sitting right next to me. Staring at me and smiling and asking if I'm ok while I'm sitting there fuming with jealousy on the inside but trying to keep my calm and not let it get to me. As if she's trying to get a reaction out of me.
So fucking sad and confused and mad. She literally just played with my emotions and laughed at it.
I told her I bet she won't even call me when we go out. She swears she will.
If she even calls me, I'm just going to take her out to get food so we can sit and talk about what happened. I'm going to ask her why she did that to me. I'm going to ask her if everything she said to me about how she likes me was just a lie and she's just using me for attention.
you guys can't imagine the emotions I felt last night.. jesus fuck. It's so confusing because I'm resenting her for hurting me yet I still want her.
Edited by evenbreak (03/17/13 03:29 PM)
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evenbreak
Stranger
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak] 1
#17969365 - 03/17/13 03:27 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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and if she doesn't call me, I guess I'll just never talk to her again.
fuck, i just want to hurt myself or something so I can feel some physical pain to distract myself from the emotional pain that I'm feeling.
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Fedor
Yet another psychonaut



Registered: 08/14/12
Posts: 520
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17969497 - 03/17/13 03:58 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
evenbreak said: fuck, i just want to hurt myself or something so I can feel some physical pain to distract myself from the emotional pain that I'm feeling.
Don't do that. She's acting like a bitch, and it's not your fault at all. You don't need people like that to be around you, or tell her to change her ways because you don't want to hang out with her anymore, if she acts like that.
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EllisDSox
King Hella!

Registered: 01/22/07
Posts: 25,730
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak] 1
#17969737 - 03/17/13 04:52 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Not to be horrendously negative, but I've read all your threads about this girl, and she sounds like she cannot handle attention and will play games with any guy who doesn't come across as a confident as a force of nature and put her in her place.
By all means, take her out and see what happens, but she seems all too willing to shit on people she considers herself to have power over. Given the (in some ways admirable) level of openness and vulnerability you've shown her, you fall into the category of people she thinks she has power over.
Good luck, and I really do wish you well, but don't put a tremendous amount of hope on this girl. She sounds manipulative and weak willed, based on what you've said about her in the past.
-------------------- Disclaimer: If you have any kind of heart condition, my posts are not for you. You could literally die from reading the first couple of words in any one of them. Scroll down the page, live your life and prosper, but don't read my posts because your heart will probably explode. I am not joking.
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mpd
Lammen Gorthaur



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Posts: 9,660
Loc: Mostly at home... Mostly....
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: EllisDSox] 1
#17969796 - 03/17/13 05:07 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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This person does not have the emotional capacity to sustain a relationship, OP. She is one of those people who are completely terrified of emotional intimacy and will never be able to sustain a relationship.
Move on. She is not going to change and come back to you the way you desire.
-------------------- There is no truer calling for mankind than that of true conservatism.
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evenbreak
Stranger
Registered: 01/16/11
Posts: 583
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: mpd]
#17969816 - 03/17/13 05:10 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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yes she does.. she used to be married and she has 3 kids.
you know what makes me sad?
The guy who said this woman needs a man who's confident to put her in her place.
I want to be that man, but i'm just a weak little bitch and that's why she walks all over me .
I don't even know what approach to take the next time I see her. Do I show my vulnerability again, or do I harden myself and straight up tell her that she's really messing me up and we can't talk anymore?
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evenbreak
Stranger
Registered: 01/16/11
Posts: 583
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17969873 - 03/17/13 05:23 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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i mean you're all right, obviously she's being a total bitch.
But I know there's a good side in her too. I know she's a kind person. I suspect she just has a personality flaw of craving attention way too much. She craves it so much that she's willing to hurt people that she would normally care about to get it... she's not a bad person.
I don't know if it's as simple as completely cutting her off and moving on. We're coworkers too... and i'd like to maintain friendly relations with her without dying inside every time I see her.
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EllisDSox
King Hella!

Registered: 01/22/07
Posts: 25,730
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Re: my coworker that ive crushed on for 2 years said yes. [Re: evenbreak]
#17969886 - 03/17/13 05:25 PM (10 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
evenbreak said: yes she does.. she used to be married and she has 3 kids.
you know what makes me sad?
The guy who said this woman needs a man who's confident to put her in her place.
I want to be that man, but i'm just a weak little bitch and that's why she walks all over me .
I wasn't saying that as a criticism of your character, I'm just observing that there is a certain type of woman who will mistreat and disrespect anyone who doesn't give them a firm hand. Even if you were a guy that's confident in the way a girl like that wants, it wouldn't make her the girl for you. That someone will mistreat anyone they feel will not retaliate and respect only those who they see as strong isn't the best indication of a good person. If you're the type of guy who just wants to avoid games, be straight up and honest and expects the same of a woman, she's not the girl for you. Don't idolise the girl just because you've wanted her for a long time and be denied. Take her as she is, and see if the real person (rather than your fantasy woman personified) is actually worth a damn.
Quote:
evenbreak said: I don't even know what approach to take the next time I see her. Do I show my vulnerability again, or do I harden myself and straight up tell her that she's really messing me up and we can't talk anymore?
You can't fake it, one way or another. If you have the confidence, just ask her straight up whether she's interested or not, make it clear you're fine either way, and that you'd rather drop contact entirely than play games.
Quote:
I don't know if it's as simple as completely cutting her off and moving on. We're coworkers too... and i'd like to maintain friendly relations with her without dying inside every time I see her.
Didn't see that post before I made mine. If cutting contact isn't an option, just amend what I said above to basically state "friends or something more, but no fucking around in between".
-------------------- Disclaimer: If you have any kind of heart condition, my posts are not for you. You could literally die from reading the first couple of words in any one of them. Scroll down the page, live your life and prosper, but don't read my posts because your heart will probably explode. I am not joking.
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