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OfflineEarth_Droid
Stranger
Registered: 04/19/02
Posts: 5,240
Last seen: 17 years, 6 months
Kill Myself? or Live Suffering
    #1795432 - 08/09/03 01:42 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

If I wasn'st so chicken I would kill myself. Is there at least a way i can go unconsiouss for a while. Otherwise i dont k now what ill do. I just finished crying and it is not enough. I used to cut myself, but I know that won't help. I just want to keep crying and crying but I can't cry. I just want to suffer to the point where I don't care, but I am hanging on a cliff. I don't know what the fuck to do anymore.


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Offlined4m0n
journeyman

Registered: 04/29/03
Posts: 92
Last seen: 19 years, 9 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1795452 - 08/09/03 01:51 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

if your a man get a lil girl to blow your head off witha shotgun in front of a camera by telling her its fake and your making a movie :nut:  .  What are you crying bout anyway? I have been threw alot so maybe your suffering isnt as bad as you think man.


Edited by d4m0n (08/09/03 02:34 PM)


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OfflineTwirling
Barred Spiral
Male

Registered: 02/03/03
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: d4m0n]
    #1795578 - 08/09/03 02:39 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Definitely keep pressing on. There have been many moments in my life where I felt the way you do, and I felt like there was no way out, but it's possible. Many of the things you are talking about, cutting, suicidal thoughts, crying etc... are outlets for the emotions you're dealing with. I highly recommend if you're feeling as low as you do to get help from a qualified psychtrist. The most important thing is to find someone you feel comfortable with and who you feel understands you. It might seem like that's impossible, but there are many wise psychtrists out there (and quite a few quacks too, but don't let that discourage you). If that doesn?t seem like a good idea, try to find someone who can listen to what you have to say and help you mend the way you feel. Sometimes being able to express how you feel without judgment is the best way to change negative behavior.

d4m0n, there have been quite a few threads/chats where people have actually listened to that advice. The last thing we need is yet ANOTHER person following that advice.


--------------------
The very nature of experience is ineffable; it transcends cognitive thought and intellectualized analysis. To be without experience is to be without an emotional knowledge of what the experience translates into. The desire for the understanding of what life is made of is the motivation that drives us all. Without it, in fear of the experiences what life can hold is among the greatest contradictions; to live in fear of death while not being alive.



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Anonymous #1

Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1795639 - 08/09/03 02:54 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

dont kill yerself.

i liek u N i dont want u to suffer, i will be yer frend if noone else will.

be cool mine frend


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OfflineEarth_Droid
Stranger
Registered: 04/19/02
Posts: 5,240
Last seen: 17 years, 6 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Twirling]
    #1795641 - 08/09/03 02:54 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

I have been to so many psychiatrists and none have helped. And to top it off, I don't have a friend in the world that seems to understand me or want to listen to me.


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Offlineresin
Ghetto Monster
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Twirling]
    #1795649 - 08/09/03 02:57 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

THERES NOTHING WORTH KILLING YOURSELF OVER MAN! Look man everybody has hardtimes, its life. You just gotta keep on goin. Forreal dont kill yourself, why the hell would you want to kill yourself?


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Offlineneutralizer
Spiritual beinghaving a Humanexperience
Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 635
Loc: This Planet Earth
Last seen: 16 years, 11 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: resin]
    #1795659 - 08/09/03 02:59 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Live suffering for a time, you won't suffer forever. Just live, and don't give up.


--------------------
There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors - Morrison


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OfflineEarth_Droid
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Registered: 04/19/02
Posts: 5,240
Last seen: 17 years, 6 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: neutralizer]
    #1795697 - 08/09/03 03:11 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

I don't want to fucking kill myself. Of course what I am going through is hard and a part of life. But not everyone has the same degree of suffering!!! Should I go to the psych ward, would it make me any less of a person?


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Offlined4m0n
journeyman

Registered: 04/29/03
Posts: 92
Last seen: 19 years, 9 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: neutralizer]
    #1795720 - 08/09/03 03:22 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

No you dont understand. There ARE some things worth killing yourself over. This only applies to men. If you have been mortaly wounded in a very important area, If your love has entered the aetheric realm and you want to join her, and defending yourself and her till the end. This is why Im asking him whats wrong cuase if its one of the above 3 scenarios then I say GO FOR IT! Theres no were in the bible that says you would goto hell for this in fact theres many refrences were holy knights who have been mortaly wounded had some one doit for them and even had god do it for them. All though if you kill *anything* for the wrong no good reasons at all you WILL tourcher yourself in the eternal realm till you come back or some one pulls you out. Kinda like the movie "What Dreams May Come". The way it says to doit in the bible is if you cant doit to yourself, have god or some one else doit for you. Dont goto a psych cuase they just wanna lock you up so they can test experimental drugs on you. And most importantly *dont* take advice from some one who has a fagget ass animation in there signature like bucket_of_nines does.


