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Offlinejong21
Mycologist/CSMajor

Registered: 05/28/03
Posts: 576
Loc: Berkeley, CA
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help!
    #1795036 - 08/09/03 12:27 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

This post has nothing to do with drugs, but I am somewhat lost and I'm sure some of you have been through something similar or have been exposed to it in some way.

Recently my girlfriend has been suffering from severe chronic depression. This has been recurring for over a year, but has been very bad recently. I didn't know how long it has been going on until now. She had always been able to hide it from me until about 1.5 months ago, and with school coming up in a few weeks, and other stresses in her life, it has come to the point where several times a week, anywhere from a few hours to days each time, she'll become extremeley depressed (and usually the cause of the instance of depression is something very small or nothing at all). I think for her, I'm all she has in life, without me, she'd have killed herself a long time ago. And when she gets depressed, she tells me all she can think about is death.

What's worse, a month ago, after a really bad episode, I convinced her to see a school counselor (through UC Berkeley, where we are students). They fucked things up big time. During the bad episode she drank half a bottle of whiskey and took a whole bunch of sleeping pills, to make the pain go away. The counselors called her an alcoholic and hauled her off to the hospital in an ambulance, against her will. Now I know she was in a serious condition, but they could have had someone, like me, drive her there, and stayed with her. They gave her a 5150, which basically takes away all her rights. Thankfully, the hospital she went to realized it wasn't as severe as a 5150 and cleared her record, but the experience traumatized her and has made it impossible for her to even consider psychiatric help of any kind. I've convinced her to go to someone but I'll need to find the person, the thought of a psychiatrist really disturbs her. There's no way she could look for one by herself.

So that's why I'm coming here. How do I find someone GOOD, someone who will give her the drugs she needs (obviously she needs some anti depressants) and someone who won't listen to her for 15 minutes and call her an alcholic. I've got a list of about 20 locla people covered by her insurance.

If anyone here is from the San Francisco Bay area and has had some sort of contact with a really good psychiatrist, could you PM their info as well? I really want soemone who is willing to prescribe anti-depressants right off, she'll need the assurance at least of getting drugs right away, she doesn't think someone talking to her can help her (and I don't think they can either, at least not without some drugs to calm her down).

This situation is getting more and more serious and I'm infinitely worried...any advice would be appreciated. I've looked online and the only things I can find are services to check credentials and if doctors have had disciplinary action against them. I need more than that.

Thanks so much.

Jon


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I either talk about my friends in the first or third person, but I never, ever talk about myself on this website. Except that last sentence.


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Invisiblevampirism
Stranger
Male User Gallery

Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 8,120
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: jong21]
    #1795043 - 08/09/03 12:37 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

personally i DONT think psychiatrists are a good choice.. they do less than friends and charge tons of money. thats just my opinion though..

you say that you are all she has in life that she holds dear.. i dont think thats very good. but are you sure that you're the only thing? I don't mean to sound like an ass, but when the one thing you're holding on to is a person....


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Offlinejong21
Mycologist/CSMajor

Registered: 05/28/03
Posts: 576
Loc: Berkeley, CA
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: ]
    #1795049 - 08/09/03 12:40 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

She needs drugs, I can't get them for her. She has a horrible relationship with her family. She just got back from europe (trying to run away from her problems but only made them worse) so she really has no close friends left at school, at least for now. I don't know what else I can do, I've given her tons of support but it isn't enough.


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I either talk about my friends in the first or third person, but I never, ever talk about myself on this website. Except that last sentence.


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Offlineneutralizer
Spiritual beinghaving a Humanexperience
Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 635
Loc: This Planet Earth
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: jong21]
    #1795299 - 08/09/03 02:52 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Go through a regular physician, can she go to her or your primary physician? They can prescribe antidepressants, I believe.