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InvisibleFreakQlibrium
Son of Uncle Meat
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Registered: 06/06/02
Posts: 19,058
Loc: Toronto Canada Flag
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1795737 - 08/09/03 03:29 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

"Should I go to the psych ward, would it make me any less of a person?" Nahhhhhhh you'd still be cool Earth Droid, and besides psycho ward girls are the Madd HaXXor :P i haven't been on msn for 2 months or so, if you want to talk one on one give me da w3rd and i'll sign in in a bit.........


--------------------
"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"



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Offlineneutralizer
Spiritual beinghaving a Humanexperience
Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 635
Loc: This Planet Earth
Last seen: 16 years, 11 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1795904 - 08/09/03 04:20 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Earth_Droid said:
Should I go to the psych ward, would it make me any less of a person?




No, you would not be any less of a person. It would show a desire to heal, recognition of a problems in your life and effort to overcome the problems. It is a very brave thing and a difficult thing that many people aren't able to do.

I hope that the intensity of the suffering decreases soon my friend.


--------------------
There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors - Morrison


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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1796011 - 08/09/03 04:59 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Why leave the rest of us sufferers here by killing yourself?

We'll all cheer (and help cheer eachother) up with time :wink:

Give your life some MORE TIME.... ALWAYS :smile:

But remember that time can't help you on its own.


Stick around, man.. if only for those in "worse" situations than yourself who are hanging in there, pulling themselves out.

edit: as for getting help; lol there's no way that committing yourself makes you less of a person. In my opinion, sitting there thinking that you should be getting help and not GETTING help is much more of a "lessEning" experience. A co-worker of mine was in a ward for a couple years, and says he thanks himself every day for going in.


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE


Edited by Strumpling (08/09/03 05:04 PM)


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OfflineTwirling
Barred Spiral
Male

Registered: 02/03/03
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1796051 - 08/09/03 05:09 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Earth_Droid said:
I don't want to fucking kill myself. Of course what I am going through is hard and a part of life. But not everyone has the same degree of suffering!!! Should I go to the psych ward, would it make me any less of a person?




I've seen quite a bit of psychs. myself, and only a few of them were able to help me. A psych. ward might not be that bad of an idea, but try to find one where you could sign yourself in & out, and one with people with problems simular to yours. It would be easy to find low-functioning people and that would be hard to gain something from. If you can find one that does group-therapy, you might be surprised at how open, honest, and understanding people can be. But I understand the frustration from trying these things cause many times it feels like it doesn't work. Good luck.


--------------------
The very nature of experience is ineffable; it transcends cognitive thought and intellectualized analysis. To be without experience is to be without an emotional knowledge of what the experience translates into. The desire for the understanding of what life is made of is the motivation that drives us all. Without it, in fear of the experiences what life can hold is among the greatest contradictions; to live in fear of death while not being alive.



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OfflineMsPacMan
Stranger

Registered: 10/05/02
Posts: 1,054
Loc: Florida, USA
Last seen: 16 years, 7 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Twirling]
    #1796109 - 08/09/03 05:40 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Tell your self you are going to kill yourself next week. then live this week like you have never lived before. forget about everyone, do everything that makes you happy. go running, walk through a grocery store and start up crazy conversations with random people, anything you can think of and anything you've always wanted to do. you never know...you may discover something that makes you happy.


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Invisibletak
geo's henchman
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: MsPacMan]
    #1796142 - 08/09/03 05:54 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

What is the problem? Brain cancer? any other disease?


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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Invisibletak
geo's henchman
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: tak]
    #1796156 - 08/09/03 06:00 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

:wink: I know your problems are probably pretty bad, but what im trying to say is that nothing is worthkilling yourself over. I do not know the xtent of your problems, but there are people in third world countries who are starving, they would kill to eat a meal in wich anyone in this country eats 3 times a day. I may have lost my girlfriend to some asshole, and im 35,000$ in debt but there are people out there who just lost 5 family members to disease and starvation, and wish there was such a thing as debt where they came from. They are struggling to just survive, they dont have shrinks, or medication, or people to tell thier problems to.

Now that i sound like an asshole, im sorry. We are here to listen to you, if your friends dont, maybe you shouldnt be calling them friends.  Things have a way of fixing themselves if you let them, and all you gotta do is hang on. Stand strong and win the battle :smile: Im here if you ever need to talk, and ill listen..that i can promise you


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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OfflineEarth_Droid
Stranger
Registered: 04/19/02
Posts: 5,240
Last seen: 17 years, 6 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: tak]
    #1796205 - 08/09/03 06:21 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

I feel much better now. I will explain the problem later, but it is long and on going. Thanks for all the help. It helps to know I have even one friend, internet friends are just as good.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1796390 - 08/09/03 07:29 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

n/a


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Offlinefloridaboi101
Fiddlestix

Registered: 07/31/03
Posts: 282
Loc: SW Florida
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: ]
    #1796583 - 08/09/03 08:47 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

d4m0n...why are you bein a jackass? someone has problems and you sayin go for it? what kinda mickey mouse horse shit is that? grow up man


--------------------
Got weed?


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Invisibletak
geo's henchman
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: floridaboi101]
    #1796749 - 08/09/03 09:59 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

word earth_droid. internet friends are friends who can listen, because we dont get caught up in looks & how you talk, what color your skin is, how much money you have, and where you come from. We communicate on a base level, there are good things and bad things about it, but we sure as hell are human, and i dont know what i would do without this community, people here i have never met, and probably will never meet have changed my life for the better, and are more like family than friends. Just keep that in mind at all times. You help make this place what it is, and we need you around :smile:


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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Offlineatomikfunksoldier
T'was born oftrue in the yearof the cock!

Registered: 04/07/03
Posts: 1,500
Loc: a human-infested anthill
Last seen: 20 years, 4 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: tak]
    #1797374 - 08/10/03 03:24 AM (20 years, 5 months ago)

time and change will heal everything. wait 80 years, and if you're still depressed then kill yourself.

time goes very quick to bro, so things will straighten out sooner than you think!


--------------------
enjoy the entertaining indentity i have constructed for you while you can.


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OfflineHarveyWalbanger
Demiurge
Male

Registered: 06/24/02
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1798336 - 08/10/03 02:17 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

And why the fuck do you cut yourself?! I have 6 deep scars on my upper left arm for the rest of my life for that crap. Everytime I go swimming I get to tell the story of the worst time of my life.


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InvisibleAdden
I'm a teapot
Registered: 06/04/03
Posts: 39,201
Loc: Flag
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1798616 - 08/10/03 03:34 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

You don't want to go to the psych ward. Trust me on this one.

Glad to hear you're feeling better.  :wink:

If you ever need anything from a man who has been down the road you're on right now, PM me and we can chat.

Be well,

2dope 


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OfflinePantherionShroom
Nothing
Registered: 07/17/03
Posts: 41
Loc: I live in my own world!
Last seen: 19 years, 2 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: tak]
    #1798660 - 08/10/03 03:52 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Hey If you ever feeling like talking to someone, I will be here for you, just message me ok? And dont liseten to d4m.


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Offlined4m0n
journeyman

Registered: 04/29/03
Posts: 92
Last seen: 19 years, 9 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: tak]
    #1798896 - 08/10/03 05:15 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

If you got your arms, legs and eye balls melted off in some freak accident acid spill and all that was left was the top half of your tourso I will personlay throw you in the lions pit at the zoo just cuase I dont wanna see you suffering. But if its something like your girlfreind dumped you than I will just smack you upside the head just for thinking about it. Maybe if I WAS around for the ripper ordeal I coulda knocked some sense into him.


Edited by d4m0n (08/10/03 06:36 PM)


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Offlinepattern
multiplayer

Registered: 07/19/02
Posts: 2,185
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 3 years, 10 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1798936 - 08/10/03 05:33 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Dude you can always talk to me online, and if you do kill yourself, I will come to the afterlife and hunt you down and give you an asskicking!! so dont do it.

There are alot of people here that are alike and if we want the world to be better for us, all we gotta do is live in it.


--------------------
man = monkey + mushroom


Edited by pattern (08/10/03 05:38 PM)


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OfflineMindTrap
Disembodiedvoice
Registered: 08/02/02
Posts: 349
Loc: It's all in your head...
Last seen: 19 years, 1 month
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: pattern]
    #1798994 - 08/10/03 05:44 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Stop with the self-multilation crap. That is just going to destroy your self-esteem even more. And then when you see those scars it will just remind you of your problems.

What you really need to do is work on yourself in a productive manner.

Excercise, read a book, take a trip somewhere you haven't been, get a new job, etc. Basically just break up your destructive routine. If what you're doing isn't working for you then change something.

You need to get out of your funk or noone will want to befriend you in real life.


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OfflineEarth_Droid
Stranger
Registered: 04/19/02
Posts: 5,240
Last seen: 17 years, 6 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: MindTrap]
    #1799335 - 08/10/03 07:19 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

MindTrap, I don't need friends that won't accept me for me regardless if I get depressed sometimes. I said I stopped self mutilation, of course it makes things worse. That is why I said cutting doesn't help. But honestly when you get depressed as I do it is very very hard to get out of a bad situation. Everything feels like a trap.