Really, there are a lot of psychiatrists who give out meds like candy and it has become somewhat of a problem. Guess you just got unlucky with the one you guys went to first. (People like your gf aren't causing the problem, people like her can use meds but sometimes doctors give out meds as a quick-fix solution when they shouldn't be used that way.) Try another psychiatrist. Try going to your local MHMR (Mental Health and Mental Retardation) or local community clinic if you don't have insurance.


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There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors - Morrison


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OfflineTheHobbit
Pot Head Pixie

Registered: 09/04/02
Posts: 863
Loc: the Oily Way...
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: neutralizer]
    #1796736 - 08/09/03 11:55 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Perhaps bringing her around to the idea that it was a very bad incident , but one which is not exemplar of all psychiatric situations, might be best. It sounds like she really needs counseling, and maybe medication, but that's best decided upon between her and an appropriately trained professional. Definately a tough situation, but it might not be in her best interest fr you to take on the role as psychiatrist yourself, you know?


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Offlineneutralizer
Spiritual beinghaving a Humanexperience
Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 635
Loc: This Planet Earth
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: TheHobbit]
    #1797512 - 08/10/03 08:15 AM (13 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

TheHobbit said:
Definately a tough situation, but it might not be in her best interest fr you to take on the role as psychiatrist yourself, you know?




Good point. It can not only be really, really draining to you and your life (trust me, it is, I've drained people who've tried to help me) but it is really hard to replace years of training and experience in these specific situations with an ear and good intentions.


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There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors - Morrison


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Offlineenotake2
Stop Bush's war
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/30/03
Posts: 1,457
Loc: Comfy chair in my lounger...
Last seen: 5 years, 5 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: jong21]
    #1804865 - 08/12/03 09:34 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Markos suggested some time ago in another post an idea which was to ring around to different counsellors and ask them if they specialise in treating whatever problem. Depression is the most common problem seen to by counsellors so you shouldn't have any trouble finding one. I have worked in research in depression for a number of years and personally I would go for a counsellor who has experience with cognitive behavioural therapy. Just MO. If you could get your girlfriend to ring she could talk to the different therapists on the phone when inquiring about their expertise, to get a feel for whether she felt she could talk to them. If not, I'm sure you could find a good one for her. Good luck :smile:

Oh yeah, and a GP could prescribe her some antidepressants without her having to see a psychiatrist. The advantage of going to a psychiatrist is that they have a lot more experience with different patterns of presentation and so she might be more likely to get the right drug straight away. Just cause she sees one doesn't mean they will admit her to a hospital - they try to avoid that unless it is absutely necessary - usually only if the person is a threat to themselves or other people. She may well benefit straight off from whatever the GP gives her too.


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Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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Offlineenotake2
Stop Bush's war
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/30/03
Posts: 1,457
Loc: Comfy chair in my lounger...
Last seen: 5 years, 5 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: enotake2]
    #1806796 - 08/12/03 07:52 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

If she is severly depressed she may need drugs and counselling. Though don't try and get the counselling through a psychiatrist just the drugs b/c as others have said here - mostly they suck. Or get the drugs though a GP and counselling elsewhere.


--------------------
Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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OfflineRavinoff
LethargicSnorting Duck

Registered: 07/15/03
Posts: 686
Last seen: 13 years, 3 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: enotake2]
    #1809208 - 08/13/03 02:11 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Anyone who NEEDS drugs to get over depression and get their life together is probably too mentally immature to deal with other problems down the road in life...

sorry if I'm offending, it's just my belief that no one needs any help from anyone or anything, you are completely the master of your life


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OfflineFliquid
Back from being gone.
Male User Gallery

Registered: 03/18/02
Posts: 6,953
Loc: omotive
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
Re: How to find help for my GF? PLEASE help! [Re: jong21]
    #1812758 - 08/14/03 10:06 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

A psychologist is much better then drugs. They help you to find out where the real problem lays. And help you with ways to resolve them.

She should resolve her problems instead of desolve with drugs..
Might be a good idea to keep her of any drug for a while.
Drugs can increase the depression..


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:dancing: My latest music! :yesnod:


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