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Offlineneutralizer
Spiritual beinghaving a Humanexperience
Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 635
Loc: This Planet Earth
Last seen: 16 years, 11 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1799490 - 08/10/03 08:16 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

That mentality is something that I was able to change about myself. I've been okay for a little over a year now and so far so good. It takes time (took me a couple years) and effort, but it is definately worth it and it is a huge growing experience. After a long time of trying and hoping to get better, for me it came to a point one day where I was actually like "fuck this, I don't want to feel this way anymore" and from then on it became much easier to pull myself up into a completely new world of emotions and attitudes and of living.

It takes work, but it is a way out of that way of feeling, and it is definately well worth it. I was into self injury and i have some nice burn scars on my upper arm that'll be with me for a long time to come. I never was institutionalized and I never did attempt suicide, though I was very close, I had a plans and all. I found that time is the most important factor and can be the worst one to endure.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, give it time and don't give up. Coming from someone who has been through his own version of it.


--------------------
There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors - Morrison


Edited by neutralizer (08/10/03 08:30 PM)


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Invisibletak
geo's henchman
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: neutralizer]
    #1799784 - 08/10/03 10:00 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Friends can be bad man. The idea of a friendship is someone who is there for you, who you can both mutually kinda rely on eachother and make one another stronger. People often form friendships off something they share in common, because at that time they feel strong with that person. I know I have made friends with people because I knew no one else, and it just snowballed from there and sooner than I knew, i was around bad people messing my whole life up, but it was better than having no friends, right? ;\\\ Then some of the friends wanted stuff from me, and not give me anything in return. When i was having problems in my life, they turned thier back like it was not thier problem, how could it not be thier problem, I am thier best friend i would be there for them....I guess its not mutual. ;\ Becareful who your friends are, because relizing they are bad is 1 thing, but not relizing it, and either doing something stupid, or thinking that they dont care because of who you are, and not who they are. I dunno what im trying to say other than friends can be good and bad, remember that =]


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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OfflineWaveRider
In search ofWisdom

Registered: 01/12/03
Posts: 69
Loc: CANADA
Last seen: 19 years, 11 months
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1801269 - 08/11/03 10:41 AM (20 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Earth_Droid said:
I have been to so many psychiatrists and none have helped. And to top it off, I don't have a friend in the world that seems to understand me or want to listen to me.




Only you can help yourself! Life is suffering and joy, both sides are necessary. If you can see no reason to live then there will never be a reason, if you have a reason to live then that will keep you going a little longer, if you need no reason to live then you have searched inner peace. There is no reason to live but to know that you are alive, and able to experience the world for yourself. NO ONE can tell you what is right for you and the decision is your to make, no matter what is said here, they are only opinions and the only opinion that matters is yours.

PLEASE FEEL FREE TO IGNORE MY OPINION, IT IS ONLY THAT!


--------------------
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer, the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear, permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it is gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."


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Anonymous #1

Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: floridaboi101]
    #1801375 - 08/11/03 11:21 AM (20 years, 5 months ago)

n/a


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Anonymous #1

Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: floridaboi101]
    #1801398 - 08/11/03 11:30 AM (20 years, 5 months ago)

n/a


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Offlinegnrm23
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 08/29/99
Posts: 6,488
Loc: n. e. OH, USSA
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Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Earth_Droid]
    #1801852 - 08/11/03 01:27 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

"i show you suffering... and an end to suffering..."
please hang in there... suffering is part of existing as a sentient being... but so much of our suffering is caused by pointless clinging, and by needless aversion...
walk on...


--------------------
old enough to know better
not old enough to care


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InvisibleTomandjerry58
Stranger
Registered: 01/27/03
Posts: 5,212
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: gnrm23]
    #1802218 - 08/11/03 03:03 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

2 valum and three beers should put you out for a little while. hey smoke a good fatty too. i self mutulate sometimes too. only when im really deppresed though. try to get away from your current surroundings maybe rent a hotel with a jacuzzi if you have any money and go out clubing.meet some girls or something. just think if you killed yourself you would never be able to see the sun set a pretty flower or a gourgeous girl, your children if you have any, or pins when the first come out of your casing and you know your going to have a fantastic flush or a cool breeze on summer night. when i think about those things that make me happy i could never kill myself.u have such a short life to live and life is so precious hang on to it for every thing that its worth. i can tell that your young! don't do anything a 70 year old man wouldn't do.:)


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InvisibleIrradiated_Feces
doomedgeneration
 User Gallery

Registered: 07/11/03
Posts: 4,278
Loc: Great White North
Re: Kill Myself? or Live Suffering [Re: Tomandjerry58]
    #1802407 - 08/11/03 03:57 PM (20 years, 5 months ago)

It's been said if you kill yourself you go straight back to inutero, no relief for you just another lifetime of suffering, you gotta break the chains from within.


